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Dom men in bed
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sounds perfectly reasonable to me. I like a man that can take control in the bedroom. But outside of the bedroom, I want to be equal.
I'm quite lucky. The fb is the kindest funniest guy I know. But in the bedroom, he totally takes control. And it's mind blowing |
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"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch?     "
im a sub and t took me years to find my bf out of the bed room im treated so good do normal things and in bed he has complet control when we play and we do have normal sex to.
but as a dom omg its so so good |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some are genuine doms
Some are sadists, watch out for them
Some are dreamers; never touched a pair of tits
All comes with trust and let the adventures begin x |
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"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch?
im a sub and t took me years to find my bf out of the bed room im treated so good do normal things and in bed he has complet control when we play and we do have normal sex to.
but as a dom omg its so so good "
for me, even though I'm a domme. i always talk to my lover beforehand what our expectations, limits, safe word etc. I'm worried with a dom. i wont get the opportunity or allowed to have these kind of conversation as its not normal part of this sexual relationship? |
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No reason not to have the same kind of discussion beforehand when you want to switch.
Always have the safe word and way out.
You’re a much rarer find as a dome lady though. There aren’t that many of those about.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some are genuine doms
Some are sadists, watch out for them
Some are dreamers; never touched a pair of tits
All comes with trust and let the adventures begin x"
Doms that never touched a pair of tits   |
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"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch? "
You’re not asking too much at all. The most erotic and intense dom relationships I have enjoyed have always been based around what turns the sub on. My excitement comes from exploring and exposing those fantasies, not from any power trip of my own. Nice guy with a twist of kink, that’s me  |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I thought it was always about what the sub wanted but maybe push some limits is thats what the sub wanted?"
Yeah it is , control is first given by the sub not taken by the Dom
I think these guys exist that can be Dom in bed only they are just switch, but play often starts well before the bedroom and builds |
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"I thought it was always about what the sub wanted but maybe push some limits is thats what the sub wanted?
Yeah it is , control is first given by the sub not taken by the Dom
I think these guys exist that can be Dom in bed only they are just switch, but play often starts well before the bedroom and builds "
It’s that giving I find such a turn on. Love the responsibility of being given someone’s fantasies to explore and play with, such a thrill |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Great to read this thread. Having always thought myself far from submissive I’ve met a man who is helping me gently experiment and explore possibilities. I’m finding it hard to believe my luck and to contain my happiness! Life is sooo good!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Great to read this thread. Having always thought myself far from submissive I’ve met a man who is helping me gently experiment and explore possibilities. I’m finding it hard to believe my luck and to contain my happiness! Life is sooo good!!"
Know that feeling...
Enjoy the journey |
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By *arksxMan
over a year ago
Leicester / London |
"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch? "
OP you could answer your question by saying your a looking for a (sexually dominate) man
What you are describing out of it is a control freak |
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"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch?
im a sub and t took me years to find my bf out of the bed room im treated so good do normal things and in bed he has complet control when we play and we do have normal sex to.
but as a dom omg its so so good
for me, even though I'm a domme. i always talk to my lover beforehand what our expectations, limits, safe word etc. I'm worried with a dom. i wont get the opportunity or allowed to have these kind of conversation as its not normal part of this sexual relationship? "
Why shouldn't it work the other way round? As others have said it's about the sub willingly giving control. And for me trust is a huge part of that. If you're not 'allowed' to have those conversations and build that trust then don't take things any further.
Ms x |
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"Being a bedroom bully and bossy outside of the bedroom are two different things "
Yes and neither of those personality I find personally attractive. so every dom I been with and chatted to just haven't appealed to me so far |
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"Some are genuine doms
Some are sadists, watch out for them
Some are dreamers; never touched a pair of tits
All comes with trust and let the adventures begin x"
What key traits do sadist or dreamers have? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m very dominant in the bedroom or can be, people always say it’s a bully or aggressive thing but I like the control but in a nice way. Outside the bedroom I am like a different person, not aggressive, a bully, or anything like that. Just an easy going person who likes to share the company of a woman |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get what you are saying 100%
I would say I’m more masculine in bed than Dom if that make sense?
It’s about being powerful and in charge, it helps if you have the physical presence to go along with it.
