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Premature Ejaculation
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Thing is OP what do you define as premature?
A lot of guys think they suffer from it when actually the average length a guy lasts with full penetration is between 5 and 15 minutes - if you're less than that, first thing I'd suggest is talk to a Doctor just to be sure there are no underlying issues.
If there are none, it doesn't have to be a problem though, particularly if you find an understanding partner.
Is it just with penetrative sex that it happens? Or a specific position or activity? If so, maybe try avoiding them, sex doesn't *have* to be all about penetration and there are any number of ways to have mutually pleasurable sex without it.
Sadly when PE does strike it can be a self-fulfilling prophecy in the more you think about it the more it happens - so finding ways to relax and take your mind off it though a cliche is a way to prolong things.
Have you tried edging? Where you masturbate to almost the point of orgasm and stop, then repeat? It's another way of learning to control and prolong things.
Trying not to get frustrated is also key, which I know is easier said than done but it *will* only make things worse whereas if you take an "it happens" approach and focus on pleasuring your partner in other ways if it does then it starts to become easier to cope with.
Also important is being able to talk about it with a partner, let them know it may happen but that if it does it doesn't mean game over - the overwhelming majority of women are understanding trust me.
You have my sympathy though and know exactly how it feels and despite what you may think you're not alone - although the perception here may be of all the other guys being studs who can "go all night" that's far far from the truth.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Being relatively new to the scene, we’d both like to try a FFM, I (Mr) am dreading this as it’s on my fantasy list an I’m fearful the excitement will just push me over the edge.
If it does happen I’ll just say crack on, I’ve won as there’s no prize for coming second or third. Lol. |
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"Thing is OP what do you define as premature?
A lot of guys think they suffer from it when actually the average length a guy lasts with full penetration is between 5 and 15 minutes - if you're less than that, first thing I'd suggest is talk to a Doctor just to be sure there are no underlying issues.
If there are none, it doesn't have to be a problem though, particularly if you find an understanding partner.
Is it just with penetrative sex that it happens? Or a specific position or activity? If so, maybe try avoiding them, sex doesn't *have* to be all about penetration and there are any number of ways to have mutually pleasurable sex without it.
Sadly when PE does strike it can be a self-fulfilling prophecy in the more you think about it the more it happens - so finding ways to relax and take your mind off it though a cliche is a way to prolong things.
Have you tried edging? Where you masturbate to almost the point of orgasm and stop, then repeat? It's another way of learning to control and prolong things.
Trying not to get frustrated is also key, which I know is easier said than done but it *will* only make things worse whereas if you take an "it happens" approach and focus on pleasuring your partner in other ways if it does then it starts to become easier to cope with.
Also important is being able to talk about it with a partner, let them know it may happen but that if it does it doesn't mean game over - the overwhelming majority of women are understanding trust me.
You have my sympathy though and know exactly how it feels and despite what you may think you're not alone - although the perception here may be of all the other guys being studs who can "go all night" that's far far from the truth.
" . We are looking at 10 seconds once in I don't cum that fast with foreplay |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
" We are looking at 10 seconds once in I don't cum that fast with foreplay "
So it's likely to be in your head - so maybe focus on foreplay more and getting as relaxed as you can - try and push any thoughts of cumming out of your head helps too - which I know is easier said than done but I find when I'm able to relax my mind it helps.
Trying edging is worth a go too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I was at a workshop a few years ago. And one of the topics was premature ejaculation. Which a lot of men have.
I had the same problem. I'd ejaculate in less than 3 mins of stimulations. Now it I can control it to the point of no ejaculation at all. With multiple orgasm's that last up to 4 hour's. And after each orgasm's just gets deeper and the feelings and sensitivity is higher. I don't even feel tired. But I need more!
The trick is to learn and know when you're about to ejaculate but stop just before it happens. You need to learn to feel the seman flowing and being present in your sex. Repeat this 5 time's. Practice practice practice. Try to touch other parts of your body and not just your sex. Play around. Try to feel your feminine side. This is so important. In Tantra man and woman are one.
It's as much mental as physical.
'The art of sexual ecstasy' by Margot Anand. I've been studying Tantra for the past four years. |
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By *ussD1Man
over a year ago
Gloucester |
"Thing is OP what do you define as premature?
A lot of guys think they suffer from it when actually the average length a guy lasts with full penetration is between 5 and 15 minutes - if you're less than that, first thing I'd suggest is talk to a Doctor just to be sure there are no underlying issues.
If there are none, it doesn't have to be a problem though, particularly if you find an understanding partner.
Is it just with penetrative sex that it happens? Or a specific position or activity? If so, maybe try avoiding them, sex doesn't *have* to be all about penetration and there are any number of ways to have mutually pleasurable sex without it.
Sadly when PE does strike it can be a self-fulfilling prophecy in the more you think about it the more it happens - so finding ways to relax and take your mind off it though a cliche is a way to prolong things.
