Police: Knock Knock
Me: who is it ?
Police: It’s the Police
Me: What do you want ?
Police: We just want to talk
Me: How many of you are there
Police: Two
Me: Well talk to each other then !
It’s terrible, but made me laugh. Anyone got any other crap jokes ( a good gag would be even better) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The police came to my door last night holding a picture of my wife.
They asked " is this your wife sir?"
Shocked I answered " yes " !!
They said " I'm afraid it looks like she's been hit by a bus."
I said " I know but she takes it up the arse and she's great with the kids."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The police came to my door last night holding a picture of my wife.
They asked " is this your wife sir?"
Shocked I answered " yes " !!
They said " I'm afraid it looks like she's been hit by a bus."
I said " I know but she takes it up the arse and she's great with the kids."
"
This made me giggle!!  x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was offered sex with a 21 year old girl today. In exchange, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner. Of course I declined, because I am a person with high moral standards and strong willpower. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available with scented lemon or vanilla. |
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"Took my wife to the doctors today to sort out her Tourette's.
Turns out she doesn't have it, I am a c**t and she really does want me to fuck off !!"
This made me laugh for 1st time in 10 years I copied and pasted to facebook
Well done sir  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Took my wife to the doctors today to sort out her Tourette's.
Turns out she doesn't have it, I am a c**t and she really does want me to fuck off !!
This made me laugh for 1st time in 10 years I copied and pasted to facebook
Well done sir "
You're more than welcome sir !!  |
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I went to the doctor's the other day and found out my new doctor is a young female, drop-dead gorgeous!
I was embarrassed but she said, "Don't worry, I'm a professional - I've seen it all before. Just tell me what's wrong and I'll help you in any way I can."
I said, "I think my cock tastes funny..." |
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After her fifth child, Lucy decided that she should have some cosmetic surgery on her cunt to restore herself to her former youthful glory.
Time and childbirth had taken its toll and she reckoned that, with five children now being the limit, she'd tidy things with a nip here and a tuck there.
Following the operation she awoke from her anaesthetic to find three roses at the end of the bed.
"Who are these from?" she asked the nurse. "They're very nice but I'm a bit confused as to why I've received them."
"Well," said the nurse, "the first is from the surgeon - the operation went so well and you were such a model patient that he wanted to say thanks."
"Ahhh, that's really nice!" said Lucy.
"The second is from your husband- he's delighted the operation was such a success that he can't wait to get you home. Apparently it'll be the first time he's touched the sides for years and he's very excited!"
"Brilliant!" said Lucy. "And the third?"
"That's from Eric in the burns unit," said the nurse. "He just wanted to say thanks for his new ears!" |
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