The first thing I did was just to run quickly down the messages, applying the filters we had agreed.
Twelve guys without pictures were deleted, one guy four times.
We agreed that 'an hour away' meant Chester, Liverpool and maybe Manchester, for the right person. The whole of North Wales was in, down to Shrewsbury, which was technically a bit further, but only just and didn't feel like it would be too far.
So down the list I went. Delete, delete, delete.
In the end she had thirty messages, with more still coming in.
"Right" I said "start at the bottom, with the oldest messages, or work down from the top?"
My wife, always the advocate of fair play, said "Start at the bottom then. It's only fair"
I laughed and said it wasn't a job interview and we didn't have to follow HR guidelines, but she stuck with her decision.
The first guy was 25. Only just within her age limit. He was in Bangor, about thirty minutes away. His message just said that he was a fit young guy who liked older women. Not a great choice of words. My wife asked me to look at the pictures he had included. I don't know if she was really considering him, or whether she just wanted to look at them.
He was good looking, but boyish and looked younger than 25. He was fit though, his lean torso and six pack proudly displayed in the second photo. Finally, after a cock bulge, we got to his cock. Straight as a ruler and quite long I would guess, but also quite thin.
"Hmmm..." She said, pondering. "I don't know. It's weird sitting here, thinking 'do I want to let him fuck me?' and 'do I want that cock?' I don't know... He is a nice guy, but I think he is too young."
She looked at me, as if she had to explain every decision, back it up with a reason.
"Not for the first time." she continued "I think I would prefer someone older. Is that OK?"
"You don't have to ask me. This is for you. And you don't have to justify every decision either. So, you want someone more experienced?"
"Not necessarily experienced. I don't want the 40 Yr old virgin. But just someone who will be able to look after me and take control."
She added hastily "I don't mean tie me up or anything. I just mean I'll be nervous, so, you know..." she shrugged
I did know. "OK, so not this guy."
"No. Maybe in the future. I quite like the idea of being a cougar" she laughed "but no. Actually, I don't like the 'older women' line. So delete him"
"Right then... If you are looking for someone older for your first guy, we can narrow down the list even further. What age would you say?"
She pulled a face, nodding her head from side to side, thinking about it.
"I would say... Someone older than me... So say... 45 to 55"
"Ok"
She quickly added "but don't delete the others. I might want to meet someone a different age later"
"I won't. You can look through the rest yourself another time"
So I scanned upwards, looking for messages from guys in that age range.
The first message I found was from a man who wanted to breed her
"What does that mean? Is it what I think?" she screwed her face up in distaste.
"Yeah, I think so"
"I'm 43, for God's sake. What makes him think I want a baby. And from him!"
"I think he probably just gets off on the thought that you are willing to let him try and impregnate you. That you will let him cum inside you, but... that you also have a thought in your head that you are willing to risk getting pregnant by him, even if you probably won't"
"Well I don't want to. I don't want any of that from him, thank you" and she reached over and pressed the delete herself.
The next guy just wanted her panties. And the next guy wrote in great detail about how he would inflict 'delicious pain and torture on her'
When the next guy didn't look like he had any teeth and the guy after him wanted her to crap on him, she was about ready to quit the whole thing and stick with women.
"What is wrong with people? Men! Jesus Christ, what's wrong with just wanting to shag a woman?!"
"Yeah, I know" I prayed that the next guy just wanted to shag her.
He did. His message was polite, and respectful, but confident. He was a single guy, recently divorced and looking for 'NSA' fun"
"What's NSA? Is that some kinky shit too?"
I laughed, "I'm guessing it means 'No Strings Attached', he doesn't want a relationship, in other words"
"Oh, that's OK then. And yes 'NSA' would be good then"
She looked at me semi-suspiciously "how did you know that?"
"I've always been good at working out acronyms"
"Clever sod, aren't you" and I got a peck on the cheek for it.
Turning back to the phone, she asked to look at his pics. There was a face pic, he was reasonably attractive, I guess, and looked in good shape. There was a pic of his torso, and one of him naked from the back, but no cock pic.
"He seems nice. Can you hotlist him."
I suddenly remembered that she had already figured out how the hotlist worked.
I did as she asked and her hotlist came up, with the new guy and Mr Curved Cock from Chester.
"Who's this guy?" I asked.
"Oh, I forgot about him. I tried doing a search and he came up."
"So you must have liked him to hotlist him. Would you consider him now?"
"Honestly? I think I just saved him because his cock looked amazing."
She bit, her bottom lip, she was embarrassed again. I wondered what it was about saying that, about this guy, that suddenly embarrassed her. Unless she had been thinking about him, about taking his cock.
I played along. "Big, you mean?"
"No, I'm not bothered by that. It was the shape"
Of course I had to pretend to want to see. I called up his pics and found the cock shot.
"I've never had one like that. I didn't know you could get ones like that!" she said and laughed, "I could just imagine what that would feel like going inside me"
It was obvious from her body language, the way she crossed her legs, that the thought of it was arousing. It was as though she was imagining taking it in right then. I knew then that she wanted this guy and that one day, soon, unless he was, well, a cock, he would have her.
I asked again if she wanted to consider him for her first meet, but she said she didn't want him now, she wanted to stick with her stated age range.
I noted the 'now' though.
Eventually, over the course of the evening, we got through the list and ended up with a shortlist of five men. All added to her hotlist and all likely to get lucky in the near future by my reckoning.
"So what happens now?" she asked.
"Well I guess you respond to their messages and take it from there. You can chat with them for a bit, see how you get on with them, ask them for more info about what they are looking for, tell them what you are looking for etc."
She pointed to the first guy we had hotlisted "Why has he got a blue dot there now? Does that mean he is online now?"
"Must do"
"Come on then, let's do it. Send him a message. What should I say?"
"I don't know, say 'hi, thanks for the message' , you like his pictures, you are looking for no strings too. Whatever"
So she sent him back a short message. We could see that he had read it and, after a short wait, a message came back.
He said that he was called Andrew and that he loved her pics. He said that he loved her bum and that she had lovely breasts. She was impressed that he didn't say 'tits' straight away.
She replied, complimenting him on his pics and asking where he lived. His profile just said 'North Wales' . He was just outside Wrexham, near the border with Cheshire in a small village.
They swapped a few more pleasantries and he asked if she had Kik. She asked me if I should give him her username. I said it was probably the fastest way to find out if she liked him or not, without actually meeting him.
She gave him her username. Then she opened Kik and tucked her legs under her, settling down to chat with him.
At that point I thought I would leave her to it. I said I was going up to bed and to let me know how she got on.
She beamed at me as I left and silently mouthed "thank you"
I knew for certain then, that even if it wasn't this guy, for whatever reason, pretty soon my wife was going to have another cock inside her married pussy...
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