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Bi Guys
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Enquiring minds gotta know 
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"Honestly, I think the "bad rep" is due to biphobia, plain and simple." This. 100% | |||
"Honestly, I think the "bad rep" is due to biphobia, plain and simple." This. | |||
"Honestly, I think the "bad rep" is due to biphobia, plain and simple." Yep..I agree  | |||
"Honestly, I think the "bad rep" is due to biphobia, plain and simple." 100% this! I’ve seen countless profiles of cis women claiming they don’t want to be meet bisexual men stating that “it’s just my preference”. I don’t think there’s any justification for how this isn’t biphobia. Them being bi should make absolutely no difference to you if you’re meeting them one on one. | |||
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"Il answer that as a female that dosnt want to have sex with bi males. Because I don't want to.it really is that simple. No clue why it ruffles so many feathers..I'm not slim Do I moan about guys only wanting to meet slim birds.no.concentrate on those that are looking to meet bi guys rather than trying to call out those who don't. Everyone gets some in the long run. "Purely out of interest, what drives the desire not to? I'm not trying to call you out or anything, each to their own, but it would be interesting to hear what reasons people come to for not having interest in bi men but don't mind straight men.  | |||
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"Sure. The thought of 2 guys having sex does absolutely nothing for me so that would obviously be in my mind meeting a bi guy.why should me or him not give 100% when meeting so no point. Same as others not willing to meet smokers that would still be in their mind.the only prejudice is colour there's not 1 excuse for that! But when it comes to sexual preferences..it really is just that.preference.folk banding the word homophobic about need to calm the feck down." First of all, I'd like to highlight the obvious and say that of course no one is asking anyone to have sex with anyone else if they don't want to, *regardless what the reasons are*. No one is telling anyone else what to do with themselves and their bodies. Now that that's out of the way, as you well say, saying no to e.g. sleeping with any and every black guy is likely because of internalised racism. I don't see how the same doesn't apply to bi men. When a bi man is with you he is with you and with no one else, man or woman. If you are kissing a bi guy, would you really be thinking about him kissing guys? I don't think it's at all the same as smoking btw, 'cause that's something that you can clearly taste while you are kissing him. I don't think you will taste the tongues of the hot men he has kissed. | |||
"why should me or him not give 100% when meeting so no point." I wonder if you feel that because a guy is bi he might not be into you as much as a straight guy would? | |||
"Honestly, I think the "bad rep" is due to biphobia, plain and simple." Yep this | |||
"Sure. The thought of 2 guys having sex does absolutely nothing for me so that would obviously be in my mind meeting a bi guy.why should me or him not give 100% when meeting so no point. Same as others not willing to meet smokers that would still be in their mind.the only prejudice is colour there's not 1 excuse for that! But when it comes to sexual preferences..it really is just that.preference.folk banding the word homophobic about need to calm the feck down. First of all, I'd like to highlight the obvious and say that of course no one is asking anyone to have sex with anyone else if they don't want to, *regardless what the reasons are*. No one is telling anyone else what to do with themselves and their bodies. Now that that's out of the way, as you well say, saying no to e.g. sleeping with any and every black guy is likely because of internalised racism. I don't see how the same doesn't apply to bi men. When a bi man is with you he is with you and with no one else, man or woman. If you are kissing a bi guy, would you really be thinking about him kissing guys? I don't think it's at all the same as smoking btw, 'cause that's something that you can clearly taste while you are kissing him. I don't think you will taste the tongues of the hot men he has kissed." as I said.yes I honestly would.thats why I don't do it.im not looking for anyone else to try understand but that's just me.simple.i used the smoking example because only an non smoker would always be thinking its that smoke I smell or taste..even if they can't it's in their mind. As I said earlier try to focus on who wants to meet bi guys rather than those in the minority that don't. | |||
"Sorry to barge in again but this made me think: why should me or him not give 100% when meeting so no point. I wonder if you feel that because a guy is bi he might not be into you as much as a straight guy would? " ha!! Absolutely not lol that's just silly.iv known plenty of bi guys through the yrs on here and in real life and believe me they are all men lol. | |||
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"I don't see why anyone needs to justify their sexual preferences to anybody on here. Isn't this "preference shaming"? I fail to see how I'm being prejudiced against someone if I chose not to let them penetrate me but otherwise treat them the same as every other individual I interact with. " Would you ride a Tory, though? | |||
"I don't see why anyone needs to justify their sexual preferences to anybody on here. Isn't this "preference shaming"? I fail to see how I'm being prejudiced against someone if I chose not to let them penetrate me but otherwise treat them the same as every other individual I interact with. Would you ride a Tory, though? " C'mon tae fuck...I have some standards! | |||
"I don't see why anyone needs to justify their sexual preferences to anybody on here. Isn't this "preference shaming"? I fail to see how I'm being prejudiced against someone if I chose not to let them penetrate me but otherwise treat them the same as every other individual I interact with. Would you ride a Tory, though? C'mon tae fuck...I have some standards!" What if they promised not to be Toryish around you? | |||
"I don't see why anyone needs to justify their sexual preferences to anybody on here. Isn't this "preference shaming"? I fail to see how I'm being prejudiced against someone if I chose not to let them penetrate me but otherwise treat them the same as every other individual I interact with." I don't think anyone is saying that you cannot have your preferences, of course you do, we all do. But as humans we don't work in isolations and our personal preferences are shaped by the world we live in. I think there is some value in asking one self where these preferenced stem from. | |||
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"I don't see why anyone needs to justify their sexual preferences to anybody on here. Isn't this "preference shaming"? I fail to see how I'm being prejudiced against someone if I chose not to let them penetrate me but otherwise treat them the same as every other individual I interact with. I don't think anyone is saying that you cannot have your preferences, of course you do, we all do. But as humans we don't work in isolations and our personal preferences are shaped by the world we live in. I think there is some value in asking one self where these preferenced stem from." Any kind of behaviour, sexual or not, can automatically flick my "on" switch to "off" when I meet people. It could be a comment, a mannerism, or a sexual behaviour. I don't feel the need to dissect and peer into the arsehole of every decision I make. I'm confident that I'm balanced and fair when dealing with people. Every knock back isn't rooted in a "-phobia". | |||
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"I’m really into bi guys! Generally prefer then to straight men lol " You're heterophobic love. Own it!  | |||
"...hope the wee fella who knocked me back last week is reading this. Ageist wee cunt."  ageistphobic  | |||
