FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > Profile pics???
Profile pics???
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hi, Could anyone explain to me , people ask for a picture with a msg to see who they are talking too...fair enough, why is it when you send a msg with a picture and then all of a sudden you are blocked from that profile without even a no thanks not my type?? Does my head in. ??
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They don't find you attractive
They might know you
Really who gives a fuck...best to concentrate on those that haven't blocked you rather than bothering about those that have. Fab will be a lot more pleasurable for you if you do  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Cheers, I understand what your saying i have had people know me before and not blocked me and if i not attractive for some people fair enough Im not everyones cup of tea... but manners cost nothing |
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"Cheers, I understand what your saying i have had people know me before and not blocked me and if i not attractive for some people fair enough Im not everyones cup of tea... but manners cost nothing"
Not that I am disagreeing with you, but manners cost time and in this day and age nobody has the time....sad really.  |
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the site rules clearly state that deleted and blocked should be taken as a no thank you, not a lack of manners  "
It bugs me too on the rare occasion it’s happened. I am perfectly OK that no reply or a deleted message is a no thank you.
I suppose what bothers me is the implied suggestion that I somehow need to be blocked in order to prevent further messages. I guess it’s a bit “dinnae flatter yersel!”.  |
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I mean, I suppose I can kind of understand it lots more messages have been a problem for some women. But getting blocked literally after one perfectly polite, non suggestive, cock free message with a face pic, from someone with reasonable veris does seem a little premature. |
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"I mean, I suppose I can kind of understand it lots more messages have been a problem for some women. But getting blocked literally after one perfectly polite, non suggestive, cock free message with a face pic, from someone with reasonable veris does seem a little premature. "
You have to learn dude it all about the ratio .The ladies of this site (unless they would hump a duck with a boaby) can quite rightly so be selective of who they want to communicate with .I know they get slated but flip it around
If we men was in the minority we would do exactly the same it something you will never change about fab |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I mean, I suppose I can kind of understand it lots more messages have been a problem for some women. But getting blocked literally after one perfectly polite, non suggestive, cock free message with a face pic, from someone with reasonable veris does seem a little premature. "
It's not premature, it's experience of dealing with it day in day out. Maybe you're not like that but for every one that's nice there's at least 7 who can't take no for an answer, as monkey said too flip it about, guys would do the same if it was them |
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"I mean, I suppose I can kind of understand it lots more messages have been a problem for some women. But getting blocked literally after one perfectly polite, non suggestive, cock free message with a face pic, from someone with reasonable veris does seem a little premature.
It's not premature, it's experience of dealing with it day in day out. Maybe you're not like that but for every one that's nice there's at least 7 who can't take no for an answer, as monkey said too flip it about, guys would do the same if it was them "
I’ve often said to people that I don’t know what is worse - being a guy and having most messages ignored or deleted, or being a woman and having to warmed through hundreds of messages of varying quality.
So much as one follow up message, absolutely - you can see where it’s going. But just after the first message? Harsh! But I can understand it, if people have had bad experiences before.
It just seems a little presumptive - if that first message is perfectly polite and reasonable, with a pic, and with veris, then on the balance of probabilities there shouldn’t be any reason to think the sender will be a dick about not getting a reply.
But I will quite happily concede that I haven’t seen it first hand from your side, and maybe I’m guilty of giving people too much credit!  |
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By *omo65Man
over a year ago
edinburgh |
I can see it from a womans point,they get far to many stupid crude one line messages from single guys. If my message is deleted then i move on ,no point sending another. But to block is bit extreme. I get a lot of messages read but not deleted,but no reply. Should i folow up with another or wait,dont want to be seen as pushy.
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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago
south east |
Why do people get so hung up about being blocked or messages deleted..it happens it's nothing personal unless you were a knob lol just move on til you find someone who does want to converse  |
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"Why do people get so hung up about being blocked or messages deleted..it happens it's nothing personal unless you were a knob lol just move on til you find someone who does want to converse "
I’m certainly not hung up about messages being deleted. And not really bothered about being blocked - it was just a passing comment on here because it cropped up. |
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"
the site rules clearly state that deleted and blocked should be taken as a no thank you, not a lack of manners
It bugs me too on the rare occasion it’s happened. I am perfectly OK that no reply or a deleted message is a no thank you.
I suppose what bothers me is the implied suggestion that I somehow need to be blocked in order to prevent further messages. I guess it’s a bit “dinnae flatter yersel!”. "
hardly! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"They don't find you attractive
They might know you
Really who gives a fuck...best to concentrate on those that haven't blocked you rather than bothering about those that have. Fab will be a lot more pleasurable for you if you do "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I mean, I suppose I can kind of understand it lots more messages have been a problem for some women. But getting blocked literally after one perfectly polite, non suggestive, cock free message with a face pic, from someone with reasonable veris does seem a little premature.
