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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Just wondering how everyone’s first club experience was (cj’s etc). As a single female I’ve never felt confident enough to go on my own. Anyone any advice?
I do want to experience this but is it better going as part of a couple? Xx
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The 1st time I went to Cj's (I was a single female then) I went with a couple I knew, the 2nd time I on my own. I was a little nervous going in myself but that quickly settled. I saw a few faces I knew & met lots of new people & ended up having a great night. Keep an eye on forum posts as sometimes there are others in the same position as you & you might be able to meet up prior to going. And beware of all the knights in shining armour rushing to escort you!
R |
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" And beware of all the knights in shining armour rushing to escort you!
R "
Another example of single guy bashing here.
While im not a single guy sometimes i may want to go to a club when MSD is working. A few times ive went with single fems , certainly not because im a knight in shining armour but simply because i also will not go to a club on my own. Your advice was spot on at the start but your extra wee comment was totally uncalled for in my opinion. You are part of a couple as i am so do you have personal experience of going solo to a club and having lots of bad experiences of single guys taking you too clubs on your own . ?
Rant over.
To the Op
As a single Fem you will have no probs enjoying a club if you go alone, if you do recieve an offer from anyone offering to go with you it can work out just as good as long as everyone understands your going as friends only. Also use your usual safety criteria when it comes to accepting an offer. Good luck xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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1st time at cjs was years ago really uncomfortable and really nervous.
Porn on a huge tv and folk just sitting about.fast forward and nothing's really changed.so stopped going to see if it gets any better as for us..it didn't.
Tried a club in Blackpool but found it a bit clique.
So no more clubs for us. |
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"1st time at cjs was years ago really uncomfortable and really nervous.
Porn on a huge tv and folk just sitting about.fast forward and nothing's really changed.so stopped going to see if it gets any better as for us..it didn't.
Tried a club in Blackpool but found it a bit clique.
So no more clubs for us."
You could try during an event like Halloween or newyear party, these are generally way better than normal nights, our favourite place is having a cuppa and blether with others around the kitchen table lol. |
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By *ab femWoman
over a year ago
Ayrshire |
"1st time at cjs was years ago really uncomfortable and really nervous.
Porn on a huge tv and folk just sitting about.fast forward and nothing's really changed.so stopped going to see if it gets any better as for us..it didn't.
Tried a club in Blackpool but found it a bit clique.
So no more clubs for us.
You could try during an event like Halloween or newyear party, these are generally way better than normal nights, our favourite place is having a cuppa and blether with others around the kitchen table lol. "
What kitchen table? |
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"1st time at cjs was years ago really uncomfortable and really nervous.
Porn on a huge tv and folk just sitting about.fast forward and nothing's really changed.so stopped going to see if it gets any better as for us..it didn't.
Tried a club in Blackpool but found it a bit clique.
So no more clubs for us.
You could try during an event like Halloween or newyear party, these are generally way better than normal nights, our favourite place is having a cuppa and blether with others around the kitchen table lol.
What kitchen table? "
Cjs im talking of x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah but I'd rather pay the £50 or whatever and stay overnight in town and go for drinks than stand and have a cup of tea in a kitchen?
Plus new yr and Halloween are family events for us not swingers stuff. |
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By *ab femWoman
over a year ago
Ayrshire |
I wouldn't go as a single female,it was bad enough going with a big group of friends.
Non stop guys pawing at you as you walk past them asking to go upstairs with them to have sex. It's pesters paradise. You think it's bad on here getting fancy a fuck messages, try getting them face to face the whole night.
Although to be fair some women like that sort of thing and you could see they enjoyed it so I guess it's what you are looking for out of it.
|
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I've been to CJs as a single fem.
I don't play anymore but I enjoy the social side of it & always been made to feel welcome.
There's always other single fems/couples that you can meet up beforehand
Problem with single guy's taking you there's maybe an expectation for you to play with them.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah but I'd rather pay the £50 or whatever and stay overnight in town and go for drinks than stand and have a cup of tea in a kitchen?
