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Nicest possible rejections
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How can I reject someone in the most pleasant way possible so I don’t get abusive messages back?
I don’t think ignoring is the best way to reject guys but if I say “I don’t want to meet sorry”and be straight they get all aggressive
How can I make my rejections more pleasant ?
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"Don't apologise and don't be ambiguous.
"No thank you, best wishes". Then block.
"
Okay I get you…. The only way not to get aggressive replies is to block after you reject
Thanks for the advice xx |
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"Don't apologise and don't be ambiguous.
"No thank you, best wishes". Then block.
Okay I get you…. The only way not to get aggressive replies is to block after you reject
Thanks for the advice xx"
It's the only sure way. Sometimes they'll start another account just to pour vitriol but having new accounts filtered from messaging you stops that.
I think you need to remember that politeness is a good thing but there is no polite way to reject someone that makes it less of a rejection and some can't handle it.
We're fortunate in that most people either don't respond or reply politely |
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I have found it doesn't matter how polite you are there will always be people who can't take rejection and get abusive.
This is why site rules say a no reply = a no thank you and why most of the time I just delete and don't reply. |
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By *_MariusMan
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"[Removed by poster at 27/03/22 10:47:53]"
"I'm sorry darling but I'm looking for something else"...If somebody rejected me like that, it would work fine for me and I'd never pester for owt again. Then again, you might well get plenty of abuse from some even with a rejection like that. So, you will n e v e r please everybody. |
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"Don't apologise and don't be ambiguous.
"No thank you, best wishes". Then block.
Okay I get you…. The only way not to get aggressive replies is to block after you reject
Thanks for the advice xx
It's the only sure way. Sometimes they'll start another account just to pour vitriol but having new accounts filtered from messaging you stops that.
I think you need to remember that politeness is a good thing but there is no polite way to reject someone that makes it less of a rejection and some can't handle it.
We're fortunate in that most people either don't respond or reply politely "
Thanks a lot for this advice xx |
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"Don't apologise and don't be ambiguous.
"No thank you, best wishes". Then block. "
If you block someone immediately after replying you will never know if you got a polite reply thanking you for a polite reply.. |
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"I just say "thanks, but no, thanks" or similar, and usually block them after. That stops any more messages, and stops us from wasting each other's time."
Yes the blocking seems to be the best advice so far xx |
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"[Removed by poster at 27/03/22 10:47:53]
"I'm sorry darling but I'm looking for something else"...If somebody rejected me like that, it would work fine for me and I'd never pester for owt again. Then again, you might well get plenty of abuse from some even with a rejection like that. So, you will n e v e r please everybody."
Thanks for that no not everyone is happy with that xx |
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"I have found it doesn't matter how polite you are there will always be people who can't take rejection and get abusive.
This is why site rules say a no reply = a no thank you and why most of the time I just delete and don't reply. "
Oh I didn’t realise that was the site rules good advice thanks xx |
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"Don't apologise and don't be ambiguous.
"No thank you, best wishes". Then block.
If you block someone immediately after replying you will never know if you got a polite reply thanking you for a polite reply.."
I don’t need to know if they are abusive or not I need to stop the abuse I get already thanks for your perspective xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Wishing well and "happy fabbing" work's for couples/ladies who message nice or polite though sometimes it's best just to ignore and delete.
We are both social people and find it difficult because although we are happy to interact with everyone on a social level at say a club, party or social we don't consider everyone we wish to interact with sexually.
It can get quite tricky We get a lot of people let's just say older than us who message outside our age range. If they are telling porkies by 10 years on the profile age we would probably add politely we are looking for people inside our age range or about our age.
If they can't be honest we don't feel that it's fair and would put us off more than anything else.
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"Don't apologise and don't be ambiguous.
"No thank you, best wishes". Then block.
If you block someone immediately after replying you will never know if you got a polite reply thanking you for a polite reply.."
I can happily live with that.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don't apologise and don't be ambiguous.
"No thank you, best wishes". Then block.
If you block someone immediately after replying you will never know if you got a polite reply thanking you for a polite reply.."
Why would you care if someone wants to thank you for your no thanks? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just don’t reply set their message to unread and block them if they keep sending more.
Some guys will never know when to quit so don’t bother trying to be nice to them. |
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
If I say no thanks ,then I do block afterwards.I said no ta last week and must have forgotten to block,then he started the well why not messages .
