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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Is it ever a constructive emotion within a relationship?
If you are prone to jealousy (no bunny boiling shit mind!) do you think it demonstrates to your partner how much you care?
If your partner is not at all jealous, do you ever interpret it as them caring less than you?
I'm thinking of this in both swinging terms and the "vanilla" world. |
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Jealousy can be a good thing depending on how it's dealt with. Let's you know when you've hit a boundary. The important thing is that it's discussed and agreements made to avoid it in future and to make sure everyone feels secure.
Maybe that's the benefit of swinging relationships - we're more likely to discuss it than ignore or condemn it. The working swinging relationships anyway
V x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it all depends on how it's expressed
Maybe i shoild re phrase
How do you express jealousy
In a good way
In a bad way
Or an indifferent way ?"
A healthy way would be to talk rationally about it
An unhealthy way would be to act irrationally
If I'm indifferent about something, a shrug and a meh |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I used to be quite bad I think but have calmed down a bit with age.
Dunno if I've just became more secure in my own skin or what.
I think it can be healthy in a relationship to a degree. |
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"I think it all depends on how it's expressed
Maybe i shoild re phrase
How do you express jealousy
In a good way
In a bad way
Or an indifferent way ?
A healthy way would be to talk rationally about it
An unhealthy way would be to act irrationally
If I'm indifferent about something, a shrug and a meh"
So hypotheticaly then if im jealous of you being on Fab, its healthy that we should talk about it .? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it all depends on how it's expressed
Maybe i shoild re phrase
How do you express jealousy
In a good way
In a bad way
Or an indifferent way ?
A healthy way would be to talk rationally about it
An unhealthy way would be to act irrationally
If I'm indifferent about something, a shrug and a meh
So hypotheticaly then if im jealous of you being on Fab, its healthy that we should talk about it .?"
That hypothetical situation is nothing to do with jealousy in a relationship though |
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Years ago, I was going to a burlesque event with a lady I knew from fab, we got on well, had met often and were really lookin forward to the night ahead.
From nowhere she said how next weekend she was going to a swinging meet with a guy I never really got on with.
It was’nt jealousy but it was an instant peeved attitude at the timing of being told,the more I dwelt on the “why even tell me”, the more the feel good factor drained away from the event we were going to.
I don’t know, was it a natural reaction or am I in denial that jealousy was playing a part or would others be likewise,, just a bit peeved too ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Years ago, I was going to a burlesque event with a lady I knew from fab, we got on well, had met often and were really lookin forward to the night ahead.
From nowhere she said how next weekend she was going to a swinging meet with a guy I never really got on with.
It was’nt jealousy but it was an instant peeved attitude at the timing of being told,the more I dwelt on the “why even tell me”, the more the feel good factor drained away from the event we were going to.
I don’t know, was it a natural reaction or am I in denial that jealousy was playing a part or would others be likewise,, just a bit peeved too ?"
Did she know you didn't like him?
Regardless of whether you were being jealous or not, I think her behaviour was disrespectful. When you're with someone, enjoy the person and the moment for what it is. Why bring someone else up who has nothing to do with your night out? |
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"Years ago, I was going to a burlesque event with a lady I knew from fab, we got on well, had met often and were really lookin forward to the night ahead.
From nowhere she said how next weekend she was going to a swinging meet with a guy I never really got on with.
It was’nt jealousy but it was an instant peeved attitude at the timing of being told,the more I dwelt on the “why even tell me”, the more the feel good factor drained away from the event we were going to.
I don’t know, was it a natural reaction or am I in denial that jealousy was playing a part or would others be likewise,, just a bit peeved too ?
Did she know you didn't like him?
Regardless of whether you were being jealous or not, I think her behaviour was disrespectful. When you're with someone, enjoy the person and the moment for what it is. Why bring someone else up who has nothing to do with your night out?"
She knew, oh aye, when you have that, “well I think he’s alright “ conversation and it’s no changed yer mind in any way lol, yip that conversation |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Years ago, I was going to a burlesque event with a lady I knew from fab, we got on well, had met often and were really lookin forward to the night ahead.
From nowhere she said how next weekend she was going to a swinging meet with a guy I never really got on with.
It was’nt jealousy but it was an instant peeved attitude at the timing of being told,the more I dwelt on the “why even tell me”, the more the feel good factor drained away from the event we were going to.
I don’t know, was it a natural reaction or am I in denial that jealousy was playing a part or would others be likewise,, just a bit peeved too ?