I was with a woman that wanted a Dom, but just wasn’t for me. Choking, being a daddy etc like someone said earlier almost sadistic! I feel there is a big difference from that and just being more masculine if you like?? |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I get what you are saying 100%
I would say I’m more masculine in bed than Dom if that make sense?
It’s about being powerful and in charge, it helps if you have the physical presence to go along with it.
I was with a woman that wanted a Dom, but just wasn’t for me. Choking, being a daddy etc like someone said earlier almost sadistic! I feel there is a big difference from that and just being more masculine if you like??"
These are completely different things that’s that why there’s 4 letters in BDSM. Dominance isn’t sadism and isn't just masculinity either, it’s being trusted with control and decisions of agreed things in or out the bedroom. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Absolutely nothing wrong with sadism and sexual control in a sexual setting, or as part of a flowing relationship.
There needs to be an equality of minds and an ability to communicate. Good luck OP. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some are genuine doms
Some are sadists, watch out for them
Some are dreamers; never touched a pair of tits
All comes with trust and let the adventures begin x
Doms that never touched a pair of tits "
Yeah thats my point, not doms at all, just fantasists |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some are genuine doms
Some are sadists, watch out for them
Some are dreamers; never touched a pair of tits
All comes with trust and let the adventures begin x
What key traits do sadist or dreamers have? "
dreamers i.e - people who like the idea, are not doms, just like the thought of it....maybe playing the part.
Sadists, experienced a few on another site, not my thing, im up for a bit of rough, but dont want scarring or permanent damage
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I agree with much of this thread
As a Dom I have no problem combining my domination streak with a sensitive and caring nature
My partners will tell you I command complete control in the bedroom x play room or in scenario based play x
They will also tell you I can be a perfect gentleman
Manners x romantic gestures x a partnership around the home x and everyday gestures as nice txts x hugs and sensitive talk x
I don’t see it as two sides of a coin but simply more of being at ease with all aspect of your desires and emotions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To the OP, i am an experienced switch in the world of BDSM which has a wide variety of flavours. In terms of straight D/s it really and ultimately comes down to the deep needs of each person. It is crucial to understand each others wants, fantasies and limits... and this is always best achieved through conversation and then experimentation. To go from dominant to submissive is not easy because submission is a heightened release by giving up control you normally have. So to start with i suggest you simply do "Domme from the sub position" until you feel comfortable and have the trust in your Dom to allow him/her to take.full control. The elation you will feel at that point is out of this world!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Open Dialogue..all the way through..it changes with every play session My wife and I have. each one of us is looking for a particular type of Vibe..to pardon the pun.. so with constant and open conversation not even before a play session..we could be doing some gardening..or shopping and a subject or move or position or bondage position etc etc..it never really stops with us to perfect our kinks so that each wins..and we are both 50/50 switchs so its even more complicated.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A lot of guys hve little to no idea of what a Dom is.
The truth is in a Dom sub dynamic, the sub holds a lot of the power.
Takes time for a Dom to understated a sub and also to what level she would like to explore.
Sadly many men just see a “Dom” as an easy way to have sex with a submissive and be nasty and forceful, completely not what it’s about at all! :/ |
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As the Ms said. It's about the sub GIVING control to another.
I would advise having a full discussion about likes/dislikes, dos/don'ts. And ALWAYS have a safe word.
Key is to go at YOUR pace and not that of another as this can cause confusion in what you want.
Having discovered my Dom side in the bedroom I try to be a gentleman at all times.
Just be honest and open from the start and you should get exactly what you're looking for.
Mr xx |
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By *atenaWoman
over a year ago
Hyde |
I want an all round Dominant .... not just a bedroom....
I'm naturally submissive - wouldn't guess it as I'm Alpha day to day- but it's just who I am to a Dom that connects with me
So I'll send all my PMs your way and yours to me
Hahahahah |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sounds perfectly reasonable to me. I like a man that can take control in the bedroom. But outside of the bedroom, I want to be equal.
I'm quite lucky. The fb is the kindest funniest guy I know. But in the bedroom, he totally takes control. And it's mind blowing "
This  |
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Like in all relationships its all about the balance..Sexaully a sub in the bedroom would want a dom in the bedroom but a naturally submissive woman may want a dom out of the bedroom as well.
There are levels of what a sub wants/needs and what a dom wants/needs and if theres a balance then your both happy.
