FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > Really looking for?
Really looking for?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Interesting some people's responses on here to Sinderellas nice news. Made me think.
The point I make is that other posters on that thread wish to be swept off their feet on a sex/swingers site when they claim to be on here for fun.
Is it any wonder some fabbers get jealous when the person they meet moves on and they've developed feelings for them? There are guys (Mainly referring to guys) on here that will say and do whatever it takes to get a woman into bed and will keep that act up for ages until they are bored and move on.
I've spoken to a few on here who have had unfortunate experiences of such guys moving on from someone else and meeting them, some just socially and when the verification pops up the scorned woman (even though it was supposed to be a casual thing on a sexy site) sets her sites on the new woman, spreading gossip, setting up fake profiles and generally hounding them. I'm sure everyone has heard similar stories. There's one profile notorious for it that I know of.
So are people really honest with themselves about what they're really hoping for on here? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think most people are actually seeking intimacy, affection, attention or validation. Sometimes a combination of them all. Ultimately sex is an easy route to getting them.
That said i think most people are aware of the casual nature of this site and should be accepting of people's wishes to explore. Sadly though as you point out some will say anything and some do end up believing it.
I think the problem arises when people arent honest with themselves. Emotions are feared.
In all my years of being on sites like these my wish for happy ever after has never been a big secret, however I've never once looked for it with anyone I've encountered in this way.
It does work for some people. There are plenty success stories too. Ive seen more happy endings than the big dramas. Thankfully. However i tend to avoid the "scene queens" so maybe that's why. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The amount of people who join a sex site to socialise tells me that no a lot aren't honest with themselves "
Ah that old chestnut!!  .
It's total bullshit! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm married never hidden that fact as we also have a cpls profile.
So maybe I'm not the best to ask but...there are alot of jealousy with some fems on if I meet someone they have met I have had some really crazy stay away messages which I fine hilarious !!
Sometimes I pity guys on here as it's a fekn minefield lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think most people are actually seeking intimacy, affection, attention or validation. Sometimes a combination of them all. Ultimately sex is an easy route to getting them.
That said i think most people are aware of the casual nature of this site and should be accepting of people's wishes to explore. Sadly though as you point out some will say anything and some do end up believing it.
I think the problem arises when people arent honest with themselves. Emotions are feared.
In all my years of being on sites like these my wish for happy ever after has never been a big secret, however I've never once looked for it with anyone I've encountered in this way.
It does work for some people. There are plenty success stories too. Ive seen more happy endings than the big dramas. Thankfully. However i tend to avoid the "scene queens" so maybe that's why. "
Thanks Sinderella, hard to disagree with any of that.
I didn't want to derail your own thread! Good luck again!  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm married never hidden that fact as we also have a cpls profile.
So maybe I'm not the best to ask but...there are alot of jealousy with some fems on if I meet someone they have met I have had some really crazy stay away messages which I fine hilarious !!
Sometimes I pity guys on here as it's a fekn minefield lol"
This is exactly what I was referring to having spoken to some women with a similar experience.
And yet we are continuously reminded on here that guys vastly outnumber women on here and there are plenty of others to pick from! . Seems that not all women subscribe to that notion. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Definitely just casual for me. I'd be very, very shocked if I developed feelings for someone from here any stronger than thinking they're cool and I want to fool around with them.
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I love the social side of fab and I love sex. But I’m very good at compartmentalising aspects of my life. I know there are lines that are not to be crossed.
After a toxic relationship ending, 5 years ago, I have become an ice queen.
I’m not looking for love, i do like my life as it is now. But I’d never rule out the idea of meeting someone special to grow old with.
I don’t expect to meet ‘the one’ on fab!
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By *andsCouple
over a year ago
Edin |
"The amount of people who join a sex site to socialise tells me that no a lot aren't honest with themselves "
I agree with this completely.There are so many sites people could join to socialise with people,so why a sex site?  |
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By *eep.Man
over a year ago
Just a background character |
"
The point I make is that other posters on that thread wish to be swept off their feet on a sex/swingers site when they claim to be on here for fun.
"
I can't see anyone on the other thread stating they want to be swept off their feet on here.  |
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By *eep.Man
over a year ago
Just a background character |
"Definitely just casual for me. I'd be very, very shocked if I developed feelings for someone from here any stronger than thinking they're cool and I want to fool around with them.
"
This is my stance on fab as well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm looking for love but I'm not daft enought to think 'Fab' is the place to find it. Fab for me is to fill a sexual need and nothing more, and hopefully one day my knight in shiny armour will appear.
Good luck sinderella, I'm glad it's finally happened for you.  |
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"I think most people are actually seeking intimacy, affection, attention or validation. Sometimes a combination of them all. Ultimately sex is an easy route to getting them.
That said i think most people are aware of the casual nature of this site and should be accepting of people's wishes to explore. Sadly though as you point out some will say anything and some do end up believing it.
I think the problem arises when people arent honest with themselves. Emotions are feared.
In all my years of being on sites like these my wish for happy ever after has never been a big secret, however I've never once looked for it with anyone I've encountered in this way.
