FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > The wife found out!
The wife found out!
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"Anyone has an experience of the partner/spouse of the person you’re playing with texting you “how did you get his/her number and have you met in person?” I just said the questions are for him not for me but I’m curious to hear how you fabsters have dealt with it. Context: I’m a single woman " That's strictly not called swinging. That's called cheating and going behind your back. | |||
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OP if you didn't know said person was in a relationship then its not your problem if you did have to ask yourself how you would feel in the wife/girlfriends position. | |||
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"Erm… have you been on Fab? Is the Pope catholic? How is your reply relevant to my question?" Figure it out!! | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in." That's the problem. The guy can tell you he is single and you believe him but he may be married. Atts he'd eyc and therefore cheating on his own partner with you. Happens all the time. Human nature | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in." It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. | |||
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"I have been in the gf/wife situation: that’s when I chose to be single for the rest of my life! That was 11 years ago, I never looked back. Men can’t keep it in their pants: is that really big news? We all know that. It’s the partner’s job to know what kind of person they are getting in bed with (it goes both ways), and make sure you keep him on a lead after that. I’ve done it, multiple times, until I got tired of having to do it. Women cheat too and I’ve met a few single men who made the same choice as mine, some of them in far more dramatic circumstances. In 2021 relationships are a choice. As for the woman who texted me this morning, I know the agony she’s going through. The oppressive pain in your chest and wondering if you know your partner at all. I hope she gets the right resolve that works for her. As for me, I have thanked the woman my ex cheated on me with, right after asking her to keep him on a tighter leash during the 18 months he harassed me after we broke up. The pain that I felt when I found out, that this woman I don’t know is probably feeling today, is what made me the free woman I am today. I didn’t make this man I’ve never met a cheater. By being here as a single man, he is a cheater. The onus is on him. I’m not the guardian of anyone’s conscience but mine. If their relationship breaks down, I am responsible, she is responsible, Fab is responsible, technology is responsible: we all facilitated the breakdown happening. But he only is guilty. " You have answered your own question as you have experienced this so just be honest with them as much as you'd expect doesn't make you the guilty party just a victim as much as her | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. " Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. That's the problem. The guy can tell you he is single and you believe him but he may be married. Atts he'd eyc and therefore cheating on his own partner with you. Happens all the time. Human nature " Exactly! It is human nature; but there are too many idealists who’d rather believe in fairy tales. | |||
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"I won’t knowingly meet anyone who’s attached because I don’t agree with cheating. I think if a partner contacted me I’d be honest and explain how I met their partner and explain that I thought they were single. I’d have no desire to be complicit in their lie. " this all day for us, and its not normaly hard to spot those who arent single, there is always a give away | |||
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"I won’t knowingly meet anyone who’s attached because I don’t agree with cheating. I think if a partner contacted me I’d be honest and explain how I met their partner and explain that I thought they were single. I’d have no desire to be complicit in their lie. this all day for us, and its not normaly hard to spot those who arent single, there is always a give away" Tell me about it! I have no idea how they manage to keep the double life… | |||
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"I won’t knowingly meet anyone who’s attached because I don’t agree with cheating. I think if a partner contacted me I’d be honest and explain how I met their partner and explain that I thought they were single. I’d have no desire to be complicit in their lie. this all day for us, and its not normaly hard to spot those who arent single, there is always a give away Tell me about it! I have no idea how they manage to keep the double life… " From your experience they don't! | |||
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"Sorry but why should the partner who's being cheated on need to keep their partner on a leash and be aware of who they are sleeping next too. I've been cheated on and I wasn't Aware they was cheating and as for keeping him on a leash that's controlling behaviour, you can't go around controlling your partner into not cheating. " The most obvious answer is so that it doesn’t happen. I’ve been cheated on too, wasn’t aware either until I started putting 2 and 2 together. That’s what I call keeping on a leash: asking yourself the right questions when there are some bizarre patterns. It’s just an expression: I’m not condoning putting trackers on him!! In retrospect, I should have known better and I should have known earlier. He was entirely the guilty one, but yes I do feel responsible for having been blind and gullible at the time. | |||
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"I have been in the gf/wife situation: that’s when I chose to be single for the rest of my life! That was 11 years ago, I never looked back. Men can’t keep it in their pants: is that really big news? We all know that. It’s the partner’s job to know what kind of person they are getting in bed with (it goes both ways), and make sure you keep him on a lead after that. I’ve done it, multiple times, until I got tired of having to do it. Women cheat too and I’ve met a few single men who made the same choice as mine, some of them in far more dramatic circumstances. In 2021 relationships are a choice. As for the woman who texted me this morning, I know the agony she’s going through. The oppressive pain in your chest and wondering if you know your partner at all. I hope she gets the right resolve that works for her. As for me, I have thanked the woman my ex cheated on me with, right after asking her to keep him on a tighter leash during the 18 months he harassed me after we broke up. The pain that I felt when I found out, that this woman I don’t know is probably feeling today, is what made me the free woman I am today. I didn’t make this man I’ve never met a cheater. By being here as a single man, he is a cheater. The onus is on him. I’m not the guardian of anyone’s conscience but mine. If their relationship breaks down, I am responsible, she is responsible, Fab is responsible, technology is responsible: we all facilitated the breakdown happening. But he only is guilty. You have answered your own question as you have experienced this so just be honest with them as much as you'd expect doesn't make you the guilty party just a victim as much as her " I’m really not a victim: I knew he was attached and I’ve never even met the guy. I know there’s nothing I can do about it: it’s for them to sort it out. I only posted my question to hear about other people’s similar stories. They’re coming in my inbox because people are afraid to being judged! It’s a shame. | |||
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"We haven't had this experience but would deal with it exactly as you have and block the number " Cheers | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. " I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. " Edited for spelling 
Men lying is not women's fault...just saying. If men were truthful from day one or even took responsibility for what comes out of their mouth things might be different. | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. That's the problem. The guy can tell you he is single and you believe him but he may be married. Atts he'd eyc and therefore cheating on his own partner with you. Happens all the time. Human nature " This has happened to me. I really liked the guy and as far as I knew we were both unattached and just enjoying ourselves. then one day out of the blue he sent me a message one day saying he needed to tell me something and he understood if I didn't want to talk to him again after he told me. | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. Edited for spelling
Men lying is not women's fault...just saying. If men were truthful from day one or even took responsibility for what comes out of their mouth things might be different."Yes. Thank goodness all of the women on here only speak the truth. | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. " May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. Edited for spelling
Men lying is not women's fault...just saying. If men were truthful from day one or even took responsibility for what comes out of their mouth things might be different."I never said that men’s lying was women’s fault! I’m saying that *choosing to blindly believe that their man wouldn’t lie* is women’s fault. There’s a massive difference! | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. Edited for spelling
Men lying is not women's fault...just saying. If men were truthful from day one or even took responsibility for what comes out of their mouth things might be different.