Plus new yr and Halloween are family events for us not swingers stuff."
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"The 1st time I went to Cj's (I was a single female then) I went with a couple I knew, the 2nd time I on my own. I was a little nervous going in myself but that quickly settled. I saw a few faces I knew & met lots of new people & ended up having a great night. Keep an eye on forum posts as sometimes there are others in the same position as you & you might be able to meet up prior to going. And beware of all the knights in shining armour rushing to escort you!
R "
Thank you for the advice xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I've been to CJs as a single fem.
I don't play anymore but I enjoy the social side of it & always been made to feel welcome.
There's always other single fems/couples that you can meet up beforehand
Problem with single guy's taking you there's maybe an expectation for you to play with them.
"
Ah ok, how do you meet the other single females? Xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"1st time at cjs was years ago really uncomfortable and really nervous.
Porn on a huge tv and folk just sitting about.fast forward and nothing's really changed.so stopped going to see if it gets any better as for us..it didn't.
Tried a club in Blackpool but found it a bit clique.
So no more clubs for us."
Really? I’ve always heard good things about cjs?  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
" And beware of all the knights in shining armour rushing to escort you!
R
Another example of single guy bashing here.
While im not a single guy sometimes i may want to go to a club when MSD is working. A few times ive went with single fems , certainly not because im a knight in shining armour but simply because i also will not go to a club on my own. Your advice was spot on at the start but your extra wee comment was totally uncalled for in my opinion. You are part of a couple as i am so do you have personal experience of going solo to a club and having lots of bad experiences of single guys taking you too clubs on your own . ?
Rant over.
To the Op
As a single Fem you will have no probs enjoying a club if you go alone, if you do recieve an offer from anyone offering to go with you it can work out just as good as long as everyone understands your going as friends only. Also use your usual safety criteria when it comes to accepting an offer. Good luck xx"
Thank you. I just feel uncomfortable walking in on my own as a newbie.  is it more of a club music etc or was the comment about just porn on true? X  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"The 1st time I went to Cj's (I was a single female then) I went with a couple I knew, the 2nd time I on my own. I was a little nervous going in myself but that quickly settled. I saw a few faces I knew & met lots of new people & ended up having a great night. Keep an eye on forum posts as sometimes there are others in the same position as you & you might be able to meet up prior to going. And beware of all the knights in shining armour rushing to escort you!
R "
Thank you |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"1st time at cjs was years ago really uncomfortable and really nervous.
Porn on a huge tv and folk just sitting about.fast forward and nothing's really changed.so stopped going to see if it gets any better as for us..it didn't.
Tried a club in Blackpool but found it a bit clique.
So no more clubs for us."
Oh no! If there was just big screens with porn playing I definitely wouldn’t be walking in on my own. I see loads of females are friends on here, just wondering where you meet? Is it at the socials? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I wouldn't go as a single female,it was bad enough going with a big group of friends.
Non stop guys pawing at you as you walk past them asking to go upstairs with them to have sex. It's pesters paradise. You think it's bad on here getting fancy a fuck messages, try getting them face to face the whole night.
Although to be fair some women like that sort of thing and you could see they enjoyed it so I guess it's what you are looking for out of it.
"
Ah really?? Mmmm...... not my thing |
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By *ltKittyWoman
over a year ago
Glasgow |
I've been to CJs a few times, as part of a couple and as a single fem. I've had mixed experiences, mostly to do with single guys but security sorted those issues.
I prefer meeting up with friends there, or organising to meet some people off fab because it's much more fun and it makes you feel less nervous because you're not alone.
People post up on the forums here if they are going or organising some drinks before so that's something else to look for  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" And beware of all the knights in shining armour rushing to escort you!
R
Another example of single guy bashing here.
