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Married men
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
No attach means more easy to meet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
from my experience they don't want any drama. I am the same no married men for those certain reasons |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Attached people are often restricted to when they can meet.
There's the risk of the partner finding out and causing drama.
Cheaters are already being dishonest to the person they love, many would assume that makes them untrustworthy in general. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
No we just don't want to be party to husbands cheating on their wives.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would thought the opposite,more drama from single guy,especially if he fell big time for you "
Rather not go there. There plenty of sexy hot single out there to choose from. Why rock the boat when you don't need too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?
No we just don't want to be party to husbands cheating on their wives....
"
I agree don't want to be aparty to all that |
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By *wentMan
over a year ago
blackpool |
"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?
No we just don't want to be party to husbands cheating on their wives...."
Preferences of people, don’t want any hearts broken. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?
No we just don't want to be party to husbands cheating on their wives....
Preferences of people, don’t want any hearts broken. "
 |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"My first wife used to cheat,1980s,I felt gutted at time,as I think most would,still think about it,hence why I was interested in points of view "
So I assume you wouldn't cheat and put someone else through that. |
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
I had a fantastic night/morning with a married man yesterday/today!
However - he’s part of a fab couple and we met openly with her permission!
I don’t need the drama of meeting the ‘playing away’ category. A couple of months ago I was WhatsApped by the wife (and baby daughter) that I didn’t know existed of a guy who told me he wanted a relationship with me. I’ve no wish to be involved in the break down of a relationship - even inadvertently! X |
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By *hippy57 OP Man
over a year ago
Chelmsford |
Trust ,is a wonderful thing,I remember my old dad telling me,you think you got lots of mates etc,someone you can truly trust very rare,he was so right,he was the only person I could trust 100% |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I often wonder how the married people on here would feel if their partner were cheating....
If there’s no food in the cupboard at home, a hungry man (or woman) will go out to eat...."
Oh.. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"Trust ,is a wonderful thing,I remember my old dad telling me,you think you got lots of mates etc,someone you can truly trust very rare,he was so right,he was the only person I could trust 100%"
Oh thats a shame , I have many people in my life I can trust.. |
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"I often wonder how the married people on here would feel if their partner were cheating....
If there’s no food in the cupboard at home, a hungry man (or woman) will go out to eat...."
That's the bottom line really. Emotional or sexual neglect will cause issues and sometimes people will solve those issues outside of a relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Usually married guys are here and partnees dont know. "
I would guess there is the same proportion of married women on here (whose partners are unaware) as there are married men doing the same. Just more men than women on Fab. |
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"Usually married guys are here and partnees dont know.
I would guess there is the same proportion of married women on here (whose partners are unaware) as there are married men doing the same. Just more men than women on Fab."
Married women are treated very differently to married men on fab. |
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Lots of reasons, including people here who have been hurt or seen others devastated after they find out that their trust was misjudged and trashed - some people struggling to trust others again.
People also want no complications sex and married men may give the opposite, have limited free time with little flexibility to fit that of someone without commitments.
How much do you trust someone who is deceitful to their closest partner? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Usually married guys are here and partnees dont know.
I would guess there is the same proportion of married women on here (whose partners are unaware) as there are married men doing the same. Just more men than women on Fab.
Married women are treated very differently to married men on fab."
Yes, I suppose it is the reverse of the situation where a man can have many notches on a bedpost and it is a badge of honour, yet a woman that has sex with a series of men gets called a “slag” or a “slut”.
We live in a world of double standards and finger-pointing, unfortunately. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One for the guys,would you meet a married women if she on here without her husband knowing she on fab "
Yes. I have met two married women on here unbeknownst to their other halves and mine.
I am happily married, as was at least one of the two aforementioned ladies.
Not everyone cheats because of a lack of sex at home either. Quite the opposite for me. My wife has a much bigger libido than me but when I'm more active outside my marriage, I'm more active within it too.
I accept that I have lower moral standards than most on here and risk jeopardising my relationship as a result. I have no excuses. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We or I should say my wife as it’s her choice understand that men are men and as this adventure on fab is hers it’s the same for men so we don’t object to married men at all.
If they get caught it’s not our problem.
T |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Live and let live.
Always 3 sides to every story and we always seem to hear from the wounded party on here!
If you dont want to meet attached people, cheating or not then dont. It really is that simple. Not sure why you feel the need to bleat about it on the forums. |
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"One for the guys,would you meet a married women if she on here without her husband knowing she on fan "
100% makes it more fun and I find it a turn on.
