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Xmas card to the Ex
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Spilt up with my ex 4 months ago. Left on good terms. Talking to my friend yesterday and she said send him a Xmas card. You were both good together. I think it sends the wrong message and verging on innapropriate. In work yesterday and 3 colleagues said it would be a nice gesture. For me a text at the most saying merry Xmas. Have a good one is more than enough. So
Xmas card
Text or
Nothing |
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I always do and always will. I even buy him an xmas present and birthday gift and he does same to me. We were together a long time and he is the father of my children. We get on ok now and although i left there will always be a bond. |
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"You are having a laugh 
No. I dont hold grudges and for the sake of the children we remain civil. I dont buy a big gift just a little parcel."
Massive difference between being civil and exchanging little parcels.
Guess each to their own lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Iv heard of a cpl that after being split over 15yrs and being with other people they still share custody of the dog every week lol
Think if I met a guy and he did that I'd question whether there were still feelings for the other person? Yeah you love the dog but come on...15yrs every week? |
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"Having kids with someone is different tho?
Just a bf/he thing I wouldn't .
I’ve got kids and am civil I’d never exchange little parcels. You move on.
Lol, believe you me i have moved on."
Hehe I’m in the same boat as you I think we are civil just would freak me out idea of exchanging parcels lol |
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"Iv heard of a cpl that after being split over 15yrs and being with other people they still share custody of the dog every week lol
Think if I met a guy and he did that I'd question whether there were still feelings for the other person? Yeah you love the dog but come on...15yrs every week? "
That made me laugh please
Couldn’t agree more re questioning still having feelings. I’d be exactly the same.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always do and always will. I even buy him an xmas present and birthday gift and he does same to me. We were together a long time and he is the father of my children. We get on ok now and although i left there will always be a bond."
I get my ex husband presents but the kids give those. I don't give him anything. We are also civil. Would you Do the same if you didn't have children together |
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By *eep.Man
over a year ago
Just a background character |
"Iv heard of a cpl that after being split over 15yrs and being with other people they still share custody of the dog every week lol
Think if I met a guy and he did that I'd question whether there were still feelings for the other person? Yeah you love the dog but come on...15yrs every week? "
How old is the dog? Must me some age |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Iv heard of a cpl that after being split over 15yrs and being with other people they still share custody of the dog every week lol
Think if I met a guy and he did that I'd question whether there were still feelings for the other person? Yeah you love the dog but come on...15yrs every week?
How old is the dog? Must me some age "
Won't be doing it much longer I'd imagine |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mine will get a wee present of our kids (which I buy) but that's it. We arnt friends anymore so the spirit if Christmas doesn't extend that far, harsh, but I'd rather exert my energy on those who I care about x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nothing. I was with my boyfriend for 12 years before I left him and I made the mistake of giving him a small present and a card last year. Even though we were still on good terms, I shouldn't have done it as he thought there was hope that we'd get back together.
I think if you have kids with someone a card is acceptable but not a present. It just confuses things  x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In my experience definentley NOTHING
gives out wring message
Plus if you have a new partner not fair on them .
Its not being nasty it's EX now so keep it that way .
To be honest you shoukd remove the number out your phone too ..
Clean break as they say |
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It's a conundrum only the 2 folks involved would in all honesty know the answer as to do you buy each other little gifts and a card ,Been split from daughters mum 19 years and we do send each other a card on birthdays and xmas and isn't sending wrong message out to either of us ,We still better friends than we ever would be partners |
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My mum and dad split years ago and after a long period of bitterness and fighting we can now all do xmas day together. They buy each other gifts and they keep in touch regularly through text. They were together a long time and had two kids together so I feel it’s lovely they can still have a friendship.
However, unless it was a substantially lengthy relationship and there are kids involved I would say leave it. If he texts then return a polite Xmas message.
If you have a new man I would definitely say don’t do it.
I’m with my man now for a few years and I have exes I was with for longer than this and I wouldn’t dream of contacting them
Mrs |
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I have children but they lost their mum when young, so I don't have the option. Though any girlfriends i have had before or after their mum i have never felt the urge to send cards or texts. Though if one was to contact me i would be polite and return my best wishes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Iv heard of a cpl that after being split over 15yrs and being with other people they still share custody of the dog every week lol
Think if I met a guy and he did that I'd question whether there were still feelings for the other person? Yeah you love the dog but come on...15yrs every week? "
That's a hell of a lot of doggy years!! |
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"Spilt up with my ex 4 months ago. Left on good terms. Talking to my friend yesterday and she said send him a Xmas card. You were both good together. I think it sends the wrong message and verging on innapropriate. In work yesterday and 3 colleagues said it would be a nice gesture. For me a text at the most saying merry Xmas. Have a good one is more than enough. So
Xmas card
Text or
Nothing "
if you parted on good terms then yes I would |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I agree mother of my children the most important things to come from out relationship. Nice card and present for ex wife and the same for ex mother-in-law. It's called Integrity doing the right thing no matter the circumstances |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I agree mother of my children the most important things to come from out relationship. Nice card and present for ex wife and the same for ex mother-in-law. It's called Integrity doing the right thing no matter the circumstances"
Agreed. And rising above your own differences for the sake of your kids. |
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"I agree mother of my children the most important things to come from out relationship. Nice card and present for ex wife and the same for ex mother-in-law. It's called Integrity doing the right thing no matter the circumstances"
That’s lovely how sweet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nah move on unless your asking because you want someone to say yes as you still have feelings otherwise move on and give the card to someone you really want to .. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was married & with my ex wife for 25 years total. There were great times along with bad. Would i give her a card or present? No. She can buy her own with all the money she made from my pensions & forced sale of the house. Im over her. An ex is an ex for a reason. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My mum and dad split years ago and after a long period of bitterness and fighting we can now all do xmas day together. They buy each other gifts and they keep in touch regularly through text. They were together a long time and had two kids together so I feel it’s lovely they can still have a friendship.
However, unless it was a substantially lengthy relationship and there are kids involved I would say leave it. If he texts then return a polite Xmas message.
If you have a new man I would definitely say don’t do it.
I’m with my man now for a few years and I have exes I was with for longer than this and I wouldn’t dream of contacting them
Mrs"
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"I was married & with my ex wife for 25 years total. There were great times along with bad. Would i give her a card or present? No. She can buy her own with all the money she made from my pensions & forced sale of the house. Im over her. An ex is an ex for a reason."
Exactly this. Can’t believe all the sending cards and presents rubbish. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was married & with my ex wife for 25 years total. There were great times along with bad. Would i give her a card or present? No. She can buy her own with all the money she made from my pensions & forced sale of the house. Im over her. An ex is an ex for a reason."
But you're not bitter  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was married & with my ex wife for 25 years total. There were great times along with bad. Would i give her a card or present? No. She can buy her own with all the money she made from my pensions & forced sale of the house. Im over her. An ex is an ex for a reason.
But you're not bitter "
Absolutly not. I suppose its different if theres young kids involved but even then why would you. Being civil is what the kids need.
How many people give an ex partner a card/ present when there in a new relationship? Its weird |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"just dont
I'm not. I have no intention to. Just wanted to see what everyone else thought
See whose not over it
Still burns a candle  "
I'm well over it |
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