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"We wouldn't meet you because you're married, even if you've got permission. But then we don't reply to couples who play separate either."
Fair enough. Seems to be the way for married men not so much for married women |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Married men are a no for me too
Seems to be a lot of women say that. Shame cos couples that play separately is the original form of swinging."
Was it the original form of swinging?
Where did you get that from? |
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"Married men are a no for me too
Seems to be a lot of women say that. Shame cos couples that play separately is the original form of swinging.
Was it the original form of swinging?
Where did you get that from?"
In the modern-day West, the history of swinging is highly contested. Author Terry Gould’s claims in his book ‘The Lifestyle: a look at the erotic rites of swingers’ that the swinging lifestyle started with some adventurous American Air Force fighter pilots & their spouses during the 1940s. It is theorized that with the high mortality rate of fighter pilots during the war years, close supportive bonds were fostered between the young couples so if a spouse was widowed, the network of swinging friends would help assist the widow and her family.
Though a romantic idea, this origin story is likely to be fabricated, and more reliable sources suggest that swinging evolved later. Evidence has been discovered that partner swapping was being practiced by some military couples during the 1950s while the Korean War was going on and continuing afterwards as it slowly started to spread into the suburbs. These small suburban swinger networks kept mailing lists that evolved into some of the members-only swinger clubs which is how it has been traced back to the 1950’s & 1960’s. For more detailed historical information, you can read Dr. Georgia Fuch’s Swingers’ Little Helper book. |
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I would not meet you for the following reasons:-
You’re not my type.
Too far away, I’m in Yorkshire.
I don’t meet married men.
Your pictures are not X Factor, no smiles, you're wearing a silly mask, also showing us your phone.
Boring text, the word ‘professional’.
However I’m sure you are someone’s type.
Good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Married men are a no for me too
Seems to be a lot of women say that. Shame cos couples that play separately is the original form of swinging.
Was it the original form of swinging?
Where did you get that from?
In the modern-day West, the history of swinging is highly contested. Author Terry Gould’s claims in his book ‘The Lifestyle: a look at the erotic rites of swingers’ that the swinging lifestyle started with some adventurous American Air Force fighter pilots & their spouses during the 1940s. It is theorized that with the high mortality rate of fighter pilots during the war years, close supportive bonds were fostered between the young couples so if a spouse was widowed, the network of swinging friends would help assist the widow and her family.
Though a romantic idea, this origin story is likely to be fabricated, and more reliable sources suggest that swinging evolved later. Evidence has been discovered that partner swapping was being practiced by some military couples during the 1950s while the Korean War was going on and continuing afterwards as it slowly started to spread into the suburbs. These small suburban swinger networks kept mailing lists that evolved into some of the members-only swinger clubs which is how it has been traced back to the 1950’s & 1960’s. For more detailed historical information, you can read Dr. Georgia Fuch’s Swingers’ Little Helper book."
It mentions partner swapping, but I can't see where it says about partners playing separately. |
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"Married men are a no for me too
Seems to be a lot of women say that. Shame cos couples that play separately is the original form of swinging.
Was it the original form of swinging?
Where did you get that from?
In the modern-day West, the history of swinging is highly contested. Author Terry Gould’s claims in his book ‘The Lifestyle: a look at the erotic rites of swingers’ that the swinging lifestyle started with some adventurous American Air Force fighter pilots & their spouses during the 1940s. It is theorized that with the high mortality rate of fighter pilots during the war years, close supportive bonds were fostered between the young couples so if a spouse was widowed, the network of swinging friends would help assist the widow and her family.
Though a romantic idea, this origin story is likely to be fabricated, and more reliable sources suggest that swinging evolved later. Evidence has been discovered that partner swapping was being practiced by some military couples during the 1950s while the Korean War was going on and continuing afterwards as it slowly started to spread into the suburbs. These small suburban swinger networks kept mailing lists that evolved into some of the members-only swinger clubs which is how it has been traced back to the 1950’s & 1960’s. For more detailed historical information, you can read Dr. Georgia Fuch’s Swingers’ Little Helper book.
It mentions partner swapping, but I can't see where it says about partners playing separately. "
True,but swapping partners generally evolved playing in separate rooms. Playing separately is an evolution of that concept.
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"I'm not attracted to you, so, ya know?! 
Fair enough, I'm not for everyone
None of us are, sweet! Too many forget this "
Everyone has preferences or different likes and dislikes. I know I'm not classically attractive but I've always done ok for my self |
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"I'm not attracted to you, so, ya know?!
Fair enough, I'm not for everyone
None of us are, sweet! Too many forget this
Everyone has preferences or different likes and dislikes. I know I'm not classically attractive but I've always done ok for my self"
So if that’s the case then why ask us for advice on your profile if it’s not to attract women? |
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"I'm not attracted to you, so, ya know?!
