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For richer or poorer

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I stretched back on the towel, tipped my hat over my eyes and enjoyed the feeling of the sun on my naked body. I could hear the birds singing and the trees rustling in the gentle breeze.

Today was feeling like a good day. Unusually the man in the mirror this morning didn’t look quite as rough as normal. For a change I had a little self confidence.

‘We don’t allow single guys to join’ the man at who had met me at the huge, prison like gate said. Oh great. I’d bumped down a little track for over a two miles, stirring up dust and nearly wrecking the suspension on my mid life crisis. ‘Oh, Hi Duck! Found us ok then?’ said a woman in her sixties. ‘Barry, I invited him. He’s an old friend!’ Looking at me she continued ‘Come on. I’ll show you round.’

We set off round the grounds.

‘So what’s your name then?’

‘Simon’

‘Hi Simon. I’m Yvonne. Bloody men here. They won’t let younger guys join, but some floozy shows up and they fall over themselves to admit her. My husbands the bloody same. I tell you, that new Anna, they all drool over her. They all think us women will run off with the first bit of cock that turns up.’ She patted my bum. ‘We just want a bit of crumpet to look at.’ She stopped in the middle of the path and turned to me, giving me the first chance to look at her properly.

Yvonne was small in height but carrying a few extra pounds. Her tan was deep, but her skin smooth. Her large breasts hung down, gently parting around her slightly round tummy. Her fully shaved mound sat between her well rounded thighs, showing a few vivid thread veins.

Her hair fought to free itself from under the large, floppy straw hat she wore, a few strands of which fell in front of her bright blue, vivacious eyes. A snub nose sitting above a generous smile. Yvonne was certainly not unattractive. ‘Of course, this is a naturist club, not a sex club, so we have to behave. Anything inappropriate and you’ll be kicked out’ she said sternly. I smiled and nodded. Yvonne had a natural flirt I was about her. ‘Why don’t you nip into my chalet there and strip off?’ I did as I was told, hoping she would follow me in. She did, but merely to fold my clothes.

My mind had been working overtime causing my cock to stiffen. Yvonne looked at it and I blushed. ‘Tut, tut’ and she disappeared.

I turned over on the towel and felt the hot sun on my back.

‘You’ll burn if you don’t put cream on’. It was Yvonne. She’d come away from the group chatting and stood next to me, casting a shadow. I felt a dash of coldness and then felt Yvonne rubbing the cream into my shoulders and over my back, scrupulously avoiding going any further than the small of my back. I sighed with pleasure and shifted slightly to make my stiffening cock more. comfortable. With a sharp slap on my bum, Yvonne said ‘You’ll have to do that yourself!’

‘Spoilsport!’ I muttered.

‘Tut, tut’ and with that she was gone.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I opened my eyes again at the sound of footsteps passing just by me. A small, delicate foot with a small flower tattoo landed about 18 inches from my face and moved off again. I craned my neck round to see the owner. I managed to see up to her disappearing bum which sat above a pair of shapely legs. The bum was nice and plump and moved deliciously. I heard more footsteps and bought my eyes back to the front. These feet were also delicate, but significantly older, showing signs of having been crammed into ill fitting shoes in their youth.

‘Tut, tut’

Yvonne moved round to the side. I heard the squirt of sun cream and felt Yvonne start in the small of my back, miss my bum and them apply the cream to my legs, working from my calves up. As she moved to my thighs, I parted my legs slightly and I felt her hands brush my testicles. I shifted uncomfortably again. The next brush was more deliberate and I parted my legs some more. Yvonne cup my balls and massaged them gently, moving her fingers to the bottom of my shaft. Her other hand rubbed sun cream into my buttocks and then between my cheeks. Her thumb rested against my butt hole and she slowly started to circle her thumb around it, before increasing the pressure allowing her thump to pop into me. I admit I started a little and I heard Yvonne giggle.