But you should have a good idea before you start playing..And a good dom will talk to you alot before play. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The whole issue is the definition of being a Dom and its not just about controlling its about understanding, developing, pushing bounderies. Its all about active communication which alot fail to do or understand.
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
A few points.
If OP wants a dom to satisfy her the way she wants to be satisfied, that could be a job for dominant. If OP wants to direct the dominant in detail, that is topping from the bottom and is not acceptable. It may be acceptable if the dominant has agreed to top, but topping from the bottom would not be acceptable to any dom/domme.
The sadists I know are very safe they are into consensual hurt that is passing. They are not into causing permanent harm. They try to play as safely as possible and put in the work and research to be as safe as possible.
The people to be wary of are the charming psychopaths/sociopaths This is because they know how to manipulate people and don't care what harm they cause.
Also because not all D/S involves impact or sensation play, the narcissists are equally as dangerous to well being but in different ways.
I believe people are entitled to have the relationship they want (abuse excepted).
I don't believe title regulates personality, therefore to be a dom you don't need to be an alpha or assertive.
However, if you ask for a dom you can't expect them to take a submissive role unless it is pre-agreed. If they take the submissive role they are not acting as a dom.
|
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"A few points.
If OP wants a dom to satisfy her the way she wants to be satisfied, that could be a job for dominant. If OP wants to direct the dominant in detail, that is topping from the bottom and is not acceptable. It may be acceptable if the dominant has agreed to top, but topping from the bottom would not be acceptable to any dom/domme.
The sadists I know are very safe they are into consensual hurt that is passing. They are not into causing permanent harm. They try to play as safely as possible and put in the work and research to be as safe as possible.
The people to be wary of are the charming psychopaths/sociopaths This is because they know how to manipulate people and don't care what harm they cause.
Also because not all D/S involves impact or sensation play, the narcissists are equally as dangerous to well being but in different ways.
I believe people are entitled to have the relationship they want (abuse excepted).
I don't believe title regulates personality, therefore to be a dom you don't need to be an alpha or assertive.
However, if you ask for a dom you can't expect them to take a submissive role unless it is pre-agreed. If they take the submissive role they are not acting as a dom.
"
Wise words |
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"Sounds perfectly reasonable to me. I like a man that can take control in the bedroom. But outside of the bedroom, I want to be equal.
I'm quite lucky. The fb is the kindest funniest guy I know. But in the bedroom, he totally takes control. And it's mind blowing "
Definitely this |
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"I want an all round Dominant .... not just a bedroom....
I'm naturally submissive - wouldn't guess it as I'm Alpha day to day- but it's just who I am to a Dom that connects with me
So I'll send all my PMs your way and yours to me
Hahahahah "
sure as I get plenty of doms, who don't really read my profile, your way! |
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
"A few points.
If OP wants a dom to satisfy her the way she wants to be satisfied, that could be a job for dominant. If OP wants to direct the dominant in detail, that is topping from the bottom and is not acceptable. It may be acceptable if the dominant has agreed to top, but topping from the bottom would not be acceptable to any dom/domme.
The sadists I know are very safe they are into consensual hurt that is passing. They are not into causing permanent harm. They try to play as safely as possible and put in the work and research to be as safe as possible.
The people to be wary of are the charming psychopaths/sociopaths This is because they know how to manipulate people and don't care what harm they cause.
Also because not all D/S involves impact or sensation play, the narcissists are equally as dangerous to well being but in different ways.
I believe people are entitled to have the relationship they want (abuse excepted).
I don't believe title regulates personality, therefore to be a dom you don't need to be an alpha or assertive.
However, if you ask for a dom you can't expect them to take a submissive role unless it is pre-agreed. If they take the submissive role they are not acting as a dom.
Wise words "
Thanks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Literally this is exactly what I’m looking for..... seems to be harder than I thought lol
Or you get the guys that say there Dom and think it’s all part of the game not to tell you anything about themselves. Errrr no thanks lol
Had one guy who wouldn’t even send me a face picture .... like honestly ?????
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I want an all round Dominant .... not just a bedroom....
