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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So you are messaging back and forth, one from you, one from them and so on and so on, then you realise that you are always first to message, so do you wait to hear back from them, and then continue chatting, could it be they are just being pleasant, and if you don't message back, then thats it deed  , people often say , well how would you chat with someone in the flesh, well certainly not like that's i say something, you answer back, and that's it, you would just sit and chat away regardless, I've waffled on so long ive forgot my point, Thoughts, BTW, this is just an observation, nothing to do with anyone on here, in fact probably more relevant to a few people on FB . I can see my friends list getting smaller  |
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By *igGs19Woman
over a year ago
Castle Douglas |
Two trains of thought:
1 - "watering dead plants", that if you stop being the first to message, you might not hear from them again. You were there for their convenience when they needed, but not them for you. They don't check in on you, etc. Possible.
2 - life exists. The reality that people have jobs, weans, are stressed out their mind, don't have time to think about themselves nevermind anyone else, and the scary reality for them that their mates might just dump them in the midst of a rough patch and when things settle they'll be on their own.
Both extremes, both possible. I've been both the dead plant waterer and the person too stressed in my own box to remember to peek out and speak to anyone else. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Two trains of thought:
1 - "watering dead plants", that if you stop being the first to message, you might not hear from them again. You were there for their convenience when they needed, but not them for you. They don't check in on you, etc. Possible.
2 - life exists. The reality that people have jobs, weans, are stressed out their mind, don't have time to think about themselves nevermind anyone else, and the scary reality for them that their mates might just dump them in the midst of a rough patch and when things settle they'll be on their own.
Both extremes, both possible. I've been both the dead plant waterer and the person too stressed in my own box to remember to peek out and speak to anyone else."
Yeah absolutely two possible outcomes, tho your second one was saying people are busy and stuff, i totally get that, my point was more to do with, Tit for Tat messages   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm speaking for my Mrs here, as its her who does most of the messaging. Unless/until she feels some sort of connection, due to the amount of messages she gets, it's unlikely she'll message first. Flip side to that, if she's replied at all, it means she is at least interested. |
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Think we have all been there with one way conversations.
I'd say if it's not working give up.
No point in pursuing someone who always expects you to do all the running, its got to be equal interest to keep it interesting |
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If messaging back and forth if I reply and it's not answered I dont send another,
if we were actually discussing arranging a meet and they dont reply then that's their arse out the window. When they open a new message in the future I either just dingy it or tell them to GTF  |
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