‘All done!’ and with that she let go of my balls and withdrew her thumb before wandering back to the group. I wanted to roll onto my back, but knew I really couldn’t!

The sun felt good and I started to doze. The chatter faded into the background as I drifted off, being replaced by conversations and events over the last few weeks. They all got jumbled up with the tattooed foot and Yvonne’s massage.

I came round aware that my cock was rock hard and I was playing with it. I could feel the extra heat of the starting of an ejaculation but becoming aware that it want me playing with it. My cock was well lubed and being milked expertly. Without opening my eyes, I came heavily and felt it spatter up my belly and way onto my chest. Yvonne let go of me before running her hand up to my belly and circling her fingers in my cum, working it into my belly button. She then did similar with my nipples before lowering her head and licking the mess from them.

‘I’ll give you half an hour to recover. Come to my chalet’ before kissing me on the lips. I could taste my own saltiness. I lay back, still covered, and closed my eyes. Where had everyone else gone?

Again I heard footsteps. Expecting it to be Yvonne I opened my eyes. Instead of Yvonne it was a younger lady and I judged her to be the owner of the disappearing bum.

Her hair tumbled over her shoulders, framing a most delicate face with warm, brown eyes. Her full lips smiled, parted, and she said ‘Hi’, looked at my cum covered belly, ‘having a good day?’ I stammered something but she was gone. I sat up, embarrassed, wiping myself clean on the towel.

I entered the chalet to find it empty. I was a little early, so sat on the small chair. Yvonne skipped in, saw me, smiled and came to me for a kiss. She grabbed the back of my head and pulled my lips to hers. Passionately we probed each others mouths and continues to do so as we headed awkwardly towards the bed.

Yvonne wriggled up the bed as I worked my way down her body, quickly finding myself between her legs. She opened herself up and pulled me into her, raising her herself up to meet me. Yvonne smelt musky and sexy as I buried my face into her. She bucked and moaned as my cock grew harder against the bed. With one final buck of her hips, she moaned loudly and came.

I grabbed her legs by the back of her knees and pulled her down the bed. I nosed my cock into her and sank into her fully. Yvonne fucked me back as vigorously as I fucked her. We broke and Yvonne turned over and onto her knees waggling her arse at me. I soon slipped into her again and stood, thrusting whilst pulling her hips towards me. Sweat fell from brow, landing on her arse.

Looking into the mirror over the bed, I saw that same man that looked back this morning. I was a little surprised to see another man looking intently in, through the window. I’d been introduced earlier. It was Yvonne’s husband. He was clearly wanking. What a turn on!

With the sun setting, I made my way out to my car. I heard Yvonne call to me.

‘Simon? See you next week? Here’s my number.’ With that she climbed into the brand new Range Rover alongside her husband. He’d still not spoken a word to me.

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By *romleyM41Man over a year ago

orpington / surrounding

Nice !

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By *ust MikeMan over a year ago

Yaxley

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By *lderWiserNowMan over a year ago

Kettrin

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By *enninemarkMan over a year ago

huddersfield/manchester

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By *iscoman7771000Man over a year ago

birmingham

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By *hor66Man over a year ago

Clacton-on-Sea

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By *cottish guy 555Man over a year ago

London

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By *eeker of pleasureMan over a year ago

manchester

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By *lowryderMan over a year ago

Stafford

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By *j and c 2Couple over a year ago

mullingar

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I bumped down the track, trying to avoid taking my sump off on the huge rocks. I saw why Yvonne had that huge Range Rover now. As I came round a corner, a lady stepped to the side to let me pass. I waved a thank you and she shyly raised hers. I recognised her as the younger lady from last week. I stopped and through the open window offered a lift.

‘No, it’s fine!’

‘It’s still a way to go’

‘I’ll get the car dirty’

‘Jump in!’

We bumped down the lane and as we approached Barry opened the gate with a ghastly squeak.

