FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Getting pretty bored of fab...
Getting pretty bored of fab...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x"
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going"
If you do decide to come back, ull have a harder time getting a meet, cause ull be unverified, better off hiding you're account |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going
If you do decide to come back, ull have a harder time getting a meet, cause ull be unverified, better off hiding you're account "
LMFAO... what verifications? Thats the thing, cant get verified if you go unnoticed and cant even get a meet going in the first place...
Like the job paradox, need verifications to get a meet, needs meets to get a verification... totally idiotic |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going
If you do decide to come back, ull have a harder time getting a meet, cause ull be unverified, better off hiding you're account
LMFAO... what verifications? Thats the thing, cant get verified if you go unnoticed and cant even get a meet going in the first place...
Like the job paradox, need verifications to get a meet, needs meets to get a verification... totally idiotic "
Ohhhhhh you make a compelling strong point. I didn't. Bother looking..... Guilty. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm so bored on here "
Dude the single mans world is totally shit wherever you are. Women do the selecting and the men just gotta do their thing and fucking pray they get chosen.
The fact there are so many arbitrary rules and criteria you have to meet before you even get considered by a woman is bullshit but thats the reality of it
Ofc it doesnt exactly help when there are so many men out there who are complete twats and ruin it for the rest of us genuine respectable guys. Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Go
Go
And go
Be with your ex and give that 100% and try to be happy.
This place can eat at your sexual soul and rot you in a bad way.
But you will come back sometime because you enjoy the chase(no not the itv chase!!!) and the hope that goes with it
.
Tony |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Go
Go
And go
Be with your ex and give that 100% and try to be happy.
This place can eat at your sexual soul and rot you in a bad way.
But you will come back sometime because you enjoy the chase(no not the itv chase!!!) and the hope that goes with it
.
Tony"
Eh i always give 110%, up to her if she wants to make the same effort, a relationship cant work if both ppl aint on the same page.
I know what you mean though, i seen somebguys on here chatting and they seem almost broken, its so sad, women can be so cruel and not even realise it. As for me, it wont get me down in the way you put, maybe a bit annoyed and bored but thats all. I know im a mother fucking tiger and i stand tall and proud, its just annoying sifting through all ppl here to find a lioness on a whim |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Actually thinking about it... id get more success finding casual sex on dating sites where women want relationships and not interested in casual sex. Aint that a dumb twist |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Me to so that is where I'm going "
Dont do it unless you enjoy being an asshole... i dont do it cos its disrespectful to the ppl who are looking for something with meaning and you just fuck em and leave, especially as youd have to work for the sex a lot more, it aint just gonna be offered on a plate on the first date |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are 2 types of people here.
The single guys who put no effort into their profile and going to events socials etc and expect woman to fall at their feet.
Then the other type who put the effort in, chat on the forum's, have a good profile, put themselves out there meeting people.
Beast had no problems getting meets when we met. I have a lot of male friends that don't struggle too.....
Belle |
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"Me to so that is where I'm going
Dont do it unless you enjoy being an asshole... i dont do it cos its disrespectful to the ppl who are looking for something with meaning and you just fuck em and leave, especially as youd have to work for the sex a lot more, it aint just gonna be offered on a plate on the first date"
And there lies your problem it wont get offered to you on a plate her either I'm fed up of reading these whining threads on how ignored you are when in fact its us wemon who are ignored ... men on here very rarely read the profile of a woman and we dont demand anything as you put it ... we have our preferences again most of the men who msg us fo not fill that preference so why the hell would we reply ?? Its just as hard for us to rifle through all your crap messages to find our diamond... shut the door on way out |
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"Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
Damn us for being 'selective and picky' about who we let stick their dick in us, eh? 
"
Yeah, damn you!
But if it’s only blokes who have it hard here, how about women who aren’t selective and picky? Because they get a harsh treatment too. |
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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago
mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds |
"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?"
So if a 1/3 say go a 1/3 say hide a 1/3 say stay and a 1/3 aren't sure what ya gonna do?
Only you can decide what ya gonna do.
Me I'm in the 1/3 that don't really care, I spend my time and energy on positive things.  |
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"
So if a 1/3 say go a 1/3 say hide a 1/3 say stay and a 1/3 aren't sure what ya gonna do?
Only you can decide what ya gonna do.
