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un attractive....
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so a bit of a back story.
I met my ex when I was 22 and he was 40 (yes I know... and no there are no daddy issues lol he just drew me in somehow) we had an amazing sex life and he introduced me to swinging (I was so vanilla before hand I hadn't even heard of swinging!)
we were together for 3 yrs but split up due to infidelity (yeah why cheat when you can swing, I didn't get it either)
so I stayed on this site and spoke to many people and also had a few flings along the way but nothing serious.
I just got to the point of thinking I'll be forever a single swinger when I met my now husband at 31. he isn't into the scene so I stopped coming on here and my life carried on. 2 kids down the line and I felt un attractive as he doesn't show me very much attention unless on his terms. I came back on here and I feel like I should never have left!
the issue I'm having is I could never cheat (I feel like thats what I'd be doing as he has no knowledge of this) I have also reconnected with someone I knew many years ago (he isn't a swinger I don't think) he's having issues with his wife and our conversations are very sexual....
here's my dilemma do I just carry on chatting and flirting etc (which is what my head tells me to do) or do I do more which is what my pussy is constantly telling me to do when chatting with him or reading the stories on here  |
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I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol |
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"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol "
I don't know whether skirting around the subject is the best way maybe a proper full on discussion about the way you are feeling and what you'd like but if he isn't willing to listen but I can understand the way you are feeling  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol "
Just get it out of your system
If you don’t like it then put it down as an experience |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??"
Or look at it as a guilty pleasure ?? |
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"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??"
Then I gues you can't do it and have to forget all about it! Or learn to live with the guilt  |
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"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??
Then I gues you can't do it and have to forget all about it! Or learn to live with the guilt "
wish I could live with it but I know I couldn't ????? |
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"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??
Then I gues you can't do it and have to forget all about it! Or learn to live with the guilt
wish I could live with it but I know I couldn't ?????"
I'd forget about it then and carry on as you are. Enjoy the thoughts, but just don't take it any further |
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"It also comes down to living with the guilt and making sure it really is a one off. Otherwise things become a real mess, real quickly! that's my problem. I couldn't live with the guilt ??
Then I gues you can't do it and have to forget all about it! Or learn to live with the guilt
wish I could live with it but I know I couldn't ?????
I'd forget about it then and carry on as you are. Enjoy the thoughts, but just don't take it any further "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol "
Think the issue in question is that of him only showing you attention on his terms, not whether he wants to swing |
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"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol
Think the issue in question is that of him only showing you attention on his terms, not whether he wants to swing "
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"If you can't live with the guilt then maybe you should stop talking to the other guy? Too much temptation x
that's what I'm starting to think  "
Cold turkey is the only way i reckon. Cut the link = cut the temptation hopefully.
As to talking to your hubby, i might be wrong but i reckon he would be up for it in the right circumstances and right preperation?
Maybe try mff first (if you can) and get him used to the idea.
Or something less intense - take a weekend break away and do some people watching. Go on a date, open up, make it fun. Suggest people you see who you think he would go for. Sow the seed in his head. Make it fun with no pressure. Dont even mention mmf. Just enjoy each other for a weekend and build on from that.
If he is up for mff, he can be persuaded to more. I would be the same i think but i would be more open to the idea if it was away from home and was a nsa thing.
Probably doesnt help you, sorry  |
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By *ilberryMan
over a year ago
Scarborough |
"If you can't live with the guilt then maybe you should stop talking to the other guy? Too much temptation x
that's what I'm starting to think "
Talk to him etc, and just use your finger-a lot less drama  |
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By *ossauMan
over a year ago
Perth |
"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol
Think the issue in question is that of him only showing you attention on his terms, not whether he wants to swing "
This is the crux of the matter - how he treats you. He is a selfish lover in that it is his terms. This is the discussion you have, he needs to see that you have needs/wants/desires too. To say yes to ffm and no to mmf highlights the selfishness.
Ditch the old flame, have that chat and see what you can sort out. Good luck.
Ps. Pics are wonderful, you'll have them queueing up if he doesn't see sense. Joe x |
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"I've skirted around the subject, like the whole oh have you ever had this fantasy etc and when I mentioned a 3sum he didn't mind the sound of fmf but as soon as I mentioned mfm he was like, nope never gonna happen I'd be WAY to jealous. which I know is good normally but kind of sucks for me lol
Think the issue in question is that of him only showing you attention on his terms, not whether he wants to swing
This is the crux of the matter - how he treats you. He is a selfish lover in that it is his terms. This is the discussion you have, he needs to see that you have needs/wants/desires too. To say yes to ffm and no to mmf highlights the selfishness.
Ditch the old flame, have that chat and see what you can sort out. Good luck.
Ps. Pics are wonderful, you'll have them queueing up if he doesn't see sense. Joe x"
thankyou |
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