‘You rang, my Lord’ I said in a mock voice. My passenger giggled.

We passed through and parked under a tree.

‘Thank you’

‘You’re welcome. I’m Simon by the way’

As she climbed out, ‘I’m Anna’

‘Ah! So you’re Anna!’

Anna smiled and we parted.

I walked into the club house and helped myself to a cup of tea. Yvonne’s husband, David, was also behind the counter. I passed him an envelope.

‘There’s my forms and the joining fee’ I said.

‘Thank you’

Yvonne came up behind and slipped her hand up my shorts, feeling my bum.

‘Oh goody! You’ve joined! Now go to my chalet and lose those shorts!’

David looked scoldingly at Yvonne. ‘Has Anna paid up David? No? I thought not. I bet if Simon didn’t pay today, you’d be looking to kick him out.’

I slid out and headed to Yvonne’s chalet. I stripped, folded my clothes and headed for the pool. It was chilly and after a couple of lengths I climbed out and sat on a lounger enjoying the warm sun.

Yvonne and another lady wandered up and took up stations on either side of me.

‘You didn’t ring me?’

‘Sorry, I didn’t think you would want me just ringing up!’

‘I like to chat with my friends!’

‘Sarah called me, didn’t you Sarah?’

Sarah nodded.

‘We’re having afternoon tea Wednesday. Do you think you could make it? It’s round my house.’

‘Erm. I’ll have to ask at work’ I said. ‘But if I can, I’d love too.’

I watched as Anna walked towards the pool. Anna was mid forties, with a shapely figure. She was pear shaped with lovely olive skin. Her body certainly wasn’t flawless but showed the marks of a life lived. She had a large tattoo a tattoo of flowers on her breast and a rose winding up her spine. She walked with grace and poise before diving into the pool.

Yvonne saw me watching her.

‘Keep away from her. She’s trouble, mark my words’

‘What do you mean?’ I ask

‘She’s doesn’t fit in here’

I looked at Yvonne, who looked back at me.

‘You’ll have to make do with fucking me instead!’

I blushed ‘Oh, don’t worry. Sarah knows!’

‘David isn’t keen on me though’ I said.

‘Nope. But what he doesn’t know, won’t hurt him’

I looked at Yvonne. She obviously didn’t know that David had watched us have sex last week and wanked himself off to it!

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By *atesey68Man over a year ago

audley

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By *0 Shades of RedCouple over a year ago

Edinburgh

This is good … keep going

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I knew I could get Wednesday off, but wanted time to think things over. I liked Yvonne and found her attractive. I loved her spirit and sense of fun. I’ll be honest, it was also a big boost that she thought I was at least okay looking.

I’ve been divorced a year or so. It was a bruising experience, and financially I’d not done so well. A decent solicitor would have helped, or at least one that was as good as my ex’s, so having a lady think me attractive was good for my fragile male ego. I wondered what Yvonne wanted. A friend with benefits? An affair? Perhaps to leave David?

And David. What would he do? Was he happy to just watch and wank slyly? Would he tell her? Would he confront me? Christ, what if he crept in whilst Yvonne and I were at it and stabbed me? Or buggered me? I suppose that would be very kinky - I wouldn’t rule it out!

It wasn’t the thought of David rogering me that led to me ringing Yvonne on the Monday and telling her I would be there.

‘Do I need to bring anything?’

‘No. Just that lovely bum of yours’

‘Is it just you and I?’ I enquired teasingly.

‘You’ve got a one track mind. No, some of my friends will be round for afternoon tea!’

That evening I queued at the supermarket, waiting for whoever was at the front to bag up and pay. She was shopping for a bloody army.

‘I’m sorry, that hasn’t gone through’

‘Oh, erm, can we try again?’

‘No, it’s rejected again’

The woman was getting flustered. The queue shifted uneasily and people exchanged glances. The woman peered into her purse. ‘Come on love, for fucks sake.’ said a short man, fat man, whose belly hung lower than the hem of his T-shirt.

