One of my biggest kinks is a dom sub dynamic. I enjoy setting subs tasks and instructions when they are coming over to visit and we kinda pre agree things we want to explore during that visit.
Anything from dropping a random google maps pin 5-15min walk away from my house telling her to take her pants off in the car leave them on the dash and walk to my house. Text when your at the door and await instructions. Or they will have an ETA to be in my room naked with their pants in their mouth hands by their sides and If they are late there are consequences aka one spank per min.
It’s good fun and usually well received.
So for the subs…share the most random or intense pre meeting instruction you’ve followed
And for the Doms you share your random pre meet instructions/boundarie testers…
For me it’s just about pushing boundaries; mixed it with sexual pleasure or denial of that pleasure.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In my opinion, pants in the mouth is better used if the Dom does it without notice, if your sub is bratty, doesn’t answer correctly or breaks an instructed silence. Obvs there has to be a discussion prior with regards to movements instead of safe words.
I’m a bit funny with outdoor things, subtle things like a sewing needle or two in the bust area of the bra when you’re out together walking the dog etc is fun (depending on subs preferred style of pain) but anything too risqué outdoors isn’t my thing.
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By *x_xWoman
over a year ago
Aberdeen |
For me the best part of the dynamic is establishing a strong bond with one Dom who understands your personal boundaries but someone who pushes you out of your comfort zone simultaneously, the proud feeling afterwards when you know you have pleased him is the high I personally get from the whole experience |
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"For me the best part of the dynamic is establishing a strong bond with one Dom who understands your personal boundaries but someone who pushes you out of your comfort zone simultaneously, the proud feeling afterwards when you know you have pleased him is the high I personally get from the whole experience "
^^^ this |
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Yeah, for me the best preludes are the ones that specifically relate to the dynamic and the kind of play / scene. Random tasks and such can be fun enough but without any context I don't really see them as part of D/s (you could engage in that purely on a top / bottom or partners basis for instance). If there's too much that's purely for the sake of it then it starts to just feel like a power trip (not to mention getting really boring, really quickly).
I definitely admire a bit of creativity in that regard, if it's the same ol' tropes from media I also tend to lose interest fast. |
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I'm all in favour of a playful dynamic and setting a mood of anticipation for play is always good. These 'tasks' however strike me more as dares rather than anything else. However we're all different so if it works for you and those you play with have fun |
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Being with a trusted partner, so you feel safe submitting to them, but then being surprised by an unexpected task / order from them that throws you off balance is such fun.
For example when Miss placed a towel over my hooded face then started to waterboard me unexpectedly
We both love breathplay, but this was totally new, not discussed and quite unexpected |
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"I'm all in favour of a playful dynamic and setting a mood of anticipation for play is always good. These 'tasks' however strike me more as dares rather than anything else. However we're all different so if it works for you and those you play with have fun"
Tasks (for me) were a part of my dynamic in relationship with my dominant. It was progress, growth and was something to scratch the itch most submissives crave. Dares they are most certainly not
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"I'm all in favour of a playful dynamic and setting a mood of anticipation for play is always good. These 'tasks' however strike me more as dares rather than anything else. However we're all different so if it works for you and those you play with have fun
Tasks (for me) were a part of my dynamic in relationship with my dominant. It was progress, growth and was something to scratch the itch most submissives crave. Dares they are most certainly not
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I get that. It was more the specific nature of these tasks but we all like different things |
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"I'm all in favour of a playful dynamic and setting a mood of anticipation for play is always good. These 'tasks' however strike me more as dares rather than anything else. However we're all different so if it works for you and those you play with have fun
Tasks (for me) were a part of my dynamic in relationship with my dominant. It was progress, growth and was something to scratch the itch most submissives crave. Dares they are most certainly not
I get that. It was more the specific nature of these tasks but we all like different things "
Of course |
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"I'm all in favour of a playful dynamic and setting a mood of anticipation for play is always good. These 'tasks' however strike me more as dares rather than anything else. However we're all different so if it works for you and those you play with have fun
Tasks (for me) were a part of my dynamic in relationship with my dominant. It was progress, growth and was something to scratch the itch most submissives crave. Dares they are most certainly not
"
I tend to agree. The tasks may or may not have consequences, but regardless, as a sub I want to please my Dom/Domme, so I will try and do them,vand will be sad if I fail.
