FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Thank you married men!
Thank you married men!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I would like to say thank you to the married chaps who are here without their partners consent who put this on their profile. It lets folk make informed decisions about wether to get involved or not so thanks. 
Theres always reasons why people do what they do, and i’m not here to pick over the bones of that, but by putting it on your profile, it just makes it easier to let people know where they stand. So again thank you! |
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It's upto you to do your homework and ask if people are merried/attatched or not .
Whether you get a truthful answer is a different matter but I've saw many who have displayed verifications from the same guys I've met & were told they were married or atratched proving some either don't ask or are getting lied to.
Also the site is full of people who think it's okay to send abusive messages to people who display it on their profile & thats a reason why many don't |
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To be fair, we wouldn't have a clue if someone was married or not so that isn't something that sways us really, its their marriage not ours.
One that we have found a lot is when we get a message off a bi guy , each to their own but it isn't for us and when we say sorry we don't play with bi guys they say they aren't and their profile is changed quickly!! X |
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"I would like to say thank you to the married chaps who are here without their partners consent who put this on their profile. It lets folk make informed decisions about wether to get involved or not so thanks.
Theres always reasons why people do what they do, and i’m not here to pick over the bones of that, but by putting it on your profile, it just makes it easier to let people know where they stand. So again thank you! "
100% this!  |
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I like it when there up front about it from the start. It's when they say they are single and then the tell tale signs start to appear ,. Only message during day, here nothing from then on a night or a weekend ,can't accommodate, can't book hotel on there credit card ?
It's so obvious and they still deny it annoys me x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would like to say thank you to the married chaps who are here without their partners consent who put this on their profile. It lets folk make informed decisions about wether to get involved or not so thanks.
Theres always reasons why people do what they do, and i’m not here to pick over the bones of that, but by putting it on your profile, it just makes it easier to let people know where they stand. So again thank you! "
agreed. Thanks! Xx |
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By *rad670Man
over a year ago
South Lakes |
How refreshing and thank you OP. I state my position on my profile and say that I'm married just like half the single men on here, at least by being up front when I do get a message it's an informed one from the start, it does limit who will still contact you but it's a good start when you know non judgemental people are interested in you. |
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Also, thanks to those ladies who are honest about being attached too. It's not for me to judge your decisions but your honesty allows potential playmates to make an informed decision about whether or not to play with you. |
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"I would like to say thank you to the married chaps who are here without their partners consent who put this on their profile. It lets folk make informed decisions about wether to get involved or not so thanks.
Theres always reasons why people do what they do, and i’m not here to pick over the bones of that, but by putting it on your profile, it just makes it easier to let people know where they stand. So again thank you! "
Do not forget the married gals saying that not many on here who state they are cheating on there partners. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That's really good to hear, I like to make it clear from the start, it's not for everyone, I usually ask, are married men a possibility? Some reply, no thanks and some delete. Thanks for your refreshing non judgemental comments all round. |
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"Couldn't agree more.
There will be a 'thank you to those who are honest about being bi' next lol. Bloody 'fab straight' lads hang your heads in shame lol "
If I had a pound for every 'straight' men that asked ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honesty is best...I detest it when married men trick peeps that they are single...it's not nice. Be honest. Some peeps just don't want to be part of a cheating game. I was tricked before...he was pretending to be single but he was actually cheating on his Wife. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I would like to say thank you to the married chaps who are here without their partners consent who put this on their profile. It lets folk make informed decisions about wether to get involved or not so thanks.
Theres always reasons why people do what they do, and i’m not here to pick over the bones of that, but by putting it on your profile, it just makes it easier to let people know where they stand. So again thank you!
Do not forget the married gals saying that not many on here who state they are cheating on there partners."
There are indeed married ladies, but due to some gender bias quirk thing, people don’t get as upset about ladies being married and cheating on their partner. In fact much of the time they're sought after. Men on here get wayyy worse stick about it. As with anything giving people the chance to make informed decisions about things is a grand thing to do. |
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By *j_cambsMan
over a year ago
near Ely, Cambs |
Although it's generally assumed that married = cheating, it isn't always the case, so I suspect the "permission" element is actually more important that the married bit.
I've always mentioned that I'm married on my profile, but after reading this thread, I've just elaborated on it to include that I'm playing without permission.  |
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"It's upto you to do your homework and ask if people are merried/attatched or not .
Whether you get a truthful answer is a different matter but I've saw many who have displayed verifications from the same guys I've met & were told they were married or atratched proving some either don't ask or are getting lied to.
Also the site is full of people who think it's okay to send abusive messages to people who display it on their profile & thats a reason why many don't "
I can only ask the question. It’s not on me to do any homework or prove/ disprove anything.
