FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > taking no gracefully
taking no gracefully
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We're finding that we're being contacted by couples alot outside of our desired requirements who perhaps haven't taken the time to read our profile content or perhaps they just choose to disregard and try their luck but when we politely decline they seem to get rather annoyed at us and send a huffy indignant message then block us hmm how titillating has anyone else had any similar strange experience's or is it just us? Is there really any point ti having profile content?  or should we try reverse psychology and say that we're into what we're not into in the hopes that we'd be contacted with propositions that secretly we favoured? x |
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"We're finding that we're being contacted by couples alot outside of our desired requirements who perhaps haven't taken the time to read our profile content or perhaps they just choose to disregard and try their luck but when we politely decline they seem to get rather annoyed at us and send a huffy indignant message then block us hmm how titillating has anyone else had any similar strange experience's or is it just us? Is there really any point ti having profile content? or should we try reverse psychology and say that we're into what we're not into in the hopes that we'd be contacted with propositions that secretly we favoured? x"
When I have advised someone they are not what I am looking for, most of the time they thank me for taking time to respond and I never hear anything further. However, occasionally, there will be the odd one who can't take no for an answer. Thank god for the block button! lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some people seem to think if ur on here ur fair game for anyone , stick by ur preferences and always give a polite no thanks and if u get abuse afterwards block is a great tool .  "
i get mail from outwith my preferences, a polite decline message usually works, if they reply back i ignore, after another message from them i delete and block, |
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"at least you get a replay
some on here just block you
for sending a nice message
really am thinking now
"
Some will do that if you don't fit their requirements. I get messages from guys who clearly haven't checked my profile or requirements. Sometimes I get really pissed off and just delete but most of the time I will reply. The bottom line is though, the site rules say that a non response is equal to a not interested so they shouldn't be offended and move on. Instead, we get posts in the forum about how rude women are because they don't reply! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"at least you get a replay
some on here just block you
for sending a nice message
really am thinking now
Some will do that if you don't fit their requirements. I get messages from guys who clearly haven't checked my profile or requirements. Sometimes I get really pissed off and just delete but most of the time I will reply. The bottom line is though, the site rules say that a non response is equal to a not interested so they shouldn't be offended and move on. Instead, we get posts in the forum about how rude women are because they don't reply! "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Theres always gonna be folk who cant accept and dont like the fact that theyre being told no. Just got to ignore them and move on. If they do get huffy, it just makes them look daft really.
I have messages all the time from others who obviously dont read my profile and it gets on my nerves. I dont reply to many anymore as theres no point. Thankfully most can take a hint!
Lx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get a lot of repeat messages from lads I've already said no to, I'm very good at remembering profile pics so I always know it's them even if it's a new name. Used to just ignore and assumed they take the hint now I just block. Had some lovely abuse last night for saying no to adding someone as a friend, charming people on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There'll be Mr Ignored along any minute to tell you the lesst you can do is to reply because his messages are polite and b b b blah de blah.......bets ? lol |
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"I get a lot of repeat messages from lads I've already said no to, I'm very good at remembering profile pics so I always know it's them even if it's a new name. Used to just ignore and assumed they take the hint now I just block. Had some lovely abuse last night for saying no to adding someone as a friend, charming people on here "
That's another bug bear of mine - people sending friend's request when I clearly say don't ask if we haven't chatted. Also, I hate being pestered to add as a friend. If I didn't do it the first time they asked, I'm not likely to change my mind - well not unless you are a total God and can hold a conversation with me. Hey, I'm a woman. I get to change my mind  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There'll be Mr Ignored along any minute to tell you the lesst you can do is to reply because his messages are polite and b b b blah de blah.......bets ? lol"
Lol I hate when folk say that, it just makes me more inclined NOT to message back  |
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"There'll be Mr Ignored along any minute to tell you the lesst you can do is to reply because his messages are polite and b b b blah de blah.......bets ? lol
Lol I hate when folk say that, it just makes me more inclined NOT to message back "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My profile is fairly clear that I'm not looking for any new playmates yet I still get the chancers messaging, I politely tell them thanks but no thanks if its the first time they've contacted me, if its not then they get the block button. |
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By *rallvalCouple
over a year ago
Dunfermline |
"We're finding that we're being contacted by couples alot outside of our desired requirements who perhaps haven't taken the time to read our profile content or perhaps they just choose to disregard and try their luck but when we politely decline they seem to get rather annoyed at us and send a huffy indignant message then block us hmm how titillating x"
we get messages from single guys and couples outside our age ranges or who are smokers despite it being clear on the profile. We politely say no then get messages accusing us of being fake, timewasters etc 
Block & move on..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Unless it's someone exceptional, I only tend to message folk I've met at socials so I don't get nearly as many knock backs as I used to. I don't mind a refusal or no reply, the only ones that sting a bit are the ones that chat away then block you after you send a face pic. Ouch - not subtle |
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By *rallvalCouple
over a year ago
Dunfermline |
"
Maybe they see you have folk on friends list who smoke so seeking clarification ?"
that may be the case but some of our friends are just friends, we may never plan to play together. However that does not excuse the ignorant responses that sometimes follow. |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
" the only ones that sting a bit are the ones that chat away then block you after you send a face pic. Ouch - not subtle "
Some people cant bring themselves to say "Sorry, not for me" once they have chatted a bit...Easier to just block and pretend they never spoke to you...