I'm naturally submissive - wouldn't guess it as I'm Alpha day to day- but it's just who I am to a Dom that connects with me
So I'll send all my PMs your way and yours to me
Hahahahah "
Some of the most interesting submissives I’ve met here have been alpha by day, seems to be a release when you are making tough demanding decisions all day, to have someone you trust then choose the restaurant, meal, wine, dress , shoes, make up, hair ... and to be able to do that for someone special who could easily do that themselves feels good, like effortless service not controlling or hard work at all, unlike a needy person |
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By *atenaWoman
over a year ago
Hyde |
"
Some of the most interesting submissives I’ve met here have been alpha by day, seems to be a release when you are making tough demanding decisions all day, to have someone you trust then choose the restaurant, meal, wine, dress , shoes, make up, hair ... and to be able to do that for someone special who could easily do that themselves feels good, like effortless service not controlling or hard work at all, unlike a needy person "
Yessssss.... exactly that!!!!
I can do XYZ... but I submit and give you control
Over me
|
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"
Some of the most interesting submissives I’ve met here have been alpha by day, seems to be a release when you are making tough demanding decisions all day, to have someone you trust then choose the restaurant, meal, wine, dress , shoes, make up, hair ... and to be able to do that for someone special who could easily do that themselves feels good, like effortless service not controlling or hard work at all, unlike a needy person
Yessssss.... exactly that!!!!
I can do XYZ... but I submit and give you control
Over me
"
It’s that ‘being given’ control that makes me love being a Dom. It’s not a power play but much more the excitement of being given such an amazing gift |
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"
Some of the most interesting submissives I’ve met here have been alpha by day, seems to be a release when you are making tough demanding decisions all day, to have someone you trust then choose the restaurant, meal, wine, dress , shoes, make up, hair ... and to be able to do that for someone special who could easily do that themselves feels good, like effortless service not controlling or hard work at all, unlike a needy person
Yessssss.... exactly that!!!!
I can do XYZ... but I submit and give you control
Over me
It’s that ‘being given’ control that makes me love being a Dom. It’s not a power play but much more the excitement of being given such an amazing gift "
So I'm too domme to have a dom in bed? As I like to have total control how things go in the bedroom. |
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Some of the worst are just selfish lovers who have added a label that they think gives them carte blanche to take what they want. There are too many clueless poor lovers who try their chances and the Dom option is 1 that they flock to. Get to know the real person first, I find the chancers soon shy away from deeper human contact |
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A Dom should be respectful to the sub women! Not just think he's gonna do what he wants when he wants and she has no say!!
I'm very dominant, but I'd wanna no limits and do's and don't s!
So if you ask how you want it I believe that's fine, a decent man/Dom would do what you want but in his way still being Dominant!
I believe a Dom is a pleaser and selfless only thinking of her pleaser.
For me i won't stop till she's fully satisfied. When's she's pleased I'm please |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a brat.. and love a Dom but not sure most like Brats. I'm only Bratty sexually, I'm dominant in the day due to my job. I've met one guy that just looked at me in a certain way and I knew I was going to taught a lesson.. love all that lol |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"
Some of the most interesting submissives I’ve met here have been alpha by day, seems to be a release when you are making tough demanding decisions all day, to have someone you trust then choose the restaurant, meal, wine, dress , shoes, make up, hair ... and to be able to do that for someone special who could easily do that themselves feels good, like effortless service not controlling or hard work at all, unlike a needy person
Yessssss.... exactly that!!!!
I can do XYZ... but I submit and give you control
Over me
It’s that ‘being given’ control that makes me love being a Dom. It’s not a power play but much more the excitement of being given such an amazing gift
So I'm too domme to have a dom in bed? As I like to have total control how things go in the bedroom. "
I find it really hard to separate the two. It’s not an act of role play in the bedroom, just an extension of my normal character and the D/s relationship. Don’t think you are too Domme but in the bedroom only , I think a switch can do that. I know someone very submissive in all aspects of life and sex , but has a big fantasy to Dom a man and possibly those partner in the bedroom only, she has no idea what to do and no confidence to do it yet , would be lost for worlds etc but it’s similar, it’s rile play rather than natural |
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"
Some of the most interesting submissives I’ve met here have been alpha by day, seems to be a release when you are making tough demanding decisions all day, to have someone you trust then choose the restaurant, meal, wine, dress , shoes, make up, hair ... and to be able to do that for someone special who could easily do that themselves feels good, like effortless service not controlling or hard work at all, unlike a needy person
Yessssss.... exactly that!!!!