It's not premature, it's experience of dealing with it day in day out. Maybe you're not like that but for every one that's nice there's at least 7 who can't take no for an answer, as monkey said too flip it about, guys would do the same if it was them
I’ve often said to people that I don’t know what is worse - being a guy and having most messages ignored or deleted, or being a woman and having to warmed through hundreds of messages of varying quality.
So much as one follow up message, absolutely - you can see where it’s going. But just after the first message? Harsh! But I can understand it, if people have had bad experiences before.
It just seems a little presumptive - if that first message is perfectly polite and reasonable, with a pic, and with veris, then on the balance of probabilities there shouldn’t be any reason to think the sender will be a dick about not getting a reply.
But I will quite happily concede that I haven’t seen it first hand from your side, and maybe I’m guilty of giving people too much credit! "
Indeed and great to have an optimist on the forums lol. Again though the amount of messages than can come in... sometimes you just genuinely can't answer... we all have real lives and friends here to answer and keep in touch with too. Time CAN be a factor too. It really is the best philosophy to accept it's just part of how it works. There are hundreds of threads on here plus advice from the site itself on how the site functions and hints on how to use it. It really would benefit folk to read up on it  |
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"
the site rules clearly state that deleted and blocked should be taken as a no thank you, not a lack of manners
It bugs me too on the rare occasion it’s happened. I am perfectly OK that no reply or a deleted message is a no thank you.
I suppose what bothers me is the implied suggestion that I somehow need to be blocked in order to prevent further messages. I guess it’s a bit “dinnae flatter yersel!”.
hardly! "
Flip, forums can be hard work!
I’ve said above I can see why women might do that - being bombarded by hundreds of messages is probably bad enough. Being bombarded by even more after a perfectly reasonable indication of ‘thanks, but no thanks’ must be beyond annoying. I get that.
But from my POV, if I’ve sent a single, perfectly polite message I have no problem whatsoever with it languishing unread, or it being deleted. Precisely because I understand that women get a lot of messages and have so have every right to pick and choose. All power to you.
But if I get blocked without actually possibly having caused offence it can feel a little like the person is making an assumption that they think so highly of themselves that I would feel the need to try, try and try again.
And again, I get it - it’s just two sides of the same coin, and different people seeing it differently based on their own experience.
And despite more words, it’s really not something that bothers me - it only started as a passing comment on the subject. |
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"
the site rules clearly state that deleted and blocked should be taken as a no thank you, not a lack of manners
It bugs me too on the rare occasion it’s happened. I am perfectly OK that no reply or a deleted message is a no thank you.
I suppose what bothers me is the implied suggestion that I somehow need to be blocked in order to prevent further messages. I guess it’s a bit “dinnae flatter yersel!”.
hardly!
Flip, forums can be hard work!
I’ve said above I can see why women might do that - being bombarded by hundreds of messages is probably bad enough. Being bombarded by even more after a perfectly reasonable indication of ‘thanks, but no thanks’ must be beyond annoying. I get that.
But from my POV, if I’ve sent a single, perfectly polite message I have no problem whatsoever with it languishing unread, or it being deleted. Precisely because I understand that women get a lot of messages and have so have every right to pick and choose. All power to you.
But if I get blocked without actually possibly having caused offence it can feel a little like the person is making an assumption that they think so highly of themselves that I would feel the need to try, try and try again.
And again, I get it - it’s just two sides of the same coin, and different people seeing it differently based on their own experience.
And despite more words, it’s really not something that bothers me - it only started as a passing comment on the subject. "
if I am not interested in someone, best thing to do is block, don't need to be seeing updates etc when I'm not interested in them |
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"
if I am not interested in someone, best thing to do is block, don't need to be seeing updates etc when I'm not interested in them "
Ah, do blocked people stop their updates appearing in your local updates feed? I guess that’s fair enough.
Isn’t that feed full of lots of people you wouldn’t necessarily be interested in, but just haven’t messaged you?
Or do you skim through that, and block people who haven’t even messaged you?
I guess it is all a bit mad though, that the experience of the site that men and women have is so different. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
the site rules clearly state that deleted and blocked should be taken as a no thank you, not a lack of manners
It bugs me too on the rare occasion it’s happened. I am perfectly OK that no reply or a deleted message is a no thank you.
