FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > Polygamous relationships
Polygamous relationships
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I know this is a swingers site but this too good of a topic to pass up 
Had a great conversation with an ex partner about this subject just interested to hear other people's input |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know this is a swingers site but this too good of a topic to pass up
Had a great conversation with an ex partner about this subject just interested to hear other people's input "
Got no interest in this what so ever, just an addition to a married /BF/GF relationship of convenience so that it works in. It's obviously more in depth than that but wouldn't want to delve further into it on here.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For some people I imagine it could work quite well as there are lots of swingers that prefer the same regular partners to play with, more often than not these types of relationships appear from the outside to be a compromise of one person to keep the individual they love but allow them to enjoy a bisexual relationship with another person, my friends older brother has moved to America and he lives in a house with around thirty other people and they all sleep with each other but him and his wife are the masters/caretakers of the house, when my pal went out for a visit she said everyone was lovely and it all seemed too perfect but she couldn’t help but feel like it was a bit like a cult and said everyone seemed too happy and chilled to be normal lol said it felt like everyone including her brother was brainwashed into this idea that they were all happy and putting on a face for the sake of each other.personally I don’t identify as a swinger because when I’m single I enjoy seeing a few guys at a time and getting something from each of them at that time but when I’m in a relationship I’m monogamous but I do love my fab friends and the socialising and the fact that I don’t have to hide my past and that I’m totally honest with who I am and what makes me tick fortunately for me my latest bf understands and has friends who are swingers and is happy to join in the social side of fab with me xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"....my friends older brother has moved to America and he lives in a house with around thirty other people and they all sleep with each other but him and his wife are the masters/caretakers of the house, when my pal went out for a visit she said everyone was lovely and it all seemed too perfect but she couldn’t help but feel like it was a bit like a cult and said everyone seemed too happy and chilled to be normal lol said it felt like everyone including her brother was brainwashed into this idea that they were all happy and putting on a face for the sake of each other..."
Do they discuss 'the rapture' a lot...?
I thought I was in a poly relationship a wee while back with a girl I met on here. Turns out she just wanted to have lots of boyfriends. |
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By *dlilbumCouple
over a year ago
Aviemore and regularly visit Glasgow |
" I thought I was in a poly relationship a wee while back with a girl I met on here. Turns out she just wanted to have lots of boyfriends."
You do realise that what you just described is a poly relationship right?
The fact that she wanted and had more than one boyfriend, is literally the definition of polyamory.
D |
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By *tew008Man
over a year ago
edinburgh |
" I thought I was in a poly relationship a wee while back with a girl I met on here. Turns out she just wanted to have lots of boyfriends.
You do realise that what you just described is a poly relationship right?
The fact that she wanted and had more than one boyfriend, is literally the definition of polyamory.
D "
They need to be aware of each other though. Otherwise all the cheaters can say
It’s just a polygamous relationship.  |
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By *dlilbumCouple
over a year ago
Aviemore and regularly visit Glasgow |
" I thought I was in a poly relationship a wee while back with a girl I met on here. Turns out she just wanted to have lots of boyfriends.
You do realise that what you just described is a poly relationship right?
The fact that she wanted and had more than one boyfriend, is literally the definition of polyamory.
D
They need to be aware of each other though. Otherwise all the cheaters can say
It’s just a polygamous relationship. "
The word is polyamorous, polygamy is an entirely different thing.
You are correct that a poly relationship is one that comes from an agreement, it’s not just a licence to shag around.
That’s called an open relationship.
D |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I thought I was in a poly relationship a wee while back with a girl I met on here. Turns out she just wanted to have lots of boyfriends.
You do realise that what you just described is a poly relationship right?
The fact that she wanted and had more than one boyfriend, is literally the definition of polyamory.
D "
Well I'll be darned...!  |
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By *tew008Man
over a year ago
edinburgh |
" I thought I was in a poly relationship a wee while back with a girl I met on here. Turns out she just wanted to have lots of boyfriends.
You do realise that what you just described is a poly relationship right?
The fact that she wanted and had more than one boyfriend, is literally the definition of polyamory.
D
They need to be aware of each other though. Otherwise all the cheaters can say
It’s just a polygamous relationship.
The word is polyamorous, polygamy is an entirely different thing.
You are correct that a poly relationship is one that comes from an agreement, it’s not just a licence to shag around.
That’s called an open relationship.