I can do XYZ... but I submit and give you control
Over me
It’s that ‘being given’ control that makes me love being a Dom. It’s not a power play but much more the excitement of being given such an amazing gift
So I'm too domme to have a dom in bed? As I like to have total control how things go in the bedroom.
I find it really hard to separate the two. It’s not an act of role play in the bedroom, just an extension of my normal character and the D/s relationship. Don’t think you are too Domme but in the bedroom only , I think a switch can do that. I know someone very submissive in all aspects of life and sex , but has a big fantasy to Dom a man and possibly those partner in the bedroom only, she has no idea what to do and no confidence to do it yet , would be lost for worlds etc but it’s similar, it’s rile play rather than natural "
I was chatting to my dom lover the other day, talking about my kinks. He pointed out the reasons he never do them. So my sexual preferences would never be fulfilled by him. |
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By *ilth84Man
over a year ago
Stafford |
Forgive me if I am wrong but isnt the dom/sub relationship based on the illusion of power and control?
Where each party consents, the submissive gives consent for the control over them and the dom respects the boundries put in place.
Being submissive surely does not give full reign for the dominant to act or do whatever they please without prior agreement between the partys involved?
I would think communication and consent would be paramount to these dynamics otherwise this would just be narcissistic and abusive? |
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"
Some of the most interesting submissives I’ve met here have been alpha by day, seems to be a release when you are making tough demanding decisions all day, to have someone you trust then choose the restaurant, meal, wine, dress , shoes, make up, hair ... and to be able to do that for someone special who could easily do that themselves feels good, like effortless service not controlling or hard work at all, unlike a needy person
Yessssss.... exactly that!!!!
I can do XYZ... but I submit and give you control
Over me
It’s that ‘being given’ control that makes me love being a Dom. It’s not a power play but much more the excitement of being given such an amazing gift
So I'm too domme to have a dom in bed? As I like to have total control how things go in the bedroom.
I find it really hard to separate the two. It’s not an act of role play in the bedroom, just an extension of my normal character and the D/s relationship. Don’t think you are too Domme but in the bedroom only , I think a switch can do that. I know someone very submissive in all aspects of life and sex , but has a big fantasy to Dom a man and possibly those partner in the bedroom only, she has no idea what to do and no confidence to do it yet , would be lost for worlds etc but it’s similar, it’s rile play rather than natural
I was chatting to my dom lover the other day, talking about my kinks. He pointed out the reasons he never do them. So my sexual preferences would never be fulfilled by him. "
Wow ... time for an upgrade |
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"Forgive me if I am wrong but isnt the dom/sub relationship based on the illusion of power and control?
Where each party consents, the submissive gives consent for the control over them and the dom respects the boundries put in place.
Being submissive surely does not give full reign for the dominant to act or do whatever they please without prior agreement between the partys involved?
I would think communication and consent would be paramount to these dynamics otherwise this would just be narcissistic and abusive? "
yes exactly but there men who think the latter is dom and sub relationship which I stay way clear from. I'm personally more domme than sub so generally go for subs. I occasionally meet doms, they have their strengths but I find they're usually very dominate outside the bedroom and often don't share my kinks so I feel frustrated. Thank God we can have more than one lover, eh!
I like to find a kinky dom for a good change in my sex life to see how much I would like it. |
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By *lut-annaTV/TS
over a year ago
Central London/ St Pancrass |
Seems completely normal and reasonable. You want a partner in life where you can feel valued and treated as equal but become his kinky submissive in the bedroom. There are Doms like that. They are just hard to find! Don't lower your expectations, keep looking! |
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"
Some of the most interesting submissives I’ve met here have been alpha by day, seems to be a release when you are making tough demanding decisions all day, to have someone you trust then choose the restaurant, meal, wine, dress , shoes, make up, hair ... and to be able to do that for someone special who could easily do that themselves feels good, like effortless service not controlling or hard work at all, unlike a needy person
Yessssss.... exactly that!!!!
I can do XYZ... but I submit and give you control
Over me
It’s that ‘being given’ control that makes me love being a Dom. It’s not a power play but much more the excitement of being given such an amazing gift
So I'm too domme to have a dom in bed? As I like to have total control how things go in the bedroom. "
I think you are Jasmine yes. For the dynamic to work someone has to take control. |
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
"I would love to find a don male that understands I don't like pain but love restraints and breath play
Its a very hard thing to find !"
