A written documentary of my entrance into the world of submissive servitude. This is a true testimonial of my position to date and I will endeavour to keep this updated as things progress.
Having chatted with a variety of different people about fantasy’s, fetishes and much more there seem to one thing that intrigued me. This one thing kept nagging at me and I began to search through videos on various sites and found myself getting more and more turned on by the thought of someone having full control over my “normal life”.
I work in a very stressful and busy industry and currently hold a position of responsibility and as such this can lead to me wanting to have “blow outs” every now and again to provide some much needed stress relief. All the while I sometimes struggle to make decisions outside of work that turn out for the best and as such the idea of someone taking that control away from me seemed to intrigue and entice me even more.
So here I was searching some well known sites looking at various videos of men who had submitted full control to another individual, they were in various predicaments, from being bound, gagged and abused, through to being made to cross dress and serve as a maid or butler to a single, couple or even a group.
Watching these videos turned me on a lot more than I thought they would and so I decided to begin my search to see if this was for me. Little did I know that this journey would be the start of something that I would hand over full control to someone else.
Registering on a well known site for submissive and dominant lifestyles I nervously completed a detailed profile and looked through the various dominant people. After a couple of weeks of being involved in the forums, messaging people and more there was still no response, not even a polite no thank you. In all honesty I was beginning to give up hope of ever taking the next step into this lifestyle until I noticed a local social meet. Slightly nervous and anxious I decided that I would pop in as it was in a public environment.
So the night came and I maintained my courage to go and have a quick drink and see who was there. Entering the pub I noticed there were a few groups of people dotted around the place. I made my way to the bar and ordered myself a drink. I eagerly listened to various conversations while stood at the bar trying to figure out who was who and the reasons they were there. Whilst stood at the bar a well spoken lady, approximately 6’3 and very well dressed approached the bar shadowed by two older men again who were well dressed. One of the men ordered the drinks and the other paid for them. I watched as they made their way over to a group in the corner and made some introductions. The lady sat down while the two men stood either side of her.
After finishing my drink I did not have the courage to go and introduce myself to the group so I made my way out of the pub and home. The thoughts of ever entering this lifestyle seemed to be further away than ever, if I couldn’t pluck up the courage in a public group environment I thought that this was never ever going to happen.
Going back to the grind with work etc I truthfully never gave this a second thought, then about 2 weeks later I decided to have a quick look through my personal email and noticed a number of email notifications regarding the well known site that I had registered with. I logged in and checked my inbox and low and behold there were several messages from a Lady Thalia dating back over two weeks. Opening the first message it read
“Dear Mike,
I believe we were in close proximity tonight but you decided against introducing yourself. If you had taken the opportunity to part of the group maybe you would be a step closer to achieving what your profile desires. I have kept a close eye on all of your forum posts recently and what I have read pleases me. There are many and varied ways to “enter the lifestyle”, and there are many things that need to be discussed and agreed prior to taking your interest any further.
Should you wish to discuss things then please feel free to drop me a message and will help if I can.
Regards
Lady Thalia”
I began to read this over and over again trying to take in the message. Trying to figure out exactly who this was. My mind drifting back to the social and trying to think who it was. I closed the message without replying and opened the next one again from the same person.
“Dear Mike,
I hope that the social environment has not deterred yourself from the lifestyle. I have noticed that things have gone quiet since that night and that you have not logged on since that day. If you do need advice then please feel free to contact myself
Regards
Lady Thalia”
So again I read and re-read the message over and over again. I decided that I would click through to her profile and have a good read through before actually responding to her message. So with a gulp and a slight apprehension I clicked through.
Reading the profile her experience, her likes dislikes etc were getting me aroused. This lady seemed to be offering exactly what I was looking for, the only thing missing was the lack of a face picture on her profile so I was still in the dark as to exactly who she was. I could not be certain from that brief moment in the pub which lady this was sending me these messages. I decided I would reply to her message and politely ask her.
“Dear Lady Thalia,
Thank you so much for your messages and please accept my sincere apologies for not responding sooner, in all honesty I was very nervous that night in the pub as I have never even contemplated attending one of the events before and as such I lacked courage to introduce myself. I feel like I can be brutally honest about my position with yourself and I thank you sincely for your message.