Yes. Thank goodness all of the women on here only speak the truth. "I made it clear earlier some of my fuckmates have been through the same things. The title is not gender neutral but my OP is. | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. " I think it’s about 5 years. I don’t agree that it’s just the man that’s responsible. The women that helped themselves to my other half, knowing he was cheating were part of the problem. The ‘well I’m single so it’s not my responsibility’ thing doesn’t work for me. If you’re knowingly getting involved with attached men who are cheating then you’re causing hurt to other women intentionally. In my view. | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. " That is exactly what I’m saying!!! It took me 40 years to understand that. | |||
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"I have been in the gf/wife situation: that’s when I chose to be single for the rest of my life! That was 11 years ago, I never looked back. Men can’t keep it in their pants: is that really big news? We all know that. It’s the partner’s job to know what kind of person they are getting in bed with (it goes both ways), and make sure you keep him on a lead after that. I’ve done it, multiple times, until I got tired of having to do it. Women cheat too and I’ve met a few single men who made the same choice as mine, some of them in far more dramatic circumstances. In 2021 relationships are a choice. As for the woman who texted me this morning, I know the agony she’s going through. The oppressive pain in your chest and wondering if you know your partner at all. I hope she gets the right resolve that works for her. As for me, I have thanked the woman my ex cheated on me with, right after asking her to keep him on a tighter leash during the 18 months he harassed me after we broke up. The pain that I felt when I found out, that this woman I don’t know is probably feeling today, is what made me the free woman I am today. I didn’t make this man I’ve never met a cheater. By being here as a single man, he is a cheater. The onus is on him. I’m not the guardian of anyone’s conscience but mine. If their relationship breaks down, I am responsible, she is responsible, Fab is responsible, technology is responsible: we all facilitated the breakdown happening. But he only is guilty. " What an immature attitude. | |||
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"Sorry but why should the partner who's being cheated on need to keep their partner on a leash and be aware of who they are sleeping next too. I've been cheated on and I wasn't Aware they was cheating and as for keeping him on a leash that's controlling behaviour, you can't go around controlling your partner into not cheating. " No you can't. Some people can't handle the lies and de eipt and don't have the mental strength to call it a day. Others try and put it out of their minds pretend g it's not happening. No one can lead a normal life like that. | |||
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"Sorry but why should the partner who's being cheated on need to keep their partner on a leash and be aware of who they are sleeping next too. I've been cheated on and I wasn't Aware they was cheating and as for keeping him on a leash that's controlling behaviour, you can't go around controlling your partner into not cheating. The most obvious answer is so that it doesn’t happen. I’ve been cheated on too, wasn’t aware either until I started putting 2 and 2 together. That’s what I call keeping on a leash: asking yourself the right questions when there are some bizarre patterns. It’s just an expression: I’m not condoning putting trackers on him!! In retrospect, I should have known better and I should have known earlier. He was entirely the guilty one, but yes I do feel responsible for having been blind and gullible at the time. " So what did you do about it if anything? | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. " Works both ways my friend. Ladies lie and cheat to. Its the way of the world. Human nature at its worst. | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. I think it’s about 5 years. I don’t agree that it’s just the man that’s responsible. The women that helped themselves to my other half, knowing he was cheating were part of the problem. The ‘well I’m single so it’s not my responsibility’ thing doesn’t work for me. If you’re knowingly getting involved with attached men who are cheating then you’re causing hurt to other women intentionally. In my view. " But some woman and men who cheat don't give a damn. My sister in law is an example. | |||
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"I have been in the gf/wife situation: that’s when I chose to be single for the rest of my life! That was 11 years ago, I never looked back. Men can’t keep it in their pants: is that really big news? We all know that. It’s the partner’s job to know what kind of person they are getting in bed with (it goes both ways), and make sure you keep him on a lead after that. I’ve done it, multiple times, until I got tired of having to do it. Women cheat too and I’ve met a few single men who made the same choice as mine, some of them in far more dramatic circumstances. In 2021 relationships are a choice. As for the woman who texted me this morning, I know the agony she’s going through. The oppressive pain in your chest and wondering if you know your partner at all. I hope she gets the right resolve that works for her. As for me, I have thanked the woman my ex cheated on me with, right after asking her to keep him on a tighter leash during the 18 months he harassed me after we broke up. The pain that I felt when I found out, that this woman I don’t know is probably feeling today, is what made me the free woman I am today. I didn’t make this man I’ve never met a cheater. By being here as a single man, he is a cheater. The onus is on him. I’m not the guardian of anyone’s conscience but mine. If their relationship breaks down, I am responsible, she is responsible, Fab is responsible, technology is responsible: we all facilitated the breakdown happening. But he only is guilty. What an immature attitude. "Explain how knowing your limitations and your impact on people’s lives is immature. | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. I think it’s about 5 years. I don’t agree that it’s just the man that’s responsible. The women that helped themselves to my other half, knowing he was cheating were part of the problem. The ‘well I’m single so it’s not my responsibility’ thing doesn’t work for me. If you’re knowingly getting involved with attached men who are cheating then you’re causing hurt to other women intentionally. In my view. " This Both people are at fault in reality. Not necessarily 50/50. Especially in a situation like this where the OP knew from the beginning that he was attached and acts surprised when the the cheated partner gets upset and starts asking questions. Comes across a bit sociopathic tbh as there is obviously no guilt for harm caused which the OP played a part in. | |||
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"I have been in the gf/wife situation: that’s when I chose to be single for the rest of my life! That was 11 years ago, I never looked back. Men can’t keep it in their pants: is that really big news? We all know that. It’s the partner’s job to know what kind of person they are getting in bed with (it goes both ways), and make sure you keep him on a lead after that. I’ve done it, multiple times, until I got tired of having to do it. Women cheat too and I’ve met a few single men who made the same choice as mine, some of them in far more dramatic circumstances. In 2021 relationships are a choice. As for the woman who texted me this morning, I know the agony she’s going through. The oppressive pain in your chest and wondering if you know your partner at all. I hope she gets the right resolve that works for her. As for me, I have thanked the woman my ex cheated on me with, right after asking her to keep him on a tighter leash during the 18 months he harassed me after we broke up. The pain that I felt when I found out, that this woman I don’t know is probably feeling today, is what made me the free woman I am today. I didn’t make this man I’ve never met a cheater. By being here as a single man, he is a cheater. The onus is on him. I’m not the guardian of anyone’s conscience but mine. If their relationship breaks down, I am responsible, she is responsible, Fab is responsible, technology is responsible: we all facilitated the breakdown happening. But he only is guilty. What an immature attitude.
