FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you let oppertunity slip past to find the perfect match?
Do you let oppertunity slip past to find the perfect match?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
I was watching a dating expert on utube and it was interesting, he said that many of us let oppertunity slip past us as we might walk past the perfect match everyday on the street he concluded that you should be brave and grab the moment to ask, what is your view of it? I agree with it but you could sometimes be to shy as well. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The thing is, in the real world you don’t know who is single and open to being approached. Unless you’re in a bar or on a night out it’s not really acceptable to approach people in public. Chances are people around my age group will be attached so it’s not about being brave enough to approach the fit guy you see in Tesco, like if I know the guy was single then I’d have no problem asking for his number. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think there's something to be said for accepting dates with people you might not normally go for but indiscriminately asking everyone who looks even partially suitable is a step too far. Being more open to talking to various people, going places and doing things you wouldn't normally do is more likely to be successful I'd say. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think there's something to be said for accepting dates with people you might not normally go for but indiscriminately asking everyone who looks even partially suitable is a step too far. Being more open to talking to various people, going places and doing things you wouldn't normally do is more likely to be successful I'd say."
Perfectly put. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think there's something to be said for accepting dates with people you might not normally go for but indiscriminately asking everyone who looks even partially suitable is a step too far. Being more open to talking to various people, going places and doing things you wouldn't normally do is more likely to be successful I'd say.
Perfectly put. "
Yes.
I do get approached in the street from time to time. I never consider their potential attractiveness, just how dangerous they might be when contemplating how to get rid of them. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think there's something to be said for accepting dates with people you might not normally go for but indiscriminately asking everyone who looks even partially suitable is a step too far. Being more open to talking to various people, going places and doing things you wouldn't normally do is more likely to be successful I'd say.
Perfectly put.
Yes.
I do get approached in the street from time to time. I never consider their potential attractiveness, just how dangerous they might be when contemplating how to get rid of them."
I
When I was younger and at college I was approached in the street a lot, probably three or four times a week. I know it's cliched but things felt different then, we had no other means of communication than face to face apart from a phone in the hall of our student accommodation. We'd chat at the bus stop or in the shop and give our number, the correct one if we liked them  , they'd ring, wait while someone found you and a date would be arranged. It just all seemed less frantic and sex focused
Nowadays I'd be much more wary as a young person |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
I’m open to dates, but i don’t go around asking for them. I like to be asked and not do the asking. So maybe i’ve missed out that way?
But then you can’t miss what you’ve never had. Can you? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I am pretty much always open to chat to strangers, but rarely open to being chatted up by them.
A friendly enough conversation in a queue or on public transport or even sharing a table in a cafe - all great.
I'm not looking for a relationship or to date, so a friendly conversation is as far as it would go, but in the past I've been a bit more open. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I tend to walk around with my eyes shut  . If someone likes me I’m oblivious to it."
This is prerry much me as well!
I have been told a few times by people that they used to fancy me but becaise I wasn't interested or reacting to their subtle hints they moved on!!
Had one lass I really like when I was younger admit this to me recently - felt like banging my head off the wall  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
This brings to mind the word "Sonder" which is the realisation that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own.
I try not to sexually objectify people I see on the street, that's why I'm on here. Striking up conversations with strangers however is another matter, it's something I'm trying to do a lot more in both my work life and personal life. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This brings to mind the word "Sonder" which is the realisation that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own.
I try not to sexually objectify people I see on the street, that's why I'm on here. Striking up conversations with strangers however is another matter, it's something I'm trying to do a lot more in both my work life and personal life. "
Do you find people resistant to this?
We do. That might be because we're weirdos of course but it seems that there's more suspicion of people now |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This brings to mind the word "Sonder" which is the realisation that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own.
I try not to sexually objectify people I see on the street, that's why I'm on here. Striking up conversations with strangers however is another matter, it's something I'm trying to do a lot more in both my work life and personal life.
