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Cjs for newbies
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By *at me drink me OP Woman
over a year ago
lothians,scotland(wonderland.down the rabbit hole) lothian |
Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go. |
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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago
Glasgow |
Do a forum search for CJs and you’ll find a host of reassuring and informative threads on this subject.
In short, it’s a safe and fun place. Just keep your head on and you’ll all be fine, safe and hopefully have a funtabulous night. |
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By *eaSlutsCouple
over a year ago
Glasgow |
Hey OP
CJs is a great spot. We went there for our first experience of the scene and absolutely loved it.
It's a very easy going environment which feels like a great big party. Well it did for us at least anyway. We weren't sure what to expect going but once we had the tour and got chatting to people, any concerns melted away.
Downstairs is the more social area with a bar, dance floor, quiet lounge, pole dancing area and more couches. Upstairs is a mix of open and private playrooms of varying types.
As for expectations, nobody will have any of you. If they do, that's their problem to deal with, not yours  The club doesn't operate a "dress down" system like some of the southern clubs do which we think is great. Why spend all the time getting ready just to fling off your outfit (not that there's a problem with that)?
If you're thinking about it, just go for it Go along and don't be afraid to chat away to people. We found everyone we spoke to very welcoming and up for a laugh.
Feel free to message us with any specific questions you might have too, more than happy to help where we can
C x |
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By *at me drink me OP Woman
over a year ago
lothians,scotland(wonderland.down the rabbit hole) lothian |
"Id want to do both .i work late saturdays so would have to take a holiday to go
They do some Fri nights and a Wed afternoon sometimes too "
I work late friday nites and wed day time aswel |
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The best thing I can say about CJ's is not to expect anything. If you go thinking something will happen, or such, you're likely to be dissapointed.
Just think of it as a night in a normal pub/club, where you might click with someone, and if you do? Instead of a walk of shame the next day, you just have a short walk upstairs to a private room, unless you wanna be a bit more public.
It may be adventageous if you have a friend you can go with or arrange to get along to one of the pre-drink events that some people organise. That would allow you to get to know some people in a totally neural location.
Mandy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Id want to do both .i work late saturdays so would have to take a holiday to go
They do some Fri nights and a Wed afternoon sometimes too
I work late friday nites and wed day time aswel"
Like you, shifts get in the way
Been to a few similar places in the past and what I know of CJ’s it operates in the same friendly vein
Enjoy if you can |
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By *ane DTV/TS
over a year ago
Glasgow ish |
For most of the Saturday events, there is a pre drinks posted.
That way you can meet folk in a non club setting and ask questions.
Think of the club as a social event with options.
No means No and if you do make a connection, then you don't have to go to someone's home or take them to yours.
J |
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By *N007Couple
over a year ago
clacks |
We attended cjs for our first time a few months ago and went to predrinks which definitely helped. We went at the weekend there and had such a good time and sat and spoke with people we had previously met. M has severe social anxiety and his first time he was so nervous but everyone was great with him and this time around he was a lot more relaxed but again people kept checking in with him. I love the social side of it and would prefer to go here even just for the night out. Its great being with like minded people.x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go."
I sent CJs a message and got a comprehensive reply from them, very reassuring.
I've not been to any socials (missed the Dundee one the other day because I was working late), and as a single guy it'd be great to get along and meet folk, just to get my head above the parapet. Pretty sure though when I do go if there is a predrinks thread posted up, or even post my own "I'm going and new, please be nice" thread the lovely folk on here will respond 
Would be great to make some connections on here... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Speaking as someone who has mostly attended as a single guy (though also on a few occasions with female friends), I can assure you that you will not feel out-of-place for more than 30-seconds, once you arrive.
I remember my first time, and how petrified I was on my way there and stepping inside 
However, that stopped immediately when I was welcomed warmly by the staff, and given a quick tour around the various rooms.
From that moment on, I simply went down to the bar to get a soft-drink, soon ended up chatting to a couple standing beside me, and the night only got more fun from there 
As someone who hasn’t always been the most confident in the past, and who has struggled with social-anxiety and awkwardness when I was a bit younger, attending CJs (and a few other clubs) has really boosted my confidence and made me more assertive and fun in other areas of my life (or so I think, anyway, lol).