Explain how knowing your limitations and your impact on people’s lives is immature."Knowing and facilitating then passing the buck on to him. Bravo. | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. " You might want to google "gaslighting" and "victim blaming" | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. I think it’s about 5 years. I don’t agree that it’s just the man that’s responsible. The women that helped themselves to my other half, knowing he was cheating were part of the problem. The ‘well I’m single so it’s not my responsibility’ thing doesn’t work for me. If you’re knowingly getting involved with attached men who are cheating then you’re causing hurt to other women intentionally. In my view. " Totally agree with this  | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. I think it’s about 5 years. I don’t agree that it’s just the man that’s responsible. The women that helped themselves to my other half, knowing he was cheating were part of the problem. The ‘well I’m single so it’s not my responsibility’ thing doesn’t work for me. If you’re knowingly getting involved with attached men who are cheating then you’re causing hurt to other women intentionally. In my view. This Both people are at fault in reality. Not necessarily 50/50. Especially in a situation like this where the OP knew from the beginning that he was attached and acts surprised when the the cheated partner gets upset and starts asking questions. Comes across a bit sociopathic tbh as there is obviously no guilt for harm caused which the OP played a part in. " Exactly, no remorse and shaming the guy because he got caught cheating even though it takes two to tango. | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. " This happens both ways not just men and men to need to accept exactly the same some people forget that women are just as bad at cheating and lying and their is good men and women in the world who dislike cheating like the plague | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. Edited for spelling
Men lying is not women's fault...just saying. If men were truthful from day one or even took responsibility for what comes out of their mouth things might be different.
Yes. Thank goodness all of the women on here only speak the truth. "I haven't said they do but the quote I responded to was specifically about women not being able to accept the truth therefore bring the cause of men lying. I also know that not all men lie and not all women tell the truth | |||
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"Sorry but why should the partner who's being cheated on need to keep their partner on a leash and be aware of who they are sleeping next too. I've been cheated on and I wasn't Aware they was cheating and as for keeping him on a leash that's controlling behaviour, you can't go around controlling your partner into not cheating. The most obvious answer is so that it doesn’t happen. I’ve been cheated on too, wasn’t aware either until I started putting 2 and 2 together. That’s what I call keeping on a leash: asking yourself the right questions when there are some bizarre patterns. It’s just an expression: I’m not condoning putting trackers on him!! In retrospect, I should have known better and I should have known earlier. He was entirely the guilty one, but yes I do feel responsible for having been blind and gullible at the time. So what did you do about it if anything? " First I stopped trusting him blindly, paid attention. That’s when I noticed he’d stopped having his kids every other weekend and instead disappeared all day on Sundays, he suddenly shaved down under, he came back once with hair on his jumper that wasn’t mine or his kids. Older stuff started to not feel right. Then once I did the forbidden thing: I looked on his laptop. Pandora’s box. That’s when I found out that there were 3 women (that I know of), the lies he said to make them feel sorry to them. After I kicked him out I realised that one was a proper affair because for the 18 months after we broke up, he tried to keep me on the side while having a relationship with her!! He was stalking me, waiting for me outside my home, emailing me he’d come to Bath, hanging around the places I go, asking me why I didn’t answer the door (duh!), saying he knew I was at home! Anyway I messaged his partner telling her what he was doing, sent her screenshots of his emails to me. When he changed jobs to go and work for a massive IT company (starts with an M, ends with a t!) and emailed me his bollocks from his work email, I reported him saying he was using his work email to harass me. I sent another message to his partner (with screenshots again) telling her that if it didn’t stop I would report him to the police.That’s when it stopped. | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. You might want to google "gaslighting" and "victim blaming" "I’m definitely not stating it’s women’s fault why men lie. That’s somewhat ignorant on your behalf, this proving my entire point. NO MAN IN THE WORLD WANTS TO BE WITH ONE WOMAN FOR HIS ENTIRE LIFE. And the sooner women come to terms with this, they can facilitate, accept and come to terms with it. Not crying into their pillow cos he put his dick in another hole. Men are perfectly able of loving multiple women or loving one and having sex with others. Some women are ok but it’s a minority in comparison to men. | |||
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"I have been in the gf/wife situation: that’s when I chose to be single for the rest of my life! That was 11 years ago, I never looked back. Men can’t keep it in their pants: is that really big news? We all know that. It’s the partner’s job to know what kind of person they are getting in bed with (it goes both ways), and make sure you keep him on a lead after that. I’ve done it, multiple times, until I got tired of having to do it. Women cheat too and I’ve met a few single men who made the same choice as mine, some of them in far more dramatic circumstances. In 2021 relationships are a choice. As for the woman who texted me this morning, I know the agony she’s going through. The oppressive pain in your chest and wondering if you know your partner at all. I hope she gets the right resolve that works for her. As for me, I have thanked the woman my ex cheated on me with, right after asking her to keep him on a tighter leash during the 18 months he harassed me after we broke up. The pain that I felt when I found out, that this woman I don’t know is probably feeling today, is what made me the free woman I am today. I didn’t make this man I’ve never met a cheater. By being here as a single man, he is a cheater. The onus is on him. I’m not the guardian of anyone’s conscience but mine. If their relationship breaks down, I am responsible, she is responsible, Fab is responsible, technology is responsible: we all facilitated the breakdown happening. But he only is guilty. What an immature attitude.
Explain how knowing your limitations and your impact on people’s lives is immature.
Knowing and facilitating then passing the buck on to him. Bravo. "He *CHOSE* to be here! On his own volition. He pays with his money a subscription. How does me chatting to him is facilitating? Do you think that pointing a finger at him would make him recoil in horror?? “How dare, Sir, a married man contact me… with your wile impure thoughts…” He is a grown up man, that I have never met, making his own decisions, for which is responsible, and now accountable to his gf who is probably crushing his nuts as he deserves it. I would be facilitating his cheating if I paid for his membership, or had introduced him to Fab knowing he’s married, lent him my home to have an affair. I texted the man! He gets his cock out 50 miles from me but I’m the one responsible for the cheating of a man I’ve never met? And you’re accusing me of immaturity? Grow up! | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. You might want to google "gaslighting" and "victim blaming"
I’m definitely not stating it’s women’s fault why men lie. That’s somewhat ignorant on your behalf, this proving my entire point.
NO MAN IN THE WORLD WANTS TO BE WITH ONE WOMAN FOR HIS ENTIRE LIFE.
And the sooner women come to terms with this, they can facilitate, accept and come to terms with it. Not crying into their pillow cos he put his dick in another hole.
Men are perfectly able of loving multiple women or loving one and having sex with others. Some women are ok but it’s a minority in comparison to men. "Stop speaking for all men lol. Any woman can fit into exactly what you’ve just said. It’s not about men vs women. If you don’t wanna be with one woman/ man forever that is absolutely and totally fine... doesn’t mean you need to hurt people in the process! Be honest about it and deal with it rather than cheating! Can’t comprehend how people can have literally no empathy, wether your the cheater or the one playing with cheating people.. crazy to me lol | |||
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"I have been in the gf/wife situation: that’s when I chose to be single for the rest of my life! That was 11 years ago, I never looked back. Men can’t keep it in their pants: is that really big news? We all know that. It’s the partner’s job to know what kind of person they are getting in bed with (it goes both ways), and make sure you keep him on a lead after that. I’ve done it, multiple times, until I got tired of having to do it. Women cheat too and I’ve met a few single men who made the same choice as mine, some of them in far more dramatic circumstances. In 2021 relationships are a choice. As for the woman who texted me this morning, I know the agony she’s going through. The oppressive pain in your chest and wondering if you know your partner at all. I hope she gets the right resolve that works for her. As for me, I have thanked the woman my ex cheated on me with, right after asking her to keep him on a tighter leash during the 18 months he harassed me after we broke up. The pain that I felt when I found out, that this woman I don’t know is probably feeling today, is what made me the free woman I am today. I didn’t make this man I’ve never met a cheater. By being here as a single man, he is a cheater. The onus is on him. I’m not the guardian of anyone’s conscience but mine. If their relationship breaks down, I am responsible, she is responsible, Fab is responsible, technology is responsible: we all facilitated the breakdown happening. But he only is guilty. What an immature attitude.