Me I'm in the 1/3 that don't really care, I spend my time and energy on positive things. "
That's 5/3...you must have multiple profiles  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry OP but you’re profile really isn’t great so maybe that was the reason for your lack of engagement. This site is easy providing you put the effort in at the right places. But then again. Some people aren’t going to be cut out for the life style. They is a massive difference between a swinging Male and a man just looking for sex. Learn to be a swinger and success floods in. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?
So if a 1/3 say go a 1/3 say hide a 1/3 say stay and a 1/3 aren't sure what ya gonna do?
Only you can decide what ya gonna do.
Me I'm in the 1/3 that don't really care, I spend my time and energy on positive things. "
that'd be 4/3rds  |
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I'm taking a sabbatical, not leaving but just need time away from the site, starting on new years day. It's not because of a new relationship or anything just need to concentrate on something else for awhile.
I think it's not a bad idea to hide for awhile, and it'll also take away from my most searched website on my Google home page  |
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By *bob1202Man
over a year ago
Blackburn |
"There are 2 types of people here.
The single guys who put no effort into their profile and going to events socials etc and expect woman to fall at their feet.
Then the other type who put the effort in, chat on the forum's, have a good profile, put themselves out there meeting people.
Beast had no problems getting meets when we met. I have a lot of male friends that don't struggle too.....
Belle "
This is the post that i think answers it for all us unsuccesful males. We dont go to socials or meets. We may not really be part of the swinging set, primarily because were single males and not part of a couple. Are socials accepting of singke males ive not been to one. What i was hoping to do is find a single lady who is in a similar position and we could tentavily explore the scene together.
Im approaching this a bit differently now. Now i woukd like just to chat and learn and make friends..there is no doubt i have more luck outside of fab, but my curiosity still keeps me here.
I think that helps manage my expextations.
Jbob |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm giving a long arm to fab in the New Year after my birthday! Got bigger better things on the horizon ... but I'm not leaving, more longterm hiding my profile and being a lurker in the forums (I've kind of got a little jaded with the whole thing and life will be going through an awesome change so giving that my time n energy instead!) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think deleting your profile and taking a clean break from here is a good idea. Focus on seeing if things could work with your ex. As she has declared she is polyamorous perhaps explore the club scene. You’ve got Chams in Newport you could visit and see if you can find some people in there that tickle your pickle together. However before you do that spend time with your ex talking and listening and even more tie seeing if you can really enjoy being together again. Good luck whatever you decide. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm giving a long arm to fab in the New Year after my birthday! Got bigger better things on the horizon ... but I'm not leaving, more longterm hiding my profile and being a lurker in the forums (I've kind of got a little jaded with the whole thing and life will be going through an awesome change so giving that my time n energy instead!) "
Sounds exciting Trudy. I hope it’s even more awesome than you imagined. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have also been contemplating my Fab future. I have some wonderful online friends on Fab and I have a small number of them I’d like to be more than online friends with. This coming year will determine whether I can make a reality of this or not. Endeavouring to make it a reality is my intent for the New Year, so I go into the New Year with hope. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have also been contemplating my Fab future. I have some wonderful online friends on Fab and I have a small number of them I’d like to be more than online friends with. This coming year will determine whether I can make a reality of this or not. Endeavouring to make it a reality is my intent for the New Year, so I go into the New Year with hope."
good luck whatever you decide you are one of the good guys  |
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
"I have also been contemplating my Fab future. I have some wonderful online friends on Fab and I have a small number of them I’d like to be more than online friends with. This coming year will determine whether I can make a reality of this or not. Endeavouring to make it a reality is my intent for the New Year, so I go into the New Year with hope."
Oi! You cannot go  |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
Sorry Op, but you've put very little effort into your profile. Even if you're good with messaging, women will often check the profile first before answering. If they feel it's a lazy effort, they're more likely to concentrate their attention on someone else.
To use an analogy - It's clearly a buyer's market heavily skewered in women's favour! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have also been contemplating my Fab future. I have some wonderful online friends on Fab and I have a small number of them I’d like to be more than online friends with. This coming year will determine whether I can make a reality of this or not. Endeavouring to make it a reality is my intent for the New Year, so I go into the New Year with hope."
I'm sure you will! You know w.hat they say ... "where there's a will there's a way!" I'm lucky in as much as I'm in touch with everyone I meet/want to meet off fab so can keep in contact 
And thanks, I have no choice regarding the change in my life bit believe very much in "it's what you choose it to be & make it!" |
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Go with "real life". You have a promising opportunity to work on.
Not to sound harsh but if you feel like leaving then leave.