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"This thread is makinge feel irrationality averse to phobia's. " PHOBOPHOBIA!!!! Oh no!!! Strange as it may sound, it’s the person that excites me. Personality shines for me every time regardless of age, sexual orientation, height, ethnic origin and so on. (Exception to that rule is same as Miss Muff mind you ) | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here." Thanks for highlighting that important difference | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here." Not really wanting to get into a big debate but in the same way you respectfully have pointed out… yes white people do experience racism too. Perhaps not to the degree of others but they do | |||
"I don't see why anyone needs to justify their sexual preferences to anybody on here. Isn't this "preference shaming"? I fail to see how I'm being prejudiced against someone if I chose not to let them penetrate me but otherwise treat them the same as every other individual I interact with. I don't think anyone is saying that you cannot have your preferences, of course you do, we all do. But as humans we don't work in isolations and our personal preferences are shaped by the world we live in. I think there is some value in asking one self where these preferenced stem from. Any kind of behaviour, sexual or not, can automatically flick my "on" switch to "off" when I meet people. It could be a comment, a mannerism, or a sexual behaviour. I don't feel the need to dissect and peer into the arsehole of every decision I make. I'm confident that I'm balanced and fair when dealing with people. Every knock back isn't rooted in a "-phobia"." | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here." So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society? | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here. So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society?" Then you'd be classed as a minority....cause not many folk are heterophobic. | |||
"Il answer that as a female that dosnt want to have sex with bi males. Because I don't want to.it really is that simple. No clue why it ruffles so many feathers..I'm not slim Do I moan about guys only wanting to meet slim birds.no.concentrate on those that are looking to meet bi guys rather than trying to call out those who don't. Everyone gets some in the long run. "100% | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here. So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society?" I'm saying no one suffers from heterophobia. But anyway, there is no point in me trying to keep a conversation once y'all taken over again, I'm out of here | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here. So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society? I'm saying no one suffers from heterophobia. But anyway, there is no point in me trying to keep a conversation once y'all taken over again, I'm out of here "Everyone has an opinion or viewpoint, you’ve very much put forward some valid and interesting points. So have others though, that’s what the forums should be for so bit lost as to that  | |||
" So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society?" What a moronic take. Heterosexual people don’t have a history of discrimination against them in the same way that LGBTQ people do, so it’s absolutely ridiculous to compare that. Just to echo some of the points made in the thread - nobody is telling anyone that they should sleep with any particular type of person, but I think it’s important to highlight that if the ONLY reason you don’t want to get with someone in a one on one scenario is due to them being bisexual, you’re probably biphobic. | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here. So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society? I'm saying no one suffers from heterophobia. But anyway, there is no point in me trying to keep a conversation once y'all taken over again, I'm out of here "Jeezo! I moved on from light, funny, and somewhat peurile to an attempt at serious debate, and you bugger off? | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here. So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society? I'm saying no one suffers from heterophobia. But anyway, there is no point in me trying to keep a conversation once y'all taken over again, I'm out of here
Everyone has an opinion or viewpoint, you’ve very much put forward some valid and interesting points. So have others though, that’s what the forums should be for so bit lost as to that "Hey, I'm all up for that. What makes me give up is when thatcrew comes in and start making easy childish jokes derailing the thread and taking over. | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here. So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society? I'm saying no one suffers from heterophobia. But anyway, there is no point in me trying to keep a conversation once y'all taken over again, I'm out of here
Jeezo! I moved on from light, funny, and somewhat peurile to an attempt at serious debate, and you bugger off? "I doubt trying was your intention, but in any case, you didn't make it. | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here. So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society? I'm saying no one suffers from heterophobia. But anyway, there is no point in me trying to keep a conversation once y'all taken over again, I'm out of here
Everyone has an opinion or viewpoint, you’ve very much put forward some valid and interesting points. So have others though, that’s what the forums should be for so bit lost as to that
Hey, I'm all up for that. What makes me give up is when thatcrew comes in and start making easy childish jokes derailing the thread and taking over."There’s usually a good dash of humour goes along with most threads on the Scottish forum. Appreciate how awful it’s been for sexual minorities. It’s disgraceful that Oscar Wilde was only given a pardon recently for homosexuality (2017 I think). All minorities tend to react hotly when freedom is realised (women did too) but I think you’re missing a lot of folk are supporting your point too. | |||
"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here. So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society? I'm saying no one suffers from heterophobia. But anyway, there is no point in me trying to keep a conversation once y'all taken over again, I'm out of here
Jeezo! I moved on from light, funny, and somewhat peurile to an attempt at serious debate, and you bugger off?
I doubt trying was your intention, but in any case, you didn't make it."Agreed! I also agree, in hindsight, that my previous post was rather moronic. I struggle with comprehension at times, on certain matters, and know I'm not as smart as I think I am. I'll take my nonsense elsewhere and leave you be with your thread. | |||
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"I understand we want to keep things light and funny, but I'd like to highlight what I consider an important difference. We live in a society in which for hundreds of years homosexuality has been persecuted, condemned and painted as something abhorrent. This had a huge imoact culturally too, we can still clearly see it. The same way you cannot be racist against white people, you cannot be "heterophobic": heterosexuality has never been culturally and institutionally persecuted, there is no systemic issue that has left its cultural mark here. So, if, lets say, tomorrow I begin to irrationally hate all heterosexual people, are you saying I can't identify as heterophobic, purely because it's not rife in society? I'm saying no one suffers from heterophobia. But anyway, there is no point in me trying to keep a conversation once y'all taken over again, I'm out of here
Everyone has an opinion or viewpoint, you’ve very much put forward some valid and interesting points. So have others though, that’s what the forums should be for so bit lost as to that
Hey, I'm all up for that. What makes me give up is when thatcrew comes in and start making easy childish jokes derailing the thread and taking over."You make several points very well. But a number of people disagree with them, myself included. Your main issue seems to be when people don't accept your opinion as gospel. | |||
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"I still ain't sleeping with bi guys "What about gay guys? | |||