To the lovely ladies above who have expressed a wish to attend, believe me, you will be made extremely welcome. If anything, when you go upstairs you might find the amount of attention from the male attendees slightly overwhelming at first, but the vast majority of men are respectful (or they’d be swiftly out the door!) and everyone understands that ‘no means no’. Downstairs, the vibe is much more relaxed and like a nightclub, and there is no expectation on you to do (or not to do) anything: some people spend all night downstairs, some people spend all evening upstairs, and there are people at every point in the spectrum in between.
Lastly, if any ladies would like someone to accompany them (perhaps after first having a social meet beforehand), I would be more than happy to oblige; just send me a private-message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go."
Was that the party at the borders |
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By *at me drink me OP Woman
over a year ago
lothians,scotland(wonderland.down the rabbit hole) lothian |
"Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go.
Was that the party at the borders "
I was at the borders .i sat in the kitchen most of the time talking to an older couple .went upstair with 1 guy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go.
Was that the party at the borders
I was at the borders .i sat in the kitchen most of the time talking to an older couple .went upstair with 1 guy"
I know. I was there |
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By *at me drink me OP Woman
over a year ago
lothians,scotland(wonderland.down the rabbit hole) lothian |
"Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go.
Was that the party at the borders
I was at the borders .i sat in the kitchen most of the time talking to an older couple .went upstair with 1 guy
I know. I was there "
i just felt out of place |
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"Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go.
Was that the party at the borders
I was at the borders .i sat in the kitchen most of the time talking to an older couple .went upstair with 1 guy
I know. I was there i just felt out of place"
I saw you mention anxiety somewhere, and know that it can be difficult to deal with at times.
Maybe it might be worthwhile getting to know some women from here, that go to CJ's and if you get on, it'll be someone that you can go along with and be a friendly face in advance.
Yea I know that means extra time, but I've no doubt someone will happily hold your hand on your first vist or two.
Mandy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go.
Was that the party at the borders
I was at the borders .i sat in the kitchen most of the time talking to an older couple .went upstair with 1 guy
I know. I was there i just felt out of place"
Most of us did. It was a strange party the group chat was fun |
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By *at me drink me OP Woman
over a year ago
lothians,scotland(wonderland.down the rabbit hole) lothian |
"Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go.
Was that the party at the borders
I was at the borders .i sat in the kitchen most of the time talking to an older couple .went upstair with 1 guy
I know. I was there i just felt out of place
Most of us did. It was a strange party the group chat was fun "
Yeah was nice to chat in the group.I think there was a few people there well known to swinging a guy i had met on fab took me. Felt sorry for him having to baby sit me.we left before the bad shit kicked of |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go.
Was that the party at the borders
I was at the borders .i sat in the kitchen most of the time talking to an older couple .went upstair with 1 guy
I know. I was there i just felt out of place
Most of us did. It was a strange party the group chat was fun
Yeah was nice to chat in the group.I think there was a few people there well known to swinging a guy i had met on fab took me. Felt sorry for him having to baby sit me.we left before the bad shit kicked of"
Lucky for you. It was weird everyone running out
I'm in a kik group if you fancy getting added |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Id want to do both .i work late saturdays so would have to take a holiday to go
They do some Fri nights and a Wed afternoon sometimes too
I work late friday nites and wed day time aswel"
My first trips were the afternoon parties on Wednesdays and Thursdays and I always found them friendly and welcoming |
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By *4pu55yMan
over a year ago
Falkirk |
"I’m like you op..would love to go, but don’t want to feel out of place "
Lady Tease,
I've never been but can't see someone as spectacular as you standing out, more likely be the center of attraction xx |
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"We are both definitely keen on going too but very nervous and not really sure what to expect. "
Don't expect anything.
It's a Swingers club, not a sex club. You can socialise downstairs, and then if you click with people or get nosey, you can head upstairs to the playrooms. Mind you there's often a lot of socilising going on in the foyer area upstairs too, the suite at the top is good for chatting to folk.