I would appreciate your advice and help on the lifestyle and the choices etc that have to be made as this is something that is beginning to snow ball in my mind with various scenarios etc.
Please forgive this question but can I ask which lady you were at the social?
Regards
Mike”
And with one quick click the message was gone, now should I wait round online and hope for a reply or should I get back to work and carry on with my normal day to day life? Well I didn’t have to wait long and I didn’t even have time to make my decision. A message come back almost instantly.
“Dear Mike,
I had almost given up on you! It has took a good length of time for you to reply, which for future reference is unacceptable, however as I am here to give you some help and advice I will let you off this time. It may be easier in future if we communicate via email rather than on here, that way you may be able to respond quicker.
In this lifestyle time can take a bit of a back seat, the process of knowing and understanding can either be quick if people click or can take a while. The main thing that you/we need to determine is what you are actually looking for, what is pulling you in and intriguing you about this life choice?
I have had experiences where I have rejected potential submissives due to them not understanding the life, not willing to fully commit or in some circumstance lying about themselves, their circumstances, their needs and thinking that this whole thing is about sex. I have never engaged in direct sex with any of my subs, I never intend to either, so if you think this is just about having a quickie at the end of session then you are wrong.
I will tell you a little bit more about my life at the moment.
I am a full time dominatrix with 2 full time submissives both of whom live with me. One of them is a fulltime house maid and covers everything from the cleaning, washing, ironing through to playing chauffer when I wish to go shopping. The other is company director who provides the funds for me to live my life, he live with me full time and is in full time chastity, he is my companion as well as my submissive.
The above is a bit of a brief about me. Now I would like you to send me your direct email address and contact details so that we can discuss in more detail should you wish to explore this lifestyle further.
Regards
Lady Thalia”
This time I didn’t take anytime to re-read the message and my reply was instant.
“Lady Thalia,
Thank you for your kind and informative email, this has opened my eyes further to the lifestyle and in all honesty intrigued myself further. I do not think this lifestyle is about sex, I believe it is all about control, power, trust and servitude. I understand that any of my sexual desires take a back seat in this lifestyle and that my sexual pleasures are not of any concern. I have provided my direct contact details and I wait patiently for your contact.
Regards
Mike”
I sent the message and logged off, the message contained my email, mobile number, KIK ID and my Skype address. Now I knew I was to wait patiently for her contact.
The following day I received a text message from a number I did not recognise which read. “when you can talk call me to discuss the next steps”. I assumed that this was from Lady Thalia, so I locked my office door, sat down at my desk, took a deep breath and called the number.
“Hi Mike. How are you?” came the male voice at the end of the phone. This was not what I was expecting. “I’m great thanks. Who is this?” came my reply. The person on the other end of the phone went on to explain that his name was Peter and that he was Lady Thalia’ House Maid. Now things clicked in place. He mentioned that I was not the only person that his mistress was interested in and that a number of potential submissives put the phone down when it is answered by a man. He went on to explain that this was the first step that she put in place to ensure that her time was not wasted, I was told that one of her currently trained was soon to leave as he had reached his level and that he was moving on, I was not told who it was and therefore I was unaware as to which positioned was to be vacated and a replacement required.
During our brief conversation Peter took some details regarding my experiences, what I enjoyed socially as well as sexually, it was as though I was completing a survey and a telephone interview all at the same time. It seemed like everything was covered from what I expected, what I wanted (which are 2 different things altogether) through to what toys I had, what I had done before on my own and with others. This was a very very detailed interview.
At the end of our conversation I was informed that Lady Thalia would contact myself within the next 24 hours once she has had time to digest the information provided. The conversation with Lady Thalia would go one of 2 ways, she would either say no thank you and dismiss miss as a potential or add me to the possible list.
I waited and waited for the phone to ring and eventually at 5am the phone rang and awoke me from my sleep. Without even looking at the phone I answered it with a groggy “Hello”.