While im not a single guy sometimes i may want to go to a club when MSD is working. A few times ive went with single fems , certainly not because im a knight in shining armour but simply because i also will not go to a club on my own. Your advice was spot on at the start but your extra wee comment was totally uncalled for in my opinion. You are part of a couple as i am so do you have personal experience of going solo to a club and having lots of bad experiences of single guys taking you too clubs on your own . ?
Rant over.
To the Op
As a single Fem you will have no probs enjoying a club if you go alone, if you do recieve an offer from anyone offering to go with you it can work out just as good as long as everyone understands your going as friends only. Also use your usual safety criteria when it comes to accepting an offer. Good luck xx"
Not single guy bashing at all! Just giving advice from a very recent single & fairly experienced female perspective.
R |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I've been to CJs a few times, as part of a couple and as a single fem. I've had mixed experiences, mostly to do with single guys but security sorted those issues.
I prefer meeting up with friends there, or organising to meet some people off fab because it's much more fun and it makes you feel less nervous because you're not alone.
People post up on the forums here if they are going or organising some drinks before so that's something else to look for "
Thank you for the advice. I’m a fairly confident person, but it’s walking into the unknown that makes me nervous xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I went to cjs earlier this year on my own... I didn't meet up with anyone before hand.. I did message a couple of people on here who I had chatted with on the forums to say I was going and if they were going to be there would they or could I say hello..
They said yes... I had an enjoyable night... This worked for. Me.. It might not work for everyone, let alone a single female... But it's one option. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I went to cjs earlier this year on my own... I didn't meet up with anyone before hand.. I did message a couple of people on here who I had chatted with on the forums to say I was going and if they were going to be there would they or could I say hello..
They said yes... I had an enjoyable night... This worked for. Me.. It might not work for everyone, let alone a single female... But it's one option. "
Thank you. Was it a theme night? X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I went to cjs earlier this year on my own... I didn't meet up with anyone before hand.. I did message a couple of people on here who I had chatted with on the forums to say I was going and if they were going to be there would they or could I say hello..
They said yes... I had an enjoyable night... This worked for. Me.. It might not work for everyone, let alone a single female... But it's one option.
Thank you. Was it a theme night? X"
No it wasn't.. It was a fun for all. Night. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've been to CJs a few times, as part of a couple and as a single fem. I've had mixed experiences, mostly to do with single guys but security sorted those issues.
I prefer meeting up with friends there, or organising to meet some people off fab because it's much more fun and it makes you feel less nervous because you're not alone.
People post up on the forums here if they are going or organising some drinks before so that's something else to look for
Thank you for the advice. I’m a fairly confident person, but it’s walking into the unknown that makes me nervous xx "
Just let that be part of the buzz then |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Oh and I nearly got a toe in the eyeball when I went to walk into a room for a nosey and someone was in a sex swing  "
FFS!!! A toe in your eye
What is a sex swing?? Think I’d like to try this haha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh and I nearly got a toe in the eyeball when I went to walk into a room for a nosey and someone was in a sex swing
FFS!!! A toe in your eye
What is a sex swing?? Think I’d like to try this haha
It's a swing you have sex on. "
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By *ab femWoman
over a year ago
Ayrshire |
"Oh and I nearly got a toe in the eyeball when I went to walk into a room for a nosey and someone was in a sex swing
FFS!!! A toe in your eye
What is a sex swing?? Think I’d like to try this haha"
 yeah  that's my kind of luck though.
What nakked said, a harness swing for doing it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Oh and I nearly got a toe in the eyeball when I went to walk into a room for a nosey and someone was in a sex swing
FFS!!! A toe in your eye
What is a sex swing?? Think I’d like to try this haha
yeah that's my kind of luck though.
What nakked said, a harness swing for doing it "
Mmmm...., |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'd suggest maybe trying a theme might for you're first time, tends to be when it's busy and a lot of people who are just as new as you are. Having said that, I went to cjs in 2017 and it was a grand time, safe, secure, any troublemakers don't last long.. It was a comfy and fun experience, which not every UK club has unfortunately. Hope you have a good night if you do go x - Kitty |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh and I nearly got a toe in the eyeball when I went to walk into a room for a nosey and someone was in a sex swing
FFS!!! A toe in your eye
What is a sex swing?? Think I’d like to try this haha
yeah that's my kind of luck though.