Explain how knowing your limitations and your impact on people’s lives is immature."I don’t think you do know impact on peoples lives. You seem to think that you’re not having an impact by interacting with attached men. But yoh really do. | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. I think it’s about 5 years. I don’t agree that it’s just the man that’s responsible. The women that helped themselves to my other half, knowing he was cheating were part of the problem. The ‘well I’m single so it’s not my responsibility’ thing doesn’t work for me. If you’re knowingly getting involved with attached men who are cheating then you’re causing hurt to other women intentionally. In my view. This Both people are at fault in reality. Not necessarily 50/50. Especially in a situation like this where the OP knew from the beginning that he was attached and acts surprised when the the cheated partner gets upset and starts asking questions. Comes across a bit sociopathic tbh as there is obviously no guilt for harm caused which the OP played a part in. " Nope: I’m only surprised that it’s the first message I receive. How do I act surprised? I’m asking for others experience! No I have no guilt: my fuckmates private life is not my business. None of it: It’s not my place to lecture them. Like by the way it’s not your place to lecture me. As much as I disagree with what they do, it’s their choice. Nothing I can say or do will change the choices that they make. You choose to believe in happily ever after fairy tales: it’s your prerogative. I’ve caved to the same cultural and societal bullshit. And then I grew up. Statistics, biology, evolution: all agree that human are not a monogamous species. You need to understand the meaning of words you use and clearly you don’t know what sociopathic means. | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. I think it’s about 5 years. I don’t agree that it’s just the man that’s responsible. The women that helped themselves to my other half, knowing he was cheating were part of the problem. The ‘well I’m single so it’s not my responsibility’ thing doesn’t work for me. If you’re knowingly getting involved with attached men who are cheating then you’re causing hurt to other women intentionally. In my view. This Both people are at fault in reality. Not necessarily 50/50. Especially in a situation like this where the OP knew from the beginning that he was attached and acts surprised when the the cheated partner gets upset and starts asking questions. Comes across a bit sociopathic tbh as there is obviously no guilt for harm caused which the OP played a part in. Nope: I’m only surprised that it’s the first message I receive. How do I act surprised? I’m asking for others experience! No I have no guilt: my fuckmates private life is not my business. None of it: It’s not my place to lecture them. Like by the way it’s not your place to lecture me. As much as I disagree with what they do, it’s their choice. Nothing I can say or do will change the choices that they make. You choose to believe in happily ever after fairy tales: it’s your prerogative. I’ve caved to the same cultural and societal bullshit. And then I grew up. Statistics, biology, evolution: all agree that human are not a monogamous species. You need to understand the meaning of words you use and clearly you don’t know what sociopathic means. " I believe in human decency not fairy tales. People are always going to cheat, no point lecturing them. Each to their own isn’t it. You can only control if you want to enable it or be part of it. Humans might not be monogamous but be honest about it without hurting people 
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"Blah blah blah, blame the man. "LOL which man? The cheater? Nah. Let's give him a pass hahahahaha | |||
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But you crack on believing your own misogynistic slop. | |||
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"I have been in the gf/wife situation: that’s when I chose to be single for the rest of my life! That was 11 years ago, I never looked back. Men can’t keep it in their pants: is that really big news? We all know that. It’s the partner’s job to know what kind of person they are getting in bed with (it goes both ways), and make sure you keep him on a lead after that. I’ve done it, multiple times, until I got tired of having to do it. Women cheat too and I’ve met a few single men who made the same choice as mine, some of them in far more dramatic circumstances. In 2021 relationships are a choice. As for the woman who texted me this morning, I know the agony she’s going through. The oppressive pain in your chest and wondering if you know your partner at all. I hope she gets the right resolve that works for her. As for me, I have thanked the woman my ex cheated on me with, right after asking her to keep him on a tighter leash during the 18 months he harassed me after we broke up. The pain that I felt when I found out, that this woman I don’t know is probably feeling today, is what made me the free woman I am today. I didn’t make this man I’ve never met a cheater. By being here as a single man, he is a cheater. The onus is on him. I’m not the guardian of anyone’s conscience but mine. If their relationship breaks down, I am responsible, she is responsible, Fab is responsible, technology is responsible: we all facilitated the breakdown happening. But he only is guilty. What an immature attitude.
Explain how knowing your limitations and your impact on people’s lives is immature.
I don’t think you do know impact on peoples lives. You seem to think that you’re not having an impact by interacting with attached men. But yoh really do. "No of course I do. Like I said if his relationship breaks down, I will share a part of the responsibility. There’s no doubt. And I do feel for her pain today. I also know that her finding out was meant to be. And you simply don’t know what good or bad will come from it. It’s wrong to assume that only some bad will come out of it. Her pain today is not the end of a sad film. It’s simply a stepping stone to the next chapter. It may strengthen their relationship. She may leave him and then find the love of her life. She may also do something dramatic. Who knows? If it hadn’t been me sending naughty texts, it could have been the next woman with whom he has an affair. I’m only a cog in the machine. It’s foolish to believe you can control people’s destiny and we, women are particularly guilty of it. We want to save our man, protect him from x,y,z. In the meantime, “he” basically just wants to get laid. Are you still stuck on that relationship? Don’t you think knowing who he really was eventually freed you from him? I am grateful to next woman he got fixated on after me. For me, knowing the truth was the worst but also the best thing in my life. | |||
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" "Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them." Oh yes you DEFINITELY ARE saying it's women's fault But you crack on believing your own misogynistic slop. "He’s not saying it’s women’s fault. He’s basically saying that men are dogs and dogs will always chase tail and we women are naive to believe that men are better than that!  Put this way, it doesn’t sound so misogynistic, does it?
Mars and Venus, nothing new: of course it’s very simplistic but it’s not completely wrong. Men and women go into relationships for different reasons; they also stay in the relationship for different reasons. We want do build a nest, we want plenty of things; men, really, just want to get laid. | |||
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"M has been messaging with a guy that used to be on fab who completely F'd it up for himself by suggesting she come meet him and not tell me, there was no problem till that he doesn't have to know. Of course when she said as much he was "only joking"
OP if you didn't know said person was in a relationship then its not your problem if you did have to ask yourself how you would feel in the wife/girlfriends position."This is more common than you think, they message a couple when in reality they want a single lady so they come up with excuses to cut the male half out. T | |||
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" "Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them." Oh yes you DEFINITELY ARE saying it's women's fault But you crack on believing your own misogynistic slop.