Do you find people resistant to this?
We do. That might be because we're weirdos of course but it seems that there's more suspicion of people now"
Yes, I find that younger people are resistant to this (they'd rather give yiu their Instagram or kik and have you chat with them) , older people can't shut up .
As part of a leadership course at work I was encouraged to walk up to people and strike up conversations, in the work context people have to endure you so it's not that bad |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This brings to mind the word "Sonder" which is the realisation that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own.
I try not to sexually objectify people I see on the street, that's why I'm on here. Striking up conversations with strangers however is another matter, it's something I'm trying to do a lot more in both my work life and personal life.
Do you find people resistant to this?
We do. That might be because we're weirdos of course but it seems that there's more suspicion of people now
Yes, I find that younger people are resistant to this (they'd rather give yiu their Instagram or kik and have you chat with them) , older people can't shut up .
As part of a leadership course at work I was encouraged to walk up to people and strike up conversations, in the work context people have to endure you so it's not that bad"
I'm thinking of several occasions recently where I've approached people and they've been obviously unwilling to any and others where they've been really happy to chat. It's not really age related but I admit that I'd be unlikely to chat to a 25 year old man just randomly. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This brings to mind the word "Sonder" which is the realisation that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own.
I try not to sexually objectify people I see on the street, that's why I'm on here. Striking up conversations with strangers however is another matter, it's something I'm trying to do a lot more in both my work life and personal life.
Do you find people resistant to this?
We do. That might be because we're weirdos of course but it seems that there's more suspicion of people now"
Maybe it's a northern thing, or maybe I just have a very non-threatening demeanour, or maybe it's because I'm a woman rather than a man, but I chat to strangers a lot.
Last night I was trying on some shoes in Asda in the sale and got chatting to a bloke who was trying to find some slippers for his mum (he got her a great Harry Potter pair!), a woman who was looking for cheap sandals for a holiday to Greece in a couple of weeks and a woman who wanted the shoes I ended up buying.
On Sunday morning I go for coffee with my friend and I've ended up chatting to quite a variety of people who are also there regularly. It's turned into a bit of a social group and I bumped into one of the guys in a bar this week, where I had a drink with him and his friends.
If he'd walked up to me on the street and asked me to go for a drink with him I'd be resistant for sure, but I'm usually up for a chat. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'll chat to people in the street, do all the time. Northern thing.
As soon as it gets to me being pretty or attractive I begin plotting my escape."
Is that because you have decided to close off all potential interest not from fab or dating apps? Hence the OPs post. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'll chat to people in the street, do all the time. Northern thing.
As soon as it gets to me being pretty or attractive I begin plotting my escape.
Is that because you have decided to close off all potential interest not from fab or dating apps? Hence the OPs post. "
I've never had it go well and it's almost always creepy in the way it's carried out. Once (a hundred times) bitten, twice shy. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This brings to mind the word "Sonder" which is the realisation that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own.
I try not to sexually objectify people I see on the street, that's why I'm on here. Striking up conversations with strangers however is another matter, it's something I'm trying to do a lot more in both my work life and personal life.
Do you find people resistant to this?
We do. That might be because we're weirdos of course but it seems that there's more suspicion of people now
Maybe it's a northern thing, or maybe I just have a very non-threatening demeanour, or maybe it's because I'm a woman rather than a man, but I chat to strangers a lot.
Last night I was trying on some shoes in Asda in the sale and got chatting to a bloke who was trying to find some slippers for his mum (he got her a great Harry Potter pair!), a woman who was looking for cheap sandals for a holiday to Greece in a couple of weeks and a woman who wanted the shoes I ended up buying.
On Sunday morning I go for coffee with my friend and I've ended up chatting to quite a variety of people who are also there regularly. It's turned into a bit of a social group and I bumped into one of the guys in a bar this week, where I had a drink with him and his friends.