The woman looked at the queue, burst into tears, turned and ran out. Fuck. ‘Anna!’ I called, but she had gone.

I pushed my way to the front and presented my card.

‘She ain’t gonna fuck you mate’ called the fat man. I gathered up the bags and hurried out. I couldn’t see Anna. I looked around and tried to see if I could find her, but to no avail. I put the bags in my car, regretting the silly boot size it had. It obviously wasn’t designed for a family sized shop! I looked in one. Apparently I was having a fish finger sandwich for tea tonight.

I drove out, passed the petrol station and onto the roundabout, taking the third exit. A figure was slumped on the bench of the bus stop, head in hands. I pulled up.

‘Hiya Anna. You ok?’

Anna looked puffily up at me.

‘Can I give you a lift home?’

She shook her head.

I opened the door. ‘Come on’

She slid in.

‘Did you want to come to my place and freshen up before I give you a lift home?’

This time she nodded.

She followed me down on to the tow path, nervously looking about. I stepped onto my boat, turning to her. ‘I’m afraid this is where I live. I apologise, but I’m still doing her up.’ I opened the door. ‘Mind your head. The steps are a little steep. Bathrooms through there…. it’s small but functional. Tea or coffee?’

Anna spoke her first words to me ‘Coffee please’

‘Ah. I was afraid you’d say that. I’ve only got tea’

‘Tea will be fine’

I handed her a towel, checking it was clean first and headed to the galley.

Anna went into the bathroom, then came out. ‘Simon? Could I use the shower please? My boiler isn’t working’

‘Yeah. Of course’ I said. ‘Oh bugger. I only have shower gel. I don’t have a need for shampoo!’

The kettle whistled and a few minutes later Anna appeared, wrapped in a towel and another encasing her wet hair. She silently sat and sipped her tea.

Anna looked gorgeous freshly scrubbed. I sat at the table opposite and she shifted uncomfortably, dropping her arms below the table. I’d already noticed the thin, silvery scars all the way up her arms.

‘Come on, I better get you home. Your fish fingers will be defrosting.’ She looked at me quizzically. ‘Your shopping is in the boot of the car’.

Anna erupted ‘ I don’t need your fucking charity. Who the fuck do you think you are?’

‘Whoa! I’m sorry’

‘I don’t need some fucker like you feeling sorry for me. You’re a cunt’ she shouted ‘Who the fuck do you think you are??’ she repeated as she angrily got dressed.

We sat at the traffic lights in awkward silence. I looked at her as she stared fixedly ahead. Groping for something to say, I asked ‘Where’s your accent from?’

‘I don’t have an accent. You do’

‘I’m from London. I don’t have an accent! You do when you’re angry though’

She looked out the side window, but I saw a flicker of a smile.

We pulled up and I got out to help with the bags. ‘I’ll carry them in’ I said.

‘I don’t need your charity Simon’ I passed her the bags. Anna grabbed them and disappeared down an alley.

I got back in the car and sighed. ‘I supposed a fuck is out of the question?’ I said to myself. I jumped as Anna put her head through the open drivers window and said ‘Yes it is’ before kissing me on the cheek. ‘Thank you Simon. You’re a very kind man’

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By *duk70Man over a year ago

langley

nice

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By *lowryderMan over a year ago

Stafford

Wow...

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By *ortheastcoupleukCouple over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

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By *cottish guy 555Man over a year ago

London

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By *ipper truckMan over a year ago

near by

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By *rdiscreet327Man over a year ago

Nottinghamshire

Great work. Loving this.

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By *enninemarkMan over a year ago

huddersfield/manchester

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By *j and c 2Couple over a year ago

mullingar

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By *ricky09Man over a year ago

Gloucester/Cyprus

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By *_new_memberMan over a year ago

Tewkesbury

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

As I drove down the road of ever increasingly large houses, I started to realise why Yvonne was with David. I smiled. I pulled onto a track signed with Smalls Farm. I really need to get a car that can cope with all these bloody tracks.

