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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So I have been in and out of the lifestyle a number of years having been in both monogamous/open relationships and single. I miss the open book when it comes to sex the freedom of being with a mind as open minded as myself being able to say or even do exactly whsts on my mind and someone to share stories and experiences with but I've yet to find the balance in a relationship the keeps both parties happy.
Is searching for a like minded person here inevitably doomed to fail?
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"So I have been in and out of the lifestyle a number of years having been in both monogamous/open relationships and single. I miss the open book when it comes to sex the freedom of being with a mind as open minded as myself being able to say or even do exactly whsts on my mind and someone to share stories and experiences with but I've yet to find the balance in a relationship the keeps both parties happy.
Is searching for a like minded person here inevitably doomed to fail?
"
,
No it isn't. I would caution against assuming that swingers are open minded though. My experience is that open minded people are from all walks of life and so are very closed minded people.
I also think it's possible to have a very experimental and open minded relationship while being monogamous.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"So I have been in and out of the lifestyle a number of years having been in both monogamous/open relationships and single. I miss the open book when it comes to sex the freedom of being with a mind as open minded as myself being able to say or even do exactly whsts on my mind and someone to share stories and experiences with but I've yet to find the balance in a relationship the keeps both parties happy.
Is searching for a like minded person here inevitably doomed to fail?
,
No it isn't. I would caution against assuming that swingers are open minded though. My experience is that open minded people are from all walks of life and so are very closed minded people.
I also think it's possible to have a very experimental and open minded relationship while being monogamous. "
Maybe open minded was a poor choice of words. Its more the acceptance for being ones self.
I agree some relationships even them based away from kink can provide that freedom too but I'm tried of guess work and encouraging my wishes. I want someone who brings their own desires to the table.
Also doesn't mean I'm looking for the next person I meet to be a relationship either, but simply that I'm open to it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It can be hard work to be fair.
I've been lucky enough to find what I've been looking for twice.
I'm now on the look out again. I think the trick is to stay relaxed because you never know who is just round the corner
You cant rush these things |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It can be hard work to be fair.
I've been lucky enough to find what I've been looking for twice.
I'm now on the look out again. I think the trick is to stay relaxed because you never know who is just round the corner
You cant rush these things "
Agreed, this is a frustrating place at the best of times haha. I'm in no rush just curious on people thought about finding more than fun on here.
Seems most are just looking to boost the egos or one off flings  |
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It's difficult to find the right person to have a relationship that is of the same mind set as you.
I've discovered that even though many on here are open to different sexual partners as a single person when it comes to a relationship they want monogamy and usually that is with someone who has had very few sexual partners. Which I think is ironic and contradictive because they themselves have had many partners but they refuse to accept that their partner have the same experiences.
Basically putting it bluntly they don't think people on here are good enough for a relationship because they indulge in sexual freedom.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's difficult to find the right person to have a relationship that is of the same mind set as you.
I've discovered that even though many on here are open to different sexual partners as a single person when it comes to a relationship they want monogamy and usually that is with someone who has had very few sexual partners. Which I think is ironic and contradictive because they themselves have had many partners but they refuse to accept that their partner have the same experiences.
Basically putting it bluntly they don't think people on here are good enough for a relationship because they indulge in sexual freedom.
"
That's a very I interesting view and I can certainly see where your coming from there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It can be hard work to be fair.
I've been lucky enough to find what I've been looking for twice.
I'm now on the look out again. I think the trick is to stay relaxed because you never know who is just round the corner
You cant rush these things
Agreed, this is a frustrating place at the best of times haha. I'm in no rush just curious on people thought about finding more than fun on here.
Seems most are just looking to boost the egos or one off flings "
Totally agree  |
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"It can be hard work to be fair.
I've been lucky enough to find what I've been looking for twice.
I'm now on the look out again. I think the trick is to stay relaxed because you never know who is just round the corner
You cant rush these things
Agreed, this is a frustrating place at the best of times haha. I'm in no rush just curious on people thought about finding more than fun on here.
Seems most are just looking to boost the egos or one off flings "
I
Is that wrong in your opinion? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It can be hard work to be fair.
I've been lucky enough to find what I've been looking for twice.
I'm now on the look out again. I think the trick is to stay relaxed because you never know who is just round the corner
You cant rush these things
Agreed, this is a frustrating place at the best of times haha. I'm in no rush just curious on people thought about finding more than fun on here.
Seems most are just looking to boost the egos or one off flings I
Is that wrong in your opinion? "
Not at all just not what I'm looking for |
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"It can be hard work to be fair.
I've been lucky enough to find what I've been looking for twice.
I'm now on the look out again. I think the trick is to stay relaxed because you never know who is just round the corner
You cant rush these things
Agreed, this is a frustrating place at the best of times haha. I'm in no rush just curious on people thought about finding more than fun on here.
Seems most are just looking to boost the egos or one off flings I
Is that wrong in your opinion?
Not at all just not what I'm looking for "
I think you stand as good a chance on here as anywhere to be honest. The problem is people tend to tell you what they think you want to hear which can lead you up the garden path sometimes |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It can be hard work to be fair.
I've been lucky enough to find what I've been looking for twice.
I'm now on the look out again. I think the trick is to stay relaxed because you never know who is just round the corner
You cant rush these things
Agreed, this is a frustrating place at the best of times haha. I'm in no rush just curious on people thought about finding more than fun on here.
Seems most are just looking to boost the egos or one off flings I
Is that wrong in your opinion?
Not at all just not what I'm looking for
I think you stand as good a chance on here as anywhere to be honest. The problem is people tend to tell you what they think you want to hear which can lead you up the garden path sometimes "
Absolutely, have to be true to your self and sometimes tell people want you dint want to find what you do |
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"It can be hard work to be fair.
I've been lucky enough to find what I've been looking for twice.
I'm now on the look out again. I think the trick is to stay relaxed because you never know who is just round the corner
You cant rush these things
Agreed, this is a frustrating place at the best of times haha. I'm in no rush just curious on people thought about finding more than fun on here.
Seems most are just looking to boost the egos or one off flings I
Is that wrong in your opinion?
Not at all just not what I'm looking for
I think you stand as good a chance on here as anywhere to be honest. The problem is people tend to tell you what they think you want to hear which can lead you up the garden path sometimes
Absolutely, have to be true to your self and sometimes tell people want you dint want to find what you do "
True.
We're both advocates of clarity from the start of any relationship. Much better to state from day one your non negotiable requirements but so many people don't, hoping that once you know them a little better you will overlook certain things. |
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