FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Is it rude.....?
Is it rude.....?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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To send a friend invite to a person/people you have not even messaged?
Does it warrant a polite but assertive response, or would you simply delete and block?
Not sure if I’m wasting my time or if it’s worth the effort explaining why the invite is about to be rejected...... Clarity on FAB mature etiquette requested - ta muchly  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I just assume its from people unaware of the usual way of doing it here. Loads of other social media you just befriend people at will. I dont take a lot of notice.
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To me it just seems pointless. And shows them our face pics. Whilst I'm all for using the flaws and features in the site to your advantage, I don't see how that's ever the right way to go about it. Why on earth wouldn't you send a message or a wink? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've seen someone put a disclaimer on their profile that if you send them a friend request without speaking first they will accept, perv all your pics then delete the freindship and block you during the night  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We don't accept unsolicited requests.. But we don't delete them or block. A quick message for then to read our profile. If you don't delete the friends request then they can't send another |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have on the profile no friends TIL a social and if one comes through they have not read our profile so it just gets deleted.
Op you can’t please all of the people all of the time so just dance to the beat of your own drum not others.
T |
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"To send a friend invite to a person/people you have not even messaged?
Does it warrant a polite but assertive response, or would you simply delete and block?
Not sure if I’m wasting my time or if it’s worth the effort explaining why the invite is about to be rejected...... Clarity on FAB mature etiquette requested - ta muchly "
I judge depends on the profile really, some
people don’t share photos public and sending a friend invite is kind a way of ‘hey look at us and if interested get back to us’ but if they have enough info on their profile and still sending an invite without a message I simply delete it |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
"To send a friend invite to a person/people you have not even messaged?
Does it warrant a polite but assertive response, or would you simply delete and block?
Not sure if I’m wasting my time or if it’s worth the effort explaining why the invite is about to be rejected...... Clarity on FAB mature etiquette requested - ta muchly "
Clearly shows a lack of tact on part of the person sending the request. |
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I did have friends only photos but put them in private to see if I'd still get unsolicited friend requests, doesn't seem to have made any difference to the amount.
I don't delete friend requests, that way they can't resend. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I just leave it there for a while as they can’t send another one while it is there and forget about it, until at some stage I delete all the old friend requests. I’ve never been requested twice. |
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Rudeness is very subjective.
Just because one person thinks something is rude, doesn't mean another does.
If you find it rude then don't accept it.
Whether you explain or not will depend on if the person is a total stranger or someone you have communicated with.
Maybe they use the 'friend' system as 'potential meet' or 'someone I liked chatting to' rather than the dictionary definition of the word.
Only you can decide. |
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"What's a friend invite? 
That number that goes up on the left side of the screen and you bulk delete periodically"
Noooo never go in there and never delete. If I delete they can resend.
When the conversation goes well I ask if I can send one  |
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"What's a friend invite?
That number that goes up on the left side of the screen and you bulk delete periodically
Noooo never go in there and never delete. If I delete they can resend.
When the conversation goes well I ask if I can send one "
I click on it to make the number go away and delete every 3-6 months lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t delete the invite. I just ignore it.
If you delete it, the person can resend. If you ignore it, the system won’t allow them to send another.
I wouldn’t block the person, different people use the site in different ways |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've seen someone put a disclaimer on their profile that if you send them a friend request without speaking first they will accept, perv all your pics then delete the freindship and block you during the night "
Harsh - I like it - haha |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Friend invites without any messaging chat first just get ignored or deleted. I assume they're just wanting to perv at friend only pics.
"
That’s exactly what I assume by it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's a chancers tactic to get private pics.
Wink them if you fancy them or block if you dislike their approach. Make them work for anything "
Thanks - at least I know I approach isn’t too OTT |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I did have friends only photos but put them in private to see if I'd still get unsolicited friend requests, doesn't seem to have made any difference to the amount.
I don't delete friend requests, that way they can't resend."
Good tip - thanks |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks for input everybody.
Everybody will have different reasons for doing this from naivety, to greedy/curiosity to see a bit more of our yummy selves (haha), to laziness.
People can learn for themselves - just like we all have.
I sent a polite message and got an apology back.
They still didn’t title the message, Zebra, Dog, Elephant or Ant Eater so clearers never made an attempt to read our profile.
Have a great weekend |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t delete the invite. I just ignore it.
If you delete it, the person can resend. If you ignore it, the system won’t allow them to send another.
I wouldn’t block the person, different people use the site in different ways "
It says on my profile that if we haven't had a conversation, recently, they will be blocked.. So just fishes out those that don't read profiles so they know what I am doing here |
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I'd be very unlikely to be cutting someone who did that a lot of slack OP. Even if they just don't get the site etiquette they'd surely not do that if they had an ounce of thought , even if they were well meaning. It suggests they might not be the most considerate going forward - not that it's ever happened to me - highly unlikely being a single guy, so I'm only saying in theory. Just my opinion obviously. |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
Leave them there, one thing from messages you get is a feel for the balance of the couple.
There are a lot where although it is a genuine couple the messaging is just the guy.
We had message ping pong with a long standing well verified couple a few nights ago, after three general messages we get hit with the friend request & “So can we meet?”
“So you’ve read our profile then?”
“Yes of course, can we meet?”
“Huh huh, Well your Mrs looks nice we can meet her?”
“We don’t play alone!”
“Funny, we don’t play with couples if you’d read the damn profile you’d know that, see ya”..
Madness that someone will chat on a few messages but refuses point blank or lies when you ask them to spend two frikkin minutes reading a profile?
How the fuck do these people get meets?
S |
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"Leave them there, one thing from messages you get is a feel for the balance of the couple.
There are a lot where although it is a genuine couple the messaging is just the guy.
We had message ping pong with a long standing well verified couple a few nights ago, after three general messages we get hit with the friend request & “So can we meet?”
“So you’ve read our profile then?”
“Yes of course, can we meet?”
“Huh huh, Well your Mrs looks nice we can meet her?”
“We don’t play alone!”
“Funny, we don’t play with couples if you’d read the damn profile you’d know that, see ya”..
Madness that someone will chat on a few messages but refuses point blank or lies when you ask them to spend two frikkin minutes reading a profile?
How the fuck do these people get meets?
S"
Brilliant lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Leave them there, one thing from messages you get is a feel for the balance of the couple.
There are a lot where although it is a genuine couple the messaging is just the guy.
We had message ping pong with a long standing well verified couple a few nights ago, after three general messages we get hit with the friend request & “So can we meet?”
“So you’ve read our profile then?”
“Yes of course, can we meet?”
“Huh huh, Well your Mrs looks nice we can meet her?”
“We don’t play alone!”
“Funny, we don’t play with couples if you’d read the damn profile you’d know that, see ya”..
Madness that someone will chat on a few messages but refuses point blank or lies when you ask them to spend two frikkin minutes reading a profile?
How the fuck do these people get meets?
S
Brilliant lol"
Absobloodylutly - nothing between the ears  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'd be very unlikely to be cutting someone who did that a lot of slack OP. Even if they just don't get the site etiquette they'd surely not do that if they had an ounce of thought , even if they were well meaning. It suggests they might not be the most considerate going forward - not that it's ever happened to me - highly unlikely being a single guy, so I'm only saying in theory. Just my opinion obviously. "
And I share you’re opinion completely |
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