The threads are filled with posts from guys looking for that last minute glimmer of hope and reassurance.
So many factors come into play that are never taken into consideration when joining.
Good luck to you and your ex. I'm all for second chances and if you both put the effort in then it could be exactly what you need.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are 2 types of people here.
The single guys who put no effort into their profile and going to events socials etc and expect woman to fall at their feet.
Then the other type who put the effort in, chat on the forum's, have a good profile, put themselves out there meeting people.
Beast had no problems getting meets when we met. I have a lot of male friends that don't struggle too.....
Belle
This is the post that i think answers it for all us unsuccesful males. We dont go to socials or meets. We may not really be part of the swinging set, primarily because were single males and not part of a couple. Are socials accepting of singke males ive not been to one. What i was hoping to do is find a single lady who is in a similar position and we could tentavily explore the scene together.
Im approaching this a bit differently now. Now i woukd like just to chat and learn and make friends..there is no doubt i have more luck outside of fab, but my curiosity still keeps me here.
I think that helps manage my expextations.
Jbob"
Yes the organised socials do accept single males in many cases, depends which ones you choose though. Making friends, getting to know others as people is a very good approach. Too much focus on the sex aspect is counterproductive usually. |
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By *mberWoman
over a year ago
Preston |
"Maths isn't quite right here
Glad I’m not the only one who noticed
"
I figured that there was a Venn diagram going on. 1/3 stay, 1/3 go, 1/3 the other thing I can't rem_mber and a few of each section don't care.
Did I over think it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have also been contemplating my Fab future. I have some wonderful online friends on Fab and I have a small number of them I’d like to be more than online friends with. This coming year will determine whether I can make a reality of this or not. Endeavouring to make it a reality is my intent for the New Year, so I go into the New Year with hope.
I'm sure you will! You know w.hat they say ... "where there's a will there's a way!" I'm lucky in as much as I'm in touch with everyone I meet/want to meet off fab so can keep in contact
And thanks, I have no choice regarding the change in my life bit believe very much in "it's what you choose it to be & make it!" "
I am pretty sure you’ll make it what you want it to be. I’ve enjoyed our few conversations in the past and your presence around here. I will miss it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well i’m not going anywhere.
I have a busy year ahead of me accademically thanks to the course i’ve started and i’m going to need someone to de-stress me. Hard. And often.
"
Ooh all the best for the new educational opportunity and the de-stressing programme |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maths isn't quite right here
Glad I’m not the only one who noticed
I figured that there was a Venn diagram going on. 1/3 stay, 1/3 go, 1/3 the other thing I can't rem_mber and a few of each section don't care.
Did I over think it?"
I love a Venn diagram  |
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Have to say your first pic contradicts part of your post about not being a cocky jerk. It puts me off for sure.
Sounds like you won't ever be happy no matter what to be honest. Not happy with the ex, not happy without her. Not happy on here, not happy off here. Maybe just spend some time learning to be you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have also been contemplating my Fab future. I have some wonderful online friends on Fab and I have a small number of them I’d like to be more than online friends with. This coming year will determine whether I can make a reality of this or not. Endeavouring to make it a reality is my intent for the New Year, so I go into the New Year with hope.
Oi! You cannot go "
Did that sound like a leaving speech? It was meant to be the opposite |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have also been contemplating my Fab future. I have some wonderful online friends on Fab and I have a small number of them I’d like to be more than online friends with. This coming year will determine whether I can make a reality of this or not. Endeavouring to make it a reality is my intent for the New Year, so I go into the New Year with hope.
Oi! You cannot go
Did that sound like a leaving speech? It was meant to be the opposite"
good man |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South |
"Well i’m not going anywhere.
I have a busy year ahead of me accademically thanks to the course i’ve started and i’m going to need someone to de-stress me. Hard. And often.
Ooh all the best for the new educational opportunity and the de-stressing programme"
Thanks Doc |
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
"I have also been contemplating my Fab future. I have some wonderful online friends on Fab and I have a small number of them I’d like to be more than online friends with. This coming year will determine whether I can make a reality of this or not. Endeavouring to make it a reality is my intent for the New Year, so I go into the New Year with hope.
Oi! You cannot go
Did that sound like a leaving speech? It was meant to be the opposite"
Phew..thank goodness.
Now all you have to do is message those you fancy, and ask them if they want a shag. Simples |
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By *mberWoman
over a year ago
Preston |
"Have to say your first pic contradicts part of your post about not being a cocky jerk. It puts me off for sure.
