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Best / worst pick up lines

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

More interested in the worst.... keen for a few laughs ha

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

First time out in pub after lockdown I got the old “did it hurt when you fell from heaven” I just smiled and nodded,

Then he said “Nope think it must have been when you clawed you’re way out of hell” Still a FWB to this day

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Hahaha good comeback to be fair.

I remember years ago I found this little pick up line book at a jumble sale and that is like the best ones from it. Some of them were absolute belters!

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By *othianGuy41Man over a year ago

anywhere

Excuse me but does this cloth smell wierd?

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By *ORDERMANMan over a year ago

wrexham

The names Bond....

Don't tell me your first name is James....

Actually it's Uni and I'm here to fill your crack

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By *heeky_BudgieMan over a year ago

Belfast

I’m no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock.

Awful.

But I’d like to have the guts to try it, just to see..!

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By *ancognitoMan over a year ago

Glasgow

This one never fails.......HAW Hen! Before ah splash ooh oan the chips N Iran Bru N at, dae ye fuck oan first date?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

-I have to say I'm real jealous of your heart.

-Aww why?

-Because it's beating away inside of you and I'm not

You decide if it’s the best or worst

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Would you like to halvies on an abortion....?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can I smell your fanny?"

"No!"

"Well it must be your feet then"

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By *hav02Man over a year ago

Glasgow/London

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I have a weapon

So get in the van

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By *tarburst babydollMan over a year ago

Dingwall

How do you like your eggs in the morning

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By *tarburst babydollMan over a year ago

Dingwall

That dress looks great. It would look better on my bedroom floor

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The last chat up line I used was 'Here's 10p, phone your mum and tell her you won't be home tonight'. That was 1988 and it didn't work.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I wish you were a washing machine, so I could dump my load inside you.

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By *ald EagleMan over a year ago

Alloa

Are you a Coconut?

Cos I wanna bang you on the table till white stuff cums out.

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By *lpha123XXXMan over a year ago

Clydebank

Nice legs…..what time do they open….

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

How much does a polar bear weigh?

*remove ice cube from drink and stamp on it

Enough to break the ice, my name's .....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Do you like Harry Potter?

Cos I'd love to Slytherin to your Chamber of Secrets

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By *ald EagleMan over a year ago

Alloa

Is your name winter?

Because you’ll be cuming soon.

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By *ald EagleMan over a year ago

Alloa

I’m cold, can I use your thighs as earmuffs?

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By *avie65Man over a year ago

In the west.

Haw hen fancy goin haufers oan a pram?

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

Him : if you can guess what I’ve got in my hand you can keep it

Me: if it only fits in one hand you can bloody keep it

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By *avie65Man over a year ago

In the west.

"Him : if you can guess what I’ve got in my hand you can keep it

Me: if it only fits in one hand you can bloody keep it

Heads to the plastic surgeon for an extension.

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