FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Want to propose swinging to partner
Want to propose swinging to partner
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hi Guys
Im 27 my partner is 26 she is very sexual and open to trying things and deep down she would love the rush of swinging but every time I propose it lightly she jumps to "am i not enough for. you"
Whats the right way to help her be more open to the idea |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm sure she knows her own mind best Op. If she didn't want a monogamous relationship then she would have shown interest in your suggestion. Maybe think on her question to you ' Is she not enough for you ?' |
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"I'm sure she knows her own mind best Op. If she didn't want a monogamous relationship then she would have shown interest in your suggestion. Maybe think on her question to you ' Is she not enough for you ?'"
I agree with your last sentence.
op you aren't listening to her. She is hearing "I want more than you" from you. You need to reassure her for a start and you also need to stop assuming that deep down she'd love swinging, you can't possibly know that.
Take some time to work on your communication skills together and the conversation will happen naturally |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi Guys
Im 27 my partner is 26 she is very sexual and open to trying things and deep down she would love the rush of swinging but every time I propose it lightly she jumps to "am i not enough for. you"
Whats the right way to help her be more open to the idea"
Dump her and get a new one. If she won't swing there's no point being with her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi Guys
Im 27 my partner is 26 she is very sexual and open to trying things and deep down she would love the rush of swinging but every time I propose it lightly she jumps to "am i not enough for. you"
Whats the right way to help her be more open to the idea"
Maybe when you'll decide whether you're 27, 31 or 34 your suggestions to her will appear more decisive or acceptable as well... |
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"Hi Guys
Im 27 my partner is 26 she is very sexual and open to trying things and deep down she would love the rush of swinging but every time I propose it lightly she jumps to "am i not enough for. you"
Whats the right way to help her be more open to the idea"
"am i not enough for. you"
"Do you really think that's why people swing? Because their partners aren't enough for each other." |
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"Hi Guys
Im 27 my partner is 26 she is very sexual and open to trying things and deep down she would love the rush of swinging but every time I propose it lightly she jumps to "am i not enough for. you"
Whats the right way to help her be more open to the idea
Dump her and get a new one. If she won't swing there's no point being with her. "
This |
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By *pice of life 79Man
over a year ago
lincoln, sleaford , grantham , nottingham |
"Hi Guys
Im 27 my partner is 26 she is very sexual and open to trying things and deep down she would love the rush of swinging but every time I propose it lightly she jumps to "am i not enough for. you"
Whats the right way to help her be more open to the idea
"am i not enough for. you"
"Do you really think that's why people swing? Because their partners aren't enough for each other.""
Why do you swing then ? |
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"Hi Guys
Im 27 my partner is 26 she is very sexual and open to trying things and deep down she would love the rush of swinging but every time I propose it lightly she jumps to "am i not enough for. you"
Whats the right way to help her be more open to the idea
"am i not enough for. you"
"Do you really think that's why people swing? Because their partners aren't enough for each other."
Why do you swing then ? "
Nice way to disrespect every couple that you've met. You guys wonder why most couples avoid singles like a plague |
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"Hi Guys
Im 27 my partner is 26 she is very sexual and open to trying things and deep down she would love the rush of swinging but every time I propose it lightly she jumps to "am i not enough for. you"
Whats the right way to help her be more open to the idea
"am i not enough for. you"
"Do you really think that's why people swing? Because their partners aren't enough for each other."
Why do you swing then ? "
Why are you on here? Is your OH not enough for you?
I don't know if you are saying that you agree with your OH's fear that she's not enough for you. If we ever met a couple in which somebody was doing it because the other wasn't enough for them, we'd be horrified and run a mile.