I usually just say thanks but no thanks ,happy swinging. |
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By *os19Man
over a year ago
Edmonton |
"How can I reject someone in the most pleasant way possible so I don’t get abusive messages back?
I don’t think ignoring is the best way to reject guys but if I say “I don’t want to meet sorry”and be straight they get all aggressive
How can I make my rejections more pleasant ?
" . Sorry to hear that you have received aggressive messages from guys that you don’t want to meet.I know that I sent you a message and you replied back saying no thanks I accepted it and possible messaged you back saying good luck with your search. I feel the best way is not to respond to the messages if they continue then just block.Once again best of luck with search. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If someone has sent a particularly nice message where thought has been put into it I will politely decline as I feel they deserve it for being genuine, but 90% of the time people haven't even bothered reading my profile so why do I need to be courteous?
I've put on my profile that an ignored or deleted message is a polite 'no thank you'. I don't have time or interest in being nice to everyone as I don't owe anyone anything.
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
I'd say just block nobody deserves a reply after reading it's just an option saves the hassle but if you do reply just a not interested should be enough and block saying not interested is just as much polite |
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"How can I reject someone in the most pleasant way possible so I don’t get abusive messages back?
I don’t think ignoring is the best way to reject guys but if I say “I don’t want to meet sorry”and be straight they get all aggressive
How can I make my rejections more pleasant ?
"
I always say not for me sorry .... Happy fabbing and leave it at that if they get aggressive then I block |
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"How can I reject someone in the most pleasant way possible so I don’t get abusive messages back?
I don’t think ignoring is the best way to reject guys but if I say “I don’t want to meet sorry”and be straight they get all aggressive
How can I make my rejections more pleasant ?
" I think just be honest and nice if people get aggressive then your decision to reject was right I’ve been rejected many times and I was always polite in fact a couple of times I was rejected and was polite back they suddenly became interested it’s a good way of finding nice guys I think |
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"How can I reject someone in the most pleasant way possible so I don’t get abusive messages back?
I don’t think ignoring is the best way to reject guys but if I say “I don’t want to meet sorry”and be straight they get all aggressive
How can I make my rejections more pleasant ?
"
As a guy who does solo meets, I'd honestly rather just have a lady block me or just not respond rather than respond no thank you. I don't take it personally and I move on. She doesn't need to explain herself and I'm not gonna message her any further.
But that's me, not the rest of the male population on this site.
So just block and leave it at that. You don't owe people explanation's.
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Quite happy (well you know what I mean,) to get "sorry, but your not what I/we are after". Being blocked then actually helps ME as well, as them as nobody's time will be wasted in future searches.
But I don't get upset by just a block either as I know I haven't upset them, because I pay attention to a profile. Messaging takes time so I understand why they might not . I know I haven't been rude etc, so it's all good.
I have had a couple of occasions where women have called me disgusting for being bi and wanting to meet. (Why they are shocked that bi blokes might want to meet single women is beyond me)
I blocked them. |
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"How can I reject someone in the most pleasant way possible so I don’t get abusive messages back?
I don’t think ignoring is the best way to reject guys but if I say “I don’t want to meet sorry”and be straight they get all aggressive
How can I make my rejections more pleasant ?
"
The best way is not to reply, because as soon as you reply they'll forever be able to override your filters, your just asking for trouble
The site FAQs are clear in that no reply means no thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just write "Thank you but no" and if they are not to your liking, block them. No harm done and no abuse received. If they do abuse you then always report them. x |
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Always reply politely “sorry but not interested “ if they choose to keep messaging i usually reply in an apathetic cba kind of way even if they give me abuse I’ve never blocked anyone, and they usually end up blocking me which is fine because I didn’t want to talk to them anyway |
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This shouldn’t even be a thing but it is. A really shit thing about this site is peoples responses to being told no.
I don’t apologise anymore we’ve been here a long time and it gets so mind numbing. I simply say “your not what we are looking for, happy fabbing” to nice messages, if they continue to respond in a non polite way I just block. Also if their first message is anything other than well thought out I block. |
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I block too. So many chancers do not pay a site supporter fee and think they can message again in a while.
Blocking is not rude or cruel, it is just a way of making the site work better for yourself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have been turned down many a time whether it be a no reply or a polite no thank you, my response to those who do politely decline is a “thank for the response I hope you find what you are looking for” then I forget about it.
