FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Why do you 'wink' somebody?
Why do you 'wink' somebody?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
This, I agree with  |
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By * and BCouple
over a year ago
Durham |
It is beyond us why people wink us, we have on our profile that we don't even check them. For the exact reason OP says. We used to reply but 99% of the time we never got a reply. We like a thought out message, it shows people can put an effort into what they do on here. To many fantasists   |
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To grab their attention… if they wink back I send a message. Have had two couples profile do that then read the message and not reply. Makes me wonder why they winked back in the first place but then again people are odd like that so I don’t dwell and just move on |
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That for the thoughts all. I have used wink I see that somebody’s with whom I have chatted or met is online to give them the option of chatting or not (they might be chatting to A. N. Other so it is less I interruptive (if that is a word)).
OP |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is beyond us why people wink us, we have on our profile that we don't even check them. For the exact reason OP says. We used to reply but 99% of the time we never got a reply. We like a thought out message, it shows people can put an effort into what they do on here. To many fantasists "
Totally agree.
I can totally understand why many consider winks to be lazy and I very rarely send inks these days - sometimes if there's a winking thread in the forum I might
I find a message is a much better way to express interest - because you can pick up specific things.
I have had winks before, and like the OP says, when you respond with a message you get ignored.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wink to show interest,but rarely get a reply,but always answer any messages or winks. But don’t get it when someone winks you,you reply with wink or message and then nothing. |
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By *eefdoddusCouple
over a year ago
Scottish Borders |
We get winks from friends if they fancy a chat just to see if we're actually online. Fab often shows us on when we aren't. If its from a couple we haven't spoken to before we always say hi back.
Get lots from single guys who haven't even read our profile. They get deleted. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I barely look at my winks. Out of curiosity I looked at them yesterday and noticed there was about 20 of them lol. I just deleted them. I much prefer a message, that's what gets a conversation going, not a wink x |
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We use winks as a way of testing the water. Having a wink unreciprocated is a lot easier than having a message ignored. If we get a wink back then we know there's at least a basic attraction all round to build from  |
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By *rad670Man
over a year ago
South Lakes |
"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
I agree with this totally, once a wink back has been received it's like a sign they have looked at your profile and saying OK send me an interesting message, much better than sending a blind message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
Ah so THIS is the rule! Dam I thought it was a hint for a message or connection… don’t know I was supposed to wink back
#nowiknow |
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By *dquestCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough |
"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
Agree with this post. |
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Like a number of you I send a wink to express interest. Quite often I see a profile that interests me so I send a wink and if they wink back I take it that they're interested so I then send a message. |
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By *otgirl32Woman
over a year ago
Ashton Under Lyne |
"I recently received a wink from a couple but my follow up message was ignored.
What is the point of winking if you are not saying 'hello'?"
I wink at a person(s) if I look at the profile and/or pictures and see myself naked in bed having sex, it's pure and simple. Doesn't mean I am GOING to have sex, just means I find them attractive enough to think in those terms. I then expect a nice message in return. Sometimes it's a great message and years down then line they're still sex partners. More often it's a "Wanna fuck" type of half a liner then they wonder why they didn't get a reply. Yes it IS a bit arrogant of me to not write the first "nice" message fully admit to that.
X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Like others have said, I see a wink as a way of saying I’m interested in you if my profile is of interest wink back.
It saves writing a long and detailed message that just sits there unread or just gets deleted, which is pretty rude, but then again I guess some get zillions of messages. |
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Like most people here, I send winks to express interest. If I get a wink back, I view that as a cue to send a message.
However, I'm aware that some people on get so many winks they bulk delete them without even looking, so it's not as reliable a gauge of potential interest as I would like.
I always check my winks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We use and check winks, it's a very instant way to send a signal there may be interest there. If really interested though I will message. I am guilty of accidentally winking on occasion though too.
We get winks people don't follow up on I don't read too much into it.