What nakked said, a harness swing for doing it
Mmmm...., "
Blushing while thinking of me and a sex swing.... I'm now.  |
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We went to CJs for the first time a few weeks ago. It was really good - had a tour when we got there and everyone was friendly.
Lots of social spaces downstairs, other options upstairs.
No idea if oldies CJs is a different place from where we went because the cinema room is upstairs, just one room showing porn, not somewhere we stayed more than to see what was in there (couches) and then moved on. Nothing like that in the other rooms or social areas.
No groping or inappropriateness either. Maybe I'm just a total munter though
V x |
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By *MCFUN5Couple
over a year ago
GLASGOW |
Our first time in cj’s we hated it, persevered though and it’s now our first choice when we want a sexy dress up night out. Never been inappropriately approached or touched and can’t praise the staff enough. Clubs are not for everyone, I understand that but we really enjoy it x good luck |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Our first time in cj’s we hated it, persevered though and it’s now our first choice when we want a sexy dress up night out. Never been inappropriately approached or touched and can’t praise the staff enough. Clubs are not for everyone, I understand that but we really enjoy it x good luck "
Thank you. May brave it soon xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"We went to CJs for the first time a few weeks ago. It was really good - had a tour when we got there and everyone was friendly.
Lots of social spaces downstairs, other options upstairs.
No idea if oldies CJs is a different place from where we went because the cinema room is upstairs, just one room showing porn, not somewhere we stayed more than to see what was in there (couches) and then moved on. Nothing like that in the other rooms or social areas.
No groping or inappropriateness either. Maybe I'm just a total munter though
V x"
Thank you for your views...... and your most definitely not a munter xxx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I'd suggest maybe trying a theme might for you're first time, tends to be when it's busy and a lot of people who are just as new as you are. Having said that, I went to cjs in 2017 and it was a grand time, safe, secure, any troublemakers don't last long.. It was a comfy and fun experience, which not every UK club has unfortunately. Hope you have a good night if you do go x - Kitty "
Thank you Kitty xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We haven’t been to CJs but have spoke to two couples we know who have been. They discouraged us from going as they said single guys were following them around which made them feel uncomfortable. They hadn’t been back.
The fact that someone, in this thread, has said troublemakers are dealt with on the night makes us think that maybe there is a bit of a problem with single guys on these nights.
These are only second hand stories but have no reason to believe the couples we know are lying.
We heard the same thing about single guys at After8 too so maybe it’s an issue with clubs.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I (R) have been both as a single female & now as a couple & never had any hassle. Never been to the after 8 club but I do know that you need to pre book into Cj's & single male numbers are capped. Cj's also holds couples & single female only nights.
R |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We haven’t been to CJs but have spoke to two couples we know who have been. They discouraged us from going as they said single guys were following them around which made them feel uncomfortable. They hadn’t been back.
The fact that someone, in this thread, has said troublemakers are dealt with on the night makes us think that maybe there is a bit of a problem with single guys on these nights.
These are only second hand stories but have no reason to believe the couples we know are lying.
We heard the same thing about single guys at After8 too so maybe it’s an issue with clubs.
"
I perhaps didn't word myself properly. What I meant was the odd one or two trying to enter couple or female only rooms were swiftly turned away by bouncers. Not so much trouble making, as just a bad egg or two. All clubs can do is set up a pre sign up to control numbers and even then, some pushy single men will slip through. Its how the club deals with them that matters I'd say (cjs being one of the few in my experience that nipped it in the bud and diffused it immediately). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just wondering how everyone’s first club experience was (cj’s etc). As a single female I’ve never felt confident enough to go on my own. Anyone any advice?
