FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > What makes you take a break from Fab?
What makes you take a break from Fab?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We don’t take official breaks, more like we use it a lot less at times. It just becomes like another job to maintain and once it’s not as fun then what’s the point. |
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I have a break in the school hols so I can concentrate on family life and stop the constant messaging on here, I always feel refreshed and ready to start the fab dance again, it's amazing how much mental energy is drained from chatting online  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We felt that we have come a long way since joining and a lot of things have changed in our views, what we're looking for etc. We had a massive block list of people we didn't want to meet initially (it's the only way of stopping them appearing in searches) for various reasons that we have changed our minds about over time. And you can't bulk delete the block list.
We felt we needed a fresh start and our old profile wasn't suiting us anymore. Simply rewriting it wouldn't have addressed the block list and a few other things.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My profile was recently hidden for 18 months.
It is all too easy for it to monopolise your time. Life outside is also more important.
Now I just chat to my friends and post on the forums for a bit of escapism.
I find that if I only have an eye on show on my profile I get very few messages. This place then doesn't become so overwhelming. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Simply real life and not being in the mood. We aren't machines switched on to fab life continuously. It's natural and healthy to take a break now and then. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For companionship this time
What I desire has changed over the years.
I originally joined as my child was young and with no rare child free nights it was useful to be able to socialise. I’ve had three times away where I just delete everything - tried dating and became very cynical as the man I met was married.
Came back, extremely cynical and didn’t want anyone close.
Things change, self preservation can be a hindrance occasionally.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Those of you who have left and come back. What are the reason? "
I've never left but do hide my profile sometimes as the stalking gets a bit too much Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Drama and negativity has put me off this place recently, but there are still loads of nice folk so I'm still here and i hope the change in seasons lifts peoples moods. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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how can you leave an internet domain its a cyberspace every time you log out you leave it it only becomes really when you meet the people at the other end    |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how can you leave an internet domain its a cyberspace every time you log out you leave it it only becomes really when you meet the people at the other end "
real not really |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"how can you leave an internet domain its a cyberspace every time you log out you leave it it only becomes really when you meet the people at the other end "
But you can get a bit addicted to this place can't you! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how can you leave an internet domain its a cyberspace every time you log out you leave it it only becomes really when you meet the people at the other end real not really "
It is the space that the Fab cyberspace takes up that can be an issue. It is very much somewhere we leave a mark whether real or not.
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"how can you leave an internet domain its a cyberspace every time you log out you leave it it only becomes really when you meet the people at the other end
But you can get a bit addicted to this place can't you!"
Very, and in a very short space of time too  |
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I came off here s few years back due to being in a relationship, even though we met on here this life style wasn't for him.
More recently (last year) had a break due to a couple of major operations.
Yes there is a negative side to FAB but the positives for me outweigh that. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"For some time out. I’ve left about 5/6 times now
But then you have to start all over again.
I don’t mind that "
I suppose I don't show my veris anyway, but some I like to look back on as little memories |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For some time out. I’ve left about 5/6 times now
But then you have to start all over again.
I don’t mind that "
Those that you consider friends will remember you when you come back. So from that aspect it isn't starting all over. |
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"For some time out. I’ve left about 5/6 times now
But then you have to start all over again.
I don’t mind that
Those that you consider friends will remember you when you come back. So from that aspect it isn't starting all over. "
I can relate to this. It’s lovely coming back and chatting to your old friends again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For some time out. I’ve left about 5/6 times now
But then you have to start all over again.
I don’t mind that
I suppose I don't show my veris anyway, but some I like to look back on as little memories "
print them off and frame them  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"For some time out. I’ve left about 5/6 times now
But then you have to start all over again.
I don’t mind that
I suppose I don't show my veris anyway, but some I like to look back on as little memories print them off and frame them "
Haha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Think family time is really important think when my son was younger I never entertained the idea of coming on here there can be many things that contribute needing a break from time to time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t want this to be my lot, in life. I’d really like to get to a place where I can have a monogamous relationship with someone. Ideally someone I meet who has seen my eyes before they’ve seen my nipples
So each time I leave, it’s with that optimism |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was originally on here as part of a couple. I took about a six month break before deciding to return as a single. I had adjustments to make and that was easier without the complications of fab. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don’t want this to be my lot, in life. I’d really like to get to a place where I can have a monogamous relationship with someone. Ideally someone I meet who has seen my eyes before they’ve seen my nipples
So each time I leave, it’s with that optimism "
I get that, and there are times when I think I'd like a monogamous relationship, but I really enjoy this, and I'd like to be in a place where I can enjoy being polyamorous. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
Drama and agro makes me take a break. I tend to hide my profile tho and don't leave I think if I ever delete my profile then I won't be back on. I'm. Too lazy to start all over. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sometimes I need a reality check and to get away from my bloody phone. I only hide my profile. I’d only ever delete if I met someone and was in a committed vanilla relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I hide my profile I still access fab. The only way I can give myself a enforced break is to delete my profile. Hence I've bounced back on and off a few times although the last time deleting wasn't my choice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I usually only do short stays, use it way too much for a bit then when I've a few new friends in my phone contacts I lose interest in the site a bit. I don't think deleting is that big a deal, I've never bothered about losing veris or pics. Then when I'm in the mood for it again I just start fresh. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t want this to be my lot, in life. I’d really like to get to a place where I can have a monogamous relationship with someone. Ideally someone I meet who has seen my eyes before they’ve seen my nipples
So each time I leave, it’s with that optimism "
 I totally get this - even though I would like a FWB not a monogamous relationship.
I have left Fab a few times in the hope I might meet someone away from the internet.
Fab makes me feel that its impossible to trust anyone - there are a lot of men bored of their monogamous relationships and are on here filling their boots.
I no longer want to be the boot filler |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having read this post am actually considering deleting my account though in a positive way and to be honest I speak to people I would consider to be friends off here anyway! So wouldn't lose much ... thinking hat required! Thanks guys x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get bored. My work gets busy busy. My interests switch off for a few months / half a year.
Get fed up with site owners rarely dealing with stolen pics etc so gets on my tits. multitude of reasons.
Site is about having fun. When it no longer is fun I leave. Think I have had around 10 profiles since 2011. Mostly the same / similar variants of username . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a wee movie montage in my head now of lots of Fabbers wistfully pondering whether it's time to hit delete
It's even got the perfect song! https://youtu.be/D5JX4-zZbiY |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a wee movie montage in my head now of lots of Fabbers wistfully pondering whether it's time to hit delete
It's even got the perfect song! https://youtu.be/D5JX4-zZbiY"
Hahahahahahahaha made me laugh! I've decided, off the back of this thread, to leave at the end of my subscription definitely! Be my first time leaving |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get bored of the Forums and if I can't find anybody local to meet, it gets frustrating and then I start being negative so I hide my profile and concentrate on other things. I've never had more than a 2 month break in 5 yrs though, but my time on here is becoming less and less. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The fab police on the forum!! As this is all I use fab for now days, when you comment on something and within five mins you get the clowns texting who are just looking for arguments |
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I think we’ve talked about this before, and I can only speak from my own experiences.
There are a lot of wonderful reasons to be part of this community, confidence and self discovery being only two. But Fab can also be a distorting influence. It can inflate or damage our egos, alter our sense of compassion, feed our need for connection and damage our sense of perspective. I know for certain that I’ve let myself get too caught up in this world and I’ve said things that I regret. Mostly because I’m an emotional guy and I can lose perspective. Even the most kind and gentle of us can fall into that trap.
Hiding the profile, stepping back for a few days, imposing some distance from the forums, it all allows for some self reflection, and a reset.
Each time I’ve take a brief break and come back I’ve been able to learn a little more from previous experiences and past mistakes.
This life is a journey and it’s easy to get lost in it. None of us are perfect. What matters is that we do what’s best for ourselves. We often talk about the steps we take to ensure our physical safety and health. We don’t often discuss our emotional safety and sense of perspective, but we should. A break allows us to reset, get some perspective, and reflect xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t want this to be my lot, in life. I’d really like to get to a place where I can have a monogamous relationship with someone. Ideally someone I meet who has seen my eyes before they’ve seen my nipples
So each time I leave, it’s with that optimism
I totally get this - even though I would like a FWB not a monogamous relationship.
I have left Fab a few times in the hope I might meet someone away from the internet.
Fab makes me feel that its impossible to trust anyone - there are a lot of men bored of their monogamous relationships and are on here filling their boots.
I no longer want to be the boot filler "
Glad it’s not just me x |
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Sometimes I just get a bit jaded with it all and hide my profile for a while - it can be for different reasons. And occasionally I just have stuff going on in my life and don't have the time or inclination to be on here. |
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Currently on a sabbatical from meeting and I have hidden my profile. It doesn't mean I won't contribute to forums but just keeping my online presence on this site to the minimum.
I just needed time away, didn't login for a couple of weeks then occasionally checked out the forums after that. I'm slowly coming back, but a new relationship deserves my time and energy than this place. If it does become more permanent I will delete my profile to try and make it work.
A lot of really great people I've met on here, so will consider my options in the near future. |
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There's been a lot of negativity recently and a lot of shit to wade through in my inbox at times - some of it pretty vile stuff.
I like to think I'm quite inoffensive on here, don't get involved in anything too contentious or play politics or drama headgames, so I can't imagine the sort of shit that gets thrown at the more popular posters on here!
I've not been here long enough to leave and come back, but I had a break of a few days last week and noticed a huge improvement in my mood and outlook, so maybe it is my time to head off, who knows? |
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"Sometimes I just get a bit jaded with it all and hide my profile for a while - it can be for different reasons. And occasionally I just have stuff going on in my life and don't have the time or inclination to be on here. "
Absolutely |
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The same old boring messages that lead to nowhere. Turns me off more than anything. It leaves me with a total headache.
I am due for another break from this place again. I might not bother coming back this time. |
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