Vile people will always lie (both sexes!) but unless I never have sex with a single man again, as a single woman there’s not much else I can do about it 
People that go out of the way to give anyone abuse for any reason should be reported - what a very sad life!
X |
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"Although it's generally assumed that married = cheating, it isn't always the case, so I suspect the "permission" element is actually more important that the married bit.
I've always mentioned that I'm married on my profile, but after reading this thread, I've just elaborated on it to include that I'm playing without permission. "
I've had mine like that for a while
A mixed bag of responses to it I must say. But to be expected i guess. |
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By *rmdMan
over a year ago
chesterfield |
"I would like to say thank you to the married chaps who are here without their partners consent who put this on their profile. It lets folk make informed decisions about wether to get involved or not so thanks.
Theres always reasons why people do what they do, and i’m not here to pick over the bones of that, but by putting it on your profile, it just makes it easier to let people know where they stand. So again thank you! "
You women would always know one way or another no point hiding the facts 
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"I feel this way about people who prefer bareback sex too. If people are able to be upfront it allows everyone to make an informed decision "
Maybe it should be an option for preferences.
Bareback sex
Meeting without partners knowledge
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I feel this way about people who prefer bareback sex too. If people are able to be upfront it allows everyone to make an informed decision
Maybe it should be an option for preferences.
Bareback sex
Good thinking
Meeting without partners knowledge
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it's better to tell people if you think it might go somewhere so many fake profiles very few ladies and couples get to the point of actually turning up anyway, happy chatting to fakes as opposed to getting shit for being married of every Tom Dick and Harry including the fakes ! |
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"I would like to say thank you to the married chaps who are here without their partners consent who put this on their profile. It lets folk make informed decisions about wether to get involved or not so thanks.
Theres always reasons why people do what they do, and i’m not here to pick over the bones of that, but by putting it on your profile, it just makes it easier to let people know where they stand. So again thank you! "
Not judging is a fabulous and rare thing |
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Upfront is the best policy...wish they had options so you can say on ur profile everything...ie..were married and meet alone....I'm married and partner doesn't know etc etc etc...and then allow search options for these... |
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By *xhib12Man
over a year ago
Blyth |
"Upfront is the best policy...wish they had options so you can say on ur profile everything...ie..were married and meet alone....I'm married and partner doesn't know etc etc etc...and then allow search options for these..."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would like to say thank you to the married chaps who are here without their partners consent who put this on their profile. It lets folk make informed decisions about wether to get involved or not so thanks.
Theres always reasons why people do what they do, and i’m not here to pick over the bones of that, but by putting it on your profile, it just makes it easier to let people know where they stand. So again thank you! "
I like to be up front from the outset. Most women I’ve had sex with have known I’m married and playing away. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Couldn't agree more.
There will be a 'thank you to those who are honest about being bi' next lol. Bloody 'fab straight' lads hang your heads in shame lol "
i dont hide the fact am straight and like men.so why dont you 'fab straight'guys admit that you like men too? |
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I've always been upfront about being married - it's in the first line of my profile, and as some people actually prefer to play with married/attached males, on occasion it's been advantageous...
....though doubtless many more will have avoided/blocked/ignored me precisely because I'm married and 'playing away'! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have it on our profile that my husband is looking for nsa fun with another woman which I'm completely open about but not sure if some women think its my hubby messaging them even though we are a couple profile and both have access to it. |
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"OFFS so what? We are now thanking people for being the very basic of honesty? Yeah, okay, what the fuck ever  "
My thoughts exactly.
If you don't start from a base of honesty things soon crumble.
Everyone should be able to make informed decisions. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm married my profile states this. I've been her 10 years plus and consider myself a swinger not a player or adulterous person. My wife is 100 percent career driven and I guess my best friend but has no interest in sex.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm married my profile states this. I've been her 10 years plus and consider myself a swinger not a player or adulterous person. My wife is 100 percent career driven and I guess my best friend but has no interest in sex.
"
Genuinely curious as you say you consider yourself not to be adulterous, is that because your wife is fully aware and supportive of you meeting your sexual needs outside of your marriage?
If so then if you have agreed permission / her blessing then there is no adultery taking place.
We also appreciate it when men and women are upfront on thier profile about playing without permission as we can avoid both.
We state on our profile we don't meet anybody cheating (having both been devasted by been cheated on in past relationships). Still we get many guys messaging who once enough red flags pop up admit they are here cheating on their partner.
We know a lovely swinging couple who had an MMF meet with a single guy who lied to them about been married and cheating. His wife found his fab account on his phone and in her hurt and confusion turned most of her vemon onto the couple he lied to to meet. She had comprising pictures of the couple, their home address and proceeded to make their lives hell. It took the police and injunctions to finally stop the chaos. Sadly one of the couples jobs was serverly compromised at that point, not to mention the betrayed wife informed the couples family of the situation.
