FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > Just a quick question...
Just a quick question...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I know this is a swingers site and I know some people just want to do just that..swing, but what I don't get is, why do people just want to meet, fuck, leave? Personally, I find that really uncomfy and would like to chat, relax and have a wee drink amongst "friends" I hate putting a time to everything because if feels rushed. Why can't people go with the flow?
Is it just me? Am I expecting too much from the said person? |
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"I know this is a swingers site and I know some people just want to do just that..swing, but what I don't get is, why do people just want to meet, fuck, leave? Personally, I find that really uncomfy and would like to chat, relax and have a wee drink amongst "friends" I hate putting a time to everything because if feels rushed. Why can't people go with the flow?
Is it just me? Am I expecting too much from the said person? "
no this is exactly what I look for freindship the sex is a by-product |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not at all. Most women and men prefer to meet in a relaxed atmosphere and see if there's a connection.
I'm the exact same but sometimes (very rarely) I take the mood of a quick meet but I have to have known them beforehand if you know what I mean lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everyone and every meet is different. You get what you pay for, so to speak.
Lots of chat beforehand tends to sort these things out for the benefit of both/all parties.
Works for me anyway. |
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"I know this is a swingers site and I know some people just want to do just that..swing, but what I don't get is, why do people just want to meet, fuck, leave? Personally, I find that really uncomfy and would like to chat, relax and have a wee drink amongst "friends" I hate putting a time to everything because if feels rushed. Why can't people go with the flow?
Is it just me? Am I expecting too much from the said person? no this is exactly what I look for freindship the sex is a by-product"
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Maybe we are doing it wrong!? We are actually the most laid back couple you can come across. We just want a laugh and go with the flow... It's making very difficult to meet a man/couple who want the same :/ |
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"I know this is a swingers site and I know some people just want to do just that..swing, but what I don't get is, why do people just want to meet, fuck, leave? Personally, I find that really uncomfy and would like to chat, relax and have a wee drink amongst "friends" I hate putting a time to everything because if feels rushed. Why can't people go with the flow?
Is it just me? Am I expecting too much from the
said person? "
Everybody is different. That what makes the world.
When all the genuine people like
Is that have this hobby somebody else cannot judge unless they want judged . I and we don't judge anybodys choice .
For us like many genuine people. It's a different thing from friend ship. Way different. Yes a social meet to see if we are all comparable. That's not a friendship meet . That a part of the meet for us.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Me dlt and I are excactly the same, when ( not that we seem to get meets with other couples) we meet, we want to natter first just to see if everyone is relaxed enough to go further |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know this is a swingers site and I know some people just want to do just that..swing, but what I don't get is, why do people just want to meet, fuck, leave? Personally, I find that really uncomfy and would like to chat, relax and have a wee drink amongst "friends" I hate putting a time to everything because if feels rushed. Why can't people go with the flow?
Is it just me? Am I expecting too much from the said person? "
I can hear ya ...im the same .
I could never go to a Hotel and fuck for a couple of hours then leave ..I would feel i was making ya look cheap..
Many people have many reasons and everyone is each to their own ..
Its just not me..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think it's too much to ask! Some people miby just want to do that but be upfront n make it clear. Much more comfy when it's social and easy going |
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There are some people who behave like any hole's a goal and don't care who they meet. Others just don't have a lot of time for whatever reason.
For the most part, we're here to make friends and have sexy fun with them. Occasionally though we have outdoor fun and might seek a couple of guys, but that's rare these days. In that instance we'll exchange a few messages and pics, if I like the look and sound of them then we'll meet.
Any guys we have met that way we still keep in touch with though  |
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"Me dlt and I are excactly the same, when ( not that we seem to get meets with other couples) we meet, we want to natter first just to see if everyone is relaxed enough to go further "
Agree there mrs I personally could not just shag someone there has to be a connection on some level
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Me dlt and I are excactly the same, when ( not that we seem to get meets with other couples) we meet, we want to natter first just to see if everyone is relaxed enough to go further
Agree there mrs I personally could not just shag someone there has to be a connection on some level
"
have to be low level for me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP, you're not asking too much, no way.
