FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > FWB - the struggle is real!
FWB - the struggle is real!
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"Are most guys just looking for a one and done? Seem to be struggling to find anyone genuine who wants a bit more than that..."
No not at all. Looking for more than that, some kind of connection and genuine feeling that we both want to see each other regularly. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"One and done not my style. Prefer a regular thing. Agree though trying to find something is tough"
Finding someone is really tricky! To the point it’s putting me off fab a bit! |
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"Are most guys just looking for a one and done? Seem to be struggling to find anyone genuine who wants a bit more than that..."
The more regular the better! If I want something disposable then I'll get a condom! |
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"Are most guys just looking for a one and done? Seem to be struggling to find anyone genuine who wants a bit more than that..."
To be fair you only joined a short time ago, we are in the middle of a pandemic so very few people meeting now than before
However I do agree its difficult finding one who wants something regular.
its the nature of the site for many who just want to meet as many people as possible therefore leaving less time for regular meets  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are most guys just looking for a one and done? Seem to be struggling to find anyone genuine who wants a bit more than that..."
Definitely a few of us guys on here who value the social side and connection of a fwb. Know what you mean though, seems there a lot of pushy and demanding guys on here. Us genuine ones are out there and feeling your pain too.
Happy to chat and meet socially with any ladies or couples looking for a single guy for semi-regular fun. |
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"Are most guys just looking for a one and done? Seem to be struggling to find anyone genuine who wants a bit more than that..."
stand by for the incoming I'm such a great guy and that's exactly what I'm looking for must be so annoying for you dealing with all the idiots on here but worry not I'm exactly what you seek type messages.
My advice take your time and out the morons if every tenth message is so when we meeting they probably wish to use you like a teenage boy uses curtain (fire and forget)  |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
For me FWB's is a no as I feel the lines can easily get blurred and someone ends up getting hurt.
Obviously you have to have clear boundaries to make it work but I'm not sure I could separate myself like that if I was spending a lot of 'non sex' time together.
I'd rather have an awesome friend that I can be open with and talk about this part of my life etc than risk losing them due to emotions getting involved. I've definitely been burned before with this so possibly puts me off  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having someone you see regularly us great, you find a rhythm with them and what they're into and can do alot of exploring.
One and dones are not great as its hit or miss and can feel rushed. Best to work things out slowly and enjoy it! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"For me FWB's is a no as I feel the lines can easily get blurred and someone ends up getting hurt.
Obviously you have to have clear boundaries to make it work but I'm not sure I could separate myself like that if I was spending a lot of 'non sex' time together.
I'd rather have an awesome friend that I can be open with and talk about this part of my life etc than risk losing them due to emotions getting involved. I've definitely been burned before with this so possibly puts me off "
Yeah I suppose I can understand that. It’s just that I have a fiancé and I’m quite good at separating things. I just don’t like the whole ‘one and done’ thing. Never think the sex is as good. |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
"For me FWB's is a no as I feel the lines can easily get blurred and someone ends up getting hurt.
Obviously you have to have clear boundaries to make it work but I'm not sure I could separate myself like that if I was spending a lot of 'non sex' time together.
I'd rather have an awesome friend that I can be open with and talk about this part of my life etc than risk losing them due to emotions getting involved. I've definitely been burned before with this so possibly puts me off
Yeah I suppose I can understand that. It’s just that I have a fiancé and I’m quite good at separating things. I just don’t like the whole ‘one and done’ thing. Never think the sex is as good."
I 100% agree with you there. I definitely need to get to know someone a bit for the sex to be really good. I think its a very fine balance which when achieved must be amazing but I'm unlikely to find.
I'd rather find a partner that I feel safe with and enjoy all the relationship side has to offer and still have Fab fun and explore things together too. Pipe dream possibly |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
"FWBs work until one of the parties decide to move on.  "
This is very true and probably the reason it wouldn't work for me as I would always be waiting for them to say they've found better and would never truly open up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are most guys just looking for a one and done? Seem to be struggling to find anyone genuine who wants a bit more than that..."