It does work for some people. There are plenty success stories too. Ive seen more happy endings than the big dramas. Thankfully. However i tend to avoid the "scene queens" so maybe that's why. "
Really well said. |
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By *uietbloke67Man
over a year ago
outside your bedroom window ;-) |
Anyone looking for love on here is in the wring shop, however we should always be social and polite that's easy. If I was seeing a woman from here who wasn't seeing other people I'd be scared. |
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By *pheliaWoman
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"I'm looking for love but I'm not daft enought to think 'Fab' is the place to find it. Fab for me is to fill a sexual need and nothing more, and hopefully one day my knight in shiny armour will appear.
Good luck sinderella, I'm glad it's finally happened for you. "
Totally agree. I think its possible to want love, but definitely not be looking for it on here!! People have many sides to them, and different needs. This place fulfils something different in each person |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think maybe some people join thinking they want one thing but then their emotions get the better of them and the green-eyed monster emerges.
The site has many hypocrites, but those people you refer to might well be meeting someone for sex, and even if that guy has been giving them the talk to get what he wants, is it not what they want too? I think it’s a dead cert that the ladies have also been messaging other guys while he is turning the charm onto other ladies. So, no, they are not being honest with themselves. Its called having double standards.
And to anyone who develops feelings for someone they are meeting, well we are all responsible for our own choices and if we make a howler then best just to get your head down, deal with it and learn a valuable lesson. ie, do what it says on the tin NSA sex
As for the troublemakers and gossips, it's pathetic that they stoop so low and even worse that others believe their lies but that’s fab for you, some folk will believe anything told to them as its much more interesting and fun to believe the worst about someone.
It’s no wonder that many people don’t display their verification's.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think maybe some people join thinking they want one thing but then their emotions get the better of them and the green-eyed monster emerges.
The site has many hypocrites, but those people you refer to might well be meeting someone for sex, and even if that guy has been giving them the talk to get what he wants, is it not what they want too? I think it’s a dead cert that the ladies have also been messaging other guys while he is turning the charm onto other ladies. So, no, they are not being honest with themselves. Its called having double standards.
And to anyone who develops feelings for someone they are meeting, well we are all responsible for our own choices and if we make a howler then best just to get your head down, deal with it and learn a valuable lesson. ie, do what it says on the tin NSA sex
As for the troublemakers and gossips, it's pathetic that they stoop so low and even worse that others believe their lies but that’s fab for you, some folk will believe anything told to them as its much more interesting and fun to believe the worst about someone.
It’s no wonder that many people don’t display their verification's.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having been single by choice for almost 10 years. I'm defos being honest and not looking to be swept off my feet. I'm far too independent, like my own space and probs a bit of an ice queen.
If I was looking for the one or a relationship it would most definetley not be on fab! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I woke up with candy floss in my hair, I want to wake up with something else in my hair
How did you get candy floss in your hair "
My sister had a Halloween party. She had a candy floss machine for the kids |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I woke up with candy floss in my hair, I want to wake up with something else in my hair
How did you get candy floss in your hair
My sister had a Halloween party. She had a candy floss machine for the kids "
Not what I had in my head  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No one likes to feel second best or a second choice so no matter how cool or laid back we appear to be, I think most people would admit to feeling slightly miffed if they're dropped like a hot potato when a seemingly better offer comes along. That's when common sense and maturity should kick in though and the realisation that you're on a sex site.
Sinderella hit the jackpot by the sounds of things but we all know the odds of a lottery win. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Interesting thread and I guess this only applies to singletons like myself.We all want different things from here as we are all in different places in our lifes with different past experiances and current situations.Me personally, although this site has been good to me, and still is,I reckon now I would like a relationship with a bit more substance than probably what this place can provide. While I still get a thrill out of meeting new people and new experiances, that thrill is on the wain a little, and I think if I met someone here or on the outside world who felt like me, I would happily give this site up. Until then, I am happy to remain on here as it is still the best place to meet openminded upfront sexy people. |
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I first came on here with the intention of having one night s_ands mainly down to my low self esteem. Having been here a while now I've totally changed my thoughts, good banter and making friends is more important of course I will indulge in sexual activity with the someone I'm attracted to, but genuinely like the banter and when I've got a message I definitely get excited, then forget it's just the bosses thanking me for re-joining lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm quite up front about just looking for one person on the site for sex but sadly not many are looking for the same... I'm definitely not looking for a relationship just a regular playmate but I'm finding what you've said that the majority of guys just say what they do to get into your knickers then its on to the next one. Honesty would be a good thing as it does knock your self confidence a bit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't get this ?
"Guys just say anything to get into your knickers then it's onto the next 1?"
It's a sex site???
What do you expect?
Not having a pop but it is a sex site isn't that what's ment to happen?
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"Having been single by choice for almost 10 years. I'm defos being honest and not looking to be swept off my feet. I'm far too independent, like my own space and probs a bit of an ice queen.
If I was looking for the one or a relationship it would most definetley not be on fab! "
This is a bit like me i have friends that are like your nkt even looking or thinking about settling down and my reply is always the same. For me to even consider it and giving up my personal space etc they would need to be a really exceptional person. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't get this ?
"Guys just say anything to get into your knickers then it's onto the next 1?"
It's a sex site???
What do you expect?
Not having a pop but it is a sex site isn't that what's ment to happen?
"
Just my preference for quality over quantity...good sex with the right person or people is what everyone is after |
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