Had one friend who used to love going home after sex. Then getting her partner to fuck her again! |
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
I've changed by meet criteria over the years. I now exclude married men because:
* I don't invite anyone into my home who won't invite me to theirs.
* I do not want to bathe and use perfume the wife wears so not to leave a scent trail.
* I don't want to be told " No marking"...
* I don't like time limits when I'm playing or people wanting to hang around as it's too early to go home.
I could go on. All of the above I experienced before I changed my meet and play criteria. I don't play nice and I've been known to mark, shave and "tattoo".
Married men know better than to contact me, so win win.
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?
I've changed by meet criteria over the years. I now exclude married men because:
* I don't invite anyone into my home who won't invite me to theirs.
* I do not want to bathe and use perfume the wife wears so not to leave a scent trail.
* I don't want to be told " No marking"...
* I don't like time limits when I'm playing or people wanting to hang around as it's too early to go home.
I could go on. All of the above I experienced before I changed my meet and play criteria. I don't play nice and I've been known to mark, shave and "tattoo".
Married men know better than to contact me, so win win.
"
How would they? Your profile is hidden....?  |
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
Women for you. As far as I know, it's all to do with jealousy, etc. "Oh, can't have you if you think some other woman is better. You chose another woman, so go to her.", etc. |
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You get plenty of profile stating no married men, I can understand the not wanting to get involved for all the reasons above. Generally I won't message and respect that, but I always wonder does that apply to married/attached men playing with permission? Or is it a case that they see that as a lie? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You get plenty of profile stating no married men, I can understand the not wanting to get involved for all the reasons above. Generally I won't message and respect that, but I always wonder does that apply to married/attached men playing with permission? Or is it a case that they see that as a lie?"
If they can speak to the other half then problem sorted |
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"Usually married guys are here and partnees dont know.
I would guess there is the same proportion of married women on here (whose partners are unaware) as there are married men doing the same. Just more men than women on Fab.
Married women are treated very differently to married men on fab."
That's mainly because women are much rarer on fabs. (male) beggars can't be choosers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Live and let live. OK, I may have a bias on this, being in the very situation, but of the women I've spoken to and met; I know fellow cheaters, I know women who have no problem with it, and I know women who actively seek married men. If I've spoken with someone who is against it and tells me so, then I'll thank them for their time and respect their point of view. I also know of stories of women who say "no to married", but bend their own rules as soon as they find out he is worth bending them for, whether that be he is a chiselled adonis, or happens to be a genuinely nice guy (but just a cheat)!
What I do notice though, is the level of 'judgement' bestowed by a proportion of the naysayers.
The swinging lifestyle is 'judged' on the whole, fairly negatively by society, but those within it think society is wrong. A bit unfair to bemoan judgement for what you do, while judging someoene else for what they do.
Like I say, I respect anybody's position, we're all different. |
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"Usually married guys are here and partnees dont know.
I would guess there is the same proportion of married women on here (whose partners are unaware) as there are married men doing the same. Just more men than women on Fab.
Married women are treated very differently to married men on fab.
That's mainly because women are much rarer on fabs. (male) beggars can't be choosers. "
Probably but there also seems to be the general idea that if a man's here behind his partners back she's at home crying while looking after several waif like children with no help from him, while working full time and running the home. If a woman's doing the same thing it's because her partner neglects her.
When it comes to infidelity it's a woman's world |
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"Doesn't bother me he's the one cheating not me it's just sex I'm not getting into an emotional relationship with him.
As long as I am told from the start and not fed a load of bullshit."
Hallelujah  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It just doesn't sit well with some people.
For me, I've just never wanted their Mrs contacting me if they were to find out (yes, that's happened), don't want the drama. |
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"Usually married guys are here and partnees dont know.
I would guess there is the same proportion of married women on here (whose partners are unaware) as there are married men doing the same. Just more men than women on Fab.
Married women are treated very differently to married men on fab.
That's mainly because women are much rarer on fabs. (male) beggars can't be choosers.
Probably but there also seems to be the general idea that if a man's here behind his partners back she's at home crying while looking after several waif like children with no help from him, while working full time and running the home. If a woman's doing the same thing it's because her partner neglects her.
When it comes to infidelity it's a woman's world"
I don't disagree with that, but I think that itself is a function of the fact that fewer women cheat (surveys have been done)... |
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"You get plenty of profile stating no married men, I can understand the not wanting to get involved for all the reasons above. Generally I won't message and respect that, but I always wonder does that apply to married/attached men playing with permission? Or is it a case that they see that as a lie?"
We will meet married men who have an agreement but that agreement needs to be well verified, so far that's happened only once. |
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"Usually married guys are here and partnees dont know.
I would guess there is the same proportion of married women on here (whose partners are unaware) as there are married men doing the same. Just more men than women on Fab.
Married women are treated very differently to married men on fab.
That's mainly because women are much rarer on fabs. (male) beggars can't be choosers.
Probably but there also seems to be the general idea that if a man's here behind his partners back she's at home crying while looking after several waif like children with no help from him, while working full time and running the home. If a woman's doing the same thing it's because her partner neglects her.
When it comes to infidelity it's a woman's world
I don't disagree with that, but I think that itself is a function of the fact that fewer women cheat (surveys have been done)... "
No surveys have been done on this but my opinion and experience is that in general women will try and fix a relationship and men will try and find a solution outside of it. Also for men it's often about sex while for women it's about feelings, women will be emotionally unfaithful and can conceal that more easily. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Doesn't bother me he's the one cheating not me it's just sex I'm not getting into an emotional relationship with him.
As long as I am told from the start and not fed a load of bullshit.
Hallelujah "
Amen  |
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"Usually married guys are here and partnees dont know.
I would guess there is the same proportion of married women on here (whose partners are unaware) as there are married men doing the same. Just more men than women on Fab.
Married women are treated very differently to married men on fab.
That's mainly because women are much rarer on fabs. (male) beggars can't be choosers.
Probably but there also seems to be the general idea that if a man's here behind his partners back she's at home crying while looking after several waif like children with no help from him, while working full time and running the home. If a woman's doing the same thing it's because her partner neglects her.
When it comes to infidelity it's a woman's world
I don't disagree with that, but I think that itself is a function of the fact that fewer women cheat (surveys have been done)...
No surveys have been done on this but my opinion and experience is that in general women will try and fix a relationship and men will try and find a solution outside of it. Also for men it's often about sex while for women it's about feelings, women will be emotionally unfaithful and can conceal that more easily. "
That's it I think ?? |
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There a number of women who want to only meet married men as they see them as more stable, clean, emotionally balanced, and less hassle.
They aint going to become clingy as they in a relationship already.
That's what I have been told anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
its an ethics/honesty thing not so much about the fact you're honest about being married but that your partner doesn't know and you're cheating   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Im not here to judge, everyone has a reason for being here and im lucky my hubby supports me allowing me to have BDSM fun.
My reason why I dont play with married men because im a chatter box and I like to connect through conversation.
Ive found out that they can't chat during evenings or weekends as their partners are there.
Thats no good for me as that's the time I mainly chat so I dont bother starting something. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal. It’s always seems like people forget married women are on here as well and have the same meet/time constraints and potential dramas that guys do.
Plenty of people happy to meet married folks as they see them as being more discrete. |
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We probably would not meet anyone to local who was married in case partner found out would cause to much trouble we don't judge people though nothing morally against it no one knows what is going on inside the marriage |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just be honest about it to whoever you’re chatting to/thinking of meeting. They can then make an informed decision on whether they want to meet you. No need for judging or slating. It’s really that simple
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
"Personally I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal. It’s always seems like people forget married women are on here as well and have the same meet/time constraints and potential dramas that guys do.
Plenty of people happy to meet married folks as they see them as being more discrete. "
I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal yes, but part of that is of their own making. I don't see many married women starting threads asking for general forum opinions on their marital status, but lots of men do. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal. It’s always seems like people forget married women are on here as well and have the same meet/time constraints and potential dramas that guys do.
Plenty of people happy to meet married folks as they see them as being more discrete.
I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal yes, but part of that is of their own making. I don't see many married women starting threads asking for general forum opinions on their marital status, but lots of men do. "
yes but women don't struggle getting interest whether they are married and cheating or not and thats the fundamental difference men struggle even if they have great profiles great physiques and great pics |
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
"Personally I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal. It’s always seems like people forget married women are on here as well and have the same meet/time constraints and potential dramas that guys do.
Plenty of people happy to meet married folks as they see them as being more discrete.
I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal yes, but part of that is of their own making. I don't see many married women starting threads asking for general forum opinions on their marital status, but lots of men do. yes but women don't struggle getting interest whether they are married and cheating or not and thats the fundamental difference men struggle even if they have great profiles great physiques and great pics "
It just comes off whiny and desperate. In my opinion. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal. It’s always seems like people forget married women are on here as well and have the same meet/time constraints and potential dramas that guys do.
Plenty of people happy to meet married folks as they see them as being more discrete.
