FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Swinging caused break up ?
Swinging caused break up ?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Have any of you gone into swinging with your eyes and expectations wide open open but realised afterwards that it was a big mistake
My husband is desperate to meet as a couple (we both have singles profiles) but I don't want to see him with someone else.
He says seeing me with another man would be a real turn on but he gets jealous and has a habit of bringing things up and using them as weapons
Have any of you gone into swinging happily but ended up with it finishing your relationship ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Im sure we have spoken in the past about this, you on your other profile, me on my old one.
You've never been happy about the idea and i'd say keep things as you do, as it works for you both xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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With us its seeing each other playing with others that's the turn on, we have discussed and tried playing separately and I (Mrs) found I didn't like it, Mr is fine with it. But because its not something we both want we have spoken about it, moved on from it and decided its not for us. Not letting it ruin what we have. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The same as someone else has already said, if you not sure and you dont think you would like seeing him with someone else, and you mentioned he can be jealous! Then I wouldn't swing together! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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we first joined Fab's we both had single profiles as well as our couple's, but now we only swing together. I find it a huge turn watching my partner (Pork) getting it on. But to think he was playing away Solo that dosn't do it for me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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me and my x wife had joint and single profiles .... we did split after she fell in love with a bloke so nothing is set in concrete she is happy now good on her they cant swing now as they both get the green eye monster funny how things pan out lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm another one who doesn't share my partner, but he is turned on by sharing me. The amount of people who have said I'm selfish or similar is ridiculous! If my partner ever said to me to stop I would in a heartbeat as he means more to me than all this ever would. Each to their own and if you're not sure about it don't do it. |
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you wouldnt entertaine a total stranger trying to "talk you in to something ,you dont want to do " .so why would you even consider letting someone who loves and cherishes you do that ? im sure your partner is much more concerned about your happiness and comfort levels than them getting a thrill . if not, and their wants are more important than you then id be questioning not only anything to do with swinging but my whole relaltionship !
i dont even see whats there is even to consider here .youve obviously thought it over alot ,you arent happy or comfortable to swing as a cpl togeteher .... end of discussion .if your feelings and comforts levels change (as can happen )im sure youd be first to tell him. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm another one who doesn't share my partner, but he is turned on by sharing me. The amount of people who have said I'm selfish or similar is ridiculous! If my partner ever said to me to stop I would in a heartbeat as he means more to me than all this ever would. Each to their own and if you're not sure about it don't do it."
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"I'm another one who doesn't share my partner, but he is turned on by sharing me. The amount of people who have said I'm selfish or similar is ridiculous! If my partner ever said to me to stop I would in a heartbeat as he means more to me than all this ever would. Each to their own and if you're not sure about it don't do it. "
another |
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I reckon the biggest issue facing the OP isn't "to swing or not"; once the idea takes root it is hard to not want to sleep with other people. What uf either u or your hubby want to still pkay but the other is set against it? It could lead to cheating. Once a couple begin exploring i think they're in it for the long haul. Just a thought. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Have any of you gone into swinging with your eyes and expectations wide open open but realised afterwards that it was a big mistake
My husband is desperate to meet as a couple (we both have singles profiles) but I don't want to see him with someone else.
He says seeing me with another man would be a real turn on but he gets jealous and has a habit of bringing things up and using them as weapons
Have any of you gone into swinging happily but ended up with it finishing your relationship ? "
Can't particularly comment on the swinging side of it per se but am very familiar with the fact of things being saved in the bank and used as ammunition against you in future, so I would say that, with the partner you have, then it's highly unlikely to end well, unfortunately  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Have any of you gone into swinging with your eyes and expectations wide open open but realised afterwards that it was a big mistake
My husband is desperate to meet as a couple (we both have singles profiles) but I don't want to see him with someone else.
He says seeing me with another man would be a real turn on but he gets jealous and has a habit of bringing things up and using them as weapons
Have any of you gone into swinging happily but ended up with it finishing your relationship ? "
"He says seeing me with another man would be a real turn on but he gets jealous and has a habit of bringing things up and using them as weapons"
That is the most telling thing in what you have said. So how does he handle the fact that you both have singles profiles and - one assumes - meet people individually? Do you only meet bi-fems? What about him?
With that one short paragraph, to me you have ruled yourself out of swinging as a couple. Too dangerous. It says to me that you have issues within your relationship which couples-based swinging won't help - in fact, there is a very good chance it will make it worse. Your partners combination of excitement and blame sounds rather childlike. Sorry, but seen this before. Have you tried to turn the tables and told him YOU would like HIM to watch you fuck other men as it's a turn on for YOU?????? What is his reaction then???
Think very, very, very carefully before embarking on couples swinging. You may get meets, but any couple who knows what they are about will spot what's going on and you will find yourself running out of repeat meets...
Think about it very carefully...
 Pork x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Have any of you gone into swinging with your eyes and expectations wide open open but realised afterwards that it was a big mistake
My husband is desperate to meet as a couple (we both have singles profiles) but I don't want to see him with someone else.
He says seeing me with another man would be a real turn on but he gets jealous and has a habit of bringing things up and using them as weapons
Have any of you gone into swinging happily but ended up with it finishing your relationship ? "
I went into swinging like this.. and we are no longer together.. it was soul destroying for me... and I was very broken emotionally when my master met me... It is totally different now...
What we do is for enjoyment together.. Master gets jealous but not in a bad way.. in a mmmmm she is mine.. I need her way... 
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swinging caused a break up for me as i found i prefered women. Bi gfs- be careful what u wish for? Most cpls ive met seem really strong tho x"
Swinging didn't cause your break-up. Your emerging realisation of your true orientation caused that relationship to come to an end. Different thing.
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By *evilwolfCouple
over a year ago
Leicestershire |
"I could never share someone I loved.. wouldnt work for me Im a jealous sort.   "
Sorry to jump over a few but it is possible and it does work.
I think with the OP if there's any sort of problems flare up from anything, then that's the time to stop. If your relationship's not strong before, it certainly wont be afterwards. If it is strong, then it'll become stronger... and the only way to find out is to do it.
I'm not saying people don't stay together for years on not-so-strong relationships for years on end, because they do... just that you need to be very strong to swing as a couple.
Wolf
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I could never share someone I loved.. wouldnt work for me Im a jealous sort.
Sorry to jump over a few but it is possible and it does work.
I think with the OP if there's any sort of problems flare up from anything, then that's the time to stop. If your relationship's not strong before, it certainly wont be afterwards. If it is strong, then it'll become stronger... and the only way to find out is to do it.
I'm not saying people don't stay together for years on not-so-strong relationships for years on end, because they do... just that you need to be very strong to swing as a couple.
Wolf
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+1 and if the strength is not there, you can guarantee Swinging will show up the weaknesses.......
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Although you can never be 100% sure the reality will be fine i think you have to be in yourself with what you actually want. If in any doubt at all i would leave it well alone, sometimes the fantasy is better than the event anyway ! |
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"I could never share someone I loved.. wouldnt work for me Im a jealous sort.
Sorry to jump over a few but it is possible and it does work.
I think with the OP if there's any sort of problems flare up from anything, then that's the time to stop. If your relationship's not strong before, it certainly wont be afterwards. If it is strong, then it'll become stronger... and the only way to find out is to do it.
I'm not saying people don't stay together for years on not-so-strong relationships for years on end, because they do... just that you need to be very strong to swing as a couple.
Wolf
+1 and if the strength is not there, you can guarantee Swinging will show up the weaknesses.......
"
Here lies the truth...
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