FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > Scotland the review
Scotland the review
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ok so where to begin
Drove thrue some awesome rally style country lanes near lanark as lovely quaint little stand alone houses at roadside and a couple nice villages as i came to the place where i was staying altho saying that you guys need to learn how to use a steam roller and a spirit lever cos damn you cannot make roads flat for shit
The real life people were generally nice pleasant normal apart from one or too total loony
There's a real population crisis looming tho as the amount of women around towns were ridiculously out numbered by males
Some of the fab girls up here have been lovely shame u all work nights and evenings
But in all my best description of the people would be a small percentage of diamonds in a sea of coal Santa must have a hell of a grudge against
Food mixed i had a lovely maccies nice service speedy bonus chips
Fry up herby sausage is an issue why mess with the flavour of meat
Dont get me started on sunday roasts wrong just wrong small aunt bessie yorkshire puds shitty gravy
Weather
Not as bad as rumours suggest sltho it was snowing a but but i put that down to the fridged folks
Gratitude most were polote but loose marks for looking a girt
Horse in the mouth and missing out in the best fab has to offer
So il say out if 10
5/10 totally average
Will i return highly unlikely
Thanks u were uneventfull
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Well your experience isnt mine.
Been to a fair few places in scotland, As a driver collecting and delivering up there.
Most of the places I have been too have some loverly ladies.
Polite and know how to have fun and tease people.
Been woken up many a time, Early morning with a loverly breakfast and a hot mug of coffee.
Highest ive been is fraserburgh and inverness, Theres some gorgeous places up there.
Some loverly drop off cliff edges and some of those seaside little towns.
Loverly little places you wouldnt even know they was there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Our roads are made to work around our beautiful scenery. The fact we don't have endless motorways means people have to pay attention and our roads are a lot safer with fewer collisions than the rest of the UK.
It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.
We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.
I'm assuming those ladies working are among the diamonds? The ones you actually spoke to, you're judging the others based on what? Not wanting to engage with someone who is just here for a night or two?
I don't think you can judge Scottish food until you eat some. Maccie D's is the same all over and from the sounds of your dinner (an English meal) you didn't stray from your hotel nor research better places to go.
Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.
Plus snow is pretty.
What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.
Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.
We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place  |
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"Our roads are made to work around our beautiful scenery. The fact we don't have endless motorways means people have to pay attention and our roads are a lot safer with fewer collisions than the rest of the UK.
It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.
We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.
I'm assuming those ladies working are among the diamonds? The ones you actually spoke to, you're judging the others based on what? Not wanting to engage with someone who is just here for a night or two?
I don't think you can judge Scottish food until you eat some. Maccie D's is the same all over and from the sounds of your dinner (an English meal) you didn't stray from your hotel nor research better places to go.
Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.
Plus snow is pretty.
What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.
Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.
We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place "
Let us reciprocate with a review of your threads while we let you stay in our country.
Thread one - boring
Thread two - desperate
Thread three- seriously desperate
Thread four- holy crap batman this guy is desperate for a shag
Thread five- is he still here
Thread six - trip adviser boring
Thread seven will hopefully be called " i closed the door on the way out "
Im only joking mucker your welcome back to Scotland anytime.
If nothing else it makes the rest of us guys more appealing when the see the best Engerlund has to offer.   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ok so where to begin
Drove thrue some awesome rally style country lanes near lanark as lovely quaint little stand alone houses at roadside and a couple nice villages as i came to the place where i was staying altho saying that you guys need to learn how to use a steam roller and a spirit lever cos damn you cannot make roads flat for shit
The real life people were generally nice pleasant normal apart from one or too total loony
There's a real population crisis looming tho as the amount of women around towns were ridiculously out numbered by males
Some of the fab girls up here have been lovely shame u all work nights and evenings
But in all my best description of the people would be a small percentage of diamonds in a sea of coal Santa must have a hell of a grudge against
Food mixed i had a lovely maccies nice service speedy bonus chips
Fry up herby sausage is an issue why mess with the flavour of meat
Dont get me started on sunday roasts wrong just wrong small aunt bessie yorkshire puds shitty gravy
Weather
Not as bad as rumours suggest sltho it was snowing a but but i put that down to the fridged folks
Gratitude most were polote but loose marks for looking a girt
Horse in the mouth and missing out in the best fab has to offer
So il say out if 10
5/10 totally average
Will i return highly unlikely
Thanks u were uneventfull
"
I'm amazed you wrote this, the fact you believe it and I don't know how you did through whatever you took.
What strikes me is that you're using food to back up your statements that has no relevance to Scottish culture. American junk and central European (mostly french) derived cuisines as gauge points. LOL  |
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By *uvmatureMan
over a year ago
Richmond and Scotland |
"Our roads are made to work around our beautiful scenery. The fact we don't have endless motorways means people have to pay attention and our roads are a lot safer with fewer collisions than the rest of the UK.