I followed it for half a mile before finally passing through a final open gate and onto a courtyard in front a large, red brick house. The gardens were ornate and well tended.

The Range Rover was in the corner and a few other cars dotted around, mostly small hatchbacks. I crunched across gravel to the door and knocked on the door.

I heard chatter from the other side and soon Yvonne opened the door. I leant forward and kissed her on the cheek. ‘Nice to see you dressed’ she said

‘You too’ I replied, marvelling at the engineering hoisting her boobs up under the white summer dress.

‘Try to look at my eyes! Come through’

I kicked off my shoes, feeling the plush carpet under my feet, and followed her into the large living room where a three other ladies about Yvonne’s age sat.

‘Maureen, Andi and of course you know Sarah.’

I said my greetings. ‘No David?’

‘No. He’s gone to the club. Probably sat with those other boring men talking about moths and butterflies’ Everyone nodded.

‘Don’t worry, we’re not all going to leap on you as the only man!’

The afternoon proceeded with polite chit chat. Some mildly flirty, some about people I didn’t know and mostly just laughter. I really enjoyed it and felt quite welcome.

‘So it everyone a member of the club?’ I asked

‘I’m not’ said Andi. ‘My husband won’t let me.’

‘Mine can’t stop me’ said Maureen

‘That’s because he’s been dead six years!’ laughed Yvonne.

‘I’m so sorry’ I said

‘I’m not!’ laughed Maureen

‘Me neither’ said Yvonne. ‘He was married to me first and cost me a bloody fortune to get rid of!’

Everyone laughed again. Bloody hell. I looked suspiciously at the tea, wondering how he’d died.

‘So how long have to been married to David?’

‘Twenty two long years.’

I was now curious.

‘So what did he do before retirement?’

‘Bugger all, like he does now. Before you ask, the house is mine.’

Andi interjected. ‘Yvonne and I are business partners. We have a couple of companies. We make labels for medicines. We have to design and make them so as they can survive in all types of environment from your bathroom first aid kit to heat of the Sahara or cold of Siberia and still be legible’

She then looked at me.

‘Yvonne and I share everything.’ I laughed.

‘Whereas Yvonne and I’ started Maureen ‘only share husbands. She can keep David though!’

I was starting to feel sorry for David. I was also starting to regret wearing my pink flamingo underpants.

The bedroom was closer to an old fashioned boudoir. Very feminine, very luxurious and divinely scented. Yvonne stepped out of her dress, revealing bright white, lacy underwear and a serious bit of scaffolding for a bra.

‘Lay on the bed’

I did as I was told as Yvonne folded my clothes. She brought out some soft rope and gently wound them round my wrists, tying them off on the bedstead. I could have wriggled out of them easily, but that wasn’t part of her plan. She then slipped a blindfold over me.

I felt exposed, but I trusted Yvonne. I heard her bra fall to the floor and felt her soft breasts running over my chest. Her fingers caressed my belly whilst her tongue probed my mouth. This was heaven. She moved down my body, swivelling she lowered her pussy onto my mouth. The scent, before stretching forward and taking me softly in her mouth. I moaned in pleasure.

Yvonne sat up and started to grind herself onto my mouth. I became aware of someone else on the bed and then felt whoever it was straddle me, lowering their very wet pussy onto me. They started to move in unison and I could feel my orgasm start to build. Yvonne was grinding faster and I was trying my best to keep up with her. With a huge groan, she let go and I felt her juices fall into my mouth. I too groaned and started to cum heavily, the woman sat on me fully taking everything in.

Yvonne became limp and crawled off me. She turned round, undid the ties and whispered ‘I’m leaving you with these three. Is that ok? Can you stay the night?’ I accented to both.

