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By *gent6Agent9 OP Couple
over a year ago
Exeter, Bristol, London |
Hello
I (Mr Bond) have always felt slightly odd in how to approach a couple where everyone is bi or could be bi and actually get things started.. any ideas tips or tricks on how to over come this..   |
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Female half here. If we haven't chatted before then I will ask the lady if it's ok if I can kiss/touch/play with her. I never expect anything to be reciprocated.
Consent and boundaries are important to me so I just ask the questions 
Ms x |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Hello
I (Mr Bond) have always felt slightly odd in how to approach a couple where everyone is bi or could be bi and actually get things started.. any ideas tips or tricks on how to over come this.. "
It will depend entirely on whether, as you say, they are bi or just 'could be'. It's easy to establish on here. It'll either say so in their profile or you'll generally find out after a few message exchanges. In person (unless at a bi night at a club) if you've never spoken before you won't know til you ask or they tell you.
Once you've established that someone is bi then how to approach is no different to how you'd approach someone straight that you're interested in/attracted to. You just suggest some fun and ask if they'd be interested. Simple as that.
There's no magic formula, secret handshake or signal just because someone is bi. Just treat it as you would with a straight couple. |
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"Hello
I (Mr Bond) have always felt slightly odd in how to approach a couple where everyone is bi or could be bi and actually get things started.. any ideas tips or tricks on how to over come this.. "
My experience with bi-male play is that there can be a lot of reluctance to bringing the subject up at first. I’ve found a confident but open approach is often helpful - making it clear at appropriate points in conversation / chat that it’s potentially of interest to me but not requiring a reaction there and then. Sometimes it’s much later in the evening (or another occasion even) when a couple feels they’re up for talking more / taking things further. It’s still quite a taboo at times - even when couples are hoping to explore it. And as other people have said on here, all the usual issues around respect / boundaries / checking both parties are on the same page matter too. I’ve been in a situation with a woman who was very keen to see her husband take things further but it was stressing him as much as it was turning him on, so we calmed things down for the night. The next time we met things were more relaxed - and fun for all! |
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"Hello
I (Mr Bond) have always felt slightly odd in how to approach a couple where everyone is bi or could be bi and actually get things started.. any ideas tips or tricks on how to over come this.. "
Hey..fully bi couple here...when we are approaching a couple who could be bi we just straight up and ask...if the male says straight and the lady says bi on their profile, we still always ask if the male is into bi play with man during meets..we have never Ince had a rude shitty reply back...its either just been yeah he has sacked a few cocks during play or no sorry he isn't at all...straight up ask them...it saves waisting your time and theirs. |
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I think it's difficult in English society to be direct but you need to be in this game. In general too many opportunities have been lost in the club environment due to shyness. Not aggressively, just be comfortable to polity asks, bring it up in conversation or put forward your intentions. Everyone is used to it and won't be offended (sadly some people are still a bit funny about bi guys, so I get extra sensitivity). In our experience many couples have a bi guy, or after some shade of male on male action. We've been asked plenty of times. Normally it's a simple as dropping into the conversation are you bi, or do you play with guys and women? It's no big deal, nothing to be abashed by. We simply explain Mrs is Bi, Mrs is straight, its no problem.
Plus if your both bi its well worth asking an not relying on what youve seen of thier profile or the impression you get. We know and have been approached by a few couples who are fab officially straight (especially in terms of the guy) but are not when it comes to getting down to it. Which is fine, but really helps when everyone understands each other.
I think there is a bit of a sense in the scene that women are assumed bi by default and guys straight by default. Both are unfortunate assumptions and things are far better when people establish these things early on and just direct with each other. |
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