Mandy |
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"I would love to attend an event at cjs However I don’t think I could do it alone x"
You're never alone. As long as you'r social and chatty, someone will speak to you.
The alternative is to decie on a night you'd like to go along to (I'd recomend the Fun For All Nights) get booked in, and then look for the Pre-Drinks thread that pops up. A couple of wonderful and friendly women organise them, where it's a meet in a neutral pub that gives you a chance to speak to folk before CJ's and may help take away some of your stress and wories.
Mandy |
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It's not clubby like a nightclub or the sex party clubs you'd see on most porn online. It's more a big empty basically. Kind of like a party you see on TV at a large American Manor house or frat house (the building I mean not the partying style). There isn't loud banging music with folk dancing really. Downstairs there's a mix of social areas which are basically couches and tables and chairs. Upstairs a mix of themed play rooms (doctors room, dungeon, room, porn room with couches a large bed and projector showing porn). Also a couples only room with multiple beds and swing which is my preferred one (only been with a partner). You can be seen by others in all but one room so if you aren't comfortable playing in front of others or get stage fright it's maybe not for you in terms of playing there. There's a lockable private room with one bed but that gets snapped quickly usually. It can be great foreplay wa ching and being around othee like minded folk though and a means of chatting to others and if you click with them setting up future fun. There's a shower room and you can get changed there. You bring your own booze and mixers and it gets kept at the bar. There is a group of regulars who often don't play and its just a social thing for them but they are also usually the most welcoming and will come say to any deer in the head lights folk they see. CJ will give you a tour around and the staff are great. Keep in mind everyone there is some kind of non vanilla or sexually adventurous person so you're among friends. Don't feel awkward or self concious. There's all shapes, sizes, ages, colours and genders and sexualities. That's the beauty of it. Halloween is a good night to go as you can wear a mask or costume make up etc and feel a bit more like you're someone else an dmire anonymous which may help. Will be a busier even with lots of new or infrequent visitors x |
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We have decided to take our first plunge into the “scene” and booked into attended the couples/single females night on the 12th of November.
Already slightly nervous about what to wear etc and what to expect, but have had some great advice already from a couple of couples that have been before!!
We are going with no set expectations or hang ups and will just see what happens!!! If anybody else is planning on going would be cool to chat first, so feel free to PM us!!
M&J |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Speaking as someone who has mostly attended as a single guy (though also on a few occasions with female friends), I can assure you that you will not feel out-of-place for more than 30-seconds, once you arrive.
I remember my first time, and how petrified I was on my way there and stepping inside
However, that stopped immediately when I was welcomed warmly by the staff, and given a quick tour around the various rooms.
From that moment on, I simply went down to the bar to get a soft-drink, soon ended up chatting to a couple standing beside me, and the night only got more fun from there
As someone who hasn’t always been the most confident in the past, and who has struggled with social-anxiety and awkwardness when I was a bit younger, attending CJs (and a few other clubs) has really boosted my confidence and made me more assertive and fun in other areas of my life (or so I think, anyway, lol).
To the lovely ladies above who have expressed a wish to attend, believe me, you will be made extremely welcome. If anything, when you go upstairs you might find the amount of attention from the male attendees slightly overwhelming at first, but the vast majority of men are respectful (or they’d be swiftly out the door!) and everyone understands that ‘no means no’. Downstairs, the vibe is much more relaxed and like a nightclub, and there is no expectation on you to do (or not to do) anything: some people spend all night downstairs, some people spend all evening upstairs, and there are people at every point in the spectrum in between.
Lastly, if any ladies would like someone to accompany them (perhaps after first having a social meet beforehand), I would be more than happy to oblige; just send me a private-message."
Answered a lot of questions we had thanks  |
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"Iv been to 1 social party and felt so out of place(social anxiety &live in my own bubble lol)but id like to try a club . Looking for help on what to expect if i was to go."