I suppose what bothers me is the implied suggestion that I somehow need to be blocked in order to prevent further messages. I guess it’s a bit “dinnae flatter yersel!”. "
Youd be amazed the amount of messages i get from the same guys that ive already told no to.. its easier to block |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can see it from a womans point,they get far to many stupid crude one line messages from single guys. If my message is deleted then i move on ,no point sending another. But to block is bit extreme. I get a lot of messages read but not deleted,but no reply. Should i folow up with another or wait,dont want to be seen as pushy.
."
I mass delete every few weeks or so, so if i dont reply then it means No, usually if a woman doesnt reply its a no so i wouldnt bother with a follow up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
the site rules clearly state that deleted and blocked should be taken as a no thank you, not a lack of manners
It bugs me too on the rare occasion it’s happened. I am perfectly OK that no reply or a deleted message is a no thank you.
I suppose what bothers me is the implied suggestion that I somehow need to be blocked in order to prevent further messages. I guess it’s a bit “dinnae flatter yersel!”.
hardly!
Flip, forums can be hard work!
I’ve said above I can see why women might do that - being bombarded by hundreds of messages is probably bad enough. Being bombarded by even more after a perfectly reasonable indication of ‘thanks, but no thanks’ must be beyond annoying. I get that.
But from my POV, if I’ve sent a single, perfectly polite message I have no problem whatsoever with it languishing unread, or it being deleted. Precisely because I understand that women get a lot of messages and have so have every right to pick and choose. All power to you.
But if I get blocked without actually possibly having caused offence it can feel a little like the person is making an assumption that they think so highly of themselves that I would feel the need to try, try and try again.
And again, I get it - it’s just two sides of the same coin, and different people seeing it differently based on their own experience.
And despite more words, it’s really not something that bothers me - it only started as a passing comment on the subject. "
Just a wee point (though see what you're saying) you're presuming the person has not replied potentially because they think highly of themselves... all we are trying to do is explain the tools of the site and how they are used. So... blocking and or deleting messages are merely tools to limit messages not a rejection or declaration of what someone thinks of themselves - no one is entitled to a reply regardless of what anyone thinks of politeness etc - THAT is the site rules |
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"
Youd be amazed the amount of messages i get from the same guys that ive already told no to.. its easier to block"
Sure, I should say that when it’s happened, I kind of understand why it’s happened. My posts here haven’t meant to come across as not getting why, or having a problem with it. Just more about how it seems from the other side.
In my mind this seems reasonable:
1. Message sent
2. Message deleted or no reply
3. Another message sent
4. Sender blocked
Whereas:
1. Message sent
2. Sender blocked
Seems harsh.
But all of this comes from my naive optimism that every knows how to play nice.
It sucks really that there are women on here just looking to meet some decent people, but have to put up with as much crap as you seem to.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Youd be amazed the amount of messages i get from the same guys that ive already told no to.. its easier to block
Sure, I should say that when it’s happened, I kind of understand why it’s happened. My posts here haven’t meant to come across as not getting why, or having a problem with it. Just more about how it seems from the other side.
In my mind this seems reasonable:
1. Message sent
2. Message deleted or no reply
3. Another message sent
4. Sender blocked
Whereas:
1. Message sent
2. Sender blocked
Seems harsh.
But all of this comes from my naive optimism that every knows how to play nice.
It sucks really that there are women on here just looking to meet some decent people, but have to put up with as much crap as you seem to.
"
You're speaking from a logical point of view... fab is different lol  |
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"
Youd be amazed the amount of messages i get from the same guys that ive already told no to.. its easier to block
Sure, I should say that when it’s happened, I kind of understand why it’s happened. My posts here haven’t meant to come across as not getting why, or having a problem with it. Just more about how it seems from the other side.
In my mind this seems reasonable:
1. Message sent
2. Message deleted or no reply
3. Another message sent
4. Sender blocked
Whereas:
1. Message sent
2. Sender blocked
Seems harsh.
But all of this comes from my naive optimism that every knows how to play nice.
It sucks really that there are women on here just looking to meet some decent people, but have to put up with as much crap as you seem to.
You're speaking from a logical point of view... fab is different lol "
LOL! If there’s one thing that Fab isn’t, it’s logical!
It is totally crazy, but almost annoyingly with just the right amount of occasional sanity to make it slightly addictive sometimes! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Youd be amazed the amount of messages i get from the same guys that ive already told no to.. its easier to block
Sure, I should say that when it’s happened, I kind of understand why it’s happened. My posts here haven’t meant to come across as not getting why, or having a problem with it. Just more about how it seems from the other side.
In my mind this seems reasonable:
1. Message sent
2. Message deleted or no reply
3. Another message sent
4. Sender blocked
Whereas:
1. Message sent
2. Sender blocked
Seems harsh.