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"From experience, orally bi is far more common and easier to find. I am top and orally bi only, which is not only fine for most dressers but probably preferred." Genuine question as I'm curious, do you think that's cause a lot of guys think if they don't do anal then it's not as big a deal? Are they a bit squeamish (for want of a better word!) Or just fewer into it? | |||
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"Honestly, I think the "bad rep" is due to biphobia, plain and simple. 100% this! I’ve seen countless profiles of cis women claiming they don’t want to be meet bisexual men stating that “it’s just my preference”. I don’t think there’s any justification for how this isn’t biphobia. Them being bi should make absolutely no difference to you if you’re meeting them one on one. " | |||
"Honestly, I think the "bad rep" is due to biphobia, plain and simple. 100% this! I’ve seen countless profiles of cis women claiming they don’t want to be meet bisexual men stating that “it’s just my preference”. I don’t think there’s any justification for how this isn’t biphobia. Them being bi should make absolutely no difference to you if you’re meeting them one on one. " If I like a guy, doesn't matter to me if he's bi or not. But then I don't consider myself to be a "cis woman". I'm just a woman. | |||
"I’m really into bi guys! Generally prefer then to straight men lol You're heterophobic love. Own it! "Hate the bastards | |||
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"I've tried it and just didn't find it in any way a turn on, which surprised me because I always thought I would. Slightly uncomfortable and not erotic in any way. So I suppose that may be a common reaction. I do get very turned on by performing and recieving oral, which I believe to be more popular than most men make out." Thanks for that | |||
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"Have found ‘straight’ guys on this to be more interested and comfortable engaging in bi activity than many self identified ‘bi curious’ or ‘bi’ guys. When we’ve gently talked this through the ‘straight’ guys have said they don’t disclose their orientation for the following reasons 1) they have straight mates on this who they don’t want to out themselves too. 2) they don’t consider acts they are engaging in as bi as there is a female in the room. 3) some females / couples on this don’t meet bi guys and they don’t want to limit themselves 4) when they do engage in bi activity it’s very easy to get meets even if you have straight on your profile. 5) they don’t want inundated with messages from gay guys Ladies who don’t meet bi guys - you could easily be meeting one under cover! We now ask are you straight or some variation on fab straight! " Only thing I'd add is if someone has bi on their profile you know what you're getting. On here I probably get more attention, more offers from "straight" guys. Some feel that if I wear lingerie, a dress then it's not really bi. Others are very up front that they have straight on their profile because many women won't meet bi guys. And, sorry to advise this ladies, but many of these "straight" guys are married. | |||
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"Have found ‘straight’ guys on this to be more interested and comfortable engaging in bi activity than many self identified ‘bi curious’ or ‘bi’ guys. When we’ve gently talked this through the ‘straight’ guys have said they don’t disclose their orientation for the following reasons 1) they have straight mates on this who they don’t want to out themselves too. 2) they don’t consider acts they are engaging in as bi as there is a female in the room. 3) some females / couples on this don’t meet bi guys and they don’t want to limit themselves 4) when they do engage in bi activity it’s very easy to get meets even if you have straight on your profile. 5) they don’t want inundated with messages from gay guys Ladies who don’t meet bi guys - you could easily be meeting one under cover! We now ask are you straight or some variation on fab straight! Only thing I'd add is if someone has bi on their profile you know what you're getting. On here I probably get more attention, more offers from "straight" guys. Some feel that if I wear lingerie, a dress then it's not really bi. Others are very up front that they have straight on their profile because many women won't meet bi guys. And, sorry to advise this ladies, but many of these "straight" guys are married. " And for that conundrum we have the single women who insist they won't meet married men....when very many do. I suppose we all have our secrets and our reasons for them. You either take folk at face value on here or you don't. Go mad otherwise. | |||
" Only thing I'd add is if someone has bi on their profile you know what you're getting. On here I probably get more attention, more offers from "straight" guys. Some feel that if I wear lingerie, a dress then it's not really bi. Others are very up front that they have straight on their profile because many women won't meet bi guys. And, sorry to advise this ladies, but many of these "straight" guys are married. " This is really accurate. We get messages on a daily basis from guys who say on their profile that they are straight. Their entire profile is pointed towards meeting women and yet they’re messaging us. It’s a safe bet that a lot of women on here have met a bi guy who claims to be straight at some point. So if they are turning a guy down for being bi, it’s just the knowledge that he’s bi which is the issue. Otherwise, they’re none the wiser. | |||
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"Nope sorry I don't meet bi guys. It clearly states in my profile that I don't meet them but they still chance a message to me. I met a bi guy some years ago and the outcome was not at all nice. So never again I'm afraid x" If your only reason for not meeting someone is due to them being bisexual then you’re biphobic. You’ve never had a negative experience with someone who isn’t bisexual? Not sure if I can buy into that. | |||
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"I’m actually disappointed by the amount of small minded and prejudiced people in this thread and obviously this site. I’d have thought that with it being a sex site, people would be a lot more free, open, accepting and a bit more smarter. Seems like that’s not the case though. "Big same. It actually seems to be a feature of the Scottish forum, most other sections seem more wholesome. It also seems to be a generational thing, at least partly. Glad that attitudes are changing though | |||
"Nope sorry I don't meet bi guys. It clearly states in my profile that I don't meet them but they still chance a message to me. I met a bi guy some years ago and the outcome was not at all nice. So never again I'm afraid x If your only reason for not meeting someone is due to them being bisexual then you’re biphobic. You’ve never had a negative experience with someone who isn’t bisexual? Not sure if I can buy into that." thing is.you don't need to 'buy into' anything that dosnt involve you.you do you | |||
"Nope sorry I don't meet bi guys. It clearly states in my profile that I don't meet them but they still chance a message to me. I met a bi guy some years ago and the outcome was not at all nice. So never again I'm afraid x If your only reason for not meeting someone is due to them being bisexual then you’re biphobic. You’ve never had a negative experience with someone who isn’t bisexual? Not sure if I can buy into that.thing is.you don't need to 'buy into' anything that dosnt involve you.you do you "I will do me babe. You’re past the point of saving xo | |||
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"It is some internalized stereotype, generalizations about any aspect of a person is. Frame it as a preference if you must but don’t lie to anyone, you’ve got a negative bias that’s generalizing people. " Spot on. | |||
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"Totally agree with the most bi guys go from bi to straight depending on who they message.thats why I use my wee note function for keeping track lol as their profiles change hourly "
Actually the ‘straight’ guys we have met don’t chop and change their orientation on their profiles. They disclose in chat or their behaviour at meets!
The reality is none of us know the full sexual histories or otherwise of other fab users.