It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.
We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.
I'm assuming those ladies working are among the diamonds? The ones you actually spoke to, you're judging the others based on what? Not wanting to engage with someone who is just here for a night or two?
I don't think you can judge Scottish food until you eat some. Maccie D's is the same all over and from the sounds of your dinner (an English meal) you didn't stray from your hotel nor research better places to go.
Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.
Plus snow is pretty.
What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.
Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.
We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place "
Well said! this guy is a moron.His pathetic attempt at a 'review' is almost unreadable due to his poor spelling and grammar. It would be interesting to know where he lives in Yorkshire because I can tell you there are some shitholes down there! |
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"Our roads are made to work around our beautiful scenery. The fact we don't have endless motorways means people have to pay attention and our roads are a lot safer with fewer collisions than the rest of the UK.
It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.
We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.
I'm assuming those ladies working are among the diamonds? The ones you actually spoke to, you're judging the others based on what? Not wanting to engage with someone who is just here for a night or two?
I don't think you can judge Scottish food until you eat some. Maccie D's is the same all over and from the sounds of your dinner (an English meal) you didn't stray from your hotel nor research better places to go.
Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.
Plus snow is pretty.
What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.
Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.
We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place
Well said! this guy is a moron.His pathetic attempt at a 'review' is almost unreadable due to his poor spelling and grammar. It would be interesting to know where he lives in Yorkshire because I can tell you there are some shitholes down there!"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You are aware he is having a laugh.. tongue and cheek style.. he is known for his sarky humour!!
And any way, cant believe i will say this..
"NEXT".....
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Our roads are made to work around our beautiful scenery. The fact we don't have endless motorways means people have to pay attention and our roads are a lot safer with fewer collisions than the rest of the UK.
It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.
We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.
I'm assuming those ladies working are among the diamonds? The ones you actually spoke to, you're judging the others based on what? Not wanting to engage with someone who is just here for a night or two?
I don't think you can judge Scottish food until you eat some. Maccie D's is the same all over and from the sounds of your dinner (an English meal) you didn't stray from your hotel nor research better places to go.
Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.
Plus snow is pretty.
What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.
Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.
We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On behalf of England I can only apologise for the Op, I will be visiting Scotland in May, hopefully get to take in all that your great country has to offer.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"On behalf of England I can only apologise for the Op, I will be visiting Scotland in May, hopefully get to take in all that your great country has to offer. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I lived and worked in the Scottish Borders for a year in my youth and loved it, beautiful countryside, lovely friendly people, excellent food, loads to do..even on a Tuesday!!
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Last time I visited Scotland was in 2008 to Dumfries. It was freezing in August and raining. The food was very odd to say the least.
However I’m sure there are some beautiful places to visit there. Edinburgh is on my to do list at some point.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On behalf of England I can only apologise for the Op, I will be visiting Scotland in May, hopefully get to take in all that your great country has to offer. "
You will be very welcome.
There will be scores of folks more than happy to show you around and unearth to you our little Tuesday night secrets.
Just ask
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Last time I visited Scotland was in 2008 to Dumfries. It was freezing in August and raining. The food was very odd to say the least.
However I’m sure there are some beautiful places to visit there. Edinburgh is on my to do list at some point.
"
bloody kiss up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think "
Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think
Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast? "
nooo lol even ignored the fking herb sausage who runs pork like that lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think
Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast? nooo lol even ignored the fking herb sausage who runs pork like that lol"
I can't believe you didn't go get a battered pizza. I'm really disappointed in you! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think
Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast? nooo lol even ignored the fking herb sausage who runs pork like that lol
I can't believe you didn't go get a battered pizza. I'm really disappointed in you! "
no idea where to find them i did ask for a tour guide days ago |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The amount of threads you've made,
Do you realise that youve just sewn another 10 pair of scottish women's knickers that they won't drop ? "
Im not worried im still getting offers for next time but il have to disappoint as il not be back up
Wont be a next time im sure il be ok tho the mental scars will heal at the border or at least the next watering hole |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Herb sausage... musta been a Toby carvery type place you were at. Better grub out a chuck wagon tbf."
well nobody told me that again a tour guide add was placed
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"The amount of threads you've made,
Do you realise that youve just sewn another 10 pair of scottish women's knickers that they won't drop ?
Im not worried im still getting offers for next time but il have to disappoint as il not be back up
Wont be a next time im sure il be ok tho the mental scars will heal at the border or at least the next watering hole "
Oh a game of playing dangling the Cumberland sausage now  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The amount of threads you've made,
Do you realise that youve just sewn another 10 pair of scottish women's knickers that they won't drop ?