Definitely not just dares |
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As an example, a cup full of dry uncooked rice was poured on a pvc sheet. I was cuffed and blindfolded and ordered to move all the rice into a bowl with my mouth.
No reward, no punishment but I wanted to please Miss so did it as well and as fast as I could....whilst she cropped my ass
For me it's part of the submission |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm definitely keeping an eye on this thread
For me the little tasks out of the bedroom are playful but soon become boring especially if your Dom is nowhere near to reward or punish for your efforts, it's also fairly lazy on the Doms part.
I want to build on a D/S dynamic and get to a point where you can ask for and express your deepest desires which i feel is best built-up in person. Its such a complex dynamic and finding a man that I will submit to is a near impossible task. I'm also very easy to Dom in the beginning while I'm getting to know my playmate but once I'm comfortable I am anything but easy and push at his boundaries to see how far I can go (bratty some might say) but I love a playful eliminate and flirty element to D/S play. Many Doms just don't like that in their sub which I understand but doesn't make it an easy task to find a suitable kinky playmate. The search continues.....
Looking forward to reading everyone's take on this especially the Doms xx Mrs WL |
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Yeah, agree a lot of this and was kind of what I was trying to get at - it's not necessarily about reward or punishment, or foreplay or sex. For me it has to be something that forms part of or furthers the agreed dynamic. That doesn't mean it can't be mostly be for funsies but if it's a casual partner asking me to turn up in pretty lingerie at a specific time I wouldn't consider that a 'D/s task'. If it was part of an established, negotiated dynamic, then maybe.
The whole doing things to 'push boundaries' kinda gives me the ick too - I know it's popular shorthand terminology these days but if I want to explore something I'll say so; if something's a boundary then it's there for a reason and I want take kindly to someone unilaterally attempting to mess with it. |
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Rarely get those types of instruction, most ppl on here are after a quickie of some sort! It is exciting sometimes to be told how to be dressed for a meet, and be picked up in a skimpy outfit from a discrete spot.
Difficult to get the balance right with this sort of thing though, sometimes requests are ridiculously fanciful or dangerous.
Cx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For me the best part of the dynamic is establishing a strong bond with one Dom who understands your personal boundaries but someone who pushes you out of your comfort zone simultaneously, the proud feeling afterwards when you know you have pleased him is the high I personally get from the whole experience "
I knew you would be unable to resist this one missy! You didn’t notice your influence in my reply grrrrr |
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By *x_xWoman
over a year ago
Aberdeen |
"For me the best part of the dynamic is establishing a strong bond with one Dom who understands your personal boundaries but someone who pushes you out of your comfort zone simultaneously, the proud feeling afterwards when you know you have pleased him is the high I personally get from the whole experience
I knew you would be unable to resist this one missy! You didn’t notice your influence in my reply grrrrr"
Haha we both know your response was tame by my standards |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For me the best part of the dynamic is establishing a strong bond with one Dom who understands your personal boundaries but someone who pushes you out of your comfort zone simultaneously, the proud feeling afterwards when you know you have pleased him is the high I personally get from the whole experience
I knew you would be unable to resist this one missy! You didn’t notice your influence in my reply grrrrr
Haha we both know your response was tame by my standards "
indeed… |
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"Wasted my life trying find someone that understood me . Wish I’d left Pandora’s box shut tight "
BDSM is my Pandora's Box, it's even being marked in Tattoo form.
While you might think that, i have up on Vanilla relationships in 2002, 2 Long relationships that were way more vanilla than were promised, both times having to suppress my urges (once for the best part of 10 years) and i would take searching over hiding them anyday.
But then neither of us really knows, having not walked in each others shoes.
May you find someone who ticks your boxes soon |
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