Tabitha x |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
We wink as a way of gauging interest.
As I said in an earlier thread about winking it frustrating when somebody winks and then ignores your follow up message but hey it ua fab who knows why people do things. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I send winks as a sort of catching you eye across a busy room thing. Let's someone know I'm interested in what I have seen in there profile. If they wink or message back then great, the ice is broken. I generally always try to reply back to winks I receive. Some people just find it difficult to send the first message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I recently received a wink from a couple but my follow up message was ignored.
What is the point of winking if you are not saying 'hello'?"
I can understand the frustration...
but maybe they changed their mind!
It happens I'm afraid.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hellothis  "
Exactly this |
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I state in my bio that I don't respond to winks so I assume that when I do get one it's someone just showing appreciation for my profile... Which as always good!
Couples or singles will usually reach out via message if they're interested or have a question.... Hopefully anyway - otherwise I've missed some opportunities!  |
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"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
This works for us also   |
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"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
I agreee entirely with this |
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"Blokes love a wink - esp when 95% of messages get ignored. Single women / couples hate it because they want to be wooed, not gawped at. Am i right!?"
I'm guessing you are right. From a single blokes view it's easier that writing a decent personal message that's ignored or even worse not read. It's disappointing they aren't used more, I'm sure there could be some way that messages could only be exchanged if two parties had winked each other. Would cut out a lot of time wasting for people like me and would stop a lot of the 'hows you' or 'fancy a fuck' type messages that couples and single women complain about |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's happened to me a fair bit.
I'm not a big fan of winks for this reason. You never know the exact reason why they've winked, and when you message to ask, you get no reply. |
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"I recently received a wink from a couple but my follow up message was ignored.
What is the point of winking if you are not saying 'hello'?"
Happened a few times to me too and from single ladies
Fustrating |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wink to let the person/s that I am interested, as a BBW I'm not to everyone's taste so that gives them a chance just to look and not feel pressured to answer a message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Blokes love a wink - esp when 95% of messages get ignored. Single women / couples hate it because they want to be wooed, not gawped at. Am i right!?"
Nope I met a FB through winking first |
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"Blokes love a wink - esp when 95% of messages get ignored. Single women / couples hate it because they want to be wooed, not gawped at. Am i right!?
Nope I met a FB through winking first "
He must be in your area , lucky him .. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I state in my bio that I don't respond to winks so I assume that when I do get one it's someone just showing appreciation for my profile... Which as always good!
Couples or singles will usually reach out via message if they're interested or have a question.... Hopefully anyway - otherwise I've missed some opportunities! "
Far more likely that they didn’t bother to read the profile in my experience…….
I almost never respond to or even look at winks. Still think they’re a lazy way to make contact.
I do always respond to messages that go beyond the standard one-liners though even if we’re not interested. Think it’s quite rude not to respond if someone has clearly made some effort to read the profile and craft a decent message… |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Blokes love a wink - esp when 95% of messages get ignored. Single women / couples hate it because they want to be wooed, not gawped at. Am i right!?
Nope I met a FB through winking first
He must be in your area , lucky him .."
Yep he was at the time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
Yes, we agree. We do the same |
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"We would wink to show initial interest, if we get a wink back then we will message.
Saves wasting anyones time"
This works for us as well.
If their profile is 100% looking for the same as us then we’ll most likely start with a message.
A wink from us means we’d like to know more. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
Exactly this |
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Was the follow up message unread ?
Couples and singles get inundated with messages.
Wouldn't take it too personally maybe message again in a few weeks or wink back to see if the interest is still there |
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As a guy on here I can spend a lot of time trying to write a decent message of introduction but 9 times outta 10 they ain’t even read.
Winks are probably ignored more but at least if they do venture to my profile it will them show them that I have previously checked them out and liked what I have seen.
Plus some profiles are sooo good that they get a wink just because |
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I dont understand why people turn off the thing where they have viewed your profile.