D "
Yea I blame auto correct. Thing thinks I love talking about ducks. |
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"For some people I imagine it could work quite well as there are lots of swingers that prefer the same regular partners to play with, more often than not these types of relationships appear from the outside to be a compromise of one person to keep the individual they love but allow them to enjoy a bisexual relationship with another person, my friends older brother has moved to America and he lives in a house with around thirty other people and they all sleep with each other but him and his wife are the masters/caretakers of the house, when my pal went out for a visit she said everyone was lovely and it all seemed too perfect but she couldn’t help but feel like it was a bit like a cult and said everyone seemed too happy and chilled to be normal lol said it felt like everyone including her brother was brainwashed into this idea that they were all happy and putting on a face for the sake of each other.personally I don’t identify as a swinger because when I’m single I enjoy seeing a few guys at a time and getting something from each of them at that time but when I’m in a relationship I’m monogamous but I do love my fab friends and the socialising and the fact that I don’t have to hide my past and that I’m totally honest with who I am and what makes me tick fortunately for me my latest bf understands and has friends who are swingers and is happy to join in the social side of fab with me xx "
Violet could it be , this house you spoke of was just that though, full of very happy people ?. If no religeous or preachy type things going on then just seems like a cult scenario cliche type situation. Did your friend have any chats in private with the other people to make her think the people were not genuinely happy. Xx |
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Louis Theroux’s recent documentary was really interesting. The sensory party looked like fun - even Louis looked like be enjoyed it!
It’s still on the iPlayer - the first of the Altered States ones. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Polyamorous relationships can work providing your not all living in the same house and under each other’s feet.
Look at Swinging couples for example.
How many couples on here have had another couple or single person involved in their relationship over a lengthy period of time.
How many swinging couples regularly attend swinging parties.
So can someone with more wisdom than me kindly explain the difference between swinging couples who meet on a regular basis and a polyamorous relationship between one or more couples |
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" I thought I was in a poly relationship a wee while back with a girl I met on here. Turns out she just wanted to have lots of boyfriends.
You do realise that what you just described is a poly relationship right?
The fact that she wanted and had more than one boyfriend, is literally the definition of polyamory.
D
They need to be aware of each other though. Otherwise all the cheaters can say
It’s just a polygamous relationship. "
This is exactly it, a poly relationship involves the consent of all parties. |
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"Polyamorous relationships can work providing your not all living in the same house and under each other’s feet.
Look at Swinging couples for example.
How many couples on here have had another couple or single person involved in their relationship over a lengthy period of time.
How many swinging couples regularly attend swinging parties.
So can someone with more wisdom than me kindly explain the difference between swinging couples who meet on a regular basis and a polyamorous relationship between one or more couples "
swinging in general is with no emotional connection |
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"Polyamorous relationships can work providing your not all living in the same house and under each other’s feet.
Look at Swinging couples for example.
How many couples on here have had another couple or single person involved in their relationship over a lengthy period of time.
How many swinging couples regularly attend swinging parties.
So can someone with more wisdom than me kindly explain the difference between swinging couples who meet on a regular basis and a polyamorous relationship between one or more couples "
I think we need to differentiate between love and sex. Polyamory means to love more than one person and touches on the fact that, as i said before, we aren't pie. There isn't a limited number of slices that you can give, love is infinite. To me the whole concept of monogamy is abusive because i don't believe its in our nature.
To the other extent, biological drive to mate far and wide, I can completely understand. I think cheating happens when those urges are suppressed, so I welcome diversity in our sexual relationship. The process is open, completely, no secrets and no sneaking around. Trust is the key. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Polyamorous relationships can work providing your not all living in the same house and under each other’s feet.
Look at Swinging couples for example.
How many couples on here have had another couple or single person involved in their relationship over a lengthy period of time.
How many swinging couples regularly attend swinging parties.
So can someone with more wisdom than me kindly explain the difference between swinging couples who meet on a regular basis and a polyamorous relationship between one or more couples
I think we need to differentiate between love and sex. Polyamory means to love more than one person and touches on the fact that, as i said before, we aren't pie. There isn't a limited number of slices that you can give, love is infinite. To me the whole concept of monogamy is abusive because i don't believe its in our nature.
To the other extent, biological drive to mate far and wide, I can completely understand. I think cheating happens when those urges are suppressed, so I welcome diversity in our sexual relationship. The process is open, completely, no secrets and no sneaking around. Trust is the key."
Your first sentence in itself kinda explains it all and I agree with the last paragraph .
Swinging for vast majority is about sex with no strings
Polyamory is more deeper and I get where your coming from, |
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"Polyamorous relationships can work providing your not all living in the same house and under each other’s feet.
Look at Swinging couples for example.
How many couples on here have had another couple or single person involved in their relationship over a lengthy period of time.
How many swinging couples regularly attend swinging parties.
So can someone with more wisdom than me kindly explain the difference between swinging couples who meet on a regular basis and a polyamorous relationship between one or more couples
I think we need to differentiate between love and sex. Polyamory means to love more than one person and touches on the fact that, as i said before, we aren't pie. There isn't a limited number of slices that you can give, love is infinite. To me the whole concept of monogamy is abusive because i don't believe its in our nature.