Would have thought when joined there fab users would be enlightened bunch, or at least able to understand their own minds and prejudices. | |||
"Lol ffs because folk don't want to meet bi people it's came down to biphobic .. some of you harping on about it need to sit back and stop the pity party and realise people have choices.. they don't choose YOU " I think you’re completely missing the point. I’ll do my best to explain. Say you’re in a one on one scenario with a bisexual man - why would him being bisexual even be remotely relevant? He’s there with you and he’s bisexual so he likes women. He’s not gonna infect you with his bi-ness is he? Why the fuck is it relevant that he also might have some hot men in his DMs. Don’t be jealous hun, he’s there for you and he likes you. Jokes aside, I think people need to just be honest with themselves. You can hide behind the “it’s a preference” shield all you want, but there’s no fucking logic to it. As I said before, if your ONLY reason for not sleeping with someone is them being bisexual, then you are biphobic. It’s really that simple. So you might as well just admit that you’re prejudiced. Looks like you’re not alone as a disgusting amount of people in this thread seem to agree with you, so you can feel safe hun x | |||
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"I'm bi, I have no problem meeting bi guys lol so your explanation is irrelevant to me, but bi guys trying to push what others are comfortable doing just sounds like a pity party " I don't think anyone is trying to push what everyone else is comfortable doing. It's more about being honest as to *why* they are not comfortable doing it. | |||
"I'm bi, I have no problem meeting bi guys lol so your explanation is irrelevant to me, but bi guys trying to push what others are comfortable doing just sounds like a pity party I don't think anyone is trying to push what everyone else is comfortable doing. It's more about being honest as to *why* they are not comfortable doing it." the why is about their rights to choices, it's really that simple in some cases, obviously can't speak for everyone but some posters have gave you their reasons but it seems your not happy with it | |||
"There's no logic to it you say, but that's your opinion... Live and let live. Choices and preferences" What a fucking stellar philosophy you have there. Yeah let’s not challenge prejudices or discrimination because personal preferences yay! Live and let live! | |||
"I'm bi, I have no problem meeting bi guys lol so your explanation is irrelevant to me, but bi guys trying to push what others are comfortable doing just sounds like a pity party I don't think anyone is trying to push what everyone else is comfortable doing. It's more about being honest as to *why* they are not comfortable doing it. the why is about their rights to choices, it's really that simple in some cases, obviously can't speak for everyone but some posters have gave you their reasons but it seems your not happy with it" No one puts in doubt anyone else's right to say no, it's not about that. It's that the choices we make are influenced by the society and culture we live in, and the product of an homophobic society is (among other things) irrational fears regarding bi men. | |||
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"There's no logic to it you say, but that's your opinion... Live and let live. Choices and preferences What a fucking stellar philosophy you have there. Yeah let’s not challenge prejudices or discrimination because personal preferences yay! Live and let live! " thanks I thought it was brilliant too . Oh and zero fucks given | |||
"I'm bi, I have no problem meeting bi guys lol so your explanation is irrelevant to me, but bi guys trying to push what others are comfortable doing just sounds like a pity party I don't think anyone is trying to push what everyone else is comfortable doing. It's more about being honest as to *why* they are not comfortable doing it. the why is about their rights to choices, it's really that simple in some cases, obviously can't speak for everyone but some posters have gave you their reasons but it seems your not happy with it No one puts in doubt anyone else's right to say no, it's not about that. It's that the choices we make are influenced by the society and culture we live in, and the product of an homophobic society is (among other things) irrational fears regarding bi men." yea I agree to an extent but you or I can't speak for everyone, I'll not meet anyone under 6ft. Am I now dwarfphobic | |||
"I'm bi, I have no problem meeting bi guys lol so your explanation is irrelevant to me, but bi guys trying to push what others are comfortable doing just sounds like a pity party I don't think anyone is trying to push what everyone else is comfortable doing. It's more about being honest as to *why* they are not comfortable doing it. the why is about their rights to choices, it's really that simple in some cases, obviously can't speak for everyone but some posters have gave you their reasons but it seems your not happy with it No one puts in doubt anyone else's right to say no, it's not about that. It's that the choices we make are influenced by the society and culture we live in, and the product of an homophobic society is (among other things) irrational fears regarding bi men. yea I agree to an extent but you or I can't speak for everyone, I'll not meet anyone under 6ft. Am I now dwarfphobic "No, just terribly disingenuous. | |||
"I'm bi, I have no problem meeting bi guys lol so your explanation is irrelevant to me, but bi guys trying to push what others are comfortable doing just sounds like a pity party I don't think anyone is trying to push what everyone else is comfortable doing. It's more about being honest as to *why* they are not comfortable doing it. the why is about their rights to choices, it's really that simple in some cases, obviously can't speak for everyone but some posters have gave you their reasons but it seems your not happy with it No one puts in doubt anyone else's right to say no, it's not about that. It's that the choices we make are influenced by the society and culture we live in, and the product of an homophobic society is (among other things) irrational fears regarding bi men. yea I agree to an extent but you or I can't speak for everyone, I'll not meet anyone under 6ft. Am I now dwarfphobic
No, just terribly disingenuous."next you'll be telling me "we're all the same lying down" lol | |||
"I'm bi, I have no problem meeting bi guys lol so your explanation is irrelevant to me, but bi guys trying to push what others are comfortable doing just sounds like a pity party I don't think anyone is trying to push what everyone else is comfortable doing. It's more about being honest as to *why* they are not comfortable doing it. the why is about their rights to choices, it's really that simple in some cases, obviously can't speak for everyone but some posters have gave you their reasons but it seems your not happy with it No one puts in doubt anyone else's right to say no, it's not about that. It's that the choices we make are influenced by the society and culture we live in, and the product of an homophobic society is (among other things) irrational fears regarding bi men. yea I agree to an extent but you or I can't speak for everyone, I'll not meet anyone under 6ft. Am I now dwarfphobic
No, just terribly disingenuous."Because you THINK something doesn't automatically make it right, let people make their own choices without complaining why it's not you, you'll be so much happier | |||
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"I'm bi, I have no problem meeting bi guys lol so your explanation is irrelevant to me, but bi guys trying to push what others are comfortable doing just sounds like a pity party I don't think anyone is trying to push what everyone else is comfortable doing. It's more about being honest as to *why* they are not comfortable doing it. the why is about their rights to choices, it's really that simple in some cases, obviously can't speak for everyone but some posters have gave you their reasons but it seems your not happy with it No one puts in doubt anyone else's right to say no, it's not about that. It's that the choices we make are influenced by the society and culture we live in, and the product of an homophobic society is (among other things) irrational fears regarding bi men. yea I agree to an extent but you or I can't speak for everyone, I'll not meet anyone under 6ft. Am I now dwarfphobic
No, just terribly disingenuous. Because you THINK something doesn't automatically make it right, let people make their own choices without complaining why it's not you, you'll be so much happier"This isn't about me in the first place, I'm not a bi man. I do have some basic empathy and capacity for introspection though. Your attempts to dismiss everything with "freedom of choice, preferences" is an oversimplification and terribly boring and unoriginal. Try to engage in deeper thoughts. | |||