If he'd walked up to me on the street and asked me to go for a drink with him I'd be resistant for sure, but I'm usually up for a chat."
People quite often say it could be a northern thing. I don't know if it is or not but I don't think I'm threatening being a 5ft tall woman but I do sometimes meet with resistance even from other women. Could it be the evil glint in my eye and the axe behind my back ?  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
If I do chat to people in the street or supermarket or wherever they quickly bring a wife into the conversation, I must have a desperate air about me! Although I did get a wink from a man I asked about wine.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I was watching a dating expert on utube and it was interesting, he said that many of us let oppertunity slip past us as we might walk past the perfect match everyday on the street he concluded that you should be brave and grab the moment to ask, what is your view of it? I agree with it but you could sometimes be to shy as well."
I've heard of love at first sight, but for the most part I think it would take you to get to know someone before realising they were perfect for you. I do believe that if you have found someone that you think is perfect for you then you should be brave and show them you're intersted in them.
The other things is that too much too soon can be off putting so I believe theres a fine line between showing too much interest and not showing enough. You might scare them away if you come on too strong, you might make them lose interest by not coming on strong enough. Definitely be brave in the first instance though because you'll never know if you don't ask. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think there's something to be said for accepting dates with people you might not normally go for but indiscriminately asking everyone who looks even partially suitable is a step too far. Being more open to talking to various people, going places and doing things you wouldn't normally do is more likely to be successful I'd say.
Perfectly put.
Yes.
I do get approached in the street from time to time. I never consider their potential attractiveness, just how dangerous they might be when contemplating how to get rid of them.I
When I was younger and at college I was approached in the street a lot, probably three or four times a week. I know it's cliched but things felt different then, we had no other means of communication than face to face apart from a phone in the hall of our student accommodation. We'd chat at the bus stop or in the shop and give our number, the correct one if we liked them , they'd ring, wait while someone found you and a date would be arranged. It just all seemed less frantic and sex focused
Nowadays I'd be much more wary as a young person"
Do you wonder if it's because it WAS less sex focused? I do.
I get chatted up a fair amount at work, I hardly ever hear chaps say to their mates that they want to get to know me as a person or take me on a date, but I do hear them say they want to fuck me.
One day I may accept the offer, whilst donning sweaty work feet, a hairy balloon knot and the whiffiest disco minge known to man. That'll make them think twice
P |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think there's something to be said for accepting dates with people you might not normally go for but indiscriminately asking everyone who looks even partially suitable is a step too far. Being more open to talking to various people, going places and doing things you wouldn't normally do is more likely to be successful I'd say.
Perfectly put.
Yes.
I do get approached in the street from time to time. I never consider their potential attractiveness, just how dangerous they might be when contemplating how to get rid of them.I
When I was younger and at college I was approached in the street a lot, probably three or four times a week. I know it's cliched but things felt different then, we had no other means of communication than face to face apart from a phone in the hall of our student accommodation. We'd chat at the bus stop or in the shop and give our number, the correct one if we liked them , they'd ring, wait while someone found you and a date would be arranged. It just all seemed less frantic and sex focused
Nowadays I'd be much more wary as a young person
Do you wonder if it's because it WAS less sex focused? I do.
I get chatted up a fair amount at work, I hardly ever hear chaps say to their mates that they want to get to know me as a person or take me on a date, but I do hear them say they want to fuck me.
One day I may accept the offer, whilst donning sweaty work feet, a hairy balloon knot and the whiffiest disco minge known to man. That'll make them think twice
P"
,
Hairy balloon knot and disco minge 
The end goal was sex but it was less obvious possibly. I wonder if it was because it was a student city and there were so many young people |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"How would we ever know it's a perfect match just by walking past some stranger in the street...."
Yes, good point!
A while back I walked past a guy, couldn’t help checking him out and looking him up and down and he seemed to be doing the same. He complemented my hair and I complemented his tattoos, and then I carried on walking. I was kicking myself afterwards! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