But all of this comes from my naive optimism that every knows how to play nice.
It sucks really that there are women on here just looking to meet some decent people, but have to put up with as much crap as you seem to.
You're speaking from a logical point of view... fab is different lol
LOL! If there’s one thing that Fab isn’t, it’s logical!
It is totally crazy, but almost annoyingly with just the right amount of occasional sanity to make it slightly addictive sometimes! "
Now there I agree with you totally lol |
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"
Youd be amazed the amount of messages i get from the same guys that ive already told no to.. its easier to block
Sure, I should say that when it’s happened, I kind of understand why it’s happened. My posts here haven’t meant to come across as not getting why, or having a problem with it. Just more about how it seems from the other side.
In my mind this seems reasonable:
1. Message sent
2. Message deleted or no reply
3. Another message sent
4. Sender blocked
Whereas:
1. Message sent
2. Sender blocked
Seems harsh.
But all of this comes from my naive optimism that every knows how to play nice.
It sucks really that there are women on here just looking to meet some decent people, but have to put up with as much crap as you seem to.
"
But how do they know if the guy is decent or not if they're blocking/deleting without reading?
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Youd be amazed the amount of messages i get from the same guys that ive already told no to.. its easier to block
Sure, I should say that when it’s happened, I kind of understand why it’s happened. My posts here haven’t meant to come across as not getting why, or having a problem with it. Just more about how it seems from the other side.
In my mind this seems reasonable:
1. Message sent
2. Message deleted or no reply
3. Another message sent
4. Sender blocked
Whereas:
1. Message sent
2. Sender blocked
Seems harsh.
But all of this comes from my naive optimism that every knows how to play nice.
It sucks really that there are women on here just looking to meet some decent people, but have to put up with as much crap as you seem to.
But how do they know if the guy is decent or not if they're blocking/deleting without reading?
"
We have our ways...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sometimes replying with a no thanks leads to ping pong messages such as, "Can we just chat", "Why not", "Am I not your type then", "What about another time?"
I think that is why the site has stipulated (for a long time now" that a non response etc is a polite no thanks. I know it seems rude but if you were on the other side dealing with god knows how many messages a day then you'd get it. The one that enraged me was when after patiently and politely to several messages he asked "Can't you just fit me in"  I've got worse... now I make my own contact lol "
Ffs all I asked was to borrow some sugar.
Does blocked means you don't have any, does blocked mean I'm a Munster or does blocked mean you only have sweetener.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sometimes replying with a no thanks leads to ping pong messages such as, "Can we just chat", "Why not", "Am I not your type then", "What about another time?"
I think that is why the site has stipulated (for a long time now" that a non response etc is a polite no thanks. I know it seems rude but if you were on the other side dealing with god knows how many messages a day then you'd get it. The one that enraged me was when after patiently and politely to several messages he asked "Can't you just fit me in" I've got worse... now I make my own contact lol
Ffs all I asked was to borrow some sugar.
Does blocked means you don't have any, does blocked mean I'm a Munster or does blocked mean you only have sweetener.
"
Lol it means you can come roon anytime as you bring a cucumber in exchange |
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We very rarely block, mainly because if we do get a negative reaction to not answering I would rather know about it.
We didn't even block our stalker, didn't want to give him the satisfaction of thinking he'd phased us in any way!
But I totally understand the thinking behind blocking straight away; you look at the profile, you know you aren't suited, you block so you never have to waste either of your time again. Makes perfect sense.
I'm just rather nosey and like to know what everyone is up to!
Kat x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
the site rules clearly state that deleted and blocked should be taken as a no thank you, not a lack of manners
It bugs me too on the rare occasion it’s happened. I am perfectly OK that no reply or a deleted message is a no thank you.
I suppose what bothers me is the implied suggestion that I somehow need to be blocked in order to prevent further messages. I guess it’s a bit “dinnae flatter yersel!”.
Youd be amazed the amount of messages i get from the same guys that ive already told no to.. its easier to block"
I've done this too as they reply back asking "are you sure it's a no? Take another look at my picture". I'm like wtf lol! Then I block x |
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" Oh I tend not to block either for the same reasons Encan, filters work just as well lol "
Oh I love to filter, it's akin to natural selection; negative status updates, constantly posting cock pics, fuck now? messages, I want to see them all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Oh I tend not to block either for the same reasons Encan, filters work just as well lol
Oh I love to filter, it's akin to natural selection; negative status updates, constantly posting cock pics, fuck now? messages, I want to see them all "
LOL |
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sorry I'll do better next time 
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