FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Mental health: first aid, self help
Jump to: Newest in thread
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I have found exercise to be an excellent way to deal with mental illness. It is difficult to actually get out there and do it, but running for example saved me from many a crises in the last 2.5 years..." Absolutely. It's made such a difference to me. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Need this today! Having an unexpected anxiety day. " Deep breaths. Mindfulness if you know it. Distraction. You've got this x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Need this today! Having an unexpected anxiety day. Deep breaths. Mindfulness if you know it. Distraction. You've got this x" Thank you X I'm going to settle down with some reading and colouring and Buffy before I go to work this evening. Realistically I'm fine - it's pay day so I don't have money to worry about and I have a nice night away to look forward to on Monday. But going into town this morning was a bit brutal. And the heartburn. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Does anyone else get really really really FED UP when they don't have a reason for their mental health being a bit shit? Like I'd be more happy if I had a reason for feeling anxious today cos then I could try to explain it to someone. But instead I don't know why I feel like this. Like I'm overthinking everything I do in case it backfires or it goes wrong." For me there's always a reason. Maybe you, too. Our brains are wired to detect danger (I'm speaking to my anxiety). If we've suffered a lot of danger in the past, particularly unresolved, unresolvable, and/or without clear support at the time, our brains upgrade their alarm systems, because better a false alarm than destruction of self (death or deep trauma). Your brain is trying to protect you. It might be wrong, you might know it's wrong, but it's doing the best it can to save your life. And treating that process with compassion - yes, it's fucking irritating - stops some of the cycle of getting anxious about your anxiety. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Does anyone else get really really really FED UP when they don't have a reason for their mental health being a bit shit? Like I'd be more happy if I had a reason for feeling anxious today cos then I could try to explain it to someone. But instead I don't know why I feel like this. Like I'm overthinking everything I do in case it backfires or it goes wrong." Yep on the face of it I have everything good going for me. Yet the darkness of my past follows me. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Does anyone else get really really really FED UP when they don't have a reason for their mental health being a bit shit? Like I'd be more happy if I had a reason for feeling anxious today cos then I could try to explain it to someone. But instead I don't know why I feel like this. Like I'm overthinking everything I do in case it backfires or it goes wrong." For me it’s been lots of small things, but when you stack lots of small things quite high they have a tendency to topple over. The hardest part is taking note of the first wobble, then trying to stop the stack growing. There is lots of positives in what you’re writing so that’s a really good thing. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Evidence shows having others to talk with uncritically, exercise, reducing and managing stress levels, spending time with nature and knowing and having a plan, should things deteriorate, are amongst the things that will help and support you. Your GP is an important contact, who can also assess you independently and professionally, potentially referring you to other services, where appropriate. Don't be self-critical, stop it, as it's undermining and replace anything else that you do which is knocking you, with something else which is more nourishing and positive. Be your own best friend, though secure the support of good friends too " Your posts really are fantastic. I do all the above and also practise mindfulness - it's not for everyone but it really helps me stop, think and put things in perspective before I spiral into overthinking anxiety. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Evidence shows having others to talk with uncritically, exercise, reducing and managing stress levels, spending time with nature and knowing and having a plan, should things deteriorate, are amongst the things that will help and support you. Your GP is an important contact, who can also assess you independently and professionally, potentially referring you to other services, where appropriate. Don't be self-critical, stop it, as it's undermining and replace anything else that you do which is knocking you, with something else which is more nourishing and positive. Be your own best friend, though secure the support of good friends too " Wonderful post. Very nicely put. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Does anyone else get really really really FED UP when they don't have a reason for their mental health being a bit shit? Like I'd be more happy if I had a reason for feeling anxious today cos then I could try to explain it to someone. But instead I don't know why I feel like this. Like I'm overthinking everything I do in case it backfires or it goes wrong." Exactly this. I love riding my bike and running. But sometimes I can feel the anxiety building up because I'm going for a ride. Then I get frustrated with myself for being silly. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Does anyone else get really really really FED UP when they don't have a reason for their mental health being a bit shit? Like I'd be more happy if I had a reason for feeling anxious today cos then I could try to explain it to someone. But instead I don't know why I feel like this. Like I'm overthinking everything I do in case it backfires or it goes wrong. Exactly this. I love riding my bike and running. But sometimes I can feel the anxiety building up because I'm going for a ride. Then I get frustrated with myself for being silly. " For me differentiating between anxiety/fear, other adrenaline (sex for example), and exertion, really helps. Might be worth examining the physical sensations and disconnecting them, if that makes sense. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Does anyone else get really really really FED UP when they don't have a reason for their mental health being a bit shit? Like I'd be more happy if I had a reason for feeling anxious today cos then I could try to explain it to someone. But instead I don't know why I feel like this. Like I'm overthinking everything I do in case it backfires or it goes wrong. For me there's always a reason. Maybe you, too. Our brains are wired to detect danger (I'm speaking to my anxiety). If we've suffered a lot of danger in the past, particularly unresolved, unresolvable, and/or without clear support at the time, our brains upgrade their alarm systems, because better a false alarm than destruction of self (death or deep trauma). Your brain is trying to protect you. It might be wrong, you might know it's wrong, but it's doing the best it can to save your life. And treating that process with compassion - yes, it's fucking irritating - stops some of the cycle of getting anxious about your anxiety. " Wow. Yeah that describes it perfectly actually. Also much love to all the other replies to my comment. Really helps sometimes when you know you're not alone. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Hope it helps " It does. I went through counselling last year and learnt a hell of a lot about my brain and why it works like it does. Constant learning process. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Does anyone else get really really really FED UP when they don't have a reason for their mental health being a bit shit? Like I'd be more happy if I had a reason for feeling anxious today cos then I could try to explain it to someone. But instead I don't know why I feel like this. Like I'm overthinking everything I do in case it backfires or it goes wrong. Exactly this. I love riding my bike and running. But sometimes I can feel the anxiety building up because I'm going for a ride. Then I get frustrated with myself for being silly. For me differentiating between anxiety/fear, other adrenaline (sex for example), and exertion, really helps. Might be worth examining the physical sensations and disconnecting them, if that makes sense. " I will give that a try, thanks | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Does anyone else get really really really FED UP when they don't have a reason for their mental health being a bit shit? Like I'd be more happy if I had a reason for feeling anxious today cos then I could try to explain it to someone. But instead I don't know why I feel like this. Like I'm overthinking everything I do in case it backfires or it goes wrong." over thinking is the worst ... Do I do this/ that ... Shall I say this / that .. do they like me .. are they talking about me.. everyone on this chat has their own demons .. myself included .. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"After a very angry childhood I learnt how to control and suppress my angriness I no longer get angry I do get annoyed so I just applied that technique to any unwanted feelings I have this is not easy and certainly not for everyone but it does work for me" It's so different for all of us. Sometimes in ways that are gendered. I wasn't safe to get angry when I was a child. So it became anxiety and self loathing. I've had to learn how to get angry safely. It's protective. Not everything is my fault (some things are! That hasn't changed! But I can reflect and not just beat myself up) I have worth, I am worthwhile, that's worth defending. I feel my anger in response to that. It's fucking liberating. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"After a very angry childhood I learnt how to control and suppress my angriness I no longer get angry I do get annoyed so I just applied that technique to any unwanted feelings I have this is not easy and certainly not for everyone but it does work for me It's so different for all of us. Sometimes in ways that are gendered. I wasn't safe to get angry when I was a child. So it became anxiety and self loathing. I've had to learn how to get angry safely. It's protective. Not everything is my fault (some things are! That hasn't changed! But I can reflect and not just beat myself up) I have worth, I am worthwhile, that's worth defending. I feel my anger in response to that. It's fucking liberating. " We all have our own ways of dealing with things I am generally a happy person and enjoy life I have the attitude that if you don't like me that is your problem not mine those that are closest to me can freely say if I'm being an ass whole if I agree with them i will change to be a better person but when it comes to anger I don't really want to get too deep on here ear but the last time I got angry it took five men to hold me down and an ambulance to sedate me I wasn't sedated however it did take a long time for me to stop wanting to kill this particular person so I control my anger and any outher emotions that will trigger A lot of people say it is not healthy the way I deal with things but it does work for me life is too short to be angry at somebody that doesn't matter or angry in the first place | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Tough one, professional wise I hate how some people prescribe antidepressants of the bat without consideration, I don’t believe in that method. Rather get to know somebody’s routine, find out a little more about them & where a trigger point could be seen. I had a sad phone call yesterday, from a patients family member informing me someone on there street committed, an she was having dark thoughts. To find out the actual person who committed was a person I knew from school, had a family & kids and what not. Professionally I had to put a front on, inside I was heartbroken. Such a lovely person gone so soon, I often try & tell people when they are suffering from any sort of mental health issues most important things are having STRUCTURE & someone to TALK to. Whomever it may be, you aren’t alone. People will listen & to the people listening, please be patient, please be considerate. " But what if there is no one to reach out too ? The meds aren’t helping | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"January often sucks. Mental health issues can be exacerbated. Depression, anxiety, and other issues. Let's talk how to pull ourselves up. " Exercise Learn something new -a skill or subject. Be outside Make plans When i was depressed it was horrendous and i look back and it scares me the idea of going back there. Im not sure it was anything more than time in the end though | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Tough one, professional wise I hate how some people prescribe antidepressants of the bat without consideration, I don’t believe in that method. " In an ideal world we'd all have access to decent psychological help. We don't. Anti-depressants have saved many people, certainly the only reason I'm still here. "I often try & tell people when they are suffering from any sort of mental health issues most important things are having STRUCTURE & someone to TALK to. " When I'm at my worst I'd just find that patronising and unhelpful. " Whomever it may be, you aren’t alone. People will listen & to the people listening, please be patient, please be considerate. " We are all alone. You can never be in someone else's mind and feel their pain. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"We all have bad days. I have GADD so I expect them now! I cope by focussing on good things to come, plan things that will make me happy, put music on loud and sing & dance, try to stop my brain from overthinking and going into hyperdrive. Time spent with friends is always good. But for me, having things to look forward to is vital. " Having a list of coping mechanisms is vital, isn't it? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Walking I find helps to clear your mind,especially taking the dogs. Any exercise helps but I don’t go setting myself targets just in case something comes up. But a simple walk in the fresh air can make you feel so much better " When I know I've got the time for the gym, I absolutely set myself targets. Must get through this set. Focus on the strain in the muscles. Etc. To each their own of course | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Walking I find helps to clear your mind,especially taking the dogs. Any exercise helps but I don’t go setting myself targets just in case something comes up. But a simple walk in the fresh air can make you feel so much better When I know I've got the time for the gym, I absolutely set myself targets. Must get through this set. Focus on the strain in the muscles. Etc. To each their own of course " I agree with those targets,if you go to the gym then definitely set them. Feels so good when you hit them. I was more along the lines of I don’t say I’m going there at least four times a week in case something comes up and I then beat myself up over it. I take the dogs out daily and after a bath feel so much better. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Walking I find helps to clear your mind,especially taking the dogs. Any exercise helps but I don’t go setting myself targets just in case something comes up. But a simple walk in the fresh air can make you feel so much better When I know I've got the time for the gym, I absolutely set myself targets. Must get through this set. Focus on the strain in the muscles. Etc. To each their own of course I agree with those targets,if you go to the gym then definitely set them. Feels so good when you hit them. I was more along the lines of I don’t say I’m going there at least four times a week in case something comes up and I then beat myself up over it. I take the dogs out daily and after a bath feel so much better. " Definitely. Do what you can do and get what you can from it. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"There’s a lot of good advice on here off some nice people on forums. Always good to know it’s not the stigma it used to be " Anyone who judges you for your psychological struggles can piss off. It's 2020, psychological issues are real and can be debilitating, and those who refuse to accept that need to do much better. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I’ll freely admit I’ve struggled with mental health and been suicidal at times. Things are better at the moment. I’m another one who is a fan of exercise - makes a massive difference to my sense of well-being. I’m happiest on top of a mountain (or in bed with a nice woman, but that’s a rarity ). " If you put a mattress on the mountain next time you get lucky you can kill two birds with one stone then! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I’ll freely admit I’ve struggled with mental health and been suicidal at times. Things are better at the moment. I’m another one who is a fan of exercise - makes a massive difference to my sense of well-being. I’m happiest on top of a mountain (or in bed with a nice woman, but that’s a rarity ). If you put a mattress on the mountain next time you get lucky you can kill two birds with one stone then! " Ha ha - that’s pretty much my dream scenario | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I am a mental health first aider, yes it’s a thing trained recently. Through the MHFA, if I can ever help anyone if the need an offload, will listen, genuine offer, check out the ALGEE approach it is so simple and you can always use it on someone you know who may need it. It’s ok not to be ok, remember. Xx" I had no idea this was a thing | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I am a mental health first aider, yes it’s a thing trained recently. Through the MHFA, if I can ever help anyone if the need an offload, will listen, genuine offer, check out the ALGEE approach it is so simple and you can always use it on someone you know who may need it. It’s ok not to be ok, remember. Xx" We've introduced this at work. Because I'm not a first aider I can't do the training. So our 2 mental health first aiders, 1 is toxic and the other is old school 'man up' attitude to mental health. It's a massive opportunity lost as far as I'm concerned | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I am a mental health first aider, yes it’s a thing trained recently. Through the MHFA, if I can ever help anyone if the need an offload, will listen, genuine offer, check out the ALGEE approach it is so simple and you can always use it on someone you know who may need it. It’s ok not to be ok, remember. Xx We've introduced this at work. Because I'm not a first aider I can't do the training. So our 2 mental health first aiders, 1 is toxic and the other is old school 'man up' attitude to mental health. It's a massive opportunity lost as far as I'm concerned " ‘Man up’. I hate that saying with a passion | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Great thread OP. However I think some times you can feel so low that you can just look at it all and it all just becomes text. A lot of it takes effort and when you feel that bad it's hard to have the effort to even function. But it's ideal when someone is either just starting feeling that way or coming out the other side. " I know. But it's better to talk about it than not. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I am a mental health first aider, yes it’s a thing trained recently. Through the MHFA, if I can ever help anyone if the need an offload, will listen, genuine offer, check out the ALGEE approach it is so simple and you can always use it on someone you know who may need it. It’s ok not to be ok, remember. Xx We've introduced this at work. Because I'm not a first aider I can't do the training. So our 2 mental health first aiders, 1 is toxic and the other is old school 'man up' attitude to mental health. It's a massive opportunity lost as far as I'm concerned ‘Man up’. I hate that saying with a passion " That is so wrong for them people to be chosen to do this......worst thing you can say is man up, it’s pathetic and narrow Minded of people to do so. Often bought on by some of their own experiences. It’s important not to judge, just listen and help if you can. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Great thread OP. However I think some times you can feel so low that you can just look at it all and it all just becomes text. A lot of it takes effort and when you feel that bad it's hard to have the effort to even function. But it's ideal when someone is either just starting feeling that way or coming out the other side. I know. But it's better to talk about it than not. " Sorry it wasn't meant to put a negative on the thread | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Great thread OP. However I think some times you can feel so low that you can just look at it all and it all just becomes text. A lot of it takes effort and when you feel that bad it's hard to have the effort to even function. But it's ideal when someone is either just starting feeling that way or coming out the other side. I know. But it's better to talk about it than not. Sorry it wasn't meant to put a negative on the thread" Oh no. Let's tackle it as best we can, if we can. It's hard x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I can pull myself up. It’s someone else I need to pull up. " I hear you. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I am a mental health first aider, yes it’s a thing trained recently. Through the MHFA, if I can ever help anyone if the need an offload, will listen, genuine offer, check out the ALGEE approach it is so simple and you can always use it on someone you know who may need it. It’s ok not to be ok, remember. Xx We've introduced this at work. Because I'm not a first aider I can't do the training. So our 2 mental health first aiders, 1 is toxic and the other is old school 'man up' attitude to mental health. It's a massive opportunity lost as far as I'm concerned ‘Man up’. I hate that saying with a passion That is so wrong for them people to be chosen to do this......worst thing you can say is man up, it’s pathetic and narrow Minded of people to do so. Often bought on by some of their own experiences. It’s important not to judge, just listen and help if you can. " It's something I will challenge at some point as I'm involved in a wellness group, my hope is that they've offered it to first aiders first and will open it up across the work force at some point. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I've had a lot of therapy and have survived numerous suicide attempts. Depression, anxiety, trauma (sort of PTSD), other issues. It's fucking tough. And it's a lifelong battle. I am a survivor. I keep fighting. " My sister is very high up in mental health in Liverpool and her husband is head of safety in altcourse prison. Both have given me support but I find they are numb sometimes, and they don’t see me as a person. , | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I am a mental health first aider, yes it’s a thing trained recently. Through the MHFA, if I can ever help anyone if the need an offload, will listen, genuine offer, check out the ALGEE approach it is so simple and you can always use it on someone you know who may need it. It’s ok not to be ok, remember. Xx We've introduced this at work. Because I'm not a first aider I can't do the training. So our 2 mental health first aiders, 1 is toxic and the other is old school 'man up' attitude to mental health. It's a massive opportunity lost as far as I'm concerned ‘Man up’. I hate that saying with a passion That is so wrong for them people to be chosen to do this......worst thing you can say is man up, it’s pathetic and narrow Minded of people to do so. Often bought on by some of their own experiences. It’s important not to judge, just listen and help if you can. It's something I will challenge at some point as I'm involved in a wellness group, my hope is that they've offered it to first aiders first and will open it up across the work force at some point. " If I can help mate I will. Can’t make any guarantees but will try. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I hate January. It is grey, dark, exhausting and depressing. The worst time of year for me. I want to hibernate. Sleep all the time. To hide away. I take annual leave from work. And the next person who advises me to exercise, get outdoors, practice mindfulness etc will have it shoved up their arse." I think there's a line. These things can help. I advise similarly because it has helped me. For whatever it's worth, and I appreciate your journey is not mine and the answers may be different for you. But people who think it's a panacea, that it always works, that you don't need anything else, that you haven't worked hard enough on your illness... They can go to hell. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I hate January. It is grey, dark, exhausting and depressing. The worst time of year for me. I want to hibernate. Sleep all the time. To hide away. I take annual leave from work. And the next person who advises me to exercise, get outdoors, practice mindfulness etc will have it shoved up their arse." This | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I hate January. It is grey, dark, exhausting and depressing. The worst time of year for me. I want to hibernate. Sleep all the time. To hide away. I take annual leave from work. And the next person who advises me to exercise, get outdoors, practice mindfulness etc will have it shoved up their arse." This xx | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I hate January. It is grey, dark, exhausting and depressing. The worst time of year for me. I want to hibernate. Sleep all the time. To hide away. I take annual leave from work. And the next person who advises me to exercise, get outdoors, practice mindfulness etc will have it shoved up their arse." It's kind of how I feel at the moment I'm in a real low place and I'm having tests due to health issues, on top of that me and beast have fallen out just when I need the support. No amount of exercise or mindfulness is going to help fix my issues. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I hate January. It is grey, dark, exhausting and depressing. The worst time of year for me. I want to hibernate. Sleep all the time. To hide away. I take annual leave from work. And the next person who advises me to exercise, get outdoors, practice mindfulness etc will have it shoved up their arse. It's kind of how I feel at the moment I'm in a real low place and I'm having tests due to health issues, on top of that me and beast have fallen out just when I need the support. No amount of exercise or mindfulness is going to help fix my issues. " When your low your low, I self harm and I know I shouldn’t but I can’t help it. But when people say “ oh you’ve a lovely house” or “ your kids are a credit “. Doesn’t help when I absolutely hate myself and feel awful | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Fantastic thread to read and everybody should be so proud of themselves of being aware of this subject matter..... Just talk people...... seek help, if you have toothache you tell someone.... if you feel down or anxious it is simply the same, please please talk to someone, do not suffer alone..." Agree, it's a great thread and definitely something that needs more awareness raised. I'm a big believer in raising awareness and making sure people know thats it okay to not be okay. I say all this but I'm my own worst enemy. I will move heaven and earth to help friends, family and anyone that needs it. But I can't take my own advice when it comes to my own mental health and find it a lot easier to suffer alone. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I've had a REALLY bad week... Been to the gym for a couple of hours to pound it out tonight and then sat in the sauna /steam room for a bit, thinking things through. Talked to my mum, and actually was one of our best conversations I feel absolutely flat / empty.. And I tend to make really bad decisions when I'm empty.. Hmmm Getting my hair cut tomorrow, visiting a friend and then dancing in the evening. Gym again on sunday... Might bake too.. I like to cook, keeps me occupied.. Busy is good " Sounds like a perfect weekend, enjoy! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Fantastic thread to read and everybody should be so proud of themselves of being aware of this subject matter..... Just talk people...... seek help, if you have toothache you tell someone.... if you feel down or anxious it is simply the same, please please talk to someone, do not suffer alone... Agree, it's a great thread and definitely something that needs more awareness raised. I'm a big believer in raising awareness and making sure people know thats it okay to not be okay. I say all this but I'm my own worst enemy. I will move heaven and earth to help friends, family and anyone that needs it. But I can't take my own advice when it comes to my own mental health and find it a lot easier to suffer alone. " Snap I’m the same, I always have been since I was little. X | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I've had a REALLY bad week... Been to the gym for a couple of hours to pound it out tonight and then sat in the sauna /steam room for a bit, thinking things through. Talked to my mum, and actually was one of our best conversations I feel absolutely flat / empty.. And I tend to make really bad decisions when I'm empty.. Hmmm Getting my hair cut tomorrow, visiting a friend and then dancing in the evening. Gym again on sunday... Might bake too.. I like to cook, keeps me occupied.. Busy is good " That’s exactly it! Distraction is key and that’s why I go to the gym. I’ve had a hard couple of months and have probably dwelled on it too much but any distraction is a good distraction. I’ve been reading novels and that’s a great help too. Going away for a couple of weeks soon which might be a rash decision but again, it’s something different and won’t do any harm. I believe shit sorts itself out in the end and maintaining a positive mental approach is vital. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I hate January. It is grey, dark, exhausting and depressing. The worst time of year for me. I want to hibernate. Sleep all the time. To hide away. I take annual leave from work. And the next person who advises me to exercise, get outdoors, practice mindfulness etc will have it shoved up their arse. It's kind of how I feel at the moment I'm in a real low place and I'm having tests due to health issues, on top of that me and beast have fallen out just when I need the support. No amount of exercise or mindfulness is going to help fix my issues. When your low your low, I self harm and I know I shouldn’t but I can’t help it. But when people say “ oh you’ve a lovely house” or “ your kids are a credit “. Doesn’t help when I absolutely hate myself and feel awful " ! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Fantastic thread to read and everybody should be so proud of themselves of being aware of this subject matter..... Just talk people...... seek help, if you have toothache you tell someone.... if you feel down or anxious it is simply the same, please please talk to someone, do not suffer alone... Agree, it's a great thread and definitely something that needs more awareness raised. I'm a big believer in raising awareness and making sure people know thats it okay to not be okay. I say all this but I'm my own worst enemy. I will move heaven and earth to help friends, family and anyone that needs it. But I can't take my own advice when it comes to my own mental health and find it a lot easier to suffer alone. Snap I’m the same, I always have been since I was little. X " Inbox can be opened if you ever want a chat xx | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Fantastic thread to read and everybody should be so proud of themselves of being aware of this subject matter..... Just talk people...... seek help, if you have toothache you tell someone.... if you feel down or anxious it is simply the same, please please talk to someone, do not suffer alone... Agree, it's a great thread and definitely something that needs more awareness raised. I'm a big believer in raising awareness and making sure people know thats it okay to not be okay. I say all this but I'm my own worst enemy. I will move heaven and earth to help friends, family and anyone that needs it. But I can't take my own advice when it comes to my own mental health and find it a lot easier to suffer alone. Snap I’m the same, I always have been since I was little. X Inbox can be opened if you ever want a chat xx" Thank you x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I hate January. It is grey, dark, exhausting and depressing. The worst time of year for me. I want to hibernate. Sleep all the time. To hide away. I take annual leave from work. And the next person who advises me to exercise, get outdoors, practice mindfulness etc will have it shoved up their arse. I think there's a line. These things can help. I advise similarly because it has helped me. For whatever it's worth, and I appreciate your journey is not mine and the answers may be different for you. But people who think it's a panacea, that it always works, that you don't need anything else, that you haven't worked hard enough on your illness... They can go to hell. " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Funny isn’t it ive said a few times now how I’ve struggled with Mental health, I’ve actually said twice about self harm and not one person replies. Yet what when a person who is popular even on here posts there’s lots of replies!!!! OMG go Hope your ok are you ok? Omg I’m with you babe. Read back even on this thread " Sorry you feel you got missed. Try not to take it personally there's lots of good advice and support here aimed at everyone. And probably a few other unacknowledged comments as there