Sounds like you won't ever be happy no matter what to be honest. Not happy with the ex, not happy without her. Not happy on here, not happy off here. Maybe just spend some time learning to be you. "
Exactly this, plus the bit about having pussy on demand. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have also been contemplating my Fab future. I have some wonderful online friends on Fab and I have a small number of them I’d like to be more than online friends with. This coming year will determine whether I can make a reality of this or not. Endeavouring to make it a reality is my intent for the New Year, so I go into the New Year with hope.
Oi! You cannot go
Did that sound like a leaving speech? It was meant to be the opposite
Phew..thank goodness.
Now all you have to do is message those you fancy, and ask them if they want a shag. Simples "
All in good time, all in good time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP..please just go.
You clearly do not understand what swinging is about, and your expectations will never be met.
I wish you well in 2020."
This exactly FAB is a swingers site. That’s what many single males don’t respect. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP..please just go.
You clearly do not understand what swinging is about, and your expectations will never be met.
I wish you well in 2020.
This exactly FAB is a swingers site. That’s what many single males don’t respect."
We agree totally as well. We just dismiss men on here and instead only deal with ones at clubs, who understand how to swing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OP..please just go.
You clearly do not understand what swinging is about, and your expectations will never be met.
I wish you well in 2020.
This exactly FAB is a swingers site. That’s what many single males don’t respect."
I think fab can be used however you wish to use it. I’m not a swinger and I use it for occasional sex |
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By *oxychicWoman
over a year ago
Nottinghamshire |
"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?"
Hide your profile see it goes but why would u go back to something your unsure of just fir the sake of pussy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Your messages seems to indicate that you are expecting people to make the effort to meet you It may come as a surprise, but it is you that is required to make the effort.
That said, we might all be wasting our time. We have specific requirements on our profile and it is 97% impossible to find anyone that fits it.
Worse still, lots of liars try their luck but are found out |
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"Me to so that is where I'm going
Dont do it unless you enjoy being an asshole... i dont do it cos its disrespectful to the ppl who are looking for something with meaning and you just fuck em and leave, especially as youd have to work for the sex a lot more, it aint just gonna be offered on a plate on the first date"
This makes zero sense. You're complaining that it's easier to get laid on dating sites than on here but saying you have to put a lot more work in on dating sites. Maybe if you put that work in on here you'd do better on here. It's clearly not being "offered to you on a plate" here either  . |
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I’ve been on here, with mixed results, yes at first it’s hard to meet people when your not varified , and yes single women have it easier, but you just have to get over it, I know some good looking couples, who find it difficult, I think if your a gorgeous couple into the scene for a few years, and do lots of parties and clubs, I’m sure you can be having loads of sex, I would say, take your time, read profiles properly before messaging them, don’t be pushy, make sure your profile has some pictures and a decent write up.
Also don’t send mixed messages on your profile, , if your saying your quiet and respectful, don’t have lots of cock pictures, and action shots, if your a couple that sell yourselves as being very out going you can do that, if chatting to a bi couple, be bi on your profile, people on here aren’t stupid, and don’t treat them as so .
Finally don’t use text speak, it really annoys a lot of people.
Happy Fabbiing |
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By *bob1202Man
over a year ago
Blackburn |
On these forums i see a lot of comnents on what single males do wrong on these sites. And sometimes i despair at what some of them do. However lets be constructive. What can single men do right. If you are interested in meeting a single man on this website what do you want from them. Perhaps we will complain less once we know....dont bet on it though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"On these forums i see a lot of comnents on what single males do wrong on these sites. And sometimes i despair at what some of them do. However lets be constructive. What can single men do right. If you are interested in meeting a single man on this website what do you want from them. Perhaps we will complain less once we know....dont bet on it though "
Thing is, there is loads of advice on here. Loads of people that try to help single guys
Very few have enough self awareness to even understand WHY they get nowhere.
OP describing women as "pussy" pretty much says it all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?"
I’ve been back a month or so and finding it to be very similar.
Are there proportionally a lot more men to women/couples when I was last on??
Like you op i’m considered an attractive guy,look after myself,professional.intelligent,eloquent,and if I do message someone,it’s not a crappy one liner,copy & paste,or dick pics.
Hide your profile and see what’s what away from here.If things work out,then either just leave it or come back on and delete. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?"
Why dont you ask her if shed be interested in a couples profile
Might be more succesful than a singles |
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By *T_LEECouple (MM)
over a year ago
near you |
"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?"
Just leave if that’s what you want |
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By *bob1202Man
over a year ago
Blackburn |
"On these forums i see a lot of comnents on what single males do wrong on these sites. And sometimes i despair at what some of them do. However lets be constructive. What can single men do right. If you are interested in meeting a single man on this website what do you want from them. Perhaps we will complain less once we know....dont bet on it though
Thing is, there is loads of advice on here. Loads of people that try to help single guys
Very few have enough self awareness to even understand WHY they get nowhere.
OP describing women as "pussy" pretty much says it all"
Yeah the pussy thing kinda lost a bit of sympathy there. Okay i will scan the forums for advice. However i get the ops frustrations. When i reach out i look for peoople who are active on fab, ie been online in the last month. I match what they are looking for and i try to be original. However often they dont open the letter and dont view my profile. So you wonder what to do. I think the best way is to make the effort put yourself out there and join a swinger club. Meet people in real life and carry it on here. |
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"On these forums i see a lot of comnents on what single males do wrong on these sites. And sometimes i despair at what some of them do. However lets be constructive. What can single men do right. If you are interested in meeting a single man on this website what do you want from them. Perhaps we will complain less once we know....dont bet on it though
Thing is, there is loads of advice on here. Loads of people that try to help single guys
Very few have enough self awareness to even understand WHY they get nowhere.
OP describing women as "pussy" pretty much says it all"
Yep |
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"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?"
Lower your expectations and limit the time you spend on here.
Life's short and I think a huge % of guys miss what's going on around them for the slim chance of a bit of fun.
Stay on by all means but make sure you control fab not the other way around
Good luck with whatever you decide |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Dude the single mans world is totally shit wherever you are. Women do the selecting and the men just gotta do their thing and fucking pray they get chosen.
The fact there are so many arbitrary rules and criteria you have to meet before you even get considered by a woman is bullshit but thats the reality of it
Ofc it doesnt exactly help when there are so many men out there who are complete twats and ruin it for the rest of us genuine respectable guys. Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky"
Yep this. Women need to be less selective and picky and just fuck anyone |
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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago
Durham, North Yorkshire and can travel |
"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going
If you do decide to come back, ull have a harder time getting a meet, cause ull be unverified, better off hiding you're account
LMFAO... what verifications? Thats the thing, cant get verified if you go unnoticed and cant even get a meet going in the first place...
Like the job paradox, need verifications to get a meet, needs meets to get a verification... totally idiotic "
It's easy to get verified. The system works well. It is there to out the the people who aren't so genuine. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going
If you do decide to come back, ull have a harder time getting a meet, cause ull be unverified, better off hiding you're account
LMFAO... what verifications? Thats the thing, cant get verified if you go unnoticed and cant even get a meet going in the first place...
Like the job paradox, need verifications to get a meet, needs meets to get a verification... totally idiotic
It's easy to get verified. The system works well. It is there to out the the people who aren't so genuine."
For single females and couples that have a female as part of it..yes.
Best way for a guy too is clubs or socials if they allow single guys |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Go with "real life". You have a promising opportunity to work on.
Not to sound harsh but if you feel like leaving then leave.
The threads are filled with posts from guys looking for that last minute glimmer of hope and reassurance.
So many factors come into play that are never taken into consideration when joining.
Good luck to you and your ex. I'm all for second chances and if you both put the effort in then it could be exactly what you need.
"
This. I may be wrong, but a lot of threads perceived to be attention seeking, very often run far deeper.
The forums very often claim to be sympathetic to depression and welfare, and quite often people who write such posts are struggling with happiness, and confuse Fabs thrills with the solution to deeper happiness.
Not being happy in vanilla life, will simply magnify how you feel here, and short term attention fixes and sexual highs will only numb feelings for awhile.
Be truthful to yourself and act upon that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Life lived on the internet is a bit shit really. All you marvellous men being ignored and all. Go out and be marvellous in your world instead. You wont have to tell people how great you are in messages we can see for ourselves. |
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By *bob1202Man
over a year ago
Blackburn |
"Life lived on the internet is a bit shit really. All you marvellous men being ignored and all. Go out and be marvellous in your world instead. You wont have to tell people how great you are in messages we can see for ourselves. "
Well said Autumn...so whereabouts do you hang out again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going"
Merry Christmas
Op
Go with your gut instinct
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Go with "real life". You have a promising opportunity to work on.
Not to sound harsh but if you feel like leaving then leave.