He’s not saying it’s women’s fault. He’s basically saying that men are dogs and dogs will always chase tail and we women are naive to believe that men are better than that! Put this way, it doesn’t sound so misogynistic, does it?
Mars and Venus, nothing new: of course it’s very simplistic but it’s not completely wrong. Men and women go into relationships for different reasons; they also stay in the relationship for different reasons. We want do build a nest, we want plenty of things; men, really, just want to get laid. "He is quite clearly saying that women must change before men will tell the truth. Men aren't dogs that's just a stereotype put about by people who want to excuse bad behaviour and lying. Another stereotype is that men and women go into relationships for different reasons. Some might I've seen evidence of dysfunctional and damaging relationships but there are many people who have the maturity to handle grown up partnerships where they don't feel they need to live by stereotypes. | |||
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"Blah blah blah, blame the man. "Blah blah blah, blame the woman. God, I hope you don’t work for the justice system if you believe that texting a married man is worse than cheating on your partner on multiple occasions and actively looking for more sex partners. It’s got nothing to do with genders: it’s about deceiving your partner. Keep up! | |||
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"M has been messaging with a guy that used to be on fab who completely F'd it up for himself by suggesting she come meet him and not tell me, there was no problem till that he doesn't have to know. Of course when she said as much he was "only joking"
OP if you didn't know said person was in a relationship then its not your problem if you did have to ask yourself how you would feel in the wife/girlfriends position.
This is more common than you think, they message a couple when in reality they want a single lady so they come up with excuses to cut the male half out.
T"Yep seen this so many times already | |||
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" "Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them." Oh yes you DEFINITELY ARE saying it's women's fault But you crack on believing your own misogynistic slop.
He’s not saying it’s women’s fault. He’s basically saying that men are dogs and dogs will always chase tail and we women are naive to believe that men are better than that! Put this way, it doesn’t sound so misogynistic, does it?
Mars and Venus, nothing new: of course it’s very simplistic but it’s not completely wrong. Men and women go into relationships for different reasons; they also stay in the relationship for different reasons. We want do build a nest, we want plenty of things; men, really, just want to get laid. "Oh come on -- you think calling women "naive" is better? It's just another way of sayings it's their fault, for actually thinking men are trustworthy. Again, victim blaming. Someone lies to you and it's your own fault for believing what they told you? Huh??? But listen OP, you obviously agree with him because your interpretation also sells men short, reducing them to rutting dogs that "just want to get laid". You know, there really ARE some decent men in the world, that actually tell the truth to their partners and explain their needs. Men that mean what they say, and say what they mean, and that don't cheat. You know that right? And fortunately a fair number of men, married and single, don't lie to the women in their lives. Which is great, because a lot of women, married and single, like to get laid as well. And a lot of us horny ladies prefer swingers, not liars. Simple. | |||
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"I have been in the gf/wife situation: that’s when I chose to be single for the rest of my life! That was 11 years ago, I never looked back. Men can’t keep it in their pants: is that really big news? We all know that. It’s the partner’s job to know what kind of person they are getting in bed with (it goes both ways), and make sure you keep him on a lead after that. I’ve done it, multiple times, until I got tired of having to do it. Women cheat too and I’ve met a few single men who made the same choice as mine, some of them in far more dramatic circumstances. In 2021 relationships are a choice. As for the woman who texted me this morning, I know the agony she’s going through. The oppressive pain in your chest and wondering if you know your partner at all. I hope she gets the right resolve that works for her. As for me, I have thanked the woman my ex cheated on me with, right after asking her to keep him on a tighter leash during the 18 months he harassed me after we broke up. The pain that I felt when I found out, that this woman I don’t know is probably feeling today, is what made me the free woman I am today. I didn’t make this man I’ve never met a cheater. By being here as a single man, he is a cheater. The onus is on him. I’m not the guardian of anyone’s conscience but mine. If their relationship breaks down, I am responsible, she is responsible, Fab is responsible, technology is responsible: we all facilitated the breakdown happening. But he only is guilty. What an immature attitude.
Explain how knowing your limitations and your impact on people’s lives is immature.
I don’t think you do know impact on peoples lives. You seem to think that you’re not having an impact by interacting with attached men. But yoh really do. "Exactly my point, but of course the man is at fault | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. You might want to google "gaslighting" and "victim blaming"
I’m definitely not stating it’s women’s fault why men lie. That’s somewhat ignorant on your behalf, this proving my entire point.
NO MAN IN THE WORLD WANTS TO BE WITH ONE WOMAN FOR HIS ENTIRE LIFE.
And the sooner women come to terms with this, they can facilitate, accept and come to terms with it. Not crying into their pillow cos he put his dick in another hole.
Men are perfectly able of loving multiple women or loving one and having sex with others. Some women are ok but it’s a minority in comparison to men. "No man you say.... Hmmmm ok | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. I think it’s about 5 years. I don’t agree that it’s just the man that’s responsible. The women that helped themselves to my other half, knowing he was cheating were part of the problem. The ‘well I’m single so it’s not my responsibility’ thing doesn’t work for me. If you’re knowingly getting involved with attached men who are cheating then you’re causing hurt to other women intentionally. In my view. This Both people are at fault in reality. Not necessarily 50/50. Especially in a situation like this where the OP knew from the beginning that he was attached and acts surprised when the the cheated partner gets upset and starts asking questions. Comes across a bit sociopathic tbh as there is obviously no guilt for harm caused which the OP played a part in. Nope: I’m only surprised that it’s the first message I receive. How do I act surprised? I’m asking for others experience! No I have no guilt: my fuckmates private life is not my business. None of it: It’s not my place to lecture them. Like by the way it’s not your place to lecture me. As much as I disagree with what they do, it’s their choice. Nothing I can say or do will change the choices that they make. You choose to believe in happily ever after fairy tales: it’s your prerogative. I’ve caved to the same cultural and societal bullshit. And then I grew up. Statistics, biology, evolution: all agree that human are not a monogamous species. You need to understand the meaning of words you use and clearly you don’t know what sociopathic means. " I'm quite aware what sociopathic means One symptom is making decisions without a care or guilt for damage caused. You are both in the wrong tbh. Being lied to is one thing regarding their relationship status is one thing, but carrying on while knowing he is married could quite easily come under what I just said. You're post putting all blame the on to him also gives credence to this. If you had morals you would of told him to fuck off in the first place But you dont. | |||
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"Blah blah blah, blame the man.
Blah blah blah, blame the woman.
God, I hope you don’t work for the justice system if you believe that texting a married man is worse than cheating on your partner on multiple occasions and actively looking for more sex partners.
It’s got nothing to do with genders: it’s about deceiving your partner. Keep up!"But you are part of the deception, and you expressed that everything was his fault! If he hadn't have got caught it would of been fine yeah? Double standards tinkerbell! | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. I think it’s about 5 years. I don’t agree that it’s just the man that’s responsible. The women that helped themselves to my other half, knowing he was cheating were part of the problem. The ‘well I’m single so it’s not my responsibility’ thing doesn’t work for me. If you’re knowingly getting involved with attached men who are cheating then you’re causing hurt to other women intentionally. In my view. This Both people are at fault in reality. Not necessarily 50/50. Especially in a situation like this where the OP knew from the beginning that he was attached and acts surprised when the the cheated partner gets upset and starts asking questions. Comes across a bit sociopathic tbh as there is obviously no guilt for harm caused which the OP played a part in. Nope: I’m only surprised that it’s the first message I receive. How do I act surprised? I’m asking for others experience! No I have no guilt: my fuckmates private life is not my business. None of it: It’s not my place to lecture them. Like by the way it’s not your place to lecture me. As much as I disagree with what they do, it’s their choice. Nothing I can say or do will change the choices that they make. You choose to believe in happily ever after fairy tales: it’s your prerogative. I’ve caved to the same cultural and societal bullshit. And then I grew up. Statistics, biology, evolution: all agree that human are not a monogamous species. You need to understand the meaning of words you use and clearly you don’t know what sociopathic means. I'm quite aware what sociopathic means One symptom is making decisions without a care or guilt for damage caused. You are both in the wrong tbh. Being lied to is one thing regarding their relationship status is one thing, but carrying on while knowing he is married could quite easily come under what I just said. You're post putting all blame the on to him also gives credence to this. If you had morals you would of told him to fuck off in the first place But you dont. " This! | |||
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" "Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them." Oh yes you DEFINITELY ARE saying it's women's fault But you crack on believing your own misogynistic slop.
He’s not saying it’s women’s fault. He’s basically saying that men are dogs and dogs will always chase tail and we women are naive to believe that men are better than that! Put this way, it doesn’t sound so misogynistic, does it?
Mars and Venus, nothing new: of course it’s very simplistic but it’s not completely wrong. Men and women go into relationships for different reasons; they also stay in the relationship for different reasons. We want do build a nest, we want plenty of things; men, really, just want to get laid.
He is quite clearly saying that women must change before men will tell the truth.
Men aren't dogs that's just a stereotype put about by people who want to excuse bad behaviour and lying. Another stereotype is that men and women go into relationships for different reasons. Some might I've seen evidence of dysfunctional and damaging relationships but there are many people who have the maturity to handle grown up partnerships where they don't feel they need to live by stereotypes.
"My understanding is: he’s saying until women see men for what they are (“accept and handle the truth”), men will always pretend to be what women want them to be. Re men being dogs, I was being silly, although I think that’s what he’s saying and I was paraphrasing. However, it’s not a stereotype in the sense that behavioural endocrinology is a science and that the studies of the effects of testosterone on (human) behaviour is well documented. Maturity, responsibility, respect, equality: those are goals, benchmarks to achieve. Like the framed picture of your couple is not what your couple is at all time. Yet you recognise yourself in the picture as well as during the less perfect moment of your relationship. Same goes for everyone, as individuals, as couples. They try their best most of the time, perhaps with the same goals as yours; sometimes they will succeed, sometimes they will fail. Yes plenty people have the maturity to handle grown up partnerships, and plenty don’t and I doubt that their reasons are often related to conforming to a stereotype. I do believe that it’s got more to do with biology, hormones, sometimes alcohol, definitely lack of judgment. Quite a few people have contacted me about this thread, privately because they don’t want to receive abuse, or being called sociopathic and other names, like I was. I am curious as to what goes through their mind when people sign up here behind their partner’s back. I’ll let you know of my findings! | |||
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"I knew and again it’s not relevant to my question: you play as an open-relationship couple. It’s your practice as a couple. You don’t know that the single people you meet are genuinely single: that’s what I’m interested in. It is relevant to the question. You’ve knowingly got yourself into that situation, you must have thought about how you’d react if someone found out you were helping yourself to their partner. No? That reaction will be different to if is was a complete surprise. If you hadn’t have known then we would be checking you’re ok with being lied to and making sure you’re ok. But you did know. Of course I have thought about it! I have been in her situation multiple times. My only surprise is that it’s never happened before considering what terrible liars cheaters usually are. I love how your hate and disgust are sipping through your words, jumbling your grammar! Do you know where that comes from? The visceral fear of having been cheated on yourself. And you probably have, like I have, like most of us have. Once you accept it, once you accept Prince Charming, or ex-Prince Charming, may have shagged the Evil Stepmother or one of the 7 dwarves during that weekend away with your friends, the world and your life make more sense. I had a relationship with a serial cheater. It’s why I’m single now, probably a bit like you. Knowing how awful it felt each time I found out, I don’t ever want to be the cause of that pain for someone else so cheaters are off my list of people I’ll entertain. May I ask how long it’s been since you put an end to it? I understand your choice. I really do. But do you understand that you are not the cause of the pain, merely a conduit? *He* is the cause of the pain. *His cheating* is the cause of the pain. *His decision to sign up here and meet other women* is the cause of the pain. *His lies to her* are the cause of the pain. It often is easier for the cheated to deflect the pain and the anger to a stranger, to change the narrative to the poor husband falling prey, blahdiblah... The reality is that an attached man who makes the conscious decision to be here without his partner’s knowledge is the only cause of her pain and that’s the most difficult thing for her to face. I think it’s about 5 years. I don’t agree that it’s just the man that’s responsible. The women that helped themselves to my other half, knowing he was cheating were part of the problem. The ‘well I’m single so it’s not my responsibility’ thing doesn’t work for me. If you’re knowingly getting involved with attached men who are cheating then you’re causing hurt to other women intentionally. In my view. This Both people are at fault in reality. Not necessarily 50/50. Especially in a situation like this where the OP knew from the beginning that he was attached and acts surprised when the the cheated partner gets upset and starts asking questions. Comes across a bit sociopathic tbh as there is obviously no guilt for harm caused which the OP played a part in. Nope: I’m only surprised that it’s the first message I receive. How do I act surprised? I’m asking for others experience! No I have no guilt: my fuckmates private life is not my business. None of it: It’s not my place to lecture them. Like by the way it’s not your place to lecture me. As much as I disagree with what they do, it’s their choice. Nothing I can say or do will change the choices that they make. You choose to believe in happily ever after fairy tales: it’s your prerogative. I’ve caved to the same cultural and societal bullshit. And then I grew up. Statistics, biology, evolution: all agree that human are not a monogamous species. You need to understand the meaning of words you use and clearly you don’t know what sociopathic means. I'm quite aware what sociopathic means One symptom is making decisions without a care or guilt for damage caused. You are both in the wrong tbh. Being lied to is one thing regarding their relationship status is one thing, but carrying on while knowing he is married could quite easily come under what I just said. You're post putting all blame the on to him also gives credence to this. If you had morals you would of told him to fuck off in the first place But you dont. " If I had YOUR morals, with include telling people what to do with their life. It’s not putting blame to say it’s his choice to be here on Fab! It’s a mere fact! He wasn’t forced. YOU put the blame. I’m saying he played with fire and he gets burned: it’s a statement, an observation. My morals is that it’s his grown up choice (albeit wrong) to do what he wants with his cock, that it’s not my place to tell people who they should or should not fuck as long as it’s human, of legal age and consenting. That’s my morals. Your boss, your parents, your rabbi, your whatever would probably think you have no morals for being on a site like this, for fucking whoever you fuck that is not your other half! You know that very rude thing that you would be telling them for trying to impose their morals, their principles on you? That’s exactly what I’m telling you for questioning my morals. It’s my choice to choose who I fuck, like it’s your choice, your absolute prerogative to choose who you fuck (as long as it’s legal and consensual). You assume that I make decisions without a care of the damage caused. That’s on you: I’ve said otherwise in probably 3 or 4 posts on this thread. It’s just you projecting who you think I am, a construct, on me; what you choose to believe is out of my control. | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. Edited for spelling
Men lying is not women's fault...just saying. If men were truthful from day one or even took responsibility for what comes out of their mouth things might be different.
I never said that men’s lying was women’s fault! I’m saying that *choosing to blindly believe that their man wouldn’t lie* is women’s fault. There’s a massive difference!"It's called trust. You can't live your life assuming the worst in people. People lie. Men and Women. If a person chooses to lie or cheat then that then it is on them not the other person... You can't be with someone and then second guess everything they say to you. | |||
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"Guess this isn't going the way you expected to OP! " It does actually: because I know that despite what you would expect here, everyone assume that what they do is the norm and just love to lash out on those who don’t fit what they see as “the norm”. I’ve seen people judged here for all sorts of reason, their fetish, their bisexuality, etc. It’s extremely parochial and narrow-minded. I also know that some people relish in mob mentality and that your question is designed to cause me distress which proves my point about the caution to be taken about moral judgement. You go after me for disagreeing with your principles but you are trying to cause distress to someone for the simple fact that they disagree with you. Your perceived moral superiority makes you behave in a bullish way. And no, that does not surprise me. The answers I was hoping for are in my inbox. | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. Edited for spelling
Men lying is not women's fault...just saying. If men were truthful from day one or even took responsibility for what comes out of their mouth things might be different.
I never said that men’s lying was women’s fault! I’m saying that *choosing to blindly believe that their man wouldn’t lie* is women’s fault. There’s a massive difference!
It's called trust. You can't live your life assuming the worst in people. People lie. Men and Women. If a person chooses to lie or cheat then that then it is on them not the other person... You can't be with someone and then second guess everything they say to you. "Yes trust. Not blind trust. | |||
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"I won’t knowingly meet anyone who’s attached because I don’t agree with cheating. I think if a partner contacted me I’d be honest and explain how I met their partner and explain that I thought they were single. I’d have no desire to be complicit in their lie. this all day for us, and its not normaly hard to spot those who arent single, there is always a give away" Me too, I won’t meet attached guys and don’t meet guys who can’t accommodate for that reason! | |||
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"Women , in general are either ignorant or naive towards men and their ways. I cannot speak for all, but definitely can the majority. We men are like Pokemon catchers, constantly on the look out for the next best Pokemon to add to our collection. Me personally, I stopped lying about 4-5 years ago as I learnt my lesson in a terrible way I’d rather not repeat. Others however , have not. Until women can learn to accept and handle the truth, men are always going to lie to them. Edited for spelling
Men lying is not women's fault...just saying. If men were truthful from day one or even took responsibility for what comes out of their mouth things might be different.
I never said that men’s lying was women’s fault! I’m saying that *choosing to blindly believe that their man wouldn’t lie* is women’s fault. There’s a massive difference!
It's called trust. You can't live your life assuming the worst in people. People lie. Men and Women. If a person chooses to lie or cheat then that then it is on them not the other person... You can't be with someone and then second guess everything they say to you.
Yes trust. Not blind trust. "I completely disagree. You either trust someone or you do not. But that's just my own opinion. Yours of course is entirely up to you. I'm not judging as there is obviously more to it. | |||
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"Blah blah blah, blame the man.
Blah blah blah, blame the woman.
God, I hope you don’t work for the justice system if you believe that texting a married man is worse than cheating on your partner on multiple occasions and actively looking for more sex partners.
It’s got nothing to do with genders: it’s about deceiving your partner. Keep up!
But you are part of the deception, and you expressed that everything was his fault! If he hadn't have got caught it would of been fine yeah? Double standards tinkerbell! "You judge people for what they do, not what perhaps I could have done if… I don’t deceive his partner: he deceives his partner about his extramarital activities, that perhaps would have included me. I’ve said it earlier: there’s a difference between responsibility and guilt. | |||
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"Guess this isn't going the way you expected to OP! It does actually: because I know that despite what you would expect here, everyone assume that what they do is the norm and just love to lash out on those who don’t fit what they see as “the norm”. I’ve seen people judged here for all sorts of reason, their fetish, their bisexuality, etc. It’s extremely parochial and narrow-minded. I also know that some people relish in mob mentality and that your question is designed to cause me distress which proves my point about the caution to be taken about moral judgement. You go after me for disagreeing with your principles but you are trying to cause distress to someone for the simple fact that they disagree with you. Your perceived moral superiority makes you behave in a bullish way. And no, that does not surprise me. The answers I was hoping for are in my inbox. " Your a home wrecker . Whatever way you paint its what you are. | |||
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"Anyone has an experience of the partner/spouse of the person you’re playing with texting you “how did you get his/her number and have you met in person?” I just said the questions are for him not for me but I’m curious to hear how you fabsters have dealt with it. Context: I’m a single woman " I wouldn’t have responded; I would have just blocked the number and walked away. Why get involved? | |||
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"Guess this isn't going the way you expected to OP! It does actually: because I know that despite what you would expect here, everyone assume that what they do is the norm and just love to lash out on those who don’t fit what they see as “the norm”. I’ve seen people judged here for all sorts of reason, their fetish, their bisexuality, etc. It’s extremely parochial and narrow-minded. I also know that some people relish in mob mentality and that your question is designed to cause me distress which proves my point about the caution to be taken about moral judgement. You go after me for disagreeing with your principles but you are trying to cause distress to someone for the simple fact that they disagree with you. Your perceived moral superiority makes you behave in a bullish way. And no, that does not surprise me. The answers I was hoping for are in my inbox. " Oh dear, someone has an online thesaurus. It was your last few sentences excusing yourself of all wrong doing and putting it on the cheat that I was referring to. Were you comfortable before he got caught? Seems that way. Wife finds out? His fault  | |||
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"Guess this isn't going the way you expected to OP! It does actually: because I know that despite what you would expect here, everyone assume that what they do is the norm and just love to lash out on those who don’t fit what they see as “the norm”. I’ve seen people judged here for all sorts of reason, their fetish, their bisexuality, etc. It’s extremely parochial and narrow-minded. I also know that some people relish in mob mentality and that your question is designed to cause me distress which proves my point about the caution to be taken about moral judgement. You go after me for disagreeing with your principles but you are trying to cause distress to someone for the simple fact that they disagree with you. Your perceived moral superiority makes you behave in a bullish way. And no, that does not surprise me. The answers I was hoping for are in my inbox. Oh dear, someone has an online thesaurus. It was your last few sentences excusing yourself of all wrong doing and putting it on the cheat that I was referring to. Were you comfortable before he got caught? Seems that way. Wife finds out? His fault "It’s just called an education. | |||