“Well, well, well” came the voice at the end of the phone. “I thought that I was going to have leave a voicemail rejecting you then”
The beautiful soft voice defiantly brought me round quicker than anything ever before. It was Lady Thalia. I sat up straight on the edge of the bed and eagerly listened to her.
“Well Mike, I am definatly impressed with your CV. You seemed to have achieved and practiced a lot on your own and have the potential to make a great addition to my fold.”
“Thank you Maam” came my response, this seemed strange saying this as I was a little unsure on how to address her.
“There are a couple of gaps within your experience that I would like to test, plus there are a couple of things that I would like to see evidence of before we take things further. However what I am willing to do is have you meet one of my current crop for a coffee so they can explain things a little further”
“Yes Mistress, Ok.”
“You will meet Graham on Tuesday lunchtime, he will text you and let you know where and exactly what time, in the meantime you will receive an email from me with a list of things that I wish to see, these will be evidence based information from what you have discussed with Peter”
“Yes Maam”
My replies seemed very lame however my cock was standing rigid to attention at the thought of things moving to the next level.
“Right Mike, I will leave you to get yourself ready for work and alone with your thoughts. Oh and one last thing, from this point on you are not to touch yourself, you are not to have pleasure sexually with anyone including on your own. If you do then you must message me and let me know. This is a test of mind over matter. The things I am going to ask you for may stimulate your mind and your cock but you must not pleasure yourself. Do you understand?”
“Yes Miss, I understand”
“Good now go and be good”
With that last retort the call ended and I was left sat there naked with a now throbbing cock. I was dying to touch it, dying to have a wank but something in the back of my mind stopped me and I headed for the shower to get myself ready for work.
After arriving at the office I logged into my personal email to find a message from Lady Thalia.
“Mike,
I have read through your details and I hope that it was 100% true. In order to prove this I have listed a few things that I wish to see.
Toys – You have stated a large number of toys within your collection. I wish to see a photograph of these all together to prove that they are in your possession
Rope Play – You mention that you have “played solo” before by tying your cock and ball up, I would like to see evidence of this, I wish to see a photograph of your cock and balls tied stamped with todays date.
Cum Play – You state that you are a heavy cummer. Well you are not allowed to cum until I say, this will be tested soon. I wish to reiterate that you are not to have any pleasure at all from this point forward without my permission.
Anal Play – You profess to having had “toys in your ass” previously, I need to see if you are broken in, I understand from your toys list you have butt plugs, I wish to see photographs of the plugs in your arse. Even if you can not take them I need to see evidence of you trying, you may use lube and what ever you desire to try and take these.
I require the proof by the end of the day today, so the clock is ticking. I am an honest woman and can be forgiving at times so if for any reason you can not do this you must have a good excuse or we will cease to communicate from here on.
Lady Thalia.”
Well the clock was well and truly ticking. I hastily packed up, made my excuses and left the office. I headed home to carry out what was requested eager to please and provide the information in plenty of time.
On arriving at home I set everything up. Toys laid out on the floor, ropes neatly wound together ready for use and my anal passage cleaned and lubed ready.
Step 1 – photograph taken of my toy collection, attached directly to an email and sent across with a brief message
Step 2 – taking a length of rope I looped it through itself and pulled the loop tight round my balls, squirming as the rope cinched tight. Carefully twisting the rope I looped it between my balls making them separate, I looped one ball at a time tightly with the rope, all the time a grimace on my face. I had never tied my balls this tight before, but in the eager to please state I was in I was going to ensure that I carried this out exactly as Lady Thalia would like. Bringing the rope up I bound my cock which was throbbing like never before, I wound the rope round my shaft and finished it off with a Know right at the time of my cock leaving just my throbbing purple head visible. Again photograph taken and emailed directly.