Andi, who had fucked me, lowered herself onto my mouth and for the first time I tasted myself properly. Sarah set to work on my cum sensitive cock. They obviously expected their pound of flesh from me!!

‘Where’s David?’ I asked.

‘I’ve told him to stay in the chalet tonight. I don’t want him home. He’ll do as he’s told.’

‘You do realise he watched us in the chalet?’

‘Did he? No I didn’t know. What did he do?’

‘Wanked whilst watching!’

Yvonne laughed deeply.

‘Spineless arsehole’ she said with some venom. ‘I hope you have enough energy left for me tonight?’

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By *j and c 2Couple over a year ago

mullingar

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Keep it coming great story

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By *eeker of pleasureMan over a year ago

manchester

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By *ark_sentinelCouple over a year ago

Andover

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By *nexpectedExplorerMan over a year ago

SA3

Very hot

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By *igerman23Man over a year ago

hayes

More please

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By *1sexypairCouple over a year ago

Retford

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By *ton_maleMan over a year ago

Shoreham

Love this

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By *cottish guy 555Man over a year ago

London

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By *ave008tMan over a year ago

WOLVERHAMPTON

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By *ilbert4450Man over a year ago

paisley

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I stir in the early morning light. The bed is soft and comfy. Yvonne is on her side and I nestle into her back, sliding my arm under her neck and pull her as I gently stroke her belly with my other hand. She wiggles her bum into me. I start to get hard and she wiggles some more with a delicious giggle.

I nibble her neck and she moves her head forward and I work up to her ear, tugging and pulling it. Yvonne moans gently and the hand that was stroking her tummy moves lower. She parts her legs slightly and slide my finger into her. I start to circle her clit and Yvonne moans ever louder, now grinding her bum against my cock.

I carry on tugging her ear and nibbling her neck, increasing the speed on her clit.

‘Fuck me? Please…..Please?’

I ignore her and carry on. Yvonne gently starts to slide to a quiet but powerful orgasm, her juices seeping out and covering both our thighs.

I continue to play with her clit and she jerks with sensitivity, ramming her arse into my groin. She orgasms again, this time grabbing my hand to stop me continuing.

I withdraw my arm from under her, push her onto her front and straddle her, my hard cock sitting between her cheeks. I reach to the bedside table for the baby oil and squirt some onto the small of her back. The coldness makes her gasp and I start to manoeuvre the oils around her back with long, deep strokes.

Yvonne sighs and starts to relax, slipping into a doze. I pay particular attention to her neck and spine before moving slowly down. I reach her buttocks and massage them, before moving to her legs, working deeply on her thigh muscles and calves. She giggled as I massaged her feet and then started moving back up. Her ankles, calves and back of the knees. Again I started on her thighs. As I moved up the inside of her thighs, her legs parted exposing her pussy. I gently massaged the outside of her labia, occasionally allowing a finger to pass inside and then move on up to her bum hole.

Yvonne arched her bum up at me. I buried my face into her crack, licking and kissing, alternating between her bum and cunt.

I could feel another orgasm building in Yvonne and quickened my pace, sliding two fingers into her. She came loudly with a little sob before slumping into the soft bed.

I smacked her bum sharply and she yelled! ‘Hey!!! That’s naughty!!!’ Before raising her bum ‘Do it again!’ I obliged.

I turned Yvonne onto her back. She raised her knees and parted her legs. I grabbed her behind the knees and pulled her down the bed. She giggled. ‘What are you doing?!’

‘Trying not to hit my head on the bedstead, Shorty!’

I slid into her and we gently made love, each watching the others face intently.

Yvonne lay with her head on my chest, gently playing with my nipple.

‘I wish I wasn’t so old. I could fall in love with you. I’ve never been in love properly. Two marriages and I’ve never been in love.’

‘You’re not too old.’

‘You wouldn’t want an old bird like me.’

