your joking

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Got the wife a wooden leg for Christmas. That's not her main present though.....

..... it's just a stocking filler.....

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Got the wife a wooden leg for Christmas. That's not her main present though.....

..... it's just a stocking filler....."

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

What type of phone contract does santa have ?

Pay as you ho ho ho

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why does santa wear a helmet?

Elf & Safety!!

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why is Santa so jolly?

Because he knows where all the naughty girls live

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Why is Christmas just like your job?

You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Why doesn't Santa have any children ?

Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

hubby said,what would you like for Christmas?A widows pension was the reply

By *ary_ArgyllMan over a year ago

Argyll

"hubby said,what would you like for Christmas?A widows pension was the reply

After that I'd check he hasn't increased the life insurance on you!

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Paul bought heather McCartney a wood plane for christmas. She unwrapped it and screams "what the fuck is this i dont do woodwork"

He replied "I know but thought it would be good for shaving ya leg"