Step 3 – Before I even tried these plugs I knew that I had to do everything I could to get them in. Honestly I had only ever taken the little one before and yes I had enjoyed it but the bigger ones in the set scared me slightly. Ok so here goes I bent over head on the floor ass in the air and pushed the little one inside, it slid in easily and I took the pic as you could see the base of the plug covering my hole. Ok here goes the second. I took a deep breath and put the tip at the start of my hole and tried to back myself on to it. This hurt but I was determined that I was at least going to try. Gradually and gently I eased it in little bit by little bit, all the while my breathing deepend and quickened, with precum leaking out of my cock. Suddenly my ass seemed to suck it in and took my breath away. WOW it was actually in I was amazed that I could take it and it actually felt good. Again I took the picture the base of this one was different to the first plug so it was easy to tell they were not the same one. Right ok the third one. Sliding the middle sized plug out hurt a little but my ass felt ready for the next. I lubed up again and offered it to my hole and wow this thing felt huge. I pushed it against my ass and gently pushed, there was not way this was going in. I managed to get it about half way in but the plug widened even further and there was no way this was going in. As I pushed it further my cock throbbed more, precum leaking even more. I had to give up I was desperate for it to go in but there was no way it was going in. I took a picture showing it half way in and then emailed all three across to Lady Thalia.
So with all three of the requests completed I sent a courtesy email to Lady Thalia to ensure she had all the evidence she required.
Immediately I got an email back.
“Mike,
I must applaud you for your quick response, this is good and you are pleasing me at the moment, keep up the good work.
I will be in contact with you before the meeting with Graham on Tuesday.
Lady Thalia”
From that point these was no contact for 4 days until the Monday morning. My phone rang at around 8am.
“Good Morning Mike, how are you?”
“Good thankyou Lady Thalia”
“Well, what can I say, you have done well so far, you have been a good obedient boy. Now the next step. Are you ready for your meeting with Graham tomorrow?”
“Yes Miss, I don’t know exactly where or what time we are meeting but I have made sure that I have the afternoon free”
“Good boy, I have instructed Graham to text you this afternoon with the details. The reason I am calling is to make sure that you are aware of what I need you to give to Graham when you meet.”
“Ok Miss”
“This is the first part of you handing over control. I want you to package all your toys up in a box and gift wrap it for me. The only items you are to keep in your possession are the lube, the rope and the largest butt plug.”
“Errr, yes Miss, Ok”
“you don’t sound happy!! Do you wish to quit now?”
“No Miss, no”
“Ok then, you will do as instructed. You must however have your cock and balls bound tightly when you meet Graham, and he will be checking. This is a long journey into servitude and you are doing well so far, not many people actually make it this far so I am happy with for now.”
With that the phone went dead, I stood up and tied up the bedroom, went to my secret stash of toys and gathered them all together as instructed. I left them on the side as I would need a big enough box to put them all in.
With that I got ready and headed off to work for a somewhat uneventful day. It was mid afternoon when I got the text from Graham that simply read “Wetherspoons on high street 1:30pm” I replied with ok, see you then.
That was it all arranged and everything went quiet, I headed home at the end of the day with my large box and some nice flowery wrapping paper. I carried out Lady Thalia’ request and wrapped the toys up keeping the other items to one side. I placed the box in the boot of my car so that I would not forget it. After that I headed off to bed.
The next morning I was working from home so that I did not have to make any excuses for the afternoon off. At around 11am I headed for the shower, dressed in a smart suit and vound my cock and balls as tight as I had for the photographs.
At around 1pm I headed into town, parked up and headed to Wetherspoons with my box under my arm. I found a table and sat down in the corner it seemed like everyone was staring at me or was I just being paranoid. Time seemed to pass slowly then right on 1:30 the door opened and in walked this well dressed man, a true gentleman it seemed. Well presented, held himself correctly. He quickly caught my eye and walked directly over to me.
“Mike?” he asked.
“Graham?” Came my response seemingly a little awkward.
Graham sat down and proceded to give me an overview of his life and what was involved and the total influence and trust that Lady Thalia has over him.
He discussed in great detail all the finer details of his life. I assumed that Lady Thalia had told him to give me a warts and all commentary of what was to happen.
I was still intrigued and to be honest even more turned on by the lifestyle than before especially as Graham went into the detail that he had not had a voluntary orgasm since his inception into the training by Miss Thalia.
Suddenly and seemingly out of the blue he placed 2 things on table, a mobile phone and a condom. My face must have been a picture.
