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an ode to fifty shades

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

The missus bought a paperback, down saltcoats yesterday.

I had a look inside her bag, twas fifty shades of grey.

Well i just left her to it, at ten i went to bed.

An hour later she appeared, the sight filled me with dread.

In her left she held a rope, and her right a whip!!

She threw them down upon the floor, then she began to strip.

Well fifty years or so ago, i might've had a peek.

But mabel hasnt weathered well, shes eighty four next week.

Watching mabel bump n grind, couldnt have been much grimmer.

and things went from bad to worse, she fell right off her zimmer.

She struggled back upon her feet, a couple of minutes later.

she put her teeth back in and said, "i am the dominator"

Now if you knew mabel, you'd see just why i spluttered.

I spent two months in traction, for the last complaint i uttered.

As she stood there nude & naked, bent forward just a bit.

I went to hold her sensual like, and stood on her left tit.

Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out; my god what had i done ?

She moaned and groaned then shouted out, step on the other one.

Well readers i can tell no more, about what occurred that day.

Suffice to say my jet black hair, turned fifty shades of grey.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

lol, pmsl, lmao, etc etc etc

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