"I'm bi, I have no problem meeting bi guys lol so your explanation is irrelevant to me, but bi guys trying to push what others are comfortable doing just sounds like a pity party I don't think anyone is trying to push what everyone else is comfortable doing. It's more about being honest as to *why* they are not comfortable doing it. the why is about their rights to choices, it's really that simple in some cases, obviously can't speak for everyone but some posters have gave you their reasons but it seems your not happy with it No one puts in doubt anyone else's right to say no, it's not about that. It's that the choices we make are influenced by the society and culture we live in, and the product of an homophobic society is (among other things) irrational fears regarding bi men. yea I agree to an extent but you or I can't speak for everyone, I'll not meet anyone under 6ft. Am I now dwarfphobic
No, just terribly disingenuous. Because you THINK something doesn't automatically make it right, let people make their own choices without complaining why it's not you, you'll be so much happier
This isn't about me in the first place, I'm not a bi man. I do have some basic empathy and capacity for introspection though. Your attempts to dismiss everything with "freedom of choice, preferences" is an oversimplification and terribly boring and unoriginal. Try to engage in deeper thoughts."I don't need to engage in anything, all about choices | |||
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"This is all very educational. I'm still hoping to be a bit more smarter, though. With that in mind; is it more acceptable to discriminate or show prejudice towards a someone's religious or political orientation than it is their sexual orientation?" Dunno Is it? | |||
"This is all very educational. I'm still hoping to be a bit more smarter, though. With that in mind; is it more acceptable to discriminate or show prejudice towards a someone's religious or political orientation than it is their sexual orientation?" If you are referring to me saying that I won't sleep with tories and TERFs, I consider that self-care, I do like pain but sleeping with people who seek to make my life hell is a bit too much | |||
"This is all very educational. I'm still hoping to be a bit more smarter, though. With that in mind; is it more acceptable to discriminate or show prejudice towards a someone's religious or political orientation than it is their sexual orientation?" I’d imagine it would have something to do with the cultural and socio-political history of oppression linked to the grouping… If someone had a preference to avoid a Irish Catholics on this it would immediately be picked up for what it is. I think preferences / prejudices can be unpacked. Maybe some thinking on stereotypes of bi-men being more promiscuous, linked to HIV/AIDs transmission to straight community, cheating, or dare I say more skilled than some females at pleasing a male can come into play here. I mean these views are nonsense but I wonder if they are in play here. | |||
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"This is all very educational. I'm still hoping to be a bit more smarter, though. With that in mind; is it more acceptable to discriminate or show prejudice towards a someone's religious or political orientation than it is their sexual orientation? If you are referring to me saying that I won't sleep with tories and TERFs, I consider that self-care, I do like pain but sleeping with people who seek to make my life hell is a bit too much "No-one in particular - just a general observation. I'm happy to let people sleep with whomever they choose without dissection and labelling. I've actually the same issue with bisexual men, straight men, bisexual women and gay women - they make my life hell by consuming the women of Fab. Mon the gay guys! NB. Apologies to any relevant orientation I missed from my list. I'm a bit old school. | |||
"This is all very educational. I'm still hoping to be a bit more smarter, though. With that in mind; is it more acceptable to discriminate or show prejudice towards a someone's religious or political orientation than it is their sexual orientation? If you are referring to me saying that I won't sleep with tories and TERFs, I consider that self-care, I do like pain but sleeping with people who seek to make my life hell is a bit too much "Ooowa anti conservative party ...shocking | |||
"I will say that this is such a difficult topic. As a single man on here it is difficult enough to engage with other profiles. I choose not to display my true sexuality (bisexual) because of the fear of someone recognising me and outting me. For a man it's very different from a woman. I know lots of woman who are bi and its accepted and they can flit between different relationships and even settle down and marry. A man is probably turned on knowing his wife is bi. But the same cannot be said for woman. I know literally no one who is openly bi and moves between relationships only to settle down with a woman. We would get labelled as gay and that is not the case. So now I face the problem of having to convince couples who are looking for a bi meet that I am genuinely bi. It's all a bit of a head fuck at times. But the important part is I'm not attracted to u _ased on ur gender or ur sexuality. I'm attracted to u _ased on ur personality and looks. And if I am 1 on 1 with a woman I will give u all of my attention, the same if it's a man, and if it's a couple I will respect u both equally." Thanks for bringing to the table your much needed perspective | |||
"This is all very educational. I'm still hoping to be a bit more smarter, though. With that in mind; is it more acceptable to discriminate or show prejudice towards a someone's religious or political orientation than it is their sexual orientation? If you are referring to me saying that I won't sleep with tories and TERFs, I consider that self-care, I do like pain but sleeping with people who seek to make my life hell is a bit too much
Ooowa anti conservative party ...shocking "I mean, I live in Glasgow and I'm trans, isn't that like, obvious? I settle for the green party because there is no one else to their left | |||
"This is all very educational. I'm still hoping to be a bit more smarter, though. With that in mind; is it more acceptable to discriminate or show prejudice towards a someone's religious or political orientation than it is their sexual orientation? If you are referring to me saying that I won't sleep with tories and TERFs, I consider that self-care, I do like pain but sleeping with people who seek to make my life hell is a bit too much
Ooowa anti conservative party ...shocking
I mean, I live in Glasgow and I'm trans, isn't that like, obvious? I settle for the green party because there is no one else to their left " | |||
"I will say that this is such a difficult topic. As a single man on here it is difficult enough to engage with other profiles. I choose not to display my true sexuality (bisexual) because of the fear of someone recognising me and outting me. For a man it's very different from a woman. I know lots of woman who are bi and its accepted and they can flit between different relationships and even settle down and marry. A man is probably turned on knowing his wife is bi. But the same cannot be said for woman. I know literally no one who is openly bi and moves between relationships only to settle down with a woman. We would get labelled as gay and that is not the case. So now I face the problem of having to convince couples who are looking for a bi meet that I am genuinely bi. It's all a bit of a head fuck at times. But the important part is I'm not attracted to u _ased on ur gender or ur sexuality. I'm attracted to u _ased on ur personality and looks. And if I am 1 on 1 with a woman I will give u all of my attention, the same if it's a man, and if it's a couple I will respect u both equally." Thank you so much for sharing all of that x | |||
Folk judging for judging lol that's laughable
I'm away to look through my messages to see what bi guys are straight today. | |||
"Christ almighty!! Some folks lacey knickers are getting in a twist
Folk judging for judging lol that's laughable
I'm away to look through my messages to see what bi guys are straight today."That's blasphemous! You're beyond saving! | |||
But hey that's OK.. someone worth saving will be along shortly no doubt | |||
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"So... this has gone about as well as you would expect. I always think it's a shame when someone says "No bi guys" on their profile. On the other hand, it's a helpful sign - it makes it easy to immediately put their profile in the bin "Very much this. Nice pics btw | |||
"So... this has gone about as well as you would expect. I always think it's a shame when someone says "No bi guys" on their profile. On the other hand, it's a helpful sign - it makes it easy to immediately put their profile in the bin
Very much this. Nice pics btw"You too | |||