always are. I've just joined, I spotted you. Sending love x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Funny isn’t it ive said a few times now how I’ve struggled with Mental health, I’ve actually said twice about self harm and not one person replies. Yet what when a person who is popular even on here posts there’s lots of replies!!!! OMG go Hope your ok are you ok? Omg I’m with you babe. Read back even on this thread Sorry you feel you got missed. Try not to take it personally there's lots of good advice and support here aimed at everyone. And probably a few other unacknowledged comments as there always are. I've just joined, I spotted you. Sending love x " Thank you, I do feel there’s a really big gap on here sometimes (clique) and it’s very sad, some people will pawn themselves over others and be all “ awww hope your ok your such a nice person blah blah” any one else is Sometimes ignored. I send my love and support out to anyone going through mental health and my doors always open x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I've had a REALLY bad week... Been to the gym for a couple of hours to pound it out tonight and then sat in the sauna /steam room for a bit, thinking things through. Talked to my mum, and actually was one of our best conversations I feel absolutely flat / empty.. And I tend to make really bad decisions when I'm empty.. Hmmm Getting my hair cut tomorrow, visiting a friend and then dancing in the evening. Gym again on sunday... Might bake too.. I like to cook, keeps me occupied.. Busy is good " I find having plans helps, being lonely and at a loose end doesn’t help | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Hi I’m lisa and I’m not feeling good and I need help " If you need to talk I’ll listen, genuinely x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Take your medication. Do not over think things. Try to think positive. Remember that you got through yesterday. You will get through today and you will get through tomorrow." I’ve heard that somewhere!! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Iv done a "living skills" course. I would highly recommend that to everyone to be honest. So the idea behind it is to give you skills,tools and techniques to manage when life gets through and also to deal with difficult emotions. I'm currently doing a DBT it's very intense but game changing. " I’ve done this also. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Iv done a "living skills" course. I would highly recommend that to everyone to be honest. So the idea behind it is to give you skills,tools and techniques to manage when life gets through and also to deal with difficult emotions. I'm currently doing a DBT it's very intense but game changing. I’ve done this also. " What is DBT | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Iv done a "living skills" course. I would highly recommend that to everyone to be honest. So the idea behind it is to give you skills,tools and techniques to manage when life gets through and also to deal with difficult emotions. I'm currently doing a DBT it's very intense but game changing. I’ve done this also. " It's hard isn't it! Like I said very helpful but soooo intense. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Iv done a "living skills" course. I would highly recommend that to everyone to be honest. So the idea behind it is to give you skills,tools and techniques to manage when life gets through and also to deal with difficult emotions. I'm currently doing a DBT it's very intense but game changing. I’ve done this also. " But you will probably side swipe my comment as for some reason you always do , don’t know why. Im very involved in mental health and I know my stuff , | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Iv done a "living skills" course. I would highly recommend that to everyone to be honest. So the idea behind it is to give you skills,tools and techniques to manage when life gets through and also to deal with difficult emotions. I'm currently doing a DBT it's very intense but game changing. I’ve done this also. What is DBT" dialectical behaviour therapy. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Iv done a "living skills" course. I would highly recommend that to everyone to be honest. So the idea behind it is to give you skills,tools and techniques to manage when life gets through and also to deal with difficult emotions. I'm currently doing a DBT it's very intense but game changing. I’ve done this also. But you will probably side swipe my comment as for some reason you always do , don’t know why. Im very involved in mental health and I know my stuff , " There wes no need for that. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Iv done a "living skills" course. I would highly recommend that to everyone to be honest. So the idea behind it is to give you skills,tools and techniques to manage when life gets through and also to deal with difficult emotions. I'm currently doing a DBT it's very intense but game changing. behavioral therapy. Its main goals are to teach people how to live in the moment and not in past I’ve done this also. What is DBT" | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Come now girls no fighting Oh wait what am i saying cat fiiiiiiight " I thought this was a thread about support. None of these last couple of posts seem very supportive. Iv put myself out there to try and help others. I won't bother anymore as it's not worth the hassle. I won't be posting again. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Come now girls no fighting Oh wait what am i saying cat fiiiiiiight I thought this was a thread about support. None of these last couple of posts seem very supportive. Iv put myself out there to try and help others. I won't bother anymore as it's not worth the hassle. I won't be posting again. " woah woah woah crikey its a joke to break tension settle down | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"January often sucks. Mental health issues can be exacerbated. Depression, anxiety, and other issues. Let's talk how to pull ourselves up. " I don’t often get anything like that. I did some years ago but the solution was to join Fab. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Thanks for post OP. Some helpful bits. I tried to take my life last year but failed at that. Ive been to scared to ask for help but i may now. " Please speak with someone, they help , your GP WILL HELP you. If you think your gp won’t help please get in touch, I will point you in the right direction | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"These threads are about support and having a safe space to post your thoughts; not everyone gets a response and do you know what? Yes it can feel a bit crappy especially when you've been a bit vulnerable and are talking about something like mental health - it's a highly emotive subject. When I've posted previously and not had one it does slight a little. But not getting a response doesn't mean that your contribution isn't valued and hasn't been read. Nor that you can't keep posting. And sometimes I have days where I could merrily shove every last bit of help and advice up the poster's arse. There's no one fit all solution sadly. I do sincerely hope that whatever you do to get through it, you're at least a bit kind to yourself. Anyway, thanks to threads like these I do feel a lot less alone. Thanks OP and those who have been open about their experiences. x" I totally agree my experience isn’t the same as anyone else’s and I reach out to anyone struggling, please don’t be alone. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Anyway, thanks to threads like these I do feel a lot less alone. Thanks OP and those who have been open about their experiences. x" ^^^^ exactly that | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Anyway, thanks to threads like these I do feel a lot less alone. Thanks OP and those who have been open about their experiences. x ^^^^ exactly that " Hope your ok, I struggle every day, but it’s one day one step, If you need to chat here x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"January often sucks. Mental health issues can be exacerbated. Depression, anxiety, and other issues. Let's talk how to pull ourselves up. " Me personally Talking helps, Having good people around who understand the pain that’s unique to the individual The ole cliche seek help. Talking about it takes away the stigma and the fear of having a mental health problem. Christmas is not a season of goodwill and joy for all. It’s a painful sad time for some and the de clutter after Christmas is a big deal to some. Exercise and a journal helped me with my recovery | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Running It’s a savour I even if just a few k with music and fresh air " It does get the mind racing...puts things in perspective and the adrenalin puts one in a good place | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"January often sucks. Mental health issues can be exacerbated. Depression, anxiety, and other issues. Let's talk how to pull ourselves up. Me personally Talking helps, Having good people around who understand the pain that’s unique to the individual The ole cliche seek help. Talking about it takes away the stigma and the fear of having a mental health problem. Christmas is not a season of goodwill and joy for all. It’s a painful sad time for some and the de clutter after Christmas is a big deal to some. Exercise and a journal helped me with my recovery" Me personally I’m not a talker, I hate talking so speaking doesn’t help “Talk helps”. So for anyone like myself who finds it hard to “talk “ pm me. There is other avenues | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Me personally Talking helps, Having good people around who understand the pain that’s unique to the individual The ole cliche seek help. Talking about it takes away the stigma and the fear of having a mental health problem. Christmas is not a season of goodwill and joy for all. It’s a painful sad time for some and the de clutter after Christmas is a big deal to some. Exercise and a journal helped me with my recovery. Having small goals and plans in the nearby future will have a great impact on you. It will help focus the mind and body " Whilst I agree, I will disagree, it works for YOU! Not everyone is like you or me. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Exercise and surrounding yourself with people who will grow you as a person! Exercise is the number 1 best help for mental health issues! You can’t be down after you beast a 45 min run/walk/swim, you feel like a winner, and that winning mentality carries over into other aspects of your life. 100% works for me " Running helped me , | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Exercise and surrounding yourself with people who will grow you as a person! Exercise is the number 1 best help for mental health issues! You can’t be down after you beast a 45 min run/walk/swim, you feel like a winner, and that winning mentality carries over into other aspects of your life. 100% works for me Running helped me , " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Thanks for post OP. Some helpful bits. I tried to take my life last year but failed at that. Ive been to scared to ask for help but i may now. " My friend tried to commit suicide this week. Fortunately she called someone. I am currently going through the various emotion of guilt for not being there / wishing I'd done more / sadness / distress / shock... And anger. Its a strange time. Please, as others have said, reach out for help... I'm no expert but a GP would be a great place - they won't judge, they will only be concerned about how to help. They will also want to talk - remember your conversations are confidential so try to be transparent. If a GP is too hard, google the on-line resouces - they often have helplines. Good luck with your journey x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"January often sucks. Mental health issues can be exacerbated. Depression, anxiety, and other issues. Let's talk how to pull ourselves up. Me personally Talking helps, Having good people around who understand the pain that’s unique to the individual The ole cliche seek help. Talking about it takes away the stigma and the fear of having a mental health problem. Christmas is not a season of goodwill and joy for all. It’s a painful sad time for some and the de clutter after Christmas is a big deal to some. Exercise and a journal helped me with my recovery Me personally I’m not a talker, I hate talking so speaking doesn’t help “Talk helps”. So for anyone like myself who finds it hard to “talk “ pm me. There is other avenues " I’m not a talker either - especially with my nearest and dearest. I have found that long cycle rides help with my mental state, as does music - learning or (as in my case) taking up an instrument afresh is a real refuge. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"January often sucks. Mental health issues can be exacerbated. Depression, anxiety, and other issues. Let's talk how to pull ourselves up. Me personally Talking helps, Having good people around who understand the pain that’s unique to the individual The ole cliche seek help. Talking about it takes away the stigma and the fear of having a mental health problem. Christmas is not a season of goodwill and joy for all. It’s a painful sad time for some and the de clutter after Christmas is a big deal to some. Exercise and a journal helped me with my recovery Me personally I’m not a talker, I hate talking so speaking doesn’t help “Talk helps”. So for anyone like myself who finds it hard to “talk “ pm me. There is other avenues " You are right, talking about it is not for everyone. What works for you then? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"January often sucks. Mental health issues can be exacerbated. Depression, anxiety, and other issues. Let's talk how to pull ourselves up. Me personally Talking helps, Having good people around who understand the pain that’s unique to the individual The ole cliche seek help. Talking about it takes away the stigma and the fear of having a mental health problem. Christmas is not a season of goodwill and joy for all. It’s a painful sad time for some and the de clutter after Christmas is a big deal to some. Exercise and a journal helped me with my recovery Me personally I’m not a talker, I hate talking so speaking doesn’t help “Talk helps”. So for anyone like myself who finds it hard to “talk “ pm me. There is other avenues I’m not a talker either - especially with my nearest and dearest. I have found that long cycle rides help with my mental state, as does music - learning or (as in my case) taking up an instrument afresh is a real refuge." I wasn’t a talker either, I did foolishly try and battle through alone. I thought I could keep it buried and deal with it myself. I did learn to open up and talk to both friends and professional people. I am an ex serving military man so talking about my feelings was tough. Writing out to the universe, mindfulness, sleep and experiences have helped me massively | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"January often sucks. Mental health issues can be exacerbated. Depression, anxiety, and other issues. Let's talk how to pull ourselves up. Me personally Talking helps, Having good people around who understand the pain that’s unique to the individual The ole cliche seek help. Talking about it takes away the stigma and the fear of having a mental health problem. Christmas is not a season of goodwill and joy for all. It’s a painful sad time for some and the de clutter after Christmas is a big deal to some. Exercise and a journal helped me with my recovery Me personally I’m not a talker, I hate talking so speaking doesn’t help “Talk helps”. So for anyone like myself who finds it hard to “talk “ pm me. There is other avenues I’m not a talker either - especially with my nearest and dearest. I have found that long cycle rides help with my mental state, as does music - learning or (as in my case) taking up an instrument afresh is a real refuge. I wasn’t a talker either, I did foolishly try and battle through alone. I thought I could keep it buried and deal with it myself. I did learn to open up and talk to both friends and professional people. I am an ex serving military man so talking about my feelings was tough. Writing out to the universe, mindfulness, sleep and experiences have helped me massively " Yes I opened up to one family member, who helped me massively, however she still didn’t “understand “. Most people don’t understand self harm and think it’s a “ look at me” thing. It’s far from it. I myself hide it and I’m embarrassed | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"just broke up with the female I love, cant sleep, cant think, cant do anything without her being in my thoughts, not even looking on here, just chatting on forums, I miss her so much, life aint worth living without her" Oh please don’t think you’d alone , hope you’re ok. X | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"just broke up with the female I love, cant sleep, cant think, cant do anything without her being in my thoughts, not even looking on here, just chatting on forums, I miss her so much, life aint worth living without her Oh please don’t think you’d alone , hope you’re ok. X" * you’re | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Exercise is the number 1 best help for mental health issues! You can’t be down after you beast a 45 min run/walk/swim, you feel like a winner, and that winning mentality carries over into other aspects of your life. 100% works for me " Yes you can be down after. Glad it works for you but I always feel shit after exercise | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Best mental health treatment is good sex and a cuddle up to sleep " That's a profoundly ignorant comment. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Afternoon FAB Fam... I struggled IMMENSLEY with anxiety for a few years, caused by mental and physical abuse (yep, happens to men too!) and I found it hard to talk about it. I left her and started on my own again 5 years ago... Its taken me a while... I hated myself and was always worried about how my kids would perceive me. But I learned to socialise again, I'm always kind to people and that's what made me feel better... Making others feel good about themselves, because generally it was repaid with kind words back... Huge hugs to anyone who feels bad today or tomorrow or any day... If you ever wanna reach out... I'll be here " Good man keep it up. I can relate to that | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Afternoon FAB Fam... I struggled IMMENSLEY with anxiety for a few years, caused by mental and physical abuse (yep, happens to men too!) and I found it hard to talk about it. I left her and started on my own again 5 years ago... Its taken me a while... I hated myself and was always worried about how my kids would perceive me. But I learned to socialise again, I'm always kind to people and that's what made me feel better... Making others feel good about themselves, because generally it was repaid with kind words back... Huge hugs to anyone who feels bad today or tomorrow or any day... If you ever wanna reach out... I'll be here Good man keep it up. I can relate to that" Thanks buddy.... Hope that means you're feeling better! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Afternoon FAB Fam... I struggled IMMENSLEY with anxiety for a few years, caused by mental and physical abuse (yep, happens to men too!) and I found it hard to talk about it. I left her and started on my own again 5 years ago... Its taken me a while... I hated myself and was always worried about how my kids would perceive me. But I learned to socialise again, I'm always kind to people and that's what made me feel better... Making others feel good about themselves, because generally it was repaid with kind words back... Huge hugs to anyone who feels bad today or tomorrow or any day... If you ever wanna reach out... I'll be here " Huge respect and I totally understand where your coming from ie, kids. My door is always open if you ever need to chat x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Best mental health treatment is good sex and a cuddle up to sleep " Illl remember that next time I want to self harm, comments like this are so not good , even though you probably mean well , you can’t just snap out of real depression. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |