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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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delete all the numbers email addresses photos anything that could bear a reminder
go out with ya mates a few drinks a laugh and gradually you will move on and find someone else or something else |
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"How do you move on form some who you have really fallen for in every and not just sexually but you know they don't see you the same way "
With great difficulty.
Not helpful i know but may as well be realistic. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its an awful feeling, smallest things will set off memories and it all floods back then the feeling becomes raw and painful again
Id agree with the delete all contact, keep busy, try not to mope around.
good luck and *hugs* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wish it was that easy as this person has been in my life for over 20 years and a very close friend "
u cant stay platonic now as it will cut u up even more. so cut ties now and not think what if just think next |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I have fucked over ppl and even have a gf but my mind still go's back to her and we never done done more then the odd kiss but I can't get her off my mind I'm even helping her to fine a bf |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have fucked over ppl and even have a gf but my mind still go's back to her and we never done done more then the odd kiss but I can't get her off my mind I'm even helping her to fine a bf " Hun have u come clean 2 her?????
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ouch!!! That's a nitemare... U gotta fuck those feelings away on a swingin site
who said it was from here? he has known them 20 years" sorry wasn't how I meant that! Meant get swingin like mad so u don't hav time 2 think of feelins u hav 4 her.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been under alot but the feelings come back after a while
And no i haven't told her fully all i have told her is a regret not asking her out "
Put ya cards on table....u will regret not doing that if you dont BUT if she is not feeling the same....clean break....no more contact. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"completely cold turkey
delete all numbers, email addresses, facebook, twitter etc"
Good advice sometimes cutting all ties is the only way. Ok you could stop friends but sometimes a total break for a while at least is the best option. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have told my self that many times and it isn't that easy as she's good friends with my gf and i love her as well but i love the other girl more
"
any chance of you all living together in a MFM relationship ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you move on form some who you have really fallen for in every and not just sexually but you know they don't see you the same way "
It is really difficult to move on, I still adored my ex wife when we split but I know now I can never see her again, infact the very thought of seeing her now scares me. She sadly passed away 8 months ago |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"wouldn't be able to have a clean brake as I'm also good friends with her mom sister and brother "
A sit down, a talk clear the air, set a path to move on and accept what the other wants and doesn't. Its not going to be easy but good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"wouldn't be able to have a clean brake as I'm also good friends with her mom sister and brother "
If you speak french try the foriegn legion..... sorry to make light as this will prob hurt at some point x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"wouldn't be able to have a clean brake as I'm also good friends with her mom sister and brother
If you speak french try the foriegn legion..... sorry to make light as this will prob hurt at some point x"
Or offer them "Anel" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you move on form some who you have really fallen for in every and not just sexually but you know they don't see you the same way "
Have you ever thought about giving swinging a go..helps u forget and fills a basic need without the emotional attachment....saves on the kleenex ..well in one way i guess but not another |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you move on form some who you have really fallen for in every and not just sexually but you know they don't see you the same way
Have you ever thought about giving swinging a go..helps u forget and fills a basic need without the emotional attachment....saves on the kleenex ..well in one way i guess but not another "
That's a bit harsh was it really called for when the guy is upset? |
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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
Happened to me. He said I was more than a fb but wanted to control who I saw. Not for me so I'm back on my own.
I was totally smitten but couldn't be with someone that controlling.
Yes I wanted it to work but you can't help who you fall in love with. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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it is very hard mate emotions are a cruel thing to deal with, i know been there got the t-shirt, but time is a great healer, you wont ever forget but you will move on with your life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you move on form some who you have really fallen for in every and not just sexually but you know they don't see you the same way
Have you ever thought about giving swinging a go..helps u forget and fills a basic need without the emotional attachment....saves on the kleenex ..well in one way i guess but not another
That's a bit harsh was it really called for when the guy is upset?"
what all i was saying is ive been in the same boat aint we all loved and lost at some stage in our life? when it happened to me i happened to find here and it helped me heal quicker emotiaonally ..yknow get over it and move on Call me an emotional coward if you want i dont care ...but when u loved and lost and that person you loved died in a car accident well i dont wanna get that attatched to anyone again so swinging fills that emotional void be it briefly i did parties i did clubs i did 3somes 4smomes moresomes but that wasnt what i really wanted i simply needed to feel human on occassion and the intamacy not so much the sex of a 1 on 1 counter with a lady gave me what i needed
In terms of the kleenex no offence was intended other than theres other uses for them other than wiping away tears ... the scenario here is the op loves someone the person of his affections doesnt reciprocate his feelings ..shes not died ...they can still be m8s cant they what other alternative is there other than to move on and get on. |
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"I have told my self that many times and it isn't that easy as she's good friends with my gf and i love her as well but i love the other girl more
any chance of you all living together in a MFM relationship ?"
MFM?Think you got your genders mixed up lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have told my self that many times and it isn't that easy as she's good friends with my gf and i love her as well but i love the other girl more
"
Mate this is going to sound harsh and I guess it is but take a look at yourself and sort your life out.
You are on here as a single man, you have a g/f and you say you are in love with someone else?
Can you not see why that combination easily adds up to a massive headfuck? In all seriousness are you perhaps fixating on her in order to detract from the (assumes) unhappiness in your relationship? |
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Jesus...don't some people like drama.
Op...sigh...you have a girlfriend you "love". But you're pining after this woman you also 'love". You can't let her go because you're friends with her family etc.
EVERY solution put forward you've shot down. Admit it, you like the drama of being torn between two lovers. So why are you pretending to seek a solution? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Jesus...don't some people like drama.
Op...sigh...you have a girlfriend you "love". But you're pining after this woman you also 'love". You can't let her go because you're friends with her family etc.
EVERY solution put forward you've shot down. Admit it, you like the drama of being torn between two lovers. So why are you pretending to seek a solution? " Harsh but true |
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"I have told my self that many times and it isn't that easy as she's good friends with my gf and i love her as well but i love the other girl more
Mate this is going to sound harsh and I guess it is but take a look at yourself and sort your life out.
You are on here as a single man, you have a g/f and you say you are in love with someone else?
Can you not see why that combination easily adds up to a massive headfuck? In all seriousness are you perhaps fixating on her in order to detract from the (assumes) unhappiness in your relationship?"
Not just me then! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Jesus...don't some people like drama.
Op...sigh...you have a girlfriend you "love". But you're pining after this woman you also 'love". You can't let her go because you're friends with her family etc.
EVERY solution put forward you've shot down. Admit it, you like the drama of being torn between two lovers. So why are you pretending to seek a solution? "
and dint some one say he on here on a single profile ? reminds me of that brmc song ..spread your love like a fever |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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She sees you as a friend and your feelings will blur that if you make it known. It isn't her fault that you changed towards her and it would be unfair to burden her with it if she doesn't see you in that light. You have no choice but to suck it up and hold it in and be the friend she thinks you are. If her feelings change she'll be the first to let you know. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"She sees you as a friend and your feelings will blur that if you make it known. It isn't her fault that you changed towards her and it would be unfair to burden her with it if she doesn't see you in that light. You have no choice but to suck it up and hold it in and be the friend she thinks you are. If her feelings change she'll be the first to let you know."
i never thought ide do this to one of your posts wishy so ere goes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have told my self that many times and it isn't that easy as she's good friends with my gf and i love her as well but i love the other girl more
Mate this is going to sound harsh and I guess it is but take a look at yourself and sort your life out.
You are on here as a single man, you have a g/f and you say you are in love with someone else?
Can you not see why that combination easily adds up to a massive headfuck? In all seriousness are you perhaps fixating on her in order to detract from the (assumes) unhappiness in your relationship?
Not just me then!"
Exactly what i thought when I saw your post! It has to be said I missed your posts when you weren't around!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"She sees you as a friend and your feelings will blur that if you make it known. It isn't her fault that you changed towards her and it would be unfair to burden her with it if she doesn't see you in that light. You have no choice but to suck it up and hold it in and be the friend she thinks you are. If her feelings change she'll be the first to let you know.
i never thought ide do this to one of your posts wishy so ere goes "
Hey, I'm not all bad you know, I do have a heart, sometimes. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"She sees you as a friend and your feelings will blur that if you make it known. It isn't her fault that you changed towards her and it would be unfair to burden her with it if she doesn't see you in that light. You have no choice but to suck it up and hold it in and be the friend she thinks you are. If her feelings change she'll be the first to let you know."
thats it all over i dont want to make it a burden for her and havent told her how i feel and i think that is whats making it so hard to move on form her |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"How do you move on form some who you have really fallen for in every and not just sexually but you know they don't see you the same way
Have you ever thought about giving swinging a go..helps u forget and fills a basic need without the emotional attachment....saves on the kleenex ..well in one way i guess but not another
That's a bit harsh was it really called for when the guy is upset?
what all i was saying is ive been in the same boat aint we all loved and lost at some stage in our life? when it happened to me i happened to find here and it helped me heal quicker emotiaonally ..yknow get over it and move on Call me an emotional coward if you want i dont care ...but when u loved and lost and that person you loved died in a car accident well i dont wanna get that attatched to anyone again so swinging fills that emotional void be it briefly i did parties i did clubs i did 3somes 4smomes moresomes but that wasnt what i really wanted i simply needed to feel human on occassion and the intamacy not so much the sex of a 1 on 1 counter with a lady gave me what i needed
In terms of the kleenex no offence was intended other than theres other uses for them other than wiping away tears ... the scenario here is the op loves someone the person of his affections doesnt reciprocate his feelings ..shes not died ...they can still be m8s cant they what other alternative is there other than to move on and get on. "
my gf knows all about me being on here and she is fine with it as she has a low sex drive and i have a high so by being here i'm able to meet my sexually needs and at times my gf even comes to the clubs with me
and ny gf is the main reason i havent told this other woman about my feelings as i dont want to see her get hurt so i know it may see i'm just being greedy by others but it's not like that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you move on form some who you have really fallen for in every and not just sexually but you know they don't see you the same way
Have you ever thought about giving swinging a go..helps u forget and fills a basic need without the emotional attachment....saves on the kleenex ..well in one way i guess but not another
That's a bit harsh was it really called for when the guy is upset?
what all i was saying is ive been in the same boat aint we all loved and lost at some stage in our life? when it happened to me i happened to find here and it helped me heal quicker emotiaonally ..yknow get over it and move on Call me an emotional coward if you want i dont care ...but when u loved and lost and that person you loved died in a car accident well i dont wanna get that attatched to anyone again so swinging fills that emotional void be it briefly i did parties i did clubs i did 3somes 4smomes moresomes but that wasnt what i really wanted i simply needed to feel human on occassion and the intamacy not so much the sex of a 1 on 1 counter with a lady gave me what i needed
In terms of the kleenex no offence was intended other than theres other uses for them other than wiping away tears ... the scenario here is the op loves someone the person of his affections doesnt reciprocate his feelings ..shes not died ...they can still be m8s cant they what other alternative is there other than to move on and get on.
my gf knows all about me being on here and she is fine with it as she has a low sex drive and i have a high so by being here i'm able to meet my sexually needs and at times my gf even comes to the clubs with me
and ny gf is the main reason i havent told this other woman about my feelings as i dont want to see her get hurt so i know it may see i'm just being greedy by others but it's not like that "
You talk about feelings what are your feelings for your gf then ..maybe ime reading this wrong but you mustnt have had many for her to get involved with another woman and transfer your feelings over to her....have you ever thought about her feelings other than your own ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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That's what you don't understand I haven't got involved with other woman I just can't get her out of my head I've been close fiends with her for over 20 years but lately I have started seeing her as more then a close friend |
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Honesty is not always the best policy.
You have to weigh up the emotional damage you would be doing ti people you care about before embarking on a tell all session.
You also have to consider a worst case scenario: you loose your girlfriend and her friends and family. Your friend is horrified and you loose her, you upset her friends and family ad well.
I'm not saying don't do it, just be sure that you're ready for any fallout. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That's what you don't understand I haven't got involved with other woman I just can't get her out of my head I've been close fiends with her for over 20 years but lately I have started seeing her as more then a close friend "
think ile move on...give it a try yourself it might sort out your emotional turmoil and make you feel better ime not a trained therapist on such matters ...i wouldnt try stalking so maybe give the samaritans a bell |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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That's just how I am looking at it as I don't want to lose my gf as I'd miss her and I don't want to to lose my friend by telling her how I feel about her and to find out she doesn't feel the same as it would kill me so I rather go on like this rather then risk lossing it all |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"That's what you don't understand I haven't got involved with other woman I just can't get her out of my head I've been close fiends with her for over 20 years but lately I have started seeing her as more then a close friend
think ile move on...give it a try yourself it might sort out your emotional turmoil and make you feel better ime not a trained therapist on such matters ...i wouldnt try stalking so maybe give the samaritans a bell "
I had thought I had moved as I went though this before when she had a bf so let the idea of us go and found a gf who I've been with for almost 5 years but now all the old feelings have came back from out of the blue |
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By *ove2-shareCouple
over a year ago
South Gloucestershire |
you are emotionally trapping ourself in the situation, Concentrate on yourself, do whatever it is that you do thats fun, and yes that includes sex, but not just that youve got to build a positive life without them concentating on your own needs. as it is you are training youself to think about them constantly. and to only see a life with them as better than the present.take life by the horns and bloody well enjoy it once you can do that youll be able to look upon the past with a fresher healthier perspective. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you move on form some who you have really fallen for in every and not just sexually but you know they don't see you the same way "
start by getting a grip !
you have understood that the other party doesn't have the same feelings for you as you have for them.
whilst you might not want to accept it, you know you must do.
your opening thread says as much.
you are further down the 'moving on' path than you know, if u have the ability to recognise both those things
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