FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Time wasters
Time wasters
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *corpio 50 OP Man
over a year ago
waterlooville |
Why do a lot people chat and messages for days sometimes then block or disappear from the site ? I am on here to meet people and if arranged I meet or politely say no it’s so infu that there are people on here with no intentions of meeting etc. Rant over . |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Why do a lot people chat and messages for days sometimes then block or disappear from the site ? I am on here to meet people and if arranged I meet or politely say no it’s so infu that there are people on here with no intentions of meeting etc. Rant over . "
When we first joined we fell victim to time wasters as you call them but learnt valuable lessons which has now enabled us to enjoy our fab journey much more but still allowing time wasters to do just that and waste their time and not ours.
The main tool we now use is our profile and thankfully it works well for us!!!!
I’d suggest op that you don’t build up your hopes and take things at your pace and not theirs and cross all the T,s and dot all the I,s before committing to a meet when allowed.
Best of luck.
T |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
It could be any number of things op, real life takes over, they changed their minds or you said something that put them off.
Of course there are some people who have no intention of meeting and that's probably been more during the pandemic, as many aren't meeting anyway. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Why do a lot people chat and messages for days sometimes then block or disappear from the site ? I am on here to meet people and if arranged I meet or politely say no it’s so infu that there are people on here with no intentions of meeting etc. Rant over . "
We would add another group of people to the list of time wasters.
The ones who completely ignore profiles and bother you anyway.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Why do a lot people chat and messages for days sometimes then block or disappear from the site ? I am on here to meet people and if arranged I meet or politely say no it’s so infu that there are people on here with no intentions of meeting etc. Rant over . "
I have no intention of meeting on here and no rules state i have too.
I'm not a time wasters either.
Chat to people if I'm in the mood to chat, (not often). Sometimes when chatting, guys don't take no for an answer so I end up either ignoring or blocking. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
For us it takes a while for everyone to be free together. Rhiannon works a lot so it's usually only Saturdays and getting those to line up with other couples childminders and general life getting in the way means we don't meet at the drop of the hat. We also find getting to know those we play with first makes for a much better experience for all concerned. We haven't been meeting anyone for a while until lately but even then it took 3 weeks to get together but it had none of the awkward moments we have encountered before. Couple we are meeting soon we have been talking to for well over a year but they are now really close friends so going further is a natural progression. Not everyone who doesn't rush into a meet is a time waster |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For us it takes a while for everyone to be free together. Rhiannon works a lot so it's usually only Saturdays and getting those to line up with other couples childminders and general life getting in the way means we don't meet at the drop of the hat. We also find getting to know those we play with first makes for a much better experience for all concerned. We haven't been meeting anyone for a while until lately but even then it took 3 weeks to get together but it had none of the awkward moments we have encountered before. Couple we are meeting soon we have been talking to for well over a year but they are now really close friends so going further is a natural progression. Not everyone who doesn't rush into a meet is a time waster"
Totally agree!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For us it takes a while for everyone to be free together. Rhiannon works a lot so it's usually only Saturdays and getting those to line up with other couples childminders and general life getting in the way means we don't meet at the drop of the hat. We also find getting to know those we play with first makes for a much better experience for all concerned. We haven't been meeting anyone for a while until lately but even then it took 3 weeks to get together but it had none of the awkward moments we have encountered before. Couple we are meeting soon we have been talking to for well over a year but they are now really close friends so going further is a natural progression. Not everyone who doesn't rush into a meet is a time waster
Totally agree!!"
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
As everyone has said life gets in the way and we can only meet on a Saturday mostly and so many expect way to much on here and if we do arrange to meet we always do and also make sure we have more than enough free time to do so hence the Saturday bit as that is our free day/night..  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I suppose everyone has their reasons for behaving as they do. Infuriating and frustrating as it is, they are only human (ok, that’s debatable sometimes). |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I always have a social with no expectations & arrange to meet in town so if they're a no show I can do a bit of shopping or message a non fab friend for a coffee.
Pre covid I didn't chat for long until I ask about meeting for a social, if they're not interested in setting a time, place, etc I stop chatting. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Create the right expectations as soon as you can!
Most people are not attracted to most other people. They won't instantly know that they are not compatible, from looking at a couple of pics and reading a message or 2. But it's realistic to expect just a fraction of the people who you chat with to progress to a physical meet. And not all physical meets will become sexual or sexually satisfying.
Run the numbers. You just won't be mutually attractive or compatible with most other people. If it's a couple or group, it dwindles further.
The rule here is no reply is no interest, ie. If you have chatted and hear no more, it's due to no further interest - this is NOT time wasting, this is normal life and expectations. The real world.
Fix your expectations and change your approach, if appropriate. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Why do a lot people chat and messages for days sometimes then block or disappear from the site ? I am on here to meet people and if arranged I meet or politely say no it’s so infu that there are people on here with no intentions of meeting etc. Rant over . "
The beauty of the site is that we are NOT all here for the same reasons. The crap bit is that not everyone is up front about that.
I like to chat, and try to make that clear. I do meet up, when it happens, but even then it's not a sure thing that anything other than that social is going to happen.
Ideally everyone would be honest here about what they are looking for, but let's face it: many aren't honest. Don't put all your eggs in one basket, chat with a variety, and move on when one doesn't work. So it goes. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think some people have an attitude that this is a swinging site so everyone must fuck as soon as they receive a message !
As the male part of a cuckold couple then it’s good to build up a rapport with guys and couples prior to any potential meets.
In reality most people on here are quite selective in who they meet and don’t jump into bed every time they get a ‘how’s your day’ or ‘you look hot’ message ! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The thing that annoys us is you write a profile about what you are offering and looking for etc, people clearly do not read it and then wonder why we don'y answer or block etc! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
the issue we find on here is people who just go silent .. have had more than a few chats where the person just effectively disappears. A simple, 'Y'know what, I'm not feeling it right now' isn't that bloody hard and since we are all adults not a hard thing to do. Not even talking about the catfish etc, I'm talking about real members. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"the issue we find on here is people who just go silent .. have had more than a few chats where the person just effectively disappears. A simple, 'Y'know what, I'm not feeling it right now' isn't that bloody hard and since we are all adults not a hard thing to do. Not even talking about the catfish etc, I'm talking about real members. "
This is the most frequent complaint I have... please, if you start a chat at least have the decency to close it with a little respect for the person you have engaged with... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
People use the site all different ways. Just because you're here to meet doesn't mean everyone is, doesn't make them time wasters.The pandemic will be having an impact currently too. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
When you start to talking to these people,do they tell you they are going to meet,or do you just assume?
Some people like to chat,some reply to messages with no intention of meeting,just politely responding to messages received.
I don't see how someone is a time waster unless they say they will meet,and don't turn up.
Nothing is guaranteed on fab. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *adMerWoman
over a year ago
Sandwich |
"Why do a lot people chat and messages for days sometimes then block or disappear from the site ? I am on here to meet people and if arranged I meet or politely say no it’s so infu that there are people on here with no intentions of meeting etc. Rant over . "
People have all sorts of reasons why they might chat and then decide to block. My most popular reasons are that they have little conversation beyond the sexual or that they say something I find offensive.
Just because I do meet some people it doesn’t entitle everyone to think that I will meet them. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Why do a lot people chat and messages for days sometimes then block or disappear from the site ? I am on here to meet people and if arranged I meet or politely say no it’s so infu that there are people on here with no intentions of meeting etc. Rant over . "
Perhaps they got bored. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I wouldn't consider someone I chatted to for a few days only a time waster. Of someone has been chatting for a long time and then stops after agreeing to meet that is what I would consider more of a timewaster.
People may find if you are asking to meet quickly off putting I know I do as I prefer to chat and get to know someone. It is one of the reasons I will stop talking to some one especially if I have already explained I don't meet quick off here as I learnt that lesson early on when I did and it was the worst and scariest meet I ever had .
And people are on here for many different reasons just because they may not be looking for what you want from here doesn't make them a timewaster. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Why do a lot people chat and messages for days sometimes then block or disappear from the site ? I am on here to meet people and if arranged I meet or politely say no it’s so infu that there are people on here with no intentions of meeting etc. Rant over . "
You just have to accept that there are so many people on Fab who will never meet simple as that
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