Why would any honest, loving couple knowingly pick a married guy cheating to play with and risk that type of drama and devastation? There are tons of genuinely single guys out there to meet drama and relative risk free.
So yes we really appreciate it when guys and ladies put if they are here to cheat clearly on their profile.
Incidentally would that couple have deserved what happened to them if they had known upfront that the guy was married, looking to cheat and they decided to play with him anyway?
KJ
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Our view on this is if they have no respect for their own partner (which they obviously don't) then they aren't exactly going to have any for randomers they hope to meet on here.
Avoid like the plague! |
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By *rFetMan
over a year ago
Clacton On Sea |
As a Married Swinger with consent to play Solo (Wife has no interest or desire to Swing but is happy for me to), I from the outset made this clear. I suspect this has a negative effect in that it's very 'quiet' for me on here but honesty is best. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thankyou Selina.
I have no problems being upfront about it. It’s much easier to be honest on here rather than have to make up stories and lie. If I lie about my height it will get found out, and same as if I lie about my marital status.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just picked up on this thread.....It has been said already, but I would like to add my thanks for the positivness of the thread.
We married men who are open about their situation, do get alot of "bad press" and those are the breaks, but most of us have our reasons to want to be able to express and side of lives that is hidden away - equally most us are not looking for "love" we have that, we just looking for that missing link/excitement or adventure in life
Thank you OP  |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
Part of me though thinks the message is I’m lying to the person I promised not to lie to or cheat on but I’m not lying to you, complete stranger on the Internet I’m trying to fuck, but I get that each situation is unique and complex. So for me it’s good you are honest abs upfront (married women) , but not for me, I wouldn’t trust anything you said. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just picked up on this thread.....It has been said already, but I would like to add my thanks for the positivness of the thread.
We married men who are open about their situation, do get alot of "bad press" and those are the breaks, but most of us have our reasons to want to be able to express and side of lives that is hidden away - equally most us are not looking for "love" we have that, we just looking for that missing link/excitement or adventure in life
Thank you OP "
Yes this is exactly it for me. |
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"Yes thanks, I appreciate we aren't to everyone's taste but I'd rather be upfront and honest. And yes she does know, she took one of the pics on my profile in full knowledge of where it was going."
If she knows then I doubt anyone will have an issue with that, it's the ones who are playing behind their partners backs is what the majority want to avoid. |
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I think it does help that u say u are or aren't,I kind of had a thing for married men for a while,kind of found it more easier and horny. U got a more straightforward answer from them,well some of them. |
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If they are married and they tell me the wife knows.Before a meet I tell them let me talk to your wife and I will ask them myself.
Not met one yet that has let me speak to his wife so no meet simples… |
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Don't really care if they are married or not.
If it was some form of relationship I was after, then yes, having a wife and kids at home would be an issue.
Sex in a club or party, is just that to me.
Only time it has made an impact is when they discuss their wife especially when they make barbed remarks about why she doesn't like swinging.
Then it's a swerve.
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By *abluesbabyMan
over a year ago
Gibraltar/Cheshire/London |
I think its essential to be open and honest. Cheating leads to issues and problems and as the tears flow, tempers rage the lawyers get rich.
Be honest. Always. And if you shouldn't be here then do the right thing and don't be here. But that is always of course up to you. |
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In a place where you can be upfront and open about what your looking for and generally never get judged you simply don't need to lie because it's more easily achievable without that.
In your profile you could lay it all on the line eg. your married,that your wife doesn't know,you hate children, enjoy seeing animals in distress, lacklustre in bed, im not racist but, kick old ladies walking sticks from underneath them as you jog past, listen to U2, shout your own name when you cum......and there will be someone for you. Lying therefore makes you look weak and piss poor and desperate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thanks OP, refreshingly honest and open thread about us married men playing without the other half knowing.
I’ve stated it quite clearly in the opening part of my profile. It’s important for people to have all the information and allow them to make an informed choice.
Besides, if you can’t be honest on a website like this, then FAB is probably going to be quite a miserable experience for you.
Jack |
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"OFFS so what? We are now thanking people for being the very basic of honesty? Yeah, okay, what the fuck ever "
I've not even read through the entire thread as this was exactly my thought along with 'thank you for being honest about your dishonesty'  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OFFS so what? We are now thanking people for being the very basic of honesty? Yeah, okay, what the fuck ever "
Yeah cos it seems no matter what on here, there isn't much honesty around, not only about infidelity!
