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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Im a travelling salesman, so I am up and down the country a fair bit, but most of the time i manage to get back to my disabled wife so I can wheel her into the pantry for bed. But on one hellishly bad tempered day of rain, thunder and wind an unluckily timed treefall during the evening drive home from Rochdale caused me to swerve and hit a memorial left by the parents of a dead teenager. It rendered my 1985 Fiat Panda useless. FOr the forst time in three years it meant staying out the night so I picked up my suitcase, spare pants and copy of spunkgash and head out into that stormy night looking for a place to rest my head, and whack a few tommy tanks off. There was no obvious town, no roadside cafe, only a distant light through a small woods, down a muddy old track. This was my only option tpo ask of a motel or caravan site to ride out the weather. After 20mins of walking through muddy deathholes I came to something rather unexpected. Not a little house, or pub, but a rather imposing looking Hotel ... reminiscent of the Bates Motel from Psycho. As I got closer I could make out the red glowing neon sign, against the grey black ness of the old Hotel. It read "Hotel de Bauchery". I climed the stone steps leading upto the doors, and just as I was about to press the buzzer, the big wooden door creaked open and i was greeted by someone. Not an Igor type of chap as one would have thought, but a lady ... a rather impressive looking lady with long slender legs, perfect shaped hips and bulging breasts. She was weaqring a figure hugging dress that looked like felt, and its colour was a deep blood red. Her skin was pale white, and her eyes were quite mesmurising ... her hair black and long, raven black in fact. I was about to ask her if I could rent a room, when she spoke in a ghostly tone "Hello Collin, I suppose you want to get out of them wet clothes and be run a bath". I dont know how she knew my name but the offer was perfect. Do come in and sample our servicing. I think youll find Hotel de Bauchery is exactly what you need, and our guests and staff are always willing to , ... she paused ... quick your room Collin this way. She seemed alarmed byt eh appraoch of a limping man , strange but I followed.
TO BE CONTINUED (with naughty bits) |