Im looking for the same and I will come back for more and more  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"FWBs work until one of the parties decide to move on.
This is very true and probably the reason it wouldn't work for me as I would always be waiting for them to say they've found better and would never truly open up "
 "them" but how would they feel if you were looking?  |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
"FWBs work until one of the parties decide to move on.
This is very true and probably the reason it wouldn't work for me as I would always be waiting for them to say they've found better and would never truly open up
"them" but how would they feel if you were looking? "
Hence the reason I'm perfectly clear about not wanting FWB's at all. It works for some people and fits in perfect with their life.
I just know I want something more |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Over the years I’ve managed to have a few fwb generally have more than one on the go at a time and keep going back to the same guys over the years tbh most folk say they want more regular fun but can’t seem to distinguish between what they really want ! Someone they get on with for regular fun or someone who’s perfect ! But they don’t want a relationship 
Then there’s the ones who think the grass is always greener and those who have extremely high opinions of themselves. Just have fun and don’t be out off looking for the exclusive fwb or you may overlook some fun times |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The problem is there are alot o guys and girls that are either a panda or a hump and a dump. Which we all get targeted with the same brush, it is hard to meet either a regular playmate or a fb, even a fwb for social and clubs or regular fun |
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"Are most guys just looking for a one and done? Seem to be struggling to find anyone genuine who wants a bit more than that..."
Diffrent people,diffrent things as priorities.
By that i mean,its many and varied what ideas/plans people have,some couples get a buzz from meeting someone diffrent each time they decide they want to meet, some i'm sure click with certain people and that suits them way better than hours and hours of browsing/messaging on here.
Been lucky enough to of met people that opted to meet a few times, done simple, out for drinks with women i came to know, coffee and catchin up, edinburgh festival night out, gig in glasgow.
All that without ever hinting at or specifying,"lookin for fwb",because its just not me, my style.
I dont think any guy floats off because he thinks the grass is greener either, i think there are either guys that really busy themselves on here or there are guys that sit n hope the fun comes to them. |
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I've had a few in the past, works well for me because of my other commitments.
usually ends because they want more than I can give so they go off to find a GF.
to be able to achieve this properly both of you need to know exactly where the line tows and be able to control your own emotions & have the capacity to call it if it gets too much for one or the other.
Honesty and trust is just as important in this scenario.
I am grateful to have found one, however i found him outside of Fab...maybe in time I'll introduce him since it seems to be an interest of his anyway....BONUS!!  |
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By *iimonMan
over a year ago
glasgow |
I work a lot of hours and it always causes a problem in relationships so for now I'm looking a FWB. Someone to go to club nights with and such (when it's safe) but at the same time I'm happy to meet for one off with the right person.
It's not easy being a single dude on here that's for sure!
S x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are most guys just looking for a one and done? Seem to be struggling to find anyone genuine who wants a bit more than that...
The majority of guys are just looking for “a one and done” sadly "
I wish I could do one nighter but I tend to get too invested in chatting and getting to know folk before I'll meet anyone. So much so I end up just chatting as a friend.lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As your name suggest being submissive one offs are not the way forward.
You need a Dom /s relationship and that needs time to grow and develop.
Hope you find a genuine Dom fab as the highs are incredible.
Good luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are most guys just looking for a one and done? Seem to be struggling to find anyone genuine who wants a bit more than that..."
Not a thing I would ever be interested in,
for me, conversation is the starter which leads to friendship and coffee meets, okay right now it would be a social distance coffee meet
from then it often leads to a snog.....
and the snog is the decider, if the snogging dont work, nothing else will
from there it continues with friendship and when both are comfortable full sex and arranging next meet, it may be a friends with benefits situation or it may lead to something more..
if it is a one and done, that is the decision of the female not me, as I always look for long term arrangements.
Ray.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are most guys just looking for a one and done? Seem to be struggling to find anyone genuine who wants a bit more than that..."
I think that a bit of work on your profile might help. Some of your “requirements “ are a little contradictory.
Perhaps be clearer about what you’re looking for? |
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