Who cares if you've had a look?
Problem ive always felt is noone wnats to message first.
Bit silly considering its a social network to make friends. |
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"I dont understand why people turn off the thing where they have viewed your profile.
Who cares if you've had a look?
Problem ive always felt is noone wnats to message first.
Bit silly considering its a social network to make friends. "
I used stealth mode so nobody has to feel uncomfortable about me looking at them. It’s just courtesy.
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"I dont understand why people turn off the thing where they have viewed your profile.
Who cares if you've had a look?
Problem ive always felt is noone wnats to message first.
Bit silly considering its a social network to make friends.
I used stealth mode so nobody has to feel uncomfortable about me looking at them. It’s just courtesy.
"
Not sure whats worse, the feeling of no one looking at your profile and feeling hella ugly
Or what you just said.
Got me thinking
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By *ougie321Man
over a year ago
Milford Haven |
"We would wink to show initial interest, if we get a wink back then we will message.
Saves wasting anyones time
This works for us as well.
If their profile is 100% looking for the same as us then we’ll most likely start with a message.
A wink from us means we’d like to know more. "
Agree with above |
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By *rK MrsJCouple
over a year ago
Kidderminster |
"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
This also why we like winks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We use winks to people we like the look of, and if we receive one back we take it as reciprocal. Then we follow up with a nice message. Winks to us, are like a nice smile across a bar or a club... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
agree with this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I recently received a wink from a couple but my follow up message was ignored.
What is the point of winking if you are not saying 'hello'?"
I have been saying "Hallo" and even much more but not getting any response till now so "Wink" has been created to say that person who send you a Wink is interested about you and would like to have some chat, if you Wink back it means that you interested too and also looking forward for some chat. Than for sure you will receive a msgs from this person.
I don't understand why people don't use it does Winks as they could save many anoing situations. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Winks are a waste of time in my book, hence I don’t reply to them in any form of communication."
It is very nice idea of fast and easy 1st contact actually. |
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By *apnDomMan
over a year ago
London | Belfast |
Winks wouldn't be so useless if "courting" here wouldn't be such a hassle in general. But it is, too high expections and still looking for mister perfect.
I think some people have the wrong expectations...
Anyways. Because of that winks just get ignored because they're "low effort", and the message you send regarding their wink might just be lost among the messages in their inbox. |
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How many who have replied in the negative send a message first and get a reply? Women supposedly getting loads of messages,see an inbox of 250 unread and just delete the lot so whats the point in messaging if you aren't going to bother your arse reading them all?
We send a wink because people are busy and a message can get lost in the wash. If we get a wink we'll wink back if we like the profile and take it from there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Winks wouldn't be so useless if "courting" here wouldn't be such a hassle in general. But it is, too high expections and still looking for mister perfect.
I think some people have the wrong expectations...
Anyways. Because of that winks just get ignored because they're "low effort", and the message you send regarding their wink might just be lost among the messages in their inbox."
I always look at winks and friend requests - like a heads up to view their profile. If after reading theirs it isn't for me. Then no major problem.... Must be other people who do the same! |
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We look at winks and if we like their profile we’ll either wink back or message.
We’ll wink as well just to show interest. Then if they respond with a wink we’ll send a message.
It’s just to show interest. It’s not seen as lazy by us.
K |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wink at people I like the look of, sometimes just because I’d like them to know (e.g. if they’re hundreds of miles away and we’re never likely to meet or I’m clearly not what they want) or the same but also testing the water if there could be some potential. |
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"we often wink to show interest, and if they wink back we follow with a message, saves righting a long message to someone who isnt interested, we find it a good way to say hello"
This! sometimes it works sometimes it doesn’t! |
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"We use winks to people we like the look of, and if we receive one back we take it as reciprocal. Then we follow up with a nice message. Winks to us, are like a nice smile across a bar or a club..."
this |
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