“Please tell me you have arrived here as instructed by Lady Thalia!” he asked
“Yes I think so”
“So you have got your cock and balls bound then?” he asked
“Err” I uttered looking round in case people had heard the question “Yes I have, they are bloody tight as well, my cock is trying hard to be aroused but it cant they are that tight.”
“Well. That might be a problem. I have been given a task for you to do. I need proof that you cock and balls are bound so you need to go to the toilet and take a picture. Also if you remember in your interview you said you were a heavy cummer.”
“Yes?!?”
“Well, and I don’t care if you cant get your cock hard, I have been asked to get a sample of this heavy cummer! You are to keep your cock and balls bound and slip the condom on. You need to cum into the condom and I would advise that you milk yourself as much as possible, because if you are not a heavy cummer she will deem that you have lied on your application form.”
With that and without any hesitation I made my way to the toilet. Locking the cubicle door behind me, I pulled down my trousers and presented the camera to my purple cock. The binds were that tight that my cock was changing colour. I took the photograph and sat down on the toilet. For a moment I held my head in my hands and just panicked. How the hell was I going to wank my cock with this rope. Oh well there was nothing to do except try.
I opened the packet and stretched the condom over my bound cock and snapped it on. I began to rub the cock and it hurt like hell. All of a sudden the realisation that if I didn’t do this the training was going to stop and this would be end. I wanked like crazy with the pain drawing tears in my eyes I carried out and wanked like it was my last one ever. Then suddenly my cock started to drain it didn’t feel like an orgasm it felt like everything was just emptying out. And boy there was a lot to empty it just seemed like it kept coming out. I took the condom off and tied it up nice and tight. Slipped it in my pocket and headed back to Graham.
I handed the phone and condom over to Graham who immediately wished me luck and headed out the door carrying my box.
Well this was it, I had met someone in public exchanged a few items and I truly felt like my training had begun.
With all the thoughts running through my head I hurried home to try and digest what had just happened.
As soon as I arrived home I had an email waiting for me.
“Mike,
Well done, you have completed the first part of your training. Now we enter the second part. This is where you will build up my trust and earn your first real time session with myself.
From this point forward I will be setting some tasks for you to complete. I have detailed the first three below.
There will be a time limit on this and I will let you know when the time commences.
The time has not started yet but could commence at anytime. The tasks musts be completed in order and to my satisfaction before the next one can commence.
Task 1
Receive a face full of cum from a hung male. Nothing else must be involved. You must kneel down in front of him as he pleasures himself to full completion into your face.
Reward
You will receive 10 credits for this if you leave the cum on your face for a minimum of 2 hours.
Task 2
You must borrow/purchase nice ladies underwear/lingerie. You must find 2 willing participants ideally 1 of each sex. You must watch as they have fun and pleasure each other, you must not touch yourself at any point. Once they have had pleasure you must act like a good lady and clean them both up to their satisfaction. Once they are clean and the area is tidy and you are alone you will be allowed to pleasure yourself. When you are ready to cum you must collect it up in either a condom or packet and place it in your freezer.
Reward
You will receive 25 credits for carrying this out.
Task 3
You must arrange for a minimum of 5 people to be in attendance for this task. You must again borrow/purchase the ladies lingerie as in task 2. You will this time be subject to a shower of cum and piss. You will kneel/lie down in the middle of these people and will receive showers of cum and piss till they are satisfied that you have received enough. There are a variety of levels of rewards for this task.
Rewards
Level 1 - 10 points for carrying it out as per above
Level 2 - 10 additional points for traveling home from the venue without showering or putting on normal clothes
Level 3 - 5 additional points if you suck a cock and make it cum
Level 4 - 5 additional points if you clean up all cocks/pussy involved
Level 6 - 10 additional points if you carry this out with a butt plug in your ass throughout the session.
Remember the target is 250 points in order to progress to the next level. These tasks are the first three on your list, as soon as you complete them (in order) then you will receive a new task. For proof you either need verification on your profile or photographic evidence to email to me.
There are opportunities to earn additional points such as collecting a condom full of cum will give you 5 bonus points.
I trust that you are happy with the above and will continue your training.
Lady Thalia.”
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