This isn't instashag or even close to that, that's why there are socials, you find out about the person and that's where the real interest lies.
Who just wants to be another notch, conquest or, to be blunt. random fuck
Stick to your guns |
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I think most would prefer to know a little about the person/ persons they are possibly going to be sharing your body with.
But at parties and clubs the dynamic change and most just go for it if they fancy someone enough I know I do and it suits my needs just fine  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I like to chat with someone in here for a wee while and get to know the basics.
Then I meet for a coffee and a good blether
Still with me I then arrange to meet for fun and hopefully meet for repeat meets therefore after. Repeat meets also include coffee meets only
My days of going to clubs are long behind me. Feel like a cattle market at some of them now.
Even Private Parties can be stressful.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For some of us it's not about friendships though. I've no interest in making friends from here as I already have great friends, I wouldn't ask them to join Mrs and me though which is where fab comes in |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That's the point
Friendships are for the Vanilla world
This is a site for "Friends with Benefits"
Saying that the original reason I joined the site was to meet like minded people for NSA sexual fun and to experiment with said people various scenarios. More recently my meets have been of a social kind ie in town for a coffee or a spot of lunch and a catch up.
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"That's the point
Friendships are for the Vanilla world
This is a site for "Friends with Benefits"
Saying that the original reason I joined the site was to meet like minded people for NSA sexual fun and to experiment with said people various scenarios. More recently my meets have been of a social kind ie in town for a coffee or a spot of lunch and a catch up.
"
Friendships can be found in every area of life. How people use the site is not dictated by others, it's up to them. |
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"For some of us it's not about friendships though. I've no interest in making friends from here as I already have great friends, I wouldn't ask them to join Mrs and me though which is where fab comes in "
This |
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"I know this is a swingers site and I know some people just want to do just that..swing, but what I don't get is, why do people just want to meet, fuck, leave? Personally, I find that really uncomfy and would like to chat, relax and have a wee drink amongst "friends" I hate putting a time to everything because if feels rushed. Why can't people go with the flow? "
Same here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everyone is looking for something different...and that's fine. It's all about communication. My belief is that friendship is the base from which all else grows though..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think most would prefer to know a little about the person/ persons they are possibly going to be sharing your body with.
But at parties and clubs the dynamic change and most just go for it if they fancy someone enough I know I do and it suits my needs just fine "
Yep my fab journey has taught me what am comfortable with
It did take a few meets to work it out |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We have been dogging before but have only done so with arranged meets from fab. I'm too scared for just anyone to come upto the car or try follow us lol
At a party, you can chat to someone for as long as need be, see how things click and if everything is good then go up stairs or hotel. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I was here as a single, a couple of times I met people & within 5 minutes they were like, "ok, will we get started?" I wasn't really ready, I want comfortable & like you OP I didn't like it. I'm much more of a chat, maybe even eat, char more, wander off to the bedroom at some point kinda guy. Thankfully Mrs J is the same.
mr j |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How does the friendship part work out for those who go to clubs/parties and dogging not knowing who they are going to meet ?  "
I can't speak for the dogging side of things, but we tend to only go to clubs of parties if there are people we know & get on with who are going. In a club, we might take new people to a private room but only after chatting for ages & seeing if we get on. More often than not we only go off with people we already know.
mr j |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I prefer "friends with benefits" I couldn't just fuck without a feeling of friendship and closeness
for me I need a lot of back & forward chat on here first then a meet for coffee and chat, if things progress from there fine, but I have a need to know some background on the person I am going to take to bed and I need to feel I want to be with them.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How does the friendship part work out for those who go to clubs/parties and dogging not knowing who they are going to meet ? "
When a visit clubs a still need to have a wee chat before playing, just doing the sexual act and having no chemistry or connection is a no no for me a found that out pretty quick when a first came on fab |
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