Have you tried edging? Where you masturbate to almost the point of orgasm and stop, then repeat? It's another way of learning to control and prolong things.
Trying not to get frustrated is also key, which I know is easier said than done but it *will* only make things worse whereas if you take an "it happens" approach and focus on pleasuring your partner in other ways if it does then it starts to become easier to cope with.
Also important is being able to talk about it with a partner, let them know it may happen but that if it does it doesn't mean game over - the overwhelming majority of women are understanding trust me.
You have my sympathy though and know exactly how it feels and despite what you may think you're not alone - although the perception here may be of all the other guys being studs who can "go all night" that's far far from the truth.
"
This. A very sensible and thought out response. I’m not sure I ever considered myself a PE but maybe i am? I’m no marathon man that’s for sure. I’ve used much of the above to help stay in the game so to speak. Interesting thread and I’d suggest three times, even if quick, intermingled with humour and fore play is a good night. ![](/icons/s/wink.gif) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have had a problem with Premature Ejaculation for a long time. Has any one tried prillgy pills and dose it work? "
Perhaps an appointment with your GP to discuss the problem maybe appropriate. Just a thought? |
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By *annahHeartsWoman
over a year ago
Wherever I want to be!!!! |
"I find premature ejaculation quite hot in the “ruined orgasm” scenario to be honest.
Although i can see how it can be frustrating. It just turns me on
Oh if more women thought that lol "
I think you’d be surprised - I find it quite a compliment if a guy can’t stop it happening - as long as he’s still hungry to satisfy me after while he recharges - we are A1!!!!!
It’s when the PE happens and he just loses interest that I get frustrated.
I once sucked a guy to 2 orgasms within a minute of each other... full shoots... fucking loved it!!!!
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By *ifty69Man
over a year ago
north tyneside |
"I find premature ejaculation quite hot in the “ruined orgasm” scenario to be honest.
Although i can see how it can be frustrating. It just turns me on
Oh if more women thought that lol
I think you’d be surprised - I find it quite a compliment if a guy can’t stop it happening - as long as he’s still hungry to satisfy me after while he recharges - we are A1!!!!!
It’s when the PE happens and he just loses interest that I get frustrated.
I once sucked a guy to 2 orgasms within a minute of each other... full shoots... fucking loved it!!!!
" ![](/icons/thumb_up.png) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I find premature ejaculation quite hot in the “ruined orgasm” scenario to be honest.
Although i can see how it can be frustrating. It just turns me on
Oh if more women thought that lol
I think you’d be surprised - I find it quite a compliment if a guy can’t stop it happening - as long as he’s still hungry to satisfy me after while he recharges - we are A1!!!!!
It’s when the PE happens and he just loses interest that I get frustrated.
I once sucked a guy to 2 orgasms within a minute of each other... full shoots... fucking loved it!!!!
"
Record breaker! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Practice edging for at least 5 time's a day everyday. Take note of how long you can last each time. So the first session you will probably reach the edge in around 3 mins. That's 15 mins total. After a few weeks to months of practice you'll notice you can now last 5 mins each edge. That's 25 mins. Make sure you're totally physically and mentally relaxed. Learn to embrace your entire body. Then total 10 mins, total 50 mins.
What you must understand is that it's both a physical and mental problem. So you must address both aspects of this. Learn to embrace self pleasure. Overcome any guilt ect. Learn to embrace your feminine side... |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
"I find premature ejaculation quite hot in the “ruined orgasm” scenario to be honest.
Although i can see how it can be frustrating. It just turns me on
Oh if more women thought that lol
I think you’d be surprised - I find it quite a compliment if a guy can’t stop it happening - as long as he’s still hungry to satisfy me after while he recharges - we are A1!!!!!
It’s when the PE happens and he just loses interest that I get frustrated.
"
Exactly!
I don’t care how fast the guy takes to cum (and I delight in deliberately getting a guy to cum fast!) so long as they don’t just roll over and go to sleep.
I need to cum too. How they make that happen I don’t really care ![](/icons/s/twisted.gif) |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I think it's definitely a two way thing though and part of overcoming the mental aspect of it comes down to communication and finding a partner who is understanding, as much as it is about understanding yourself and not getting stressed about it.
If a partner makes you feel pressured to perform, then chances are it will become frustrating - if they take an "it happens, don't worry" approach and you're relaxed enough to feel the same and just concentrate on them for a while it's surprising how not only does the problem reduce but how much more relaxed and confident you become, and how soon you recover to go again.
I'm quite open with people I meet that I can be a little quick at times, but tell them it doesn't mean game over if it happens and can honestly say they've all been understanding and we've had some great times.
As I think I said further up, the problem on sites like this is it's easy to get the perception that all the other guys are superstuds who can go all night, staying hard the whole time, when reality couldn't be further from that.
Relaxing the brain and finding partners you can be comfortable with is the key, as is not focussing on penetrative sex as the end goal. |
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