Wouldnt give these idiots a second thought  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I get a lot of repeat messages from lads I've already said no to, I'm very good at remembering profile pics so I always know it's them even if it's a new name. Used to just ignore and assumed they take the hint now I just block. Had some lovely abuse last night for saying no to adding someone as a friend, charming people on here
That's another bug bear of mine - people sending friend's request when I clearly say don't ask if we haven't chatted. Also, I hate being pestered to add as a friend. If I didn't do it the first time they asked, I'm not likely to change my mind - well not unless you are a total God and can hold a conversation with me. Hey, I'm a woman. I get to change my mind "
Gets on my nerves! I only add people I've met or very likely to meet as I've had some serious stalkers in the past. Just been messaged if I ever actually meet to fuck cause all I do is moan... Aw this place never fails to amuse me |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
When im using this profile, I do not have a problem ignoring and deleting any mail sent to me....
On my couples profile, I always reply even if its no thanx....and daft responses simply get laughed at and ignored!
Coz im nice like that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We're finding that we're being contacted by couples alot outside of our desired requirements who perhaps haven't taken the time to read our profile content or perhaps they just choose to disregard and try their luck but when we politely decline they seem to get rather annoyed at us and send a huffy indignant message then block us hmm how titillating has anyone else had any similar strange experience's or is it just us? Is there really any point ti having profile content? or should we try reverse psychology and say that we're into what we're not into in the hopes that we'd be contacted with propositions that secretly we favoured? x
When I have advised someone they are not what I am looking for, most of the time they thank me for taking time to respond and I never hear anything further. However, occasionally, there will be the odd one who can't take no for an answer. Thank god for the block button! lol "
Ditto! Love my block button. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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we regularly get messages from people outside our specified requirements, so much so that a guy became abusive last weekend and we reported him and put up a message on the forum without naming names. He obviously didnt like it and reported us and we got banned for 48 hours WTF !!!! Probably get banned for another 48 hours now lol but we dont really give a wotsit !!!! |
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Just had a couple (no names) message us we spoke we went offline came back on after about ten minutes only to find three messages each one getting more angry as we never replied then they blocked us ...the bloody cheek of them lol |
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"Just had a couple (no names) message us we spoke we went offline came back on after about ten minutes only to find three messages each one getting more angry as we never replied then they blocked us ...the bloody cheek of them lol "
Patience is a virtue. Obviously, they aren't virtuous |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a lot of problems with abusive messages when I say that someone isn't my type. Have been called a whore on a number of occasions.
What I think is that there is a belief that because you're on a site like this, you're obviously gagging for it & will meet anyone. Some people don't seem to understand that there has to be an attraction there!
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"we regularly get messages from people outside our specified requirements, so much so that a guy became abusive last weekend and we reported him and put up a message on the forum without naming names. He obviously didnt like it and reported us and we got banned for 48 hours WTF !!!! Probably get banned for another 48 hours now lol but we dont really give a wotsit !!!!"
That's pure petulance. I didn't think kids were allowed on this site! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I got called an immature child and told to 'toddle on' then blocked the other day because i didnt message a couple back quick enough. I had already told them i was interested but they mustve took my lack of instant reply as a no lol 
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"I got called an immature child and told to 'toddle on' then blocked the other day because i didnt message a couple back quick enough. I had already told them i was interested but they mustve took my lack of instant reply as a no lol
"
Their loss is my gain! (Hopefully) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Strangely, I quite like it when people say 'no thanks'. I take it that they've given me some sort of consideration, however fleeting. And they've taken some time to let me know. Nice behaviour |
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(J) I try to respond to everyone who messages, even when it's a guy wanting fun with K and I have no personal interest in them.
If I message someone and they don't reply, I just take it as them not being interested and move on. There's only been one exception to this so far where someone deleted my message but I sent it from our couples profile by accident and they weren't looking for couples so I sent another one from my single profile and it got deleted again, so I took that as a sign and crossed her off my list. :P |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
"I got called an immature child and told to 'toddle on' then blocked the other day because i didnt message a couple back quick enough. I had already told them i was interested but they mustve took my lack of instant reply as a no lol
"
I know one couple from your neck of the woods that are very good at this....
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
"we regularly get messages from people outside our specified requirements, so much so that a guy became abusive last weekend and we reported him and put up a message on the forum without naming names. He obviously didnt like it and reported us and we got banned for 48 hours WTF !!!! Probably get banned for another 48 hours now lol but we dont really give a wotsit !!!!"
Chances are he never even saw it...
You cant give out private message details in forum, with or without names...
That probably got you banned... |
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