To the other extent, biological drive to mate far and wide, I can completely understand. I think cheating happens when those urges are suppressed, so I welcome diversity in our sexual relationship. The process is open, completely, no secrets and no sneaking around. Trust is the key.
Your first sentence in itself kinda explains it all and I agree with the last paragraph .
Swinging for vast majority is about sex with no strings
Polyamory is more deeper and I get where your coming from, "
I wouldn't say sex without strings, yes there is a huge proportion of that going on, but what I think a lot of people are actually looking for IS sex with strings. The strings in question are strings of like minded friendships, being able to fulfill that biological directive without all the panic inflicted by the socially accepted moral code of monogamy. Yes there are a lot of people on here just in it for the tour and they can be fun, but a lot of people are here for personality. I think thats where people get so annoyed at cock pics, it's like someone unwrapped your present before you even got it.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For some people I imagine it could work quite well as there are lots of swingers that prefer the same regular partners to play with, more often than not these types of relationships appear from the outside to be a compromise of one person to keep the individual they love but allow them to enjoy a bisexual relationship with another person, my friends older brother has moved to America and he lives in a house with around thirty other people and they all sleep with each other but him and his wife are the masters/caretakers of the house, when my pal went out for a visit she said everyone was lovely and it all seemed too perfect but she couldn’t help but feel like it was a bit like a cult and said everyone seemed too happy and chilled to be normal lol said it felt like everyone including her brother was brainwashed into this idea that they were all happy and putting on a face for the sake of each other.personally I don’t identify as a swinger because when I’m single I enjoy seeing a few guys at a time and getting something from each of them at that time but when I’m in a relationship I’m monogamous but I do love my fab friends and the socialising and the fact that I don’t have to hide my past and that I’m totally honest with who I am and what makes me tick fortunately for me my latest bf understands and has friends who are swingers and is happy to join in the social side of fab with me xx
Violet could it be , this house you spoke of was just that though, full of very happy people ?. If no religeous or preachy type things going on then just seems like a cult scenario cliche type situation. Did your friend have any chats in private with the other people to make her think the people were not genuinely happy. Xx"
She said everyone always accompanied each other to the shops etc no one went anywhere on their own and they didn’t really mix with outsiders but did keep in touch with family and friends but didn’t go out their way to every visit anyone I think she was one of the only visitors because she was like fuxk it I don’t care |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Polyamorous relationships can work providing your not all living in the same house and under each other’s feet.
Look at Swinging couples for example.
How many couples on here have had another couple or single person involved in their relationship over a lengthy period of time.
How many swinging couples regularly attend swinging parties.
So can someone with more wisdom than me kindly explain the difference between swinging couples who meet on a regular basis and a polyamorous relationship between one or more couples
I think we need to differentiate between love and sex. Polyamory means to love more than one person and touches on the fact that, as i said before, we aren't pie. There isn't a limited number of slices that you can give, love is infinite. To me the whole concept of monogamy is abusive because i don't believe its in our nature.
To the other extent, biological drive to mate far and wide, I can completely understand. I think cheating happens when those urges are suppressed, so I welcome diversity in our sexual relationship. The process is open, completely, no secrets and no sneaking around. Trust is the key."
Well I’m monogamous but I believe that at different points in my life I can love someone else and that it’s natural to have more than one great love |
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"For some people I imagine it could work quite well as there are lots of swingers that prefer the same regular partners to play with, more often than not these types of relationships appear from the outside to be a compromise of one person to keep the individual they love but allow them to enjoy a bisexual relationship with another person, my friends older brother has moved to America and he lives in a house with around thirty other people and they all sleep with each other but him and his wife are the masters/caretakers of the house, when my pal went out for a visit she said everyone was lovely and it all seemed too perfect but she couldn’t help but feel like it was a bit like a cult and said everyone seemed too happy and chilled to be normal lol said it felt like everyone including her brother was brainwashed into this idea that they were all happy and putting on a face for the sake of each other.personally I don’t identify as a swinger because when I’m single I enjoy seeing a few guys at a time and getting something from each of them at that time but when I’m in a relationship I’m monogamous but I do love my fab friends and the socialising and the fact that I don’t have to hide my past and that I’m totally honest with who I am and what makes me tick fortunately for me my latest bf understands and has friends who are swingers and is happy to join in the social side of fab with me xx
Violet could it be , this house you spoke of was just that though, full of very happy people ?. If no religeous or preachy type things going on then just seems like a cult scenario cliche type situation. Did your friend have any chats in private with the other people to make her think the people were not genuinely happy. Xx
She said everyone always accompanied each other to the shops etc no one went anywhere on their own and they didn’t really mix with outsiders but did keep in touch with family and friends but didn’t go out their way to every visit anyone I think she was one of the only visitors because she was like fuxk it I don’t care "
To be continued......
We have our next table talk about xxx |
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