‘I could easily fall for you!’ I said.

‘Oh stop it!’

Yvonne slopped the tea on the kitchen island. ‘See. To many orgasms has made me shaky! That’s your fault!’ We both heard the cough and looked over to the door. David was stood in the doorway. ‘Well at least I don’t need to ask why you didn’t want me home last night.’

‘Oh David. Did you want to watch again?’

I felt awkward and a bit of a cad.

‘I should go’ I said. ‘I need to get to work’

David left the kitchen and headed upstairs.

After he’d left I looked at Yvonne who seemed deep in thought.

‘I hate him for what he’s done to me and what’s he’s put me through. I really do’.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

The towpath was gorgeous. The birds sang in the early evening sunshine and the honeysuckle filled the air with its scent.

I jumped onto the stern and fumbled for my keys. Three steps down and I was into the seating area. I unshouldered my rucksack, and followed it onto the upholstered bench.

I heard someone step onto the stern and a couple of heel clicks before a gentle knock on the side. I jumped up and looked through the open hatch.

Anna stood self consciously at the top. Her summer dress was split at the front and I could see all the way up to her white knickers. She was brandishing a bottle of red wine and a small pot of coffee.

‘Hi! Come in’. She carefully made her way down the steps and proffered the wine to me, before putting the coffee next to the kettle.

‘I wanted to say sorry for the way I behaved the other day. I was horrible. I’m so sorry.’

‘Oh. Don’t be silly! I was insensitive. Would you let me make it up to you?’

‘Make it up to me? I’m apologising to you!’

‘Apology accepted. But you’ve not accepted mine so I suggest we go out for dinner’

‘What? I can’t afford….’

‘Hey, Anna. I’ve got half a can of baked beans, three sprouting spuds and dodgy looking piece of ham. I need to get something to eat and I’d love it if you came with me.’

‘But…..’

‘Come on’

The pub was pleasantly humming with conversation.

‘Are you having pudding Anna?’

‘I’m trying to lose weight!’

‘Oh behave. You’re gorgeous!’

Anna blushed.

‘How about Spotted Dick?’

‘What? What is that? You’ve made that up?’

‘I haven’t. It’s a traditional English pudding. You have it with custard.’

‘What’s it like?’

‘Well, it’s a steamed sponge with raisins in. Or dead flies. I’m not sure which!’

Anna laughed ‘I’ll stick with the diet thanks!’

‘Simon? Thank you. I want to pay you back?’

‘Don’t be silly. Next time I’ve run out of food I’ll come round yours. I love a fish finger sandwich!’

‘As much as I’d love to, you can’t come to mine’

‘Husband wouldn’t like it?’

‘I have a daughter. She’s only 13.’

‘I understand’

‘My husband.’ I’m now watching her closely ‘he, erm, works away’

Hmmm. I’ve heard that one before.

‘Which jail is he in?’ I ask

‘Birmingham. He’s in for GBH. He’s due out in three months.’

Oh great. I so want to be tangled up with a self harming woman, with a daughter and a husband with a liking for battering people.

Anna held my hand. ‘I understand if you want nothing to do with me’

‘Don’t be silly. I’m just going for a wee. Have a think about the Spotted Dick!’

I stood at the urinal and tried to clear my thoughts. I don’t need this shit. I left the toilet and let myself out into the pub garden. I’ll move the boat, forget the club, and just have my fun with Yvonne. I clicked the car unlocked and opened the door.

Arsehole. Simon. Don’t be such a fucking arsehole.

‘ I thought you’d climbed out the window!’ Anna said with a chuckle.

‘I tried, but my arse is too fat and I got stuck!’

That’s the last time I lied to Anna. Well, apart from telling her winkles were mouse willies, but that’s another story.

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By *ove2pleaseseukMan over a year ago

Hastings

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By *lderWiserNowMan over a year ago

Kettrin

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By *ipper truckMan over a year ago