How about ghosting, not turning up for meets etc....Which is in my mind the basics! |
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There are so many self righteous people about who presumably never lie/fib/coerce their partners, family, friends, colleagues or even bosses to get what they want lol.
Thankfully there are those who accept that we all make our own decisions based on our own lives and not some fairytale nonsense in which nobody ever lies or misleads anyone for any reason whatsoever.
If a guy is honest enough to admit he's married here it takes some balls and that should be applauded not criticised. That way the judgemental many can make their choice and those of us who understand that people seek extramarital fun for all sorts of reasons - some of which are perfectly understandable - can do likewise.
We'll happily meet married guys if we accept their situation as explained to us. We can't do more than that and aren't going to punish ourselves for not having the divine insight and morals some here obviously believe they're blessed with. We're pretty good at differentiating between a pack of lies and a geunine situation and will make our own judgements regarding who to meet or avoid without any reference to the self-righteous.
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Whatever reason they have or say for being on here could quite easily be more lies.
If they are more than happy to lie to their own partner then of course they can lie to random people on here.
Don't trust them at all.
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"There are so many self righteous people about who presumably never lie/fib/coerce their partners, family, friends, colleagues or even bosses to get what they want lol.
Thankfully there are those who accept that we all make our own decisions based on our own lives and not some fairytale nonsense in which nobody ever lies or misleads anyone for any reason whatsoever.
If a guy is honest enough to admit he's married here it takes some balls and that should be applauded not criticised. That way the judgemental many can make their choice and those of us who understand that people seek extramarital fun for all sorts of reasons - some of which are perfectly understandable - can do likewise.
We'll happily meet married guys if we accept their situation as explained to us. We can't do more than that and aren't going to punish ourselves for not having the divine insight and morals some here obviously believe they're blessed with. We're pretty good at differentiating between a pack of lies and a geunine situation and will make our own judgements regarding who to meet or avoid without any reference to the self-righteous.
"
Wow. I don't think that not agreeing with someone cheating on their husband or wife makes someone self righteous.
It may not be that important to you, but to some people it's quite a big deal, particularally those who have been on the receiving end of deception in the past.
I wouldn't say anything negative to those doing it, but I just personally wouldn't want to be involved in something that could potentially distress and upset another person in the world.
Does that mean I think I'm perfect? Absolutely not. Does that mean I think I don't tell lies? Also absolutely not. But do I try to live my life as honestly as possible and ensure I don't tell lies on purpose in order to deceive someone, that would result in hurt and upset. Absolutely, but it doesn't mean I'm 'self-righteous' it just means my opinion in it differs from yours. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Always better to be open and honest on the subject in my opinion.
There are many reasons why someone might be playing without consent I wouldn’t judge but it’s good to know in advance.
It’s not everyone’s thing and some will choose for an equal number of different reasons not to meet someone playing without consent and again they shouldn’t be judged
Boundaries are boundaries and should always be respected
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why tell lies especially on here "
Now that's the six million dollar question, but people do, for all sorts of reasons!
I don't believe for one moment, some people haven't stretched the truth over certain situations on this site, just to get out of an uncomfortable situation. No matter on what level they perceive it. |
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My most shocking experience was with a woman who I met and she and I were busy one afternoon when her daughter came home early whist she was gushing everywhere! She had dead locked the front door and her daughter was knocking on the door to get in. Her husband was ringing as well as the daughter had rang him. She was telling her husband lies and said to me to pretend I was measuring the house for new carpets!! So whilst men are often seen as the ones cheating women are not always free from blame..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The title of the post should thank married people but the OP chose men, her post, her choice
Is she thanking people or using it as a block list as I'm sure many reading this post will be
Imho |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thanks to all you ladies for telling me you’re married. I was hoping to meet the love of my life to spend eternity with on a swingers site but you have saved me that heartache.
Also allows me to think you’re a lowlife cheat & feel all superior. Thank you ladies one and all. |
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By *hynot3Man
over a year ago
Middlesbrough |
"It's upto you to do your homework and ask if people are merried/attatched or not .
Whether you get a truthful answer is a different matter but I've saw many who have displayed verifications from the same guys I've met & were told they were married or atratched proving some either don't ask or are getting lied to.
Also the site is full of people who think it's okay to send abusive messages to people who display it on their profile & thats a reason why many don't "
Never ok to send abusive messages….these people should be named and shamed and called out over it IMO |
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
"Honesty is the best policy, I do not want any to get the wrong idea or be ‘tricked’ into something they are not happy with.
Mr HH"
Agreed, even if they might be a tad dishonest at home. But we are all adults here.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I found the OP quite judgy while dressing it up as a “well done you”...
Not that I give a fiddlers fuck what anyone who doesn’t know me thinks of me. I’d meet loads more people pug & face to face anyway.  |
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