We attended CJs couples and females night, our first ever adventure. We were nervous but we were warmly welcomed and given a tour then left to socialise. We met a few people and talked with them. As the night went on we met more and watched what was going on too. We never got brave enough to do anything ourselves but we never felt pressured to. It was a good experience, so our advice would be to go in with no expectations and no pressure on yourself to do anything and just treat it as a wee night out. If its not for you, you can just leave. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some great answers here but here is out opinion for what its worth.
we've been a couple of times and love it, no pressure to participate, loads of lovely people and plenty to see and do. We would suggest doing what we did which was go on the couples and single woman night. We found it very relaxed and definatly helped us knowing there was no single men there. Its bring your own drink which is cool and they have loads of rooms including,
DOWNSTAIRS
Toilets
Smoking area
Several chill/nightclub style rooms including one with a stripper pole.
Bar
Kitchen
Chill/social rooms
Snacks
Soft drink
UPSTAIRS
cinema room, eg porn on a projector.
A sex dungeon with cage, sex swing and a couple of bdsm restraining devices.
medical room
A room with 2 single beds for same room swapping.
A room with sex furniature
One with 3 double beds all shoved together for orgys I guess.
From memory all rooms are lockable apart from the dungeon one and all have windows on the doors and internal locks, the windows all have shutters/ blinds so you can decide if you wanna be watched or not and even if the door is left unlocked and open you still have full say if anyone can join you or enter. All in all its great fun.
Each room has a 45 min max and no drinks allowed in the rooms.
Basically.. to summarise... its A club you can take your own drink to, theres more woman than men everyone is friendly and most folk put out or are open to some sort of play wit the right couple or person. Feel free to ask if you have any other questions but definatly don't be nervous. It's a brilliant night, we are also more than happy to meet any first timers for a drink before and answer any questions, it also means you aren't turning up alone. Cj herself is super chill and fun and any newbies get a tour by her and can ask whatever they want too. |
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"Some great answers here but here is out opinion for what its worth.
we've been a couple of times and love it, no pressure to participate, loads of lovely people and plenty to see and do. We would suggest doing what we did which was go on the couples and single woman night. We found it very relaxed and definatly helped us knowing there was no single men there. Its bring your own drink which is cool and they have loads of rooms including,
DOWNSTAIRS
Toilets
Smoking area
Several chill/nightclub style rooms including one with a stripper pole.
Bar
Kitchen
Chill/social rooms
Snacks
Soft drink
UPSTAIRS
cinema room, eg porn on a projector.
A sex dungeon with cage, sex swing and a couple of bdsm restraining devices.
medical room
A room with 2 single beds for same room swapping.
A room with sex furniature
One with 3 double beds all shoved together for orgys I guess.
From memory all rooms are lockable apart from the dungeon one and all have windows on the doors and internal locks, the windows all have shutters/ blinds so you can decide if you wanna be watched or not and even if the door is left unlocked and open you still have full say if anyone can join you or enter. All in all its great fun.
Each room has a 45 min max and no drinks allowed in the rooms.
Basically.. to summarise... its A club you can take your own drink to, theres more woman than men everyone is friendly and most folk put out or are open to some sort of play wit the right couple or person. Feel free to ask if you have any other questions but definatly don't be nervous. It's a brilliant night, we are also more than happy to meet any first timers for a drink before and answer any questions, it also means you aren't turning up alone. Cj herself is super chill and fun and any newbies get a tour by her and can ask whatever they want too. "
You can't lock the couples room or lock the open/orgy room or shut the door to my knowledge(seems to be my favourite room) 
There's only a window on the private room(s) at the back.
The times allowed in the rooms can vary depending on how busy it is, only got 20mins last time.
Never been to a couples/fem night but enjoy the fun for all as feels very social |
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"Do u have to book in to cjs"
I feel same as u do, but I think I'm going to go to a pre drinks meet first to get to know people,I am also on the chat group to get to know people b4 I go to thats as well .. I'd feel very out of place, hence I want to get to know people first x |
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We've only been on fun for all nights but always had an amazing time.
We've not always played with others when there & there is no pressure to do so.
We have witnessed some people who seem to think that as they have paid to attend, that makes them entitled to play with others but that is definately not the case for the majority of people. |
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