Fair enough, I'm not for everyone
None of us are, sweet! Too many forget this
Everyone has preferences or different likes and dislikes. I know I'm not classically attractive but I've always done ok for my self
So if that’s the case then why ask us for advice on your profile if it’s not to attract women? "
I am asking as my fab life doesn't match my pre marriage life. There seems to be a disconnect and I'm trying to improve my profile to maximise my appeal. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm not attracted to you, so, ya know?!
Fair enough, I'm not for everyone
None of us are, sweet! Too many forget this
Everyone has preferences or different likes and dislikes. I know I'm not classically attractive but I've always done ok for my self
So if that’s the case then why ask us for advice on your profile if it’s not to attract women?
I am asking as my fab life doesn't match my pre marriage life. There seems to be a disconnect and I'm trying to improve my profile to maximise my appeal. "
This comment alone would put me off meeting you tbh. I wouldn't expect anyone who has made the decision to be married to still expect their life to be the same as when they were a bachelor; it implies a lack of maturity (to me). Also you look really moody in your pics and I don't like the word "naughty" in usernames because again, I like maturity.
Sorry but you did ask for brutal honesty... |
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"I'm not attracted to you, so, ya know?!
Fair enough, I'm not for everyone
None of us are, sweet! Too many forget this
Everyone has preferences or different likes and dislikes. I know I'm not classically attractive but I've always done ok for my self
So if that’s the case then why ask us for advice on your profile if it’s not to attract women?
I am asking as my fab life doesn't match my pre marriage life. There seems to be a disconnect and I'm trying to improve my profile to maximise my appeal. "
This is quite an immature attitude and not something a ‘professional’ person would say. From my experience married men are drama. They expect single women to work around their schedule and if the wife turns jealous well that’s another story! Another reason I stay away from married men. |
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"I'm not attracted to you, so, ya know?!
Fair enough, I'm not for everyone
None of us are, sweet! Too many forget this
Everyone has preferences or different likes and dislikes. I know I'm not classically attractive but I've always done ok for my self
So if that’s the case then why ask us for advice on your profile if it’s not to attract women?
I am asking as my fab life doesn't match my pre marriage life. There seems to be a disconnect and I'm trying to improve my profile to maximise my appeal.
This comment alone would put me off meeting you tbh. I wouldn't expect anyone who has made the decision to be married to still expect their life to be the same as when they were a bachelor; it implies a lack of maturity (to me). Also you look really moody in your pics and I don't like the word "naughty" in usernames because again, I like maturity.
Sorry but you did ask for brutal honesty... "
It seems like what I said has been misinterpreted, which is my fault completely. I don't expect my life to be the same, that was misworded. What meant was in public i never had an issue talking to women. I am very aware that I am not the most handsome man anyone has ever met. I guess due to being dyslexic my ability to write and portray my personality in a profile doesn't come across well. Thank you for your feedback i will take it all on board, I appreciate your candor. |
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"I'm not attracted to you, so, ya know?!
Fair enough, I'm not for everyone
None of us are, sweet! Too many forget this
Everyone has preferences or different likes and dislikes. I know I'm not classically attractive but I've always done ok for my self
So if that’s the case then why ask us for advice on your profile if it’s not to attract women?
I am asking as my fab life doesn't match my pre marriage life. There seems to be a disconnect and I'm trying to improve my profile to maximise my appeal.
This is quite an immature attitude and not something a ‘professional’ person would say. From my experience married men are drama. They expect single women to work around their schedule and if the wife turns jealous well that’s another story! Another reason I stay away from married men. "
I feel that I didn't explain my self to the best of my ability and how I meant it in my head and the words that came out in the wrong way. As far as my wife goes there is no jealousy as she sees more men than I see women. I respect your opinion and see why you have your view point. |
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"my profile would put you off meeting me. I need some brutal honesty. It could be race, height, pictures, or profile text. Need some brutal, honest feedback."
Super dull photos, as if zero effort has been made to take a sexy shot.
Nothing about what you write about yourself screams "we need this guy in our sex lives" in fact totally the opposite.
Theres just nothing sexy here at all |
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"my profile would put you off meeting me. I need some brutal honesty. It could be race, height, pictures, or profile text. Need some brutal, honest feedback.
Super dull photos, as if zero effort has been made to take a sexy shot.
Nothing about what you write about yourself screams "we need this guy in our sex lives" in fact totally the opposite.
Theres just nothing sexy here at all"
Thank you for you candor, I will think about how to make changes to my profile to suit. |
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Feedback:
The first pic is quite scary. Looks like you are furious with someone.
The second pic screams ‘lad at a wedding getting p****d up’.
Both not sexy pics.
The text about bondage etc is this for you to be giving or receiving? It’s unclear.