I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal yes, but part of that is of their own making. I don't see many married women starting threads asking for general forum opinions on their marital status, but lots of men do. yes but women don't struggle getting interest whether they are married and cheating or not and thats the fundamental difference men struggle even if they have great profiles great physiques and great pics
It just comes off whiny and desperate. In my opinion. "
maybe so but thats why they do it especially if theyve not asked the question before and we've seen it asked a 100 times |
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?
I've changed by meet criteria over the years. I now exclude married men because:
* I don't invite anyone into my home who won't invite me to theirs.
* I do not want to bathe and use perfume the wife wears so not to leave a scent trail.
* I don't want to be told " No marking"...
* I don't like time limits when I'm playing or people wanting to hang around as it's too early to go home.
I could go on. All of the above I experienced before I changed my meet and play criteria. I don't play nice and I've been known to mark, shave and "tattoo".
Married men know better than to contact me, so win win.
How would they? Your profile is hidden....? "
It is now Einstein: it wasn't always thus! |
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Controversial opinion, but if you're married with an unknowing party, keep quiet about it. You're already being dishonest with your partner so you don't need to have any moral qualms about being dishonest with Internet strangers.
There's literally no upside with saying you are married m your chances of a meet will reduce and given the short term nature of most fab encounters it's unlikely you'll be found out if you lie.
True, you won't be able to accommodate and some people will see that as a sign you are married, but just brazen it out "I don't like inviting strangers to my home but will happily pay for a hotel".
My view is that guys who say they are married do so mainly because they are looking for affirmation and absolution
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Personally I think it’s only fair I am up front with it. I don’t want women to be mislead ... it’s personal choice by me and those I chose to meet. I’m not here for acceptance of those that don’t feel they can give it |
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"Personally I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal. It’s always seems like people forget married women are on here as well and have the same meet/time constraints and potential dramas that guys do.
Plenty of people happy to meet married folks as they see them as being more discrete.
I think married guys get a bit of a rough deal yes, but part of that is of their own making. I don't see many married women starting threads asking for general forum opinions on their marital status, but lots of men do. "
Exactly!
If I were married and playing away I could give two fucks what anyone thought and I sure as hell wouldn't be justifying my position or moaning about people not meeting me because of my marital status! |
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For me the reason is personal...
I've been the woman who's husband cheated on her with another woman. So if a married man on here without his wife's knowledge asked for a meet, I wouldn't care if he was a 10/10 I wouldn't do it. However if the hubby/partner in a couple on fab asked for a meet then that would be different because it's honest..
Lmp |
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"Controversial opinion, but if you're married with an unknowing party, keep quiet about it. You're already being dishonest with your partner so you don't need to have any moral qualms about being dishonest with Internet strangers.
There's literally no upside with saying you are married m your chances of a meet will reduce and given the short term nature of most fab encounters it's unlikely you'll be found out if you lie.
True, you won't be able to accommodate and some people will see that as a sign you are married, but just brazen it out "I don't like inviting strangers to my home but will happily pay for a hotel".
My view is that guys who say they are married do so mainly because they are looking for affirmation and absolution
"
I am married, happily and we did soft swing together
In the end mrs decided it wasn’t for her
She still meets socially from time to time
Most people seem to find the idea of a married guy off putting as he is cheating
I am not , she knows alway. This is what swinging is about, fun play with out the emotions of a relationship ??
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"Last thing you need is an angry wife at the door. "
How does this happen? Do people actually give out personal details like full names and addresses? We try to keep our 'secret life' totally seperate to our 'real life'. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Controversial opinion, but if you're married with an unknowing party, keep quiet about it. You're already being dishonest with your partner so you don't need to have any moral qualms about being dishonest with Internet strangers.
There's literally no upside with saying you are married m your chances of a meet will reduce and given the short term nature of most fab encounters it's unlikely you'll be found out if you lie.
True, you won't be able to accommodate and some people will see that as a sign you are married, but just brazen it out "I don't like inviting strangers to my home but will happily pay for a hotel".
My view is that guys who say they are married do so mainly because they are looking for affirmation and absolution
"
That's an interesting take on it. Infidelity aside, I would rather not lie to anyone so I am up front about it in my profile and have never been intimate with anyone who didn't know my situation.
Believe it or not, I have had much more 'success' since choosing to be so open as there are a LOT of married women on here similarly looking for NSA fun.
I prefer to see married women as we both know what we are doing, we both know it is wrong, but we do not judge each other for it.
I'm not looking for affirmation or absolution but I do completely understand other people's objections and respect them. I certainly wouldn't whine about the unfairness of it all! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Last thing you need is an angry wife at the door.
How does this happen? Do people actually give out personal details like full names and addresses? We try to keep our 'secret life' totally seperate to our 'real life'. "
You get followed!! |
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"Controversial opinion, but if you're married with an unknowing party, keep quiet about it. You're already being dishonest with your partner so you don't need to have any moral qualms about being dishonest with Internet strangers.
There's literally no upside with saying you are married m your chances of a meet will reduce and given the short term nature of most fab encounters it's unlikely you'll be found out if you lie.
True, you won't be able to accommodate and some people will see that as a sign you are married, but just brazen it out "I don't like inviting strangers to my home but will happily pay for a hotel".
My view is that guys who say they are married do so mainly because they are looking for affirmation and absolution
That's an interesting take on it. Infidelity aside, I would rather not lie to anyone so I am up front about it in my profile and have never been intimate with anyone who didn't know my situation.
Believe it or not, I have had much more 'success' since choosing to be so open as there are a LOT of married women on here similarly looking for NSA fun.
I prefer to see married women as we both know what we are doing, we both know it is wrong, but we do not judge each other for it.
I'm not looking for affirmation or absolution but I do completely understand other people's objections and respect them. I certainly wouldn't whine about the unfairness of it all! "
I think you're very much the exception in having a straightforward realistic attitude. Most married men try to justify themselves and expect brownie points for being "honest". Very off putting.
We don't want to know about people's lives outside fabs. If you are cheating, we don't want to know. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Controversial opinion, but if you're married with an unknowing party, keep quiet about it. You're already being dishonest with your partner so you don't need to have any moral qualms about being dishonest with Internet strangers.
There's literally no upside with saying you are married m your chances of a meet will reduce and given the short term nature of most fab encounters it's unlikely you'll be found out if you lie.
True, you won't be able to accommodate and some people will see that as a sign you are married, but just brazen it out "I don't like inviting strangers to my home but will happily pay for a hotel".
My view is that guys who say they are married do so mainly because they are looking for affirmation and absolution
That's an interesting take on it. Infidelity aside, I would rather not lie to anyone so I am up front about it in my profile and have never been intimate with anyone who didn't know my situation.
Believe it or not, I have had much more 'success' since choosing to be so open as there are a LOT of married women on here similarly looking for NSA fun.
I prefer to see married women as we both know what we are doing, we both know it is wrong, but we do not judge each other for it.
I'm not looking for affirmation or absolution but I do completely understand other people's objections and respect them. I certainly wouldn't whine about the unfairness of it all! "
I agree. A fair summary there. |
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By *rtyPartyCouple
over a year ago
Torbay area |
If you are here openly (with each other) as couple then you will, at some point, have discussed openly and honestly about something potentially contentious with that special someone you love, cherish and value.
That can feel risky if you haven't done it... And for many this kind of honesty in their relationship is something they aren't used to and might feel they can't manage.
For some couples that barrier can feel like a right of passage which brings benefits of a closeness far wider than the perhaps obvious... And some of those people look for that same honesty in the other people they choose to bring into their relationship... |
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
What do you mean, health conscious? As in safe sex? Why is that to do with them bring married or not?
I have knowingly been the other woman before, so have first hand experience of the hurt it can cause. I have no wish to be part of that again.
Mrs TMN x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If you are here openly (with each other) as couple then you will, at some point, have discussed openly and honestly about something potentially contentious with that special someone you love, cherish and value.
That can feel risky if you haven't done it... And for many this kind of honesty in their relationship is something they aren't used to and might feel they can't manage.
For some couples that barrier can feel like a right of passage which brings benefits of a closeness far wider than the perhaps obvious... And some of those people look for that same honesty in the other people they choose to bring into their relationship... "
Really good point. I need to have a think about this one. |
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"If you are here openly (with each other) as couple then you will, at some point, have discussed openly and honestly about something potentially contentious with that special someone you love, cherish and value.
That can feel risky if you haven't done it... And for many this kind of honesty in their relationship is something they aren't used to and might feel they can't manage.
For some couples that barrier can feel like a right of passage which brings benefits of a closeness far wider than the perhaps obvious... And some of those people look for that same honesty in the other people they choose to bring into their relationship... "
Excellently worded. |
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"Doesn't bother me he's the one cheating not me it's just sex I'm not getting into an emotional relationship with him.
As long as I am told from the start and not fed a load of bullshit."
I clearly state in the FIRST LINE of my profile that I am playing away, so that people can choose to either block me, or message me, and yet I still get people contacting me who “don’t get involved with married men” |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Having been in an unsatisfying marriage with little chance of changing things at the time, I think differently about this. Although I usually always go for single men, if a married man were to catch my eye, I would base my decision on their individual case and not stick to broad sweeping statements. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I often wonder how the married people on here would feel if their partner were cheating....
If there’s no food in the cupboard at home, a hungry man (or woman) will go out to eat....
That's the bottom line really. Emotional or sexual neglect will cause issues and sometimes people will solve those issues outside of a relationship."
Correct, unfortunately |
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By *rtyPartyCouple
over a year ago
Torbay area |
"Excellently worded. "
Thank-you.
The thing is the feelings that can come from openly and honestly tackle difficult issues in a relationship (of any kind and in any part of your life) can be really liberating. We always feel closer when we've played together... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It doesn’t sit well with me morally. I wouldn’t want to be cheated on so I wouldn’t want to be a part of it.
The worst part about cheating for me would not be the actual sex it would be the guys friends knowing or the girl knowing and feeling sorry for me or thinking I’m a prick cos I’m in the dark.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Last thing you need is an angry wife at the door.
How does this happen? Do people actually give out personal details like full names and addresses? We try to keep our 'secret life' totally seperate to our 'real life'. "
Yes they do
Plus face.b and phone numbers.
Im like you, everything separate! |
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By *ucidityWoman
over a year ago
Nottingham |
"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
I say a slight variation - no married or attached men where their significant other doesn’t know or isn’t enthusiastic about sharing.
What everyone else does with their lives is their call, I make no judgement.
However, I would find it incredibly emotionally distressing to learn I had been an unwitting party to deception of another individual and betraying a commitment they may have made.
|
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"Last thing you need is an angry wife at the door.
How does this happen? Do people actually give out personal details like full names and addresses? We try to keep our 'secret life' totally seperate to our 'real life'. "
Not to do with cheating spouses, but I remember a forumite visiting someone in his home. He offered to drive her home but as she lived with her young daughter she didn't want him to know where she lived.
He called her a cab but sometime later he turned up at her house about 3am, d*unk banging on her door to be let in.
Transpired he knew the guy at the cab office, spun some yarn and got her address. |
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There tooo many liars chests 2timing bastards on here off both sex
Just shaggin behind their partners even worse when they say discretion is a must
Obviouslyvdint give 2 shits shaggin behindcrheir partner especislly if they dont know they are on here.
After all if it is a swingers site
Why are all the married people or with partners not on as couples n shsggin others together.
Spoils it for single people half the time
One day u will all get caught out
Thtn who will b laffin then
Good luck
All u deceitful peopke |
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"There tooo many liars chests 2timing bastards on here off both sex
Just shaggin behind their partners even worse when they say discretion is a must
Obviouslyvdint give 2 shits shaggin behindcrheir partner especislly if they dont know they are on here.
After all if it is a swingers site
Why are all the married people or with partners not on as couples n shsggin others together.
Spoils it for single people half the time
One day u will all get caught out
Thtn who will b laffin then
Good luck
All u deceitful peopke"
I am on as a single & as a cpl. As is my husband. Not sure where I'd stand in your thoughts... |
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
OMG.. Don't use common sense on this site pal, it doesn't wash with anyone! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There tooo many liars chests 2timing bastards on here off both sex
Just shaggin behind their partners even worse when they say discretion is a must
Obviouslyvdint give 2 shits shaggin behindcrheir partner especislly if they dont know they are on here.
After all if it is a swingers site
Why are all the married people or with partners not on as couples n shsggin others together.
Spoils it for single people half the time
One day u will all get caught out
Thtn who will b laffin then
Good luck
All u deceitful peopke"
good lord! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I won't meet cheats.
My current meet is engaged, they used to meet separately and together before they had their daughter. But I know he's completely honest with her. I know he'd never lie to her about meeting me or meet me if she wasn't completely happy with it. We both trust him completely on that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Everyone has their own opinion and their own preferences on why they want to meet and rightly so.
However, I dont think it's necessary to try and make people feel like shit, we have no idea why they choose to do what they do.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
Oh we had a married man wanting to join us. He's never been for his sexual health checks as couldn't explain going to his Mrs and he wouldn't be bringing condoms as what if he forgot one in his pocket and his Mrs found it. Had the cheek to ask if we'd do bb for that reason.
Needless to say we've declined meeting him.
So no, playing away ones are not for us. If anything we see them more dangerous on multiple levels.
Mrs |
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"Last thing you need is an angry wife at the door.
How does this happen? Do people actually give out personal details like full names and addresses? We try to keep our 'secret life' totally seperate to our 'real life'.
You get followed!! "
Think I would easily notice that. |
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"Last thing you need is an angry wife at the door.
How does this happen? Do people actually give out personal details like full names and addresses? We try to keep our 'secret life' totally seperate to our 'real life'.
Not to do with cheating spouses, but I remember a forumite visiting someone in his home. He offered to drive her home but as she lived with her young daughter she didn't want him to know where she lived.
He called her a cab but sometime later he turned up at her house about 3am, d*unk banging on her door to be let in.
Transpired he knew the guy at the cab office, spun some yarn and got her address."
Hope he reported the cab company to the licensing governing body. |
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?
I say a slight variation - no married or attached men where their significant other doesn’t know or isn’t enthusiastic about sharing.
What everyone else does with their lives is their call, I make no judgement.
However, I would find it incredibly emotionally distressing to learn I had been an unwitting party to deception of another individual and betraying a commitment they may have made.
"
How might you feel you had chatted the the guys wife beforehand? |
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?
Oh we had a married man wanting to join us. He's never been for his sexual health checks as couldn't explain going to his Mrs and he wouldn't be bringing condoms as what if he forgot one in his pocket and his Mrs found it. Had the cheek to ask if we'd do bb for that reason.
Needless to say we've declined meeting him.
So no, playing away ones are not for us. If anything we see them more dangerous on multiple levels.
Mrs"
I can understand that’s not a good meet at all
But ( like me ) if the guys has a tested , and happy to leave condoms in his pocket ( mrs knowing and as safe is important she is happier to see them) is that not better ? |
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?
Oh we had a married man wanting to join us. He's never been for his sexual health checks as couldn't explain going to his Mrs and he wouldn't be bringing condoms as what if he forgot one in his pocket and his Mrs found it. Had the cheek to ask if we'd do bb for that reason.
Needless to say we've declined meeting him.
So no, playing away ones are not for us. If anything we see them more dangerous on multiple levels.
Mrs
I can understand that’s not a good meet at all
But ( like me ) if the guys has a tested , and happy to leave condoms in his pocket ( mrs knowing and as safe is important she is happier to see them) is that not better ? "
The post you've quoted clearly refers to those without permission |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There tooo many liars chests 2timing bastards on here off both sex
Just shaggin behind their partners even worse when they say discretion is a must
Obviouslyvdint give 2 shits shaggin behindcrheir partner especislly if they dont know they are on here.
After all if it is a swingers site
Why are all the married people or with partners not on as couples n shsggin others together.
Spoils it for single people half the time
One day u will all get caught out
Thtn who will b laffin then
Good luck
All u deceitful peopke"
Cos the ones at home who don't want to join in, can't have sex, or aren't interested in sex.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would thought the opposite,more drama from single guy,especially if he fell big time for you
If he is a swinger then he won't . "
no one can help their feelings regardless of what they are. |
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"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?
Oh we had a married man wanting to join us. He's never been for his sexual health checks as couldn't explain going to his Mrs and he wouldn't be bringing condoms as what if he forgot one in his pocket and his Mrs found it. Had the cheek to ask if we'd do bb for that reason.
Needless to say we've declined meeting him.
So no, playing away ones are not for us. If anything we see them more dangerous on multiple levels.
Mrs
I can understand that’s not a good meet at all
But ( like me ) if the guys has a tested , and happy to leave condoms in his pocket ( mrs knowing and as safe is important she is happier to see them) is that not better ?
The post you've quoted clearly refers to those without permission "
Most people seem to think if yiu are a married guy it has to be with out permission |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I often wonder how the married people on here would feel if their partner were cheating....
If there’s no food in the cupboard at home, a hungry man (or woman) will go out to eat...."
These days they'll probably hit up a food bank. |
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"Usually married guys are here and partnees dont know.
It doesn’t bother me, but then again I’m married too"
Just so everyone on the thread knows,
I have put one message on here besides this..
Nothing derogatory, yet someone is accusing me of something g I am not guilty of, thanks
Stella
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I often find cheating men are looking for someone to move on to, as they are not brave enough to actually become single!
"
That's an interesting observation. My wife often says that people rarely split up without there being someone else involved. For somebody to instigate a split, they need to be confident the alternative is better. If the alternative is simply not being in a relationship then that's often not enough of a reason to leave.
I hadn't gone a step further and thought actually they're looking for another relationship as a way out.
That's not the case for me but interesting nonetheless.