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"Guess this isn't going the way you expected to OP! It does actually: because I know that despite what you would expect here, everyone assume that what they do is the norm and just love to lash out on those who don’t fit what they see as “the norm”. I’ve seen people judged here for all sorts of reason, their fetish, their bisexuality, etc. It’s extremely parochial and narrow-minded. I also know that some people relish in mob mentality and that your question is designed to cause me distress which proves my point about the caution to be taken about moral judgement. You go after me for disagreeing with your principles but you are trying to cause distress to someone for the simple fact that they disagree with you. Your perceived moral superiority makes you behave in a bullish way. And no, that does not surprise me. The answers I was hoping for are in my inbox. Oh dear, someone has an online thesaurus. It was your last few sentences excusing yourself of all wrong doing and putting it on the cheat that I was referring to. Were you comfortable before he got caught? Seems that way. Wife finds out? His fault
It’s just called an education. "For who? You? Him? | |||
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"Anyone has an experience of the partner/spouse of the person you’re playing with texting you “how did you get his/her number and have you met in person?” I just said the questions are for him not for me but I’m curious to hear how you fabsters have dealt with it. Context: I’m a single woman I wouldn’t have responded; I would have just blocked the number and walked away. Why get involved?" Because despite what the couple of self-righteous mean girls here believe, I feel for her, I know the agony she must have been through, she deserves to be acknowledged (or at least she doesn’t deserve to be ignored), and I am already involved.The distinction between responsibility and guilt is a bit too complex for some here; but I’m am undeniably responsible for her finding out her partner fucks around so I owed her a reply. | |||
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"Anyone has an experience of the partner/spouse of the person you’re playing with texting you “how did you get his/her number and have you met in person?” I just said the questions are for him not for me but I’m curious to hear how you fabsters have dealt with it. Context: I’m a single woman That's strictly not called swinging. That's called cheating and going behind your back." | |||
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"Anyone has an experience of the partner/spouse of the person you’re playing with texting you “how did you get his/her number and have you met in person?” I just said the questions are for him not for me but I’m curious to hear how you fabsters have dealt with it. Context: I’m a single woman I wouldn’t have responded; I would have just blocked the number and walked away. Why get involved? Because despite what the couple of self-righteous mean girls here believe, I feel for her, I know the agony she must have been through, she deserves to be acknowledged (or at least she doesn’t deserve to be ignored), and I am already involved.The distinction between responsibility and guilt is a bit too complex for some here; but I’m am undeniably responsible for her finding out her partner fucks around so I owed her a reply. " I agree. She deserves a reply and to not be lied too. If you get yourself involved (purpose or accident!) you deal with it. The question wasn’t do you speak to/ sleep with cheating people lol, for which I have strong opinions. But it’s totally gone off on a tangent ha! | |||
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"Haha the lovely op sent us an abusive pm then blocker us. So not only a home wrecker but a coward and ohh that vile language in the pm . Well played girl. You are the very best of fab." And men have a bad rap on here! Happy to knowingly shag a married man then say it's all his fault when the wife calls! Bunnies being boiled as we speak | |||
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"Anyone has an experience of the partner/spouse of the person you’re playing with texting you “how did you get his/her number and have you met in person?” I just said the questions are for him not for me but I’m curious to hear how you fabsters have dealt with it. Context: I’m a single woman I wouldn’t have responded; I would have just blocked the number and walked away. Why get involved? Because despite what the couple of self-righteous mean girls here believe, I feel for her, I know the agony she must have been through, she deserves to be acknowledged (or at least she doesn’t deserve to be ignored), and I am already involved.The distinction between responsibility and guilt is a bit too complex for some here; but I’m am undeniably responsible for her finding out her partner fucks around so I owed her a reply. " So having known the pain you knowingly fucked a married guy and told his wife. That's the story in a nutshell | |||
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"Haha the lovely op sent us an abusive pm then blocker us. So not only a home wrecker but a coward and ohh that vile language in the pm . Well played girl. You are the very best of fab." This is what I sent. Unlike you, I don’t call people names in public because I disagree with them. In my profile (as you you do, calling them rude), in my private conversations (below) or in public (as you do here). “ Yep, that’s exactly what I am! I forced the poor guy to cheat on his partner during all their relationship and I forced him to create an account here, put up (tasteful) pictures of himself and pay for a membership; I coerced him to find women here with whom he had sex. And THEN, nasty me plotted to finally get him to give me his phone number and damn, she found me out 10 days before we were going to meet for the first time! I’m an evil home wrecker! Mwahahaha! Clever you, you uncovered me! Speaking of uncovered, I don’t judge you, call you names for doing things I would consider inappropriate, indecent and too distasteful to expose in public: it’s your inalienable right to live your sexuality exactly the way that you want. It’s mine to fuck whoever I want however I want and I have a pretty good idea where to shove your self-righteousness.” | |||
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"Haha the lovely op sent us an abusive pm then blocker us. So not only a home wrecker but a coward and ohh that vile language in the pm . Well played girl. You are the very best of fab. This is what I sent. Unlike you, I don’t call people names in public because I disagree with them. In my profile (as you you do, calling them rude), in my private conversations (below) or in public (as you do here). “ Yep, that’s exactly what I am! I forced the poor guy to cheat on his partner during all their relationship and I forced him to create an account here, put up (tasteful) pictures of himself and pay for a membership; I coerced him to find women here with whom he had sex. And THEN, nasty me plotted to finally get him to give me his phone number and damn, she found me out 10 days before we were going to meet for the first time! I’m an evil home wrecker! Mwahahaha! Clever you, you uncovered me! Speaking of uncovered, I don’t judge you, call you names for doing things I would consider inappropriate, indecent and too distasteful to expose in public: it’s your inalienable right to live your sexuality exactly the way that you want. It’s mine to fuck whoever I want however I want and I have a pretty good idea where to shove your self-righteousness.”" only cowards block without a chance to reply | |||
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" Because despite what the couple of self-righteous mean girls here believe, I feel for her, I know the agony she must have been through " It begs the question then, knowing how you felt, why would you even entertain getting involved in another womans hurt? To the question in the OP Yes we have been there, on another site we met a man a good few times, didn't have any clue he was in a relationship, there were no signs at all We then got a mail one day from someone who said she had found his profile and had read his mails between us, turns out they had a couples account so god knows why he was going behind her back, but I have to be honest, it was an awful conversation and even though we didn't know he was attached and cheating we felt awful. I wouldn't knowingly do that knowing how much hurt was there for that woman | |||
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