I do want to experience this but is it better going as part of a couple? Xx
"
I threw myself straight in at the deepend as a single male on an event posted as porbably not for first timers, best choice I made, people were friendly and engaging and validated my choice of not doing things in half measures
Also been as part of a couple and again people were friendly
Can always meet someone socially and often people will post about meeting up before CJs and going along together
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I've been to CJs with a play partner once and as a single female once so I'm still a bit of a newbie but I enjoyed myself both times.
It was a little bit awkward at first but I found people to be kind and welcoming, especially if you tell them that you're new, and once you get chatting, it definitely gets easier!
If you're going alone, grab a drink and treat it like a house party where the only person you know is the host who has buggered off somewhere so you're forced to mingle with all of their guests. 
It is nerve-wracking (I almost bottled it at the door when I went alone) but for me, it was worth biting the bullet and giving it a go! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just wondering how everyone’s first club experience was (cj’s etc). As a single female I’ve never felt confident enough to go on my own. Anyone any advice?
I do want to experience this but is it better going as part of a couple? Xx
"
My first dozen or so times I went on my own then dragged bubbly along with me and still quite often go along myself, always plenty of folk willing to sit and chat and make you feel confortavle or even meet for pre drinks or even in the car park to put you at ease before going in |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I've been to CJs with a play partner once and as a single female once so I'm still a bit of a newbie but I enjoyed myself both times.
It was a little bit awkward at first but I found people to be kind and welcoming, especially if you tell them that you're new, and once you get chatting, it definitely gets easier!
If you're going alone, grab a drink and treat it like a house party where the only person you know is the host who has buggered off somewhere so you're forced to mingle with all of their guests.
It is nerve-wracking (I almost bottled it at the door when I went alone) but for me, it was worth biting the bullet and giving it a go!"
Thanks, think I’m still a bit unsure |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've never been to a club either but fancy going. The problem I have is I'm a comfy joggers and t-shirt girl. What the hell would I wear! "
Lol wear what your comfortable in I guess.. is there a dress code? X  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"1st time at cjs was years ago really uncomfortable and really nervous.
Porn on a huge tv and folk just sitting about.fast forward and nothing's really changed.so stopped going to see if it gets any better as for us..it didn't.
Tried a club in Blackpool but found it a bit clique.
So no more clubs for us."
When did you go ? Only ever been porn on in one room and there’s loads of social rooms to choose from, personally I am no fan of porn and avoid the cinema room it does nothing for me tbh although when I stayed over last I slept there great comfy bed and pitch black room for the night slept like a baby |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
There’s actually quite a lot of us single and not so single fems get along, do things outwith fab including the walking group there’s a mixed and ladies only although the walking has been quiet last few weeks with other commitments, I’ve never felt intimidated going on my own and always happy to meet anyone prior to a club night or a social event, everyone has different opinions they’re like arseholes everyone has one and some are nicer than others. If anyone pesters or makes you feel uncomfortable staff and other party goers are more than happy to warn them off, no means no always and persistent offenders can and have been shown the door and not just single men, plenty men and women singles and couples been shown the door, in fact it’s often the couples cause more drama than anyone and it’s usually someone has had too much to drink and makes a complete count of themselves ! And then moans the place is shit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've never been to a club either but fancy going. The problem I have is I'm a comfy joggers and t-shirt girl. What the hell would I wear! "
I wear pjs joggers whatever there’s no pre requisite to dress up other females go causal too it’s what you feel comfiest in the last time I was there I wasn’t feeling it and just wore comfies as was having a fat night |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've never been to a club either but fancy going. The problem I have is I'm a comfy joggers and t-shirt girl. What the hell would I wear! "
Hey ash just wear a smile come on over and show us.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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First time I went I was alone. It wasn't great . I went back with a friend and still wasn't.
However I also visited one down south alone and it was incredibly liberating |
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"Oh and I nearly got a toe in the eyeball when I went to walk into a room for a nosey and someone was in a sex swing "
ah you should have been wearing you safety goggles but remember where there blame there a claime  |
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