I think there are plenty who understand that.
I suspect too many subs look for the stereotypes and choose from the picture, rather than getting out there (precovid) and getting to know people who don't fit the stereotype but could deliver. |
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"I would love to find a don male that understands I don't like pain but love restraints and breath play
Its a very hard thing to find !
I think there are plenty who understand that.
I suspect too many subs look for the stereotypes and choose from the picture, rather than getting out there (precovid) and getting to know people who don't fit the stereotype but could deliver."
Isn't alot of the time, initial attraction based on looks online. For me, I know how a true submissive guy talks to me to prove he is submissive |
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
If it is kink play, physical attraction is not a major driver for me. The key thing is they do the see the fun in kink. Online, I tend to contact people on the basis of a response in a thread, or comments in their profile.
Even then, because there are different types of submissives, just because someone says they are submissive and can talk the talk there is no guarantee that we are looking for the same thing. It is then a case of going through a process to ensure you are both looking for the same kind of play at the same intensity.
Also, if the sub requires aftercare and time to recover, are they the kind of person you want to socialise with whilst their return to an even kèel. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Be clear what you what from the beginning. You want to be controlled in the bedroom but you are a strong, independent woman outside that arena. You will fine him at some point xxx |
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A dominant male would probably be the person you’d least expect.
He’d could be the quiet assuming nerd, polite and intuitive. Maybe a shelf stacker or delivery driver
And not the guy who appears confident at work and leads a team .
When I’ve chatted to submissive people male or female . They are usually managers or have very stressful jobs . They want to be free from the pressures of their day to day life and let someone else take over in the bedroom .
Maybe explain what you’d like in your profile .
It doesn’t tell me you’re remotely submissive or that you’re looking for a dominant partner .
Aside from that good luck |
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"A dominant male would probably be the person you’d least expect.
He’d could be the quiet assuming nerd, polite and intuitive. Maybe a shelf stacker or delivery driver
And not the guy who appears confident at work and leads a team .
When I’ve chatted to submissive people male or female . They are usually managers or have very stressful jobs . They want to be free from the pressures of their day to day life and let someone else take over in the bedroom .
Maybe explain what you’d like in your profile .
It doesn’t tell me you’re remotely submissive or that you’re looking for a dominant partner .
Aside from that good luck "
lol because I'm not submissive at all... just wondering if abit of change do me good
tbh submissive bi men are the hottest men I encountered. |
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By *omvampmMan
over a year ago
gillingham |
"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch? "
Bossy and agreesive controlling types are not Doms. They are bully's and idiots a good Dom has empathy respect and gains trust op you just need to chose carefully a switch may be what you need as their understanding and respect will be from both perspectives but a good genuine Dom will respect your wishes and keep it to the bedroom at levels that you are happy and contempt with only pushing boundaries with your prior agreement and understanding once trust is gained x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's perfectly usual to establish boundaries, what you like, want to try. Bringing a Dom dosnt exclude this normal activity of communicating with a partner.
Men can do this lol
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A lot of guys hve little to no idea of what a Dom is.
The truth is in a Dom sub dynamic, the sub holds a lot of the power.
Takes time for a Dom to understated a sub and also to what level she would like to explore.
Sadly many men just see a “Dom” as an easy way to have sex with a submissive and be nasty and forceful, completely not what it’s about at all! :/"
 |
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"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch?
Bossy and agreesive controlling types are not Doms. They are bully's and idiots a good Dom has empathy respect and gains trust op you just need to chose carefully a switch may be what you need as their understanding and respect will be from both perspectives but a good genuine Dom will respect your wishes and keep it to the bedroom at levels that you are happy and contempt with only pushing boundaries with your prior agreement and understanding once trust is gained x"
yes that's the domme I am. i always discuss what they enjoy and makes them really horny before any play. what are their limits etc then let the fun begin. but with men in the past, they force me to do things i dont really enjoy. they never ask me if it feels good etc. just literally bullies in bed  |
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By *arksxMan
over a year ago
Leicester / London |
"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch?