Did she know you didn't like him?
Regardless of whether you were being jealous or not, I think her behaviour was disrespectful. When you're with someone, enjoy the person and the moment for what it is. Why bring someone else up who has nothing to do with your night out?
She knew, oh aye, when you have that, “well I think he’s alright “ conversation and it’s no changed yer mind in any way lol, yip that conversation "
In that case it was a shite move in my humble opinion. |
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"Years ago, I was going to a burlesque event with a lady I knew from fab, we got on well, had met often and were really lookin forward to the night ahead.
From nowhere she said how next weekend she was going to a swinging meet with a guy I never really got on with.
It was’nt jealousy but it was an instant peeved attitude at the timing of being told,the more I dwelt on the “why even tell me”, the more the feel good factor drained away from the event we were going to.
I don’t know, was it a natural reaction or am I in denial that jealousy was playing a part or would others be likewise,, just a bit peeved too ?
Did she know you didn't like him?
Regardless of whether you were being jealous or not, I think her behaviour was disrespectful. When you're with someone, enjoy the person and the moment for what it is. Why bring someone else up who has nothing to do with your night out?
She knew, oh aye, when you have that, “well I think he’s alright “ conversation and it’s no changed yer mind in any way lol, yip that conversation
In that case it was a shite move in my humble opinion." |
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"Years ago, I was going to a burlesque event with a lady I knew from fab, we got on well, had met often and were really lookin forward to the night ahead.
From nowhere she said how next weekend she was going to a swinging meet with a guy I never really got on with.
It was’nt jealousy but it was an instant peeved attitude at the timing of being told,the more I dwelt on the “why even tell me”, the more the feel good factor drained away from the event we were going to.
I don’t know, was it a natural reaction or am I in denial that jealousy was playing a part or would others be likewise,, just a bit peeved too ?
Did she know you didn't like him?
Regardless of whether you were being jealous or not, I think her behaviour was disrespectful. When you're with someone, enjoy the person and the moment for what it is. Why bring someone else up who has nothing to do with your night out?
She knew, oh aye, when you have that, “well I think he’s alright “ conversation and it’s no changed yer mind in any way lol, yip that conversation
In that case it was a shite move in my humble opinion. "
Sounds like she was looking for a reaction. Agreed on the shite move
V x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I used to be quite bad I think but have calmed down a bit with age.
Dunno if I've just became more secure in my own skin or what.
I think it can be healthy in a relationship to a degree."
Jealousy manifests itself from peoples insecurities. With regards to relationships, if your partner gives you reasons to feel insecure about yourself then jealous behaviour will show itself. Just my opinion, but I dont think that jealousy is healthy to any degree. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I used to be quite bad I think but have calmed down a bit with age.
Dunno if I've just became more secure in my own skin or what.
I think it can be healthy in a relationship to a degree.
Jealousy manifests itself from peoples insecurities. With regards to relationships, if your partner gives you reasons to feel insecure about yourself then jealous behaviour will show itself. Just my opinion, but I dont think that jealousy is healthy to any degree. "
So even a wee twinge of jealousy? Say, for example, you discover a work colleague has been paying your partner lots of attention and paying compliments. This then makes you realise how you'd feel if their head was ever turned. Maybe you've been taking them for granted. So you buck your ideas up a bit and make more of an effort in your relationship. Ultimately you both benefit from that. Your partner feels valued and you feel reassured......in an ideal world anyway.
I think people can feel insecure for a whole host of reasons though, many of which can be outwith their partner's control. |
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Jealousy is destructive
Everyone does what they want to do
We can’t control other people’s feelings and actions (can try but can’t fight free will)
Enjoy life for yourself and be pleased that others are too |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I got rid off a buddy cause her jealousy she pulled me off a lass I was playing with at a party"
Stupid woman.
Brick to the back of the napper and then you'd have been none the wiser! |
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By *rMrsWTFCouple
over a year ago
Arbroath |
"I don't think I'm jealous but I am territorial like a lioness
That's what I used to think.....apparently it is just jealousy "
Nah its different I swear and if it's not well then I'm jealous sometimes but I think sometimes it's a good thing |
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Low self esteem, with that you need to self assess what brought about the low self esteem.
By that I mean it’s often a contributing factor to jealous type reactions.
Before anyone decides, “they are just being jealous”, take a second to consider the esteem thing, so often the root cause. |
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