"Nope sorry I don't meet bi guys. It clearly states in my profile that I don't meet them but they still chance a message to me. I met a bi guy some years ago and the outcome was not at all nice. So never again I'm afraid x" What you mean is you've never met anyone who stated he was bi, which is a very different thing. | |||
Have fun and stay safe | |||
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"But in the back if your mind your thinking? But no one else can have thoughts in the back of their minds it seems. Weird." The difference is that in my case I fear that I might get attacked and hurt. But go on | |||
"I will say that this is such a difficult topic. As a single man on here it is difficult enough to engage with other profiles. I choose not to display my true sexuality (bisexual) because of the fear of someone recognising me and outting me. For a man it's very different from a woman. I know lots of woman who are bi and its accepted and they can flit between different relationships and even settle down and marry. A man is probably turned on knowing his wife is bi. But the same cannot be said for woman. I know literally no one who is openly bi and moves between relationships only to settle down with a woman. We would get labelled as gay and that is not the case. So now I face the problem of having to convince couples who are looking for a bi meet that I am genuinely bi. It's all a bit of a head fuck at times. But the important part is I'm not attracted to u _ased on ur gender or ur sexuality. I'm attracted to u _ased on ur personality and looks. And if I am 1 on 1 with a woman I will give u all of my attention, the same if it's a man, and if it's a couple I will respect u both equally." The issue of bi guys meeting on here aside, I get and agree with what you're saying about bi women & men being viewed differently. Dunno if it's just down to men and women being wired differently so guys see almost any sexually confident female partaking in anything a bit "different" as hot, whereas women are maybe more black and white. Only a handful of people in real life know I like women. It's nothing to do with shame or fear of being outed. I don't really talk about what Mr and I get up to in the bedroom so see no need to declare to the world that I occasionally like to lick fanny. It's my business. I'll reiterate an earlier point. Any number of factors could put me off someone who I initially found attractive. A behaviour, a mannerism...I've seen pics on here of people who I initially thought were hit AF then looked at their profile to discover they were into all sorts of stuff that made me go "eurgh". Doesn't mean I think any less of them as a person, just wouldn't consider them as a potential sexual partner. So I suppose I can add "fussy cunt" to the ever growing list of names I've been called in recent weeks. And I'm perfectly comfortable with that. | |||
"But in the back if your mind your thinking? But no one else can have thoughts in the back of their minds it seems. Weird. The difference is that in my case I fear that I might get attacked and hurt. But go on "no not having a pop honestly was just saying everyone's thoughts are different no on can have a pop at anyone's own individual thoughts or preferences. | |||
Didn't expect this to blow up as much as it did.
And I'm amazed at how the responses have mostly be erudite, well presented and respectful which on the Internet... Well done!
Im mostly surprised at how a lively discussion can erupt from whats basically a bisexual guys crisis of confidence postover the fact he's not getting laid lol
Jokes aside, thanks for the replies beautiful people | |||
"Woah.
Didn't expect this to blow up as much as it did.
And I'm amazed at how the responses have mostly be erudite, well presented and respectful which on the Internet... Well done!
Im mostly surprised at how a lively discussion can erupt from whats basically a bisexual guys crisis of confidence postover the fact he's not getting laid lol
Jokes aside, thanks for the replies beautiful people "Hopefully you get pumped soon | |||
haha here's hoping | |||
"Il answer that as a female that dosnt want to have sex with bi males. Because I don't want to.it really is that simple. No clue why it ruffles so many feathers..I'm not slim Do I moan about guys only wanting to meet slim birds.no.concentrate on those that are looking to meet bi guys rather than trying to call out those who don't. Everyone gets some in the long run. "What if you have sex with a guy who doesn't say he's bi, but is, and has had sex with men? You might already have done. You would be none the wiser. | |||
"Il answer that as a female that dosnt want to have sex with bi males. Because I don't want to.it really is that simple. No clue why it ruffles so many feathers..I'm not slim Do I moan about guys only wanting to meet slim birds.no.concentrate on those that are looking to meet bi guys rather than trying to call out those who don't. Everyone gets some in the long run.
What if you have sex with a guy who doesn't say he's bi, but is, and has had sex with men? You might already have done. You would be none the wiser."Good point. Is there a Kinsey scale version of a gaydar on the market for such instances? | |||
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"I love a bi guy, so many more combination options "I think I like you...! | |||
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"I think bi guys definitely do get a hard time on here. I considered listing myself as straight just so I wouldn’t be immediately written off by certain folks, but felt it would be better to be honest about. I wouldn’t fancy meeting anyone who didn’t like bi guys anyway! " Just be you, man. It’s baffling. If you tell a girl you’re straight and she wants to have sex with you, great! If you tell that same girl you’re bisexual and she rejects you for it, that’s her own internalised issues. The sex would be the same in both situations. The only difference is knowing your sexuality which literally makes no difference when you’re together 1 on 1. You don’t wanna hook up with those kind of people anyways when there are plenty of girls out there who are fine with bi guys. We’ve done well on here and get messages every day from women who like bi guys. I’d rather have their attention than have to hide who we are for the attention of someone more narrow minded. | |||
"I think bi guys definitely do get a hard time on here. I considered listing myself as straight just so I wouldn’t be immediately written off by certain folks, but felt it would be better to be honest about. I wouldn’t fancy meeting anyone who didn’t like bi guys anyway! Just be you, man. It’s baffling. If you tell a girl you’re straight and she wants to have sex with you, great! If you tell that same girl you’re bisexual and she rejects you for it, that’s her own internalised issues. The sex would be the same in both situations. The only difference is knowing your sexuality which literally makes no difference when you’re together 1 on 1. You don’t wanna hook up with those kind of people anyways when there are plenty of girls out there who are fine with bi guys. We’ve done well on here and get messages every day from women who like bi guys. I’d rather have their attention than have to hide who we are for the attention of someone more narrow minded." Well said guys. | |||
"I think bi guys definitely do get a hard time on here. I considered listing myself as straight just so I wouldn’t be immediately written off by certain folks, but felt it would be better to be honest about. I wouldn’t fancy meeting anyone who didn’t like bi guys anyway! Just be you, man. It’s baffling. If you tell a girl you’re straight and she wants to have sex with you, great! If you tell that same girl you’re bisexual and she rejects you for it, that’s her own internalised issues. The sex would be the same in both situations. The only difference is knowing your sexuality which literally makes no difference when you’re together 1 on 1. You don’t wanna hook up with those kind of people anyways when there are plenty of girls out there who are fine with bi guys. We’ve done well on here and get messages every day from women who like bi guys. I’d rather have their attention than have to hide who we are for the attention of someone more narrow minded." This is absolutely spot on and great advice x | |||
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"I don't see why anyone needs to justify their sexual preferences to anybody on here. Isn't this "preference shaming"? I fail to see how I'm being prejudiced against someone if I chose not to let them penetrate me but otherwise treat them the same as every other individual I interact with. " I don’t think anyone is being asked to justify. Being asked to explain where they are coming from is a bit different. What it’s worth I think most people in this thread so far have treaded very carefully and handled the topic pretty well. At the end of the day, prejudice or not, preference is preference. Anyone is free to, and can, choose who to sleep with for whatever reason. And it could just be cause that’s what they like. I mean there are a lot of different people I wouldn’t sleep with. Some cause I don’t like their personality, others cause I don’t find them attractive … At the end of the day life is for living and each person should live their best life. Just because you don’t want to sleep with someone doesn’t make you prejudiced against them. Telling them they can’t join your social group because of their sexual orientation is something totally different (not that’s I’m saying you or anyone here would do that). Personally I avoid meeting “straight” guys on here… why the hell would a straight guy wanna meet another single guy right …. But it happens. A lot. where they message and they don’t list bi because of the whole “some women won’t sleep with them if they do“ so I see the validity in the original post question .. And in the interests of clarity I don’t meet them cause I view it as lying, and if they lie about one thing, maybe they lying about other things too. | |||
"I don't see why anyone needs to justify their sexual preferences to anybody on here. Isn't this "preference shaming"? I fail to see how I'm being prejudiced against someone if I chose not to let them penetrate me but otherwise treat them the same as every other individual I interact with. I don’t think anyone is being asked to justify. Being asked to explain where they are coming from is a bit different. What it’s worth I think most people in this thread so far have treaded very carefully and handled the topic pretty well. At the end of the day, prejudice or not, preference is preference. Anyone is free to, and can, choose who to sleep with for whatever reason. And it could just be cause that’s what they like. I mean there are a lot of different people I wouldn’t sleep with. Some cause I don’t like their personality, others cause I don’t find them attractive … At the end of the day life is for living and each person should live their best life. Just because you don’t want to sleep with someone doesn’t make you prejudiced against them. Telling them they can’t join your social group because of their sexual orientation is something totally different (not that’s I’m saying you or anyone here would do that). Personally I avoid meeting “straight” guys on here… why the hell would a straight guy wanna meet another single guy right …. But it happens. A lot. where they message and they don’t list bi because of the whole “some women won’t sleep with them if they do“ so I see the validity in the original post question .. And in the interests of clarity I don’t meet them cause I view it as lying, and if they lie about one thing, maybe they lying about other things too. " | |||
"Nope sorry I don't meet bi guys. It clearly states in my profile that I don't meet them but they still chance a message to me. I met a bi guy some years ago and the outcome was not at all nice. So never again I'm afraid x What you mean is you've never met anyone who stated he was bi, which is a very different thing. " No I said a met bi guy. If you read my message you would have realised that I already knew he was bi or I would have said otherwise | |||
"Woah.
Didn't expect this to blow up as much as it did.
And I'm amazed at how the responses have mostly be erudite, well presented and respectful which on the Internet... Well done!
Im mostly surprised at how a lively discussion can erupt from whats basically a bisexual guys crisis of confidence postover the fact he's not getting laid lol
Jokes aside, thanks for the replies beautiful people "Thanks for wrapping it up so nicely xx | |||
"I don't see why anyone needs to justify their sexual preferences to anybody on here. Isn't this "preference shaming"? I fail to see how I'm being prejudiced against someone if I chose not to let them penetrate me but otherwise treat them the same as every other individual I interact with. I don’t think anyone is being asked to justify. Being asked to explain where they are coming from is a bit different. What it’s worth I think most people in this thread so far have treaded very carefully and handled the topic pretty well. At the end of the day, prejudice or not, preference is preference. Anyone is free to, and can, choose who to sleep with for whatever reason. And it could just be cause that’s what they like. I mean there are a lot of different people I wouldn’t sleep with. Some cause I don’t like their personality, others cause I don’t find them attractive … At the end of the day life is for living and each person should live their best life. Just because you don’t want to sleep with someone doesn’t make you prejudiced against them. Telling them they can’t join your social group because of their sexual orientation is something totally different (not that’s I’m saying you or anyone here would do that). Personally I avoid meeting “straight” guys on here… why the hell would a straight guy wanna meet another single guy right …. But it happens. A lot. where they message and they don’t list bi because of the whole “some women won’t sleep with them if they do“ so I see the validity in the original post question .. And in the interests of clarity I don’t meet them cause I view it as lying, and if they lie about one thing, maybe they lying about other things too. "Amen  | |||
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"I will say that this is such a difficult topic. As a single man on here it is difficult enough to engage with other profiles. I choose not to display my true sexuality (bisexual) because of the fear of someone recognising me and outting me. For a man it's very different from a woman. I know lots of woman who are bi and its accepted and they can flit between different relationships and even settle down and marry. A man is probably turned on knowing his wife is bi. But the same cannot be said for woman. I know literally no one who is openly bi and moves between relationships only to settle down with a woman. We would get labelled as gay and that is not the case. So now I face the problem of having to convince couples who are looking for a bi meet that I am genuinely bi. It's all a bit of a head fuck at times. But the important part is I'm not attracted to u _ased on ur gender or ur sexuality. I'm attracted to u _ased on ur personality and looks. And if I am 1 on 1 with a woman I will give u all of my attention, the same if it's a man, and if it's a couple I will respect u both equally. The issue of bi guys meeting on here aside, I get and agree with what you're saying about bi women & men being viewed differently. Dunno if it's just down to men and women being wired differently so guys see almost any sexually confident female partaking in anything a bit "different" as hot, whereas women are maybe more black and white. Only a handful of people in real life know I like women. It's nothing to do with shame or fear of being outed. I don't really talk about what Mr and I get up to in the bedroom so see no need to declare to the world that I occasionally like to lick fanny. It's my business. I'll reiterate an earlier point. Any number of factors could put me off someone who I initially found attractive. A behaviour, a mannerism...I've seen pics on here of people who I initially thought were hit AF then looked at their profile to discover they were into all sorts of stuff that made me go "eurgh". Doesn't mean I think any less of them as a person, just wouldn't consider them as a potential sexual partner. So I suppose I can add "fussy cunt" to the ever growing list of names I've been called in recent weeks. And I'm perfectly comfortable with that. " | |||
"This Thread is now Finished "There's a similar one in The Lounge just now. | |||
"This Thread is now Finished "It's no finished
Good one though | |||
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"When we were on this site 10yrs ago there wasn't that many bi guys but it seams to be more acceptable now and see a lot more these days. I do agree that bi guys do have it tough as we have read quite a few profiles stating no bi or bi curious." A very balanced discussion on this in The Lounge, go have a wee nosey | |||
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"Jesus, five comments in and the word phobia is used to disrepect and demean a persons sexual preference. I'm not seeing much tolerence here. It seems socially unacceptable to have preferences these days. Let people be who they are, want what they want and enjoy who they want. If someone has a preference you don't like, it's not an invitation to tell them they need educated, they are phobic or to disrepect them. This is fab, a place where anyone can find pretty much anything to suit their very individual and personal sexual preferences. Be nice or leave people alone to enjoy the site «Mic drop, goes home" | |||
"Very good podcast about it! Sharing is Caring: S1E24 - Bi Visibility Day 2020 - Bisexuality in the lifestyle http://sharingiscaringpodcast.com/episode/4afdc9f40cdf47f3/bi-visibility-day-2020-bisexuality-in-the-lifestyle" Thanks for the recommendation just added that to the already massive list of podcasts in my player!
I wrote a piece for my work’s lgbt group for bi visibility day last year. Not wanting to continue the ‘pity party’ as the usual suspects have called it, but biphobia is one of those insidious and pernicious issues. There are often attacks from the ‘gay side’ with insinuations that it’s a “gay light” phase (or a stopover on the way to gay town, as Carrie so infamously said). From the other side we’re slutty, we’re indecisive and as was already mentioned… we’re disease vectors.
There are some (a vocal minority, thankfully) now who are open about not wanting bisexuals in “Lesbian and Gay” spaces (bars, etc.). This is the natural next phase of the anti-queer culture war. Trans folk are the current target. Then it’s bisexuality in the stand.
The visibility is important too. Most people don’t realise how many bisexuals (in particular bi men) they know.
We are schroedinger’s queers.
You see us in a ‘straight’ relationship, we’re read as straight. You see us in a ‘gay’ relationship we’re read as gay. Because of the hostility from all around, there’s little incentive to be out.
Visibility is difficult though, without coming out every five minute. There are only so many ways to drop into conversation about the guys you fancy without starting to sound a bit… obsessed!
I finally (decades late) got round to telling my parents. My mum took it best but assumed this was a precursor to divorce. My dad was just confused as to what it meant and why it mattered to tell them after years of marriage. While a further explanation about the nature might have cleared that aspect up, I suspect the cure would be worse than the ‘disease’ of their confusion!
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"I would recommend listening to that podcast, it's really good, it's personal and honest" I will | |||
"I never knew biphobia was even a thing?! Probably because I'm not in any venues or know others who would care if someone was bi or not. But wow, it sounds like its quite a big issue in some areas. I'm interested to know more on this so I'll look at the info. "Thanks. It is a thing, but it is a thing that hides away in a corner. On here it’s easy to dismiss as people who are annoyed because someone won’t sleep with them. It’s really not that though. It’s that the reason, the blanket “no, I’m dismissing that type of person”, is the tip of a very large iceberg. As others have said, no one is suggesting that if a person doesn’t want to sleep with an Asian person that they should be made to. What that person should do consider is upon what they’re basing their ’preference’. What initially gets described as simply a preference almost always has a root in either a negative experience, assumption or expectation. The concept of straight privilege (or white, cis, able-bodied, male, neurotypical, etc.) is part of it, but is often misunderstood. The idea of privilege isn’t to suggest that people who are straight have a charmed life free from strife… rather it’s that they have enjoyed being free from that particular strand of discrimination - they’ve never had to worry about all of the above. But rights and privilege aren’t like pie. There are enough rights to go round, and the concept of privilege overlaps. I’m white european, male, cis, middle class (or not in poverty, at least). I am negatively impacted with biphobia, and have been fearful of attack on the basis of the person with whom I share a public display of affection. I’ve never directly experienced racism (my ex wife did, and even being subject to it by association was truly vile), and don’t live in fear of that. I’ve never suffered misogyny or risked transphobic violence. In those ways I need to be aware of my privilege and how it affects my thoughts, words and actions. Privilege is closely related to un-knowing (had to edit word due to forum filter!) bias. The fact that I don’t know what it is like to be the direct victim of racism means my thought processes on that issue will be different to someone who has or might. The fact that I grew up in a white family, in an overwhelmingly white area means my exposure to and understanding of it people who are not white is impacted. That doesn’t mean I am racist, but it does mean I need to be mindful of the risk of this bias impacting my thoughts and decisions (even in a well intentioned way). Being aware of it is the best tool against it, but no one is perfect and we learn every day | |||
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"I've only recently discovered I'm bi. Thought I was gay. So I've not had to experience it yet." Well, I'm sure this thread filled you with optimism! Go get em tiger! | |||
"I've only recently discovered I'm bi. Thought I was gay. So I've not had to experience it yet." Congrats on the discovery! | |||
"I've only recently discovered I'm bi. Thought I was gay. So I've not had to experience it yet." How did you discover it? | |||
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"I've only recently discovered I'm bi. Thought I was gay. So I've not had to experience it yet. Congrats on the discovery! "Thanks. All still quite new to me. | |||
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"I've only recently discovered I'm bi. Thought I was gay. So I've not had to experience it yet. How did you discover it? " Randomly got turned on watching straight porn. | |||
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"I've only recently discovered I'm bi. Thought I was gay. So I've not had to experience it yet. How did you discover it? Randomly got turned on watching straight porn. " This actually made me lol....brilliant.
What a crazy bunch we are | |||
"I've only recently discovered I'm bi. Thought I was gay. So I've not had to experience it yet. How did you discover it? Randomly got turned on watching straight porn. This actually made me lol....brilliant.
What a crazy bunch we are "Indeed lol | |||
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^^^ this!
But each to their own! I did have a potential point but don't want to stir the pot anymore than it has been and ruin a fairly lovely wrap up to this thread! | |||
