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When girls dont put out....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

When girls don't put out!!

This was written by a guy....

Girls -- Please have a sense of humour!

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.

I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says,

'I don't feel like it,I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to

hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'

We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... She was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She

Was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all Dear,

let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.

You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

very funny.......

suggest you hide behind sofa for a while..

when Steve no looking, view says to the girls ' bloody shocking that' !!!!

views moves up a ladder

steve slides doon the snake lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"very funny.......

suggest you hide behind sofa for a while..

when Steve no looking, view says to the girls ' bloody shocking that' !!!!

views moves up a ladder

steve slides doon the snake lol

"

Of course I totally agree view its shocking!!!

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By *_jkCouple  over a year ago

glasgow


"very funny.......

suggest you hide behind sofa for a while..

when Steve no looking, view says to the girls ' bloody shocking that' !!!!

views moves up a ladder

steve slides doon the snake lol

"

Steve and Views snake, theres a quote I never thought id be using

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By *adcowWoman  over a year ago

kirkcaldy

pmsl steve bloody good one

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

steve ur baws r mine when i see ya lol xxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I thought that hilarious! L xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Best one i've heard in ages lol xxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

very very funny lol.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

brilliant....someone call a doctor...I just split a side...pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

seen it before old ones are alway sthe best

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