Bossy and agreesive controlling types are not Doms. They are bully's and idiots a good Dom has empathy respect and gains trust op you just need to chose carefully a switch may be what you need as their understanding and respect will be from both perspectives but a good genuine Dom will respect your wishes and keep it to the bedroom at levels that you are happy and contempt with only pushing boundaries with your prior agreement and understanding once trust is gained x
yes that's the domme I am. i always discuss what they enjoy and makes them really horny before any play. what are their limits etc then let the fun begin. but with men in the past, they force me to do things i dont really enjoy. they never ask me if it feels good etc. just literally bullies in bed "
If you are a good dom in bed and knows what that feels like...
Why expect anything less just because it's a man?
If they are shit bullies. Tell them you have experience in being a dom and they are not meeting your standards.
You'll find most bullies don't like it when you use their tactics back on them. |
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By *omvampmMan
over a year ago
gillingham |
"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch?
Bossy and agreesive controlling types are not Doms. They are bully's and idiots a good Dom has empathy respect and gains trust op you just need to chose carefully a switch may be what you need as their understanding and respect will be from both perspectives but a good genuine Dom will respect your wishes and keep it to the bedroom at levels that you are happy and contempt with only pushing boundaries with your prior agreement and understanding once trust is gained x
yes that's the domme I am. i always discuss what they enjoy and makes them really horny before any play. what are their limits etc then let the fun begin. but with men in the past, they force me to do things i dont really enjoy. they never ask me if it feels good etc. just literally bullies in bed "
No one likes a bully or should put up with them beautiful x stand your ground and only take things further with someone your comfortable with and trust then you can enjoy the experience without that concern at the back of your mind if they don't treat you like you would treat your subs with empathy and trust then there not a Dom. Take your time and your find the guy your looking for beautiful x |
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"Some are genuine doms
Some are sadists, watch out for them
Some are dreamers; never touched a pair of tits
All comes with trust and let the adventures begin x"
I (Mr Icebreaker) am sadistic - I get sexual pleasure form inflicting pain. I also absolutely believe in consent, and have no interest in, and take no pleasure from, hurting anyone who is not aroused by that. I don't know why anyone would have to watch out for me. |
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
"Some are genuine doms
Some are sadists, watch out for them
Some are dreamers; never touched a pair of tits
All comes with trust and let the adventures begin xI (Mr Icebreaker) am sadistic - I get sexual pleasure form inflicting pain. I also absolutely believe in consent, and have no interest in, and take no pleasure from, hurting anyone who is not aroused by that. I don't know why anyone would have to watch out for me."
I get really tired on this site. There are many people on this site (and off this site) who recite the same mantras without thinking them through.
Too many doms saying their kind of domination is the only true or genuine domination. Also subs saying the kind of dominant they want is the only kind of dominant.
There are too many competing ideologies trying to impose a definition of "true domination or true submission". There are ideologies that say domination by men of women is abuse dressed up; (and don't get me into the race arguments in regard to domination).
These days there is very little "your kink is not my kink but I respect your right to do it, even if I hate it" Obviously with consent and without abuse.
Which is a long way of saying, very few people on here bother to understand the difference between a sadist and psychopath/sociopath. Even fewer a sadist and a narcissistic sadist. I have met both and I would not trust the latter an inch with a sub. I know a number of sadists that I would recommend to the right person.
p.s sadism is no longer a paraphilia if it does not involve lasting har m.
Sorry to hijack but just tired.
|
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"Some are genuine doms
Some are sadists, watch out for them
Some are dreamers; never touched a pair of tits
All comes with trust and let the adventures begin xI (Mr Icebreaker) am sadistic - I get sexual pleasure form inflicting pain. I also absolutely believe in consent, and have no interest in, and take no pleasure from, hurting anyone who is not aroused by that. I don't know why anyone would have to watch out for me.
I get really tired on this site. There are many people on this site (and off this site) who recite the same mantras without thinking them through.
Too many doms saying their kind of domination is the only true or genuine domination. Also subs saying the kind of dominant they want is the only kind of dominant.
There are too many competing ideologies trying to impose a definition of "true domination or true submission". There are ideologies that say domination by men of women is abuse dressed up; (and don't get me into the race arguments in regard to domination).
These days there is very little "your kink is not my kink but I respect your right to do it, even if I hate it" Obviously with consent and without abuse.