I have never understood getting arsey about it all. |
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Surely a lack of reply is a simple way of showing lack of interest?
Ok I’m speaking mainly from my experiences on certain dating sites, but if someone doesn’t reply I assume they don’t want to connect, and that’s fine. Maybe I’m just one of the decent guys who gets nowhere in life because I’m not pushy or arrogant. But I’m happy just being me |
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"I have been turned down many a time whether it be a no reply or a polite no thank you, my response to those who do politely decline is a “thank for the response I hope you find what you are looking for” then I forget about it.
I have never understood getting arsey about it all. "
Not complaining but when I get the response "I hope you find what you are looking for" I cringe.
Who says I am looking for something? Maybe I found it already |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have been turned down many a time whether it be a no reply or a polite no thank you, my response to those who do politely decline is a “thank for the response I hope you find what you are looking for” then I forget about it.
I have never understood getting arsey about it all.
Not complaining but when I get the response "I hope you find what you are looking for" I cringe.
Who says I am looking for something? Maybe I found it already "
Touché |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A no thank you and a block is best for me. As i then no longer see any updates in the future and mistakenly message again. Much simpler for everyone. To be offended at a no is either a sign of a big ego,or desperation. Which isn't an attractive quality in any one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A no thank you and a block is best for me. As i then no longer see any updates in the future and mistakenly message again. Much simpler for everyone. To be offended at a no is either a sign of a big ego,or desperation. Which isn't an attractive quality in any one. "
I’m offended at no and have an enormous ego
I wouldn’t take it out at the person on the other end though its just not fair and what does it do to me? |
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"How can I reject someone in the most pleasant way possible so I don’t get abusive messages back?
I don’t think ignoring is the best way to reject guys but if I say “I don’t want to meet sorry”and be straight they get all aggressive
How can I make my rejections more pleasant ?
"
Its not how you deliver it its how they recieve it...don't worry to much about it..your well within your rights to say no thankyou and site rules do suggest that if it a message is ignored then to take it as a polite no...don't think to much on it honey xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I just say "thanks, but no, thanks" or similar, and usually block them after. That stops any more messages, and stops us from wasting each other's time."
This works perfectly. Anything else leaves room for debate. |
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"How can I reject someone in the most pleasant way possible so I don’t get abusive messages back?
I don’t think ignoring is the best way to reject guys but if I say “I don’t want to meet sorry”and be straight they get all aggressive
How can I make my rejections more pleasant ?
"
It says more about them that guys should be so insecure as to react in such a way.
One does wonder though that if they react like that at a distance how they react in a real, one-to-one interaction. Maybe that's why they are on their own? |
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"How can I reject someone in the most pleasant way possible so I don’t get abusive messages back?
I don’t think ignoring is the best way to reject guys but if I say “I don’t want to meet sorry”and be straight they get all aggressive
How can I make my rejections more pleasant ?
"
“Not for me, sorry!” Is all you need to do |
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"How can I reject someone in the most pleasant way possible so I don’t get abusive messages back?
I don’t think ignoring is the best way to reject guys but if I say “I don’t want to meet sorry”and be straight they get all aggressive
How can I make my rejections more pleasant ?
"
Just block |
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Sorry that you are getting abusive replies.
When ever Im lucky enough to get a 'No thank you', i always reply thanking them for taking the trouble to let me knowand make a note in the notes section reminding myself that Im not their type.
I really appreciate the rejection as
I know that I'm not under consideration.
If an abusive reply was recieved in my inbox, i would reply with 'It looks like I had a lucky escape' and then block.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I guess some people can't take rejection but at least you have the courtesy to actual reply with a 'thanks but no thanks'. Most ghost or simply ignore/block.
What a shame the OP has to even ask the question...... |
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"One does wonder though that if they react like that at a distance how they react in a real, one-to-one interaction. Maybe that's why they are on their own?"
You'll probably find that many are keyboard warriors who wouldn't say boo to a goose.
It's a shame people have to block after sending a no thanks message, as although you may not be suited for those of us who aren't abusive we then loose being able to appreciate that person's profile. |
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My cut and paste is, "you're profile isn't for me thank you. I hope you find what you're looking for."
If someone is going to be abusive and not take it well, they will be abusive and not take it well regardless of your reply. That's what the block button is for |
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