Swinging (as far as we're concerned) is about exploring sex beyond conventional one-to-one relationships, from a positive and consensual perspective. It's not about trying to make up for flaws in relationships. |
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Dont suggest swapping partners suggest going to a club to watch others soft swing then see how or if it progresses at her speed but be ready to accept she may not want to swing . You need to think whats more inportant her or swinging |
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To me it sounds like perhaps you dropped yourself in it, it's not about you and for her to say am "am I not enough" means that she thinks it's just for you. Don't chase after it like a horndog, be open and explain the benefits for her and for you both as a couple. |
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"To me it sounds like perhaps you dropped yourself in it, it's not about you and for her to say am "am I not enough" means that she thinks it's just for you. Don't chase after it like a horndog, be open and explain the benefits for her and for you both as a couple. "
There are no benefits for someone who doesn't want to do it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Turn the question back to her and try to explore her fantasies not yours. You should ask her if shes ever fantasised having more than one guy at the same time... Ie getting both tits sucked at same time. Having her clit and arse licked the same time, wanking two cocks, sucking two cocks at same time. Being split roast or being DPd. She'll probably deny it at first... Again thinging you would say 'aren't i enough for you'. But explain to her that you want her to enjoy herself as much as possible and you would help facilitate any fantasy she has. Focus on her pleasure. If she then does express an interest....set up a couples profile to actively find partners to full fill that interest. At some point she will ask you what you would like to do and then you can share your wants.. Hopefull by then if she sees that she wont loose you as a partner by involving others in your sex life she will be open to your suggestions and not just think its about you shagging more women which is obviously what she thinks swinging means. |
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"Turn the question back to her and try to explore her fantasies not yours. You should ask her if shes ever fantasised having more than one guy at the same time... Ie getting both tits sucked at same time. Having her clit and arse licked the same time, wanking two cocks, sucking two cocks at same time. Being split roast or being DPd. She'll probably deny it at first... Again thinging you would say 'aren't i enough for you'. But explain to her that you want her to enjoy herself as much as possible and you would help facilitate any fantasy she has. Focus on her pleasure. If she then does express an interest....set up a couples profile to actively find partners to full fill that interest. At some point she will ask you what you would like to do and then you can share your wants.. Hopefull by then if she sees that she wont loose you as a partner by involving others in your sex life she will be open to your suggestions and not just think its about you shagging more women which is obviously what she thinks swinging means. "
But what if she doesn't want any of that. Believe it or not there are a lot of women whose fantasies don't involve multiple partners. |
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Swinging is not for everybody ..its very big step to take...maybe you are both young enough to wait and see if happens in the future in some way...dont push it as it may drive you both apart ..be patient ..and talk and be honest about what you BOTH want /like ...good luck |
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After reading similar threads over my years on fab I've come to the conclusion that some people are only truly happy in a swinging relationship. This will cause never ending problems if their partner doesn't want to swing. Neither person is wrong but unless one of them makes a huge compromise or is prepared to have a secret life then they're better off apart.
Loads of suggestions being made to prove to someone that swinging is to their advantage are never going to persuade someone who genuinely is opposed to the idea. Trying to live a monogamous life if you really don't want to isn't going to make a person happy either.
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"Hi Guys
Im 27 my partner is 26 she is very sexual and open to trying things and deep down she would love the rush of swinging but every time I propose it lightly she jumps to "am i not enough for. you"
Whats the right way to help her be more open to the idea"
No, her comment of "am I not enough for you" says lots.
She is obviously not up for swinging and for you to try and pressure her into swinging is very wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s started opening up a little with my gf through conversation too, how can help her fulfill fantasies etc. Slow starts are always better, don’t go straight in with full blown swinging. We started by talking about simply what would be her ultimate fantasy, and just keep probing about what else she’d like. It’s resulted in us being on the lookout for another guy, and if she fancies him, to join us for MFM |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi Guys
Im 27 my partner is 26 she is very sexual and open to trying things and deep down she would love the rush of swinging but every time I propose it lightly she jumps to "am i not enough for. you"
Whats the right way to help her be more open to the idea
No, her comment of "am I not enough for you" says lots.
She is obviously not up for swinging and for you to try and pressure her into swinging is very wrong. "
This....
I think you could be onto a loser here.... |
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