It looks like you have copied text from another members profile.
Nothing on the profile shouts for a lady to message you.
Advice:
Take some photos smiling. Look into the camera with a happy expression, think happy thoughts when doing this. Black and white pics, shirt open thumbs on waistband of nice jeans, shoulders back, tail bone down and smile, no slouching.
Text - tell us about you, tell us what you can offer, tell us what you are into and what you want from this.
I am sure there are ladies on here who will like you OP.
Good luck  |
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"Feedback:
The first pic is quite scary. Looks like you are furious with someone.
The second pic screams ‘lad at a wedding getting p****d up’.
Both not sexy pics.
The text about bondage etc is this for you to be giving or receiving? It’s unclear.
It looks like you have copied text from another members profile.
Nothing on the profile shouts for a lady to message you.
Advice:
Take some photos smiling. Look into the camera with a happy expression, think happy thoughts when doing this. Black and white pics, shirt open thumbs on waistband of nice jeans, shoulders back, tail bone down and smile, no slouching.
Text - tell us about you, tell us what you can offer, tell us what you are into and what you want from this.
I am sure there are ladies on here who will like you OP.
Good luck "
Thanks for the advice. The pictures need to wait as I need to shift the lock down weight first. I actually spent a good hour writing and rewriting my text from scratch so I don't know what to make off that fact you said it looks like I took it off someone else. I'm unsure of how to say what I can offer with out either coming across too forward or unintentionally cocky but I guess I just need to play around with it until I get the balance right. I guess its back to the drawing board |
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Don't understand why you don't swing as a couple with your wife? Couples have a 100 times success rate compared to a single guy. It can't be that hard. Before lockdown thousands of couples were meeting thousands of couples week in week out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Feedback:
The first pic is quite scary. Looks like you are furious with someone.
The second pic screams ‘lad at a wedding getting p****d up’.
Both not sexy pics.
The text about bondage etc is this for you to be giving or receiving? It’s unclear.
It looks like you have copied text from another members profile.
Nothing on the profile shouts for a lady to message you.
Advice:
Take some photos smiling. Look into the camera with a happy expression, think happy thoughts when doing this. Black and white pics, shirt open thumbs on waistband of nice jeans, shoulders back, tail bone down and smile, no slouching.
Text - tell us about you, tell us what you can offer, tell us what you are into and what you want from this.
I am sure there are ladies on here who will like you OP.
Good luck
Thanks for the advice. The pictures need to wait as I need to shift the lock down weight first. I actually spent a good hour writing and rewriting my text from scratch so I don't know what to make off that fact you said it looks like I took it off someone else. I'm unsure of how to say what I can offer with out either coming across too forward or unintentionally cocky but I guess I just need to play around with it until I get the balance right. I guess its back to the drawing board "
Definitely sounds like you're overthinking. Just imagine you're introducing yourself to someone off here who understands your lifestyle and write what comes to mind. Don't make it seem forced. Also carrying a little extra weight does not mean you can't smile or at the very least look relaxed and welcoming in your photos. Good luck OP. |
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"Feedback:
The first pic is quite scary. Looks like you are furious with someone.
The second pic screams ‘lad at a wedding getting p****d up’.
Both not sexy pics.
The text about bondage etc is this for you to be giving or receiving? It’s unclear.
It looks like you have copied text from another members profile.
Nothing on the profile shouts for a lady to message you.
Advice:
Take some photos smiling. Look into the camera with a happy expression, think happy thoughts when doing this. Black and white pics, shirt open thumbs on waistband of nice jeans, shoulders back, tail bone down and smile, no slouching.
Text - tell us about you, tell us what you can offer, tell us what you are into and what you want from this.
I am sure there are ladies on here who will like you OP.
Good luck
Thanks for the advice. The pictures need to wait as I need to shift the lock down weight first. I actually spent a good hour writing and rewriting my text from scratch so I don't know what to make off that fact you said it looks like I took it off someone else. I'm unsure of how to say what I can offer with out either coming across too forward or unintentionally cocky but I guess I just need to play around with it until I get the balance right. I guess its back to the drawing board "
Re my comment about you copying another members text. What I mean is it sounds like other men’s profiles on Fab, nothing different or unique. I know it’s hard but a profile is work in progress....I’m happy for you to message me and I’ll help you with some advice...don’t worry too much. You do seem very polite even with all this brutal feedback |
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"Don't understand why you don't swing as a couple with your wife? Couples have a 100 times success rate compared to a single guy. It can't be that hard. Before lockdown thousands of couples were meeting thousands of couples week in week out."
As we could never agree on couples. Our preferences for meets never lined up. In an ideal world we would find a couple that worked out well for both of us but unfortunately they just don't seem to exist. She's happy meeting on her own(when its safe to do so) and she wants me to meet people. |
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