The older I get the more I’m realising there is an ebb and flow to everything. Some might say there are seasons of the soul.
I’ve heard of something expressed in Christian circles, I believe by Joyce Meyer in particular. She describes at length the “Dark Night of the Soul”. This (and I’m going to butcher it) is where all Hope feels like it’s lost. You are in a very dark time. Some of you may feel like you are there now.
What I have learnt over many many years and many dark nights is that these are the times were wounds can be healed. Where lessons can be learnt. Sometimes we have to weather a storm to find the bright blue skies.
The analogy that works best for me is the birth of a child. The labour can be excruciating, but it starts with birth pangs. You notice a discomfort coming over you. First off you may just ignore it and say “oh it’s nothing, it’s just a phantom feeling” a short time goes by. Maybe a couple of days then some more pain. No matter how hard you try and deny what is about to happen, it will happen.
The start of a dark period for me often feels the same. One morning I feel a little blue. But I shake my head like an etch-a-sketch and tell myself it’s nothing. Then I feel it again. I’m not ready. I don’t want to go into this place. But it’s coming.
I’ve learnt that when i accept it and allow myself to fall into it, I can traverse from one stage to another with more ease and less discomfort. I known now, after many times that even the darkest part will pass. I know at the time it often doesn’t feel like it.
Like the mother, Howling in pain, wishing for it to end. For rest. For “it” to be taken out of her; I too want it to be over. Unfortunately this is a necessary part of the whole process.
What comes out of this experience for a mother is obvious. It’s beautiful. It’s new. It’s full of potential. We forget that the same can be said for “us” as we come out of this dark night.
We are born again. We are full of potential for another day. And we are beautiful. We survived this night. But what have we learnt?
Sometimes lessons are obvious. Sometimes not so much.
Does it matter? Does everything have to be measured?
Maybe the most valuable lesson is that you survived AGAIN. and will survive in the future.
Enjoy the rest. Don’t fear the next night.
What season are you currently in? Do you recognise the signs that the seasons are changing?
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