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what makes a message stand out
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Need your help fabbers,
I know couples and single fems get hundreds of messages from single guys.
I find it very hard to put a message together(takes a long time and spelling ect) as I am dyslexic and find i am better meeting face to face. The problem I am finding is my messages are not standing out to get a meet. So what am asking is what do couple and fems look for in a message. I know people don't like in the subject line hi or fancy meeting ect.
Many advice would be very much appreciated.
John xx |
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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago
Durham |
Make it easy to reply to. Ask a couple of questions about things in their profile, and tell them enough about yourself that they can find something interesting to ask you about.
i’m sure I’ve seen people mention a club in Swindon, might be worth trying there? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP the first thing anyone will see when you message is the black silhouette instead of a decent pro pic.
You’ve fallen at the 1st hurdle, they are unlikely even to read your message.
Viv |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP the first thing anyone will see when you message is the black silhouette instead of a decent pro pic.
You’ve fallen at the 1st hurdle, they are unlikely even to read your message.
Viv"
*profile, not pro. |
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"Need your help fabbers,
I know couples and single fems get hundreds of messages from single guys.
I find it very hard to put a message together(takes a long time and spelling ect) as I am dyslexic and find i am better meeting face to face. The problem I am finding is my messages are not standing out to get a meet. So what am asking is what do couple and fems look for in a message. I know people don't like in the subject line hi or fancy meeting ect.
Many advice would be very much appreciated.
John xx"
Firstly a face pic on your profile helps - it’s the first thing people see. Secondly pics on your profile.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP the first thing anyone will see when you message is the black silhouette instead of a decent pro pic.
You’ve fallen at the 1st hurdle, they are unlikely even to read your message.
Viv"
Exactly this. For myself and many others it's an automatic delete if all this is is a silhouette. You don't have to put a face picture up if you're not comfortable with doing that but even a fully clothed full length selfie will garner you more likely to get a response than nothing at all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Exactly this. For myself and many others it's an automatic delete if all this is is a silhouette. You don't have to put a face picture up if you're not comfortable with doing that but even a fully clothed full length selfie will garner you more likely to get a response than nothing at all. "
Yep. Effort in, reward out! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm on here mostly for chat and socials.
I would meet the right people if we had a connection,if I don't it doesn't matter...my advice is don't take the site to seriously just be yourself.
Far to many people on here |
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"Need your help fabbers,
I know couples and single fems get hundreds of messages from single guys.
I find it very hard to put a message together(takes a long time and spelling ect) as I am dyslexic and find i am better meeting face to face. The problem I am finding is my messages are not standing out to get a meet. So what am asking is what do couple and fems look for in a message. I know people don't like in the subject line hi or fancy meeting ect.
Many advice would be very much appreciated.
John xx"
For us it is a number of things and in no particular order.:-
Have they read our profile? That will be quite clear by the message as a whole.
No one liners, text speak, messages entitled or start with ‘hey’, awful spelling or no punctuation.
Pictures.
No rudeness or crass messages, trying to engage us in conversation.
All of the above will at least catch our attention and illicit a reply even if just a polite ‘no thanks’.
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A lot of people use a blank profile pic as an easy filter / delete
So something as little as adding a profile pic rather than the sillohette will at least get you over that first hurdle
It doesn't have to be identifying it can be clothed head cropped etc |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
I never know what makes a message to stand out. It could be title, who it is from , is the recipient looking for someone to talk to, is it about a forthcoming social or club meet.
People may want to look at your profile, follow your veris etc |
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"Make it easy to reply to. Ask a couple of questions about things in their profile, and tell them enough about yourself that they can find something interesting to ask you about.
i’m sure I’ve seen people mention a club in Swindon, might be worth trying there? "
Thats great advice thanks
There are two and ment to be very good from what I here but work very long shifts so not had the opportunity as yet but on my bucket list ?? xx |
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"Not having a profile picture is probably stopping you stand out more than your messages."
Thanks for your advice I will get one on but have to be very careful with the job I do so might be a body shot. |
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"Make it easy to reply to. Ask a couple of questions about things in their profile, and tell them enough about yourself that they can find something interesting to ask you about.
i’m sure I’ve seen people mention a club in Swindon, might be worth trying there?
Thats great advice thanks
There are two and ment to be very good from what I here but work very long shifts so not had the opportunity as yet but on my bucket list ?? xx"
Playing away without your Partners knowledge will put many off |
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A lot for us is how people put their personality across. That I know isn't easy (especially without writing war and peace and sending everyone to sleep). But we've had in the past some lovely messages that seem to jist manage this and caught our attention. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You have 5 public pictures and they’re all of your cock and you have no profile picture.
You could write a sonnet worthy of Shakespeare in your message but we’d delete it unread. |
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"Need your help fabbers,
I know couples and single fems get hundreds of messages from single guys.
I find it very hard to put a message together(takes a long time and spelling ect) as I am dyslexic and find i am better meeting face to face. The problem I am finding is my messages are not standing out to get a meet. So what am asking is what do couple and fems look for in a message. I know people don't like in the subject line hi or fancy meeting ect.
Many advice would be very much appreciated.
John xx"
This totally resonates. I am dyslexic and on my single profile (single on here before I met Mrs Misfit) I know how hard it is to get replies. Plus I'm also a John. I like to give a good message but because of my dyslexia composing a message is just so long winded and draining. So it's so disheartening when you put all that effort in and rarely get a reply.
I don't think the online world is our freind. That's why I started going to clubs as a single guy and why we as a couple rarely arrange anything off here. We tend to use clubs and events to meet new people. It's far more easier for to use my voice, smile and personality than it is to use a keyboard (especially when you have a wonderful vocabulary but can't spell half the words you use). Plus it's a far better way the suss out the people your meeting without spending hours messaging back and forth towards what may be a difficult outcome.
If however you just seeking to meet new people on fab then from experience I haven't got much advice but to continue to put your best foot forward and hang in there. Apart from that people often look at profile picture first and often make a decision if to read the message on that. So make sure you have a great profile picture. Some will then veiw a profile before or after reading the message. So the quality of your profile is super important. I know it seems unfair because knocking out amessage involves so much more effort to us that for many others. But it is the nature of beast. From experience it is often banging your head against a brick wall. But what other option do you have, apart from give up? And hopefully in the end it will pay off. Some of my messages paid off and I've met some great people and great meets as a single guy and meet Mrs Misfit on here. I always of the veiw that if I send an unsolicited message to someone they owe me nothing back, including their time. Which I stand by, so you just have to take a no response or delete on the chin.
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There is quite a few reasons that you might not be getting anywhere and it's probably not the msg itself. As other people have said its alot to do with your profile..however it kinda contradicts what your saying as you have said youv met some lovely couples amd still do...so that's a bit confusing. Also the fact that it says you can't accommodate. Most couples amd single fems will assume it because your married/attached. |
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