Which is a long way of saying, very few people on here bother to understand the difference between a sadist and psychopath/sociopath. Even fewer a sadist and a narcissistic sadist. I have met both and I would not trust the latter an inch with a sub. I know a number of sadists that I would recommend to the right person.
p.s sadism is no longer a paraphilia if it does not involve lasting har m.
Sorry to hijack but just tired.
"
no voice it, i dont mind |
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
"Some are genuine doms
Some are sadists, watch out for them
Some are dreamers; never touched a pair of tits
All comes with trust and let the adventures begin xI (Mr Icebreaker) am sadistic - I get sexual pleasure form inflicting pain. I also absolutely believe in consent, and have no interest in, and take no pleasure from, hurting anyone who is not aroused by that. I don't know why anyone would have to watch out for me.
I get really tired on this site. There are many people on this site (and off this site) who recite the same mantras without thinking them through.
Too many doms saying their kind of domination is the only true or genuine domination. Also subs saying the kind of dominant they want is the only kind of dominant.
There are too many competing ideologies trying to impose a definition of "true domination or true submission". There are ideologies that say domination by men of women is abuse dressed up; (and don't get me into the race arguments in regard to domination).
These days there is very little "your kink is not my kink but I respect your right to do it, even if I hate it" Obviously with consent and without abuse.
Which is a long way of saying, very few people on here bother to understand the difference between a sadist and psychopath/sociopath. Even fewer a sadist and a narcissistic sadist. I have met both and I would not trust the latter an inch with a sub. I know a number of sadists that I would recommend to the right person.
p.s sadism is no longer a paraphilia if it does not involve lasting har m.
Sorry to hijack but just tired.
no voice it, i dont mind "
|
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"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch?
Bossy and agreesive controlling types are not Doms. They are bully's and idiots a good Dom has empathy respect and gains trust op you just need to chose carefully a switch may be what you need as their understanding and respect will be from both perspectives but a good genuine Dom will respect your wishes and keep it to the bedroom at levels that you are happy and contempt with only pushing boundaries with your prior agreement and understanding once trust is gained x
yes that's the domme I am. i always discuss what they enjoy and makes them really horny before any play. what are their limits etc then let the fun begin. but with men in the past, they force me to do things i dont really enjoy. they never ask me if it feels good etc. just literally bullies in bed
No one likes a bully or should put up with them beautiful x stand your ground and only take things further with someone your comfortable with and trust then you can enjoy the experience without that concern at the back of your mind if they don't treat you like you would treat your subs with empathy and trust then there not a Dom. Take your time and your find the guy your looking for beautiful x"
Thanks... cross fingers he come soon |
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By *omvampmMan
over a year ago
gillingham |
"I only dated afew in my time and never quite enjoyed them. But like with all things, there's different degrees of Domming. Am I asking too much if I want a dom to do exactly how I want in bed and not bossy outside the bedroom?
The reason I'm curious about finding a Dom is I like the kinky assertiveness and strength of a guy in bed but not the bossy controlling type. Shall I just stick to submissive men or find a switch?
Bossy and agreesive controlling types are not Doms. They are bully's and idiots a good Dom has empathy respect and gains trust op you just need to chose carefully a switch may be what you need as their understanding and respect will be from both perspectives but a good genuine Dom will respect your wishes and keep it to the bedroom at levels that you are happy and contempt with only pushing boundaries with your prior agreement and understanding once trust is gained x
yes that's the domme I am. i always discuss what they enjoy and makes them really horny before any play. what are their limits etc then let the fun begin. but with men in the past, they force me to do things i dont really enjoy. they never ask me if it feels good etc. just literally bullies in bed
No one likes a bully or should put up with them beautiful x stand your ground and only take things further with someone your comfortable with and trust then you can enjoy the experience without that concern at the back of your mind if they don't treat you like you would treat your subs with empathy and trust then there not a Dom. Take your time and your find the guy your looking for beautiful x
Thanks... cross fingers he come soon "
hope so to x although kents not to far away I guess xx have fun and stay safe beautiful x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I love to Dom but gently and confidently and with respect. Big difference in giving your partner a powerful experience within boundaries to being aggressively forceful. Having said that a massive turn on is when a woman tells you it “hurts nice” |
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