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By *hippy57 OP Man
over a year ago
Chelmsford |
Sorry everyone did not realise I was going to stir up a hornet nest,by posting this thread,
It was only a observation on most profiles,
Seems there is a lot of moral issues,most about cheating,lying,
Without upsetting anyone,if you are a married couple,who enjoy fun mmf,let's say Saturday evening you had a mmf,
If asked by a friend or workmate etc,what you did at weekend,
Would you lie or tell the truth ? |
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"Sorry everyone did not realise I was going to stir up a hornet nest,by posting this thread,
It was only a observation on most profiles,
Seems there is a lot of moral issues,most about cheating,lying,
Without upsetting anyone,if you are a married couple,who enjoy fun mmf,let's say Saturday evening you had a mmf,
If asked by a friend or workmate etc,what you did at weekend,
Would you lie or tell the truth ?"
lie, our sex life isn't any of their business. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"Sorry everyone did not realise I was going to stir up a hornet nest,by posting this thread,
It was only a observation on most profiles,
Seems there is a lot of moral issues,most about cheating,lying,
Without upsetting anyone,if you are a married couple,who enjoy fun mmf,let's say Saturday evening you had a mmf,
If asked by a friend or workmate etc,what you did at weekend,
Would you lie or tell the truth ?"
There would be no reason to tell them that , not their business, I would say I was out with friends. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?
Oh we had a married man wanting to join us. He's never been for his sexual health checks as couldn't explain going to his Mrs and he wouldn't be bringing condoms as what if he forgot one in his pocket and his Mrs found it. Had the cheek to ask if we'd do bb for that reason.
Needless to say we've declined meeting him.
So no, playing away ones are not for us. If anything we see them more dangerous on multiple levels.
Mrs
I can understand that’s not a good meet at all
But ( like me ) if the guys has a tested , and happy to leave condoms in his pocket ( mrs knowing and as safe is important she is happier to see them) is that not better ?
The post you've quoted clearly refers to those without permission
Most people seem to think if yiu are a married guy it has to be with out permission "
We don't think, we ask the question. Same as with those who can't accommodate. We ask why instead of making assumptions.
As another poster said - I was referring to those who play without permission.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Can I ask why most women and couple profiles say no married or attached men,
Assume most want discreet fun & not wanting marriage etc,
Also would think married guys be more health conscious ?"
Because I've seen too many here without their partner's knowledge and I don't like the dishonesty there. That's not the kind of person I want to be sleeping with.
Also, if they can lie to a spouse, they can certainly lie to me about STI status etc.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
If women, couples don't want to meet married men fine that's their choice and I don't have a problem with that , but married men do get treated with a lot of disdain on here ,we're not all cheating untrustworthy creeps wanting the best of both worlds(and I have been called that on more than one occasion on here), although no doubt some are, some of us have different reasons for being on here, if your in a sexless marriage what is a man supposed to do other than an Escort girl? what would you ladies do? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If women, couples don't want to meet married men fine that's their choice and I don't have a problem with that , but married men do get treated with a lot of disdain on here ,we're not all cheating untrustworthy creeps wanting the best of both worlds(and I have been called that on more than one occasion on here), although no doubt some are, some of us have different reasons for being on here, if your in a sexless marriage what is a man supposed to do other than an Escort girl? what would you ladies do?"
I'm not sure why theres such a desire to announce publicly in the forums, your status as though people expect acceptance.
Face it, it is cheating, so yes everyone who is married without consent is doing that.
Own the situation and decide what you want to do, and if it goes wrong take responsibility, dont be a victim.
Theres plenty of people who have bo interest in your status, and you'll never be accepted by everyone here. |
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"I often wonder how the married people on here would feel if their partner were cheating....
If there’s no food in the cupboard at home, a hungry man (or woman) will go out to eat....
These days they'll probably hit up a food bank."
......aka ‘Fabswingers’...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
We were literally (myself and hubby) discussing this!
No judgement to anyone who is looking for sex outside of their marriage or partnership at all, for us it’s simply that we don’t want to be part of it.
The circumstances matter of course, for instance if your partner has given their blessing for you to play away then that’s a whole different thing, but if you’re being unfaithful then we just don’t want to be involved in that. But it’s just a personal thing, not a moral judgement on anyone.
The only thing I find stressful is lying by omission. When folk don’t state straight up that they are in a relationship, it puts us in a position of helping them cheat without our consent. We’ve had several people start chatting, sexting etc who we’ve got on great with just for them to drop the “I’m married” bombshell after getting intimate with us via phone or webcam. That kinda sucks, especially when the level of want/lust has built up over a few weeks.
So aye, just be honest and it’s all good. We won’t meet you, but there are plenty of folk happy to do so |
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