Im not worried im still getting offers for next time but il have to disappoint as il not be back up
Wont be a next time im sure il be ok tho the mental scars will heal at the border or at least the next watering hole
Oh a game of playing dangling the Cumberland sausage now "
dunno what thats means |
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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago
Livingston |
"On behalf of England I can only apologise for the Op, I will be visiting Scotland in May, hopefully get to take in all that your great country has to offer. "
Now you have given plenty notice, I'm sure that arrangements can be made...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"On behalf of England I can only apologise for the Op, I will be visiting Scotland in May, hopefully get to take in all that your great country has to offer.
Now you have given plenty notice, I'm sure that arrangements can be made...
"
 |
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"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think
Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast? "
He didnt even try
Haggis, neeps & tatties
chicken haggis and bacon roll |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I thought that a fair score for being half asleep and i really cant believe how much u all seem to care what i think
Did you at least get tattie scones and haggis with your breakfast?
He didnt even try
Haggis, neeps & tatties
chicken haggis and bacon roll "
i was just sick in my mouth does that qualify |
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"Our roads are made to work around our beautiful scenery. The fact we don't have endless motorways means people have to pay attention and our roads are a lot safer with fewer collisions than the rest of the UK.
It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.
We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.
I'm assuming those ladies working are among the diamonds? The ones you actually spoke to, you're judging the others based on what? Not wanting to engage with someone who is just here for a night or two?
I don't think you can judge Scottish food until you eat some. Maccie D's is the same all over and from the sounds of your dinner (an English meal) you didn't stray from your hotel nor research better places to go.
Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.
Plus snow is pretty.
What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.
Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.
We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place "
Spot on Rubi, you forgot to mention that when god was creating Scotland giving us these majestic mountains, rolling hills, beautiful lochs and of course wonderful people. One of gods angels questioned him asking if he was not being to generous.
God replied, not really, wait till you see the neighbours im giving them. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.
Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds? "
holbeck |
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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago
Livingston |
"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.
Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds? holbeck"
Pontefract  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.
Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds? holbeck
Pontefract "
thats not leeds |
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Ive just spent 11 weeks before xmas in aberdeen, first day I familiarized myself with the area.
As I was working there.
Its how I know some of the cuisine in scotland.
Had some loverly meals as well.
I was about 5 mins away from the town centre .
Im due to return back to the area and work elsewhere in a loverly cottage with loverly sea views. |
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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago
Livingston |
"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.
Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds? holbeck
Pontefract thats not leeds"
I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.
Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds? holbeck
Pontefract thats not leeds
I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... "
it wasnt that good ffs |
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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago
Livingston |
"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.
Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds? holbeck
Pontefract thats not leeds
I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... it wasnt that good ffs "
Haha, should really have said Rotherham, but that's where my family are from... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.
Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds? holbeck
Pontefract thats not leeds
I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... it wasnt that good ffs
Haha, should really have said Rotherham, but that's where my family are from... "
well armadale is twinned with armley apparently |
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"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.
Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds? holbeck
Pontefract thats not leeds
I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... it wasnt that good ffs
Haha, should really have said Rotherham, but that's where my family are from... well armadale is twinned with armley apparently "
Lincoln Green! The dogs go round in 2s! It’s a scary dark place........ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Our roads are made to work around our beautiful scenery. The fact we don't have endless motorways means people have to pay attention and our roads are a lot safer with fewer collisions than the rest of the UK.
It's a Tuesday in January. I doubt any town has a bustling nightlife full of wanton women.
We do work evenings and nights because we are a hard working nation, we don't let petty things like sleep get in our way.
I'm assuming those ladies working are among the diamonds? The ones you actually spoke to, you're judging the others based on what? Not wanting to engage with someone who is just here for a night or two?
I don't think you can judge Scottish food until you eat some. Maccie D's is the same all over and from the sounds of your dinner (an English meal) you didn't stray from your hotel nor research better places to go.
Scotland and Yorkshire have roughly the same average rainfall.
Plus snow is pretty.
What's a girt horse? Must be one of those weird English things like Morris dancing or cricket.
Ultimately though your rating isn't a concern, we know we're fucking great.
We also know our accents work wonders and a Scotsman in Yorkshire would be too busy shagging to be rating the place
Spot on Rubi, you forgot to mention that when god was creating Scotland giving us these majestic mountains, rolling hills, beautiful lochs and of course wonderful people. One of gods angels questioned him asking if he was not being to generous.
God replied, not really, wait till you see the neighbours im giving them. "
Pfffft 
Sorry to hear your trip was not as good as you would have liked OP. Scotland is and will always be amazing though. I can't wait to go again! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Quite funny, you went to a wee corner of Scotland and it’s your overall impression of all of Scotland,lol.
Trying to think what is the equivalent for England? Leeds? holbeck
Pontefract thats not leeds
I know that, was just trying to think of somewhere as bad as Bathgate lol... it wasnt that good ffs
Haha, should really have said Rotherham, but that's where my family are from... well armadale is twinned with armley apparently
Lincoln Green! The dogs go round in 2s! It’s a scary dark place........"
wasnt as bad as that |
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