The threads are filled with posts from guys looking for that last minute glimmer of hope and reassurance.
So many factors come into play that are never taken into consideration when joining.
Good luck to you and your ex. I'm all for second chances and if you both put the effort in then it could be exactly what you need.
This. I may be wrong, but a lot of threads perceived to be attention seeking, very often run far deeper.
The forums very often claim to be sympathetic to depression and welfare, and quite often people who write such posts are struggling with happiness, and confuse Fabs thrills with the solution to deeper happiness.
Not being happy in vanilla life, will simply magnify how you feel here, and short term attention fixes and sexual highs will only numb feelings for awhile.
Be truthful to yourself and act upon that."
Very wise words here OP |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?"
And OP
guys will look at you
Views are not filtered
We all get spam
Not just here
|
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By *andKBCouple
over a year ago
Plymouth |
It's not just the single men who struggle!! We're finding it very difficult on here of late. In the just over a year weve been here weve had ONE meet from fab!! The rest have been socials, clubs or repeats from clubs.
Though I will say this... when we let our filters down back alone in 3 weeks and 50 plus messages for single guys... 3 were worth persuing!! 3!! 1 turned out to be married and the other 2 we are still chatting to!! The rest were fuck now, shes hot type messages. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Dont do it unless you enjoy being an asshole... i dont do it cos its disrespectful to the ppl who are looking for something with meaning and you just fuck em and leave"
I agree with this comment it is super annoying joining a dating site to get messed around and find out the guy only wanted a leg over. Better off on Fab if you just want a shag.
That being said with Fab ‘when the fun stops, stop!’ This can be a frustrating place for many people, for many reasons. Not receiving the attention you feel you deserve is one of them. I had a better time getting out to clubs and events more. Time permitting i hope to get back to that. Hide your profile OP see what your ex has to offer.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
Damn us for being 'selective and picky' about who we let stick their dick in us, eh?
"
Totally agree with you there, however I’m also on the fence as seems like I’m not wanted 100% by the guy I’m meeting - maybes I just feel it’s time to invest in someone who does actually want to be with me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going"
Its like having thoughts about getting married if you have doubts then the message is don't.
|
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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago
Durham, North Yorkshire and can travel |
"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going
If you do decide to come back, ull have a harder time getting a meet, cause ull be unverified, better off hiding you're account
LMFAO... what verifications? Thats the thing, cant get verified if you go unnoticed and cant even get a meet going in the first place...
Like the job paradox, need verifications to get a meet, needs meets to get a verification... totally idiotic
It's easy to get verified. The system works well. It is there to out the the people who aren't so genuine.
For single females and couples that have a female as part of it..yes.
Best way for a guy too is clubs or socials if they allow single guys "
Exactly. A club or a social. Easy as 123. Problem is some single guys sign up to here expecting to get sex instantly. It is a swinging site, not a sex site. The 2 are very different. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going
If you do decide to come back, ull have a harder time getting a meet, cause ull be unverified, better off hiding you're account
LMFAO... what verifications? Thats the thing, cant get verified if you go unnoticed and cant even get a meet going in the first place...
Like the job paradox, need verifications to get a meet, needs meets to get a verification... totally idiotic
It's easy to get verified. The system works well. It is there to out the the people who aren't so genuine.
For single females and couples that have a female as part of it..yes.
Best way for a guy too is clubs or socials if they allow single guys
Exactly. A club or a social. Easy as 123. Problem is some single guys sign up to here expecting to get sex instantly. It is a swinging site, not a sex site. The 2 are very different."
Unless you are a women then the sex part don’t happen overnight. Many a single female are just looking for sex aswell. Many a couple are after a unicorn and many a guy are looking to empty he’s sack  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Dude the single mans world is totally shit wherever you are. Women do the selecting and the men just gotta do their thing and fucking pray they get chosen.
The fact there are so many arbitrary rules and criteria you have to meet before you even get considered by a woman is bullshit but thats the reality of it
Ofc it doesnt exactly help when there are so many men out there who are complete twats and ruin it for the rest of us genuine respectable guys. Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
Yep this. Women need to be less selective and picky and just fuck anyone "
Its not picky
Its having standards
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Dude the single mans world is totally shit wherever you are. Women do the selecting and the men just gotta do their thing and fucking pray they get chosen.
The fact there are so many arbitrary rules and criteria you have to meet before you even get considered by a woman is bullshit but thats the reality of it
Ofc it doesnt exactly help when there are so many men out there who are complete twats and ruin it for the rest of us genuine respectable guys. Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
Yep this. Women need to be less selective and picky and just fuck anyone
Its not picky
Its having standards
"
Standards 
Some guys will fuck any hole. That’s standards you know. Not looking at the face takes a special kind of talent |
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"I may be wrong, but a lot of threads perceived to be attention seeking, very often run far deeper.
The forums very often claim to be sympathetic to depression and welfare, and quite often people who write such posts are struggling with happiness, and confuse Fabs thrills with the solution to deeper happiness.
Not being happy in vanilla life, will simply magnify how you feel here, and short term attention fixes and sexual highs will only numb feelings for awhile.
Be truthful to yourself and act upon that."
Yes and no. I'm not suggesting for a second that women should go around dispensing "sympathy sex", or lowering their standards for every guy who claims to be a bit down, but there is a marked contrast between the tone of threads discussing the current hot topic of depression and those relating to the success, or lack of it, amongst men on Fab. Yet the connection is obvious - loneliness and repeated rejection can have a huge adverse impact on mental wellbeing.
It's probably at about this point that someone will say that Fab isn't the place for someone in that frame of mind, but I disagree wholeheartedly with the distinction between "Fab thrills" and "the solution to deeper happiness". Where does that leave the person who has no desire to share a home, to run their life around another person, but who wants to build something meaningful and ongoing with regular intimacy and physical contact?
Personally I find FWB type arrangements suit me down to the ground, but by their very nature are unlikely ever to be "permanent". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you."
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards."
I get lots of guys asking me to meet now
I reply " but you dont even know what i look like"
Very often, they come back with " I dont care"
Or nonsense like " your tits look nice, so i figure the rest of you will be too"
Bless 'em |
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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago
Durham, North Yorkshire and can travel |
"Stay hide your profile xx and see how it goes x
I just straight up delete my profile when i go cos idk if and when ill come back. But problem im thinking is if i come back, will it just be the same shit? I hate wasting my time and energy for futile ventures when i can put into something more rewarding or worthwhile
The ex situation i aint sure about hence why im on the fence about staying or going
If you do decide to come back, ull have a harder time getting a meet, cause ull be unverified, better off hiding you're account
LMFAO... what verifications? Thats the thing, cant get verified if you go unnoticed and cant even get a meet going in the first place...
Like the job paradox, need verifications to get a meet, needs meets to get a verification... totally idiotic
It's easy to get verified. The system works well. It is there to out the the people who aren't so genuine.
For single females and couples that have a female as part of it..yes.
Best way for a guy too is clubs or socials if they allow single guys
Exactly. A club or a social. Easy as 123. Problem is some single guys sign up to here expecting to get sex instantly. It is a swinging site, not a sex site. The 2 are very different.
Unless you are a women then the sex part don’t happen overnight. Many a single female are just looking for sex aswell. Many a couple are after a unicorn and many a guy are looking to empty he’s sack "
The sex part doesn't always happen instantly for a single female either. I know, I played as a single. If I would shag anything with a pulse, then yes, but myself and women I know struggle to find compatible guys. And as for finding a suitable couple when you're a single fem, don't even get me started. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards.
I get lots of guys asking me to meet now
I reply " but you dont even know what i look like"
Very often, they come back with " I dont care"
Or nonsense like " your tits look nice, so i figure the rest of you will be too"
Bless 'em"
I know my profile is like a passage of war and peace which is why I have two words in there that I request as a subject in the first message so I know who actually takes notice. I’m open minded and like a laugh as much as the next person but I’m easy going not easy! |
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" It is a swinging site, not a sex site. The 2 are very different."
I see this written a lot on here, and I don't really understand. Regardless of what the site is called, and however often that line is repeated, Fab is both. Some people, men and women, join to be fully fledged swingers. Others, again both sexes, sign up purely for casual sex and have no interest in joining a "lifestyle", attending clubs, or meeting couples.
If there were such a distinction, life might be a lot easier for some people and whenever a certain type of thread arose, the OPs (mostly guys) could be directed from this "swinger" site to one of the mythical "sex" sites to which you allude. If it wasn't against forum rules, I'd ask you to give an example of one of the latter! |
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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago
Durham, North Yorkshire and can travel |
" It is a swinging site, not a sex site. The 2 are very different.
I see this written a lot on here, and I don't really understand. Regardless of what the site is called, and however often that line is repeated, Fab is both. Some people, men and women, join to be fully fledged swingers. Others, again both sexes, sign up purely for casual sex and have no interest in joining a "lifestyle", attending clubs, or meeting couples.
If there were such a distinction, life might be a lot easier for some people and whenever a certain type of thread arose, the OPs (mostly guys) could be directed from this "swinger" site to one of the mythical "sex" sites to which you allude. If it wasn't against forum rules, I'd ask you to give an example of one of the latter!"
OK, yes I can agree that this site means different things to different people, however the amount of people that come here, and moan after a short while of being here that they can't get meets, yet won't fully get involved in the swinging commumity is what I am getting at. They mosn they can't get verified yet won't make the effort and go to a social or a club.
I don't want a forum ban so I can't say it on here, but there are 'ladies of the night' (for want of a better phrase)that are readily available for people who just want instant sex. There are websites for such 'services'. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I half agree with you here. Yes it can be frustrating and at times you feel like you're banging your head against a brick wall trying to get noticed but it's the nature of the beast.
I have also noticed how much easier it is to get girls on normal dating sites or when out because the ratio isn't ridiculous like it is on here and there's also not as many bloated egos.
I find it hard because with so much choice women can get quite forthright and rude because they are fed up of receiving messages from people not acknowledging their wants. I don't think there's ever any excuses for rudeness but it's understandable when people are ignoring what you've stated what you want.
At the end of the day I'm not sure it's the best place for well adjusted men who do ok with women outside of here, unless you like clubbing or have a partner into the scene. The constant rejection, the fact that women will never actually contact you first and the only attention coming from the same sex do nothing for your confidence. Not sure what my point is other than us males feel our pain |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" It is a swinging site, not a sex site. The 2 are very different.
I see this written a lot on here, and I don't really understand. Regardless of what the site is called, and however often that line is repeated, Fab is both. Some people, men and women, join to be fully fledged swingers. Others, again both sexes, sign up purely for casual sex and have no interest in joining a "lifestyle", attending clubs, or meeting couples.
If there were such a distinction, life might be a lot easier for some people and whenever a certain type of thread arose, the OPs (mostly guys) could be directed from this "swinger" site to one of the mythical "sex" sites to which you allude. If it wasn't against forum rules, I'd ask you to give an example of one of the latter!
OK, yes I can agree that this site means different things to different people, however the amount of people that come here, and moan after a short while of being here that they can't get meets, yet won't fully get involved in the swinging commumity is what I am getting at. They mosn they can't get verified yet won't make the effort and go to a social or a club.
I don't want a forum ban so I can't say it on here, but there are 'ladies of the night' (for want of a better phrase)that are readily available for people who just want instant sex. There are websites for such 'services'."
I attended a social and I have to say it really put me off! The place was a dive, overpacked and well pretty overpriced for what it was. I don’t mind meeting a group socially but think meeting one to one is better to see if there is more of a connection on multiple levels or maybes I just have a few more standards and am one of the “picky” ones lol |
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By *bob1202Man
over a year ago
Blackburn |
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards.
I get lots of guys asking me to meet now
I reply " but you dont even know what i look like"
Very often, they come back with " I dont care"
Or nonsense like " your tits look nice, so i figure the rest of you will be too"
Bless 'em"
Wow such charmers. But in all honesty what is more important to me than looks is personality. As cliched as it sounds i am turned off by profiles that say i am desperate for cock and other comments of a similar ilk. Also if they have 165 published verifications i worry that im at the back of a long queue playing russian roulette with my sexual health. Long profiles which tell me all the ways i tick there boxes and then rule me out with the last comment, love them too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards.
I get lots of guys asking me to meet now
I reply " but you dont even know what i look like"
Very often, they come back with " I dont care"
Or nonsense like " your tits look nice, so i figure the rest of you will be too"
Bless 'em
Wow such charmers. But in all honesty what is more important to me than looks is personality. As cliched as it sounds i am turned off by profiles that say i am desperate for cock and other comments of a similar ilk. Also if they have 165 published verifications i worry that im at the back of a long queue playing russian roulette with my sexual health. Long profiles which tell me all the ways i tick there boxes and then rule me out with the last comment, love them too."
So, you wouldnt be 'risking' your sexual health if you met people from outside Fab?
Because they're all virgins, of course? |
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"There are 2 types of people here.
The single guys who put no effort into their profile and going to events socials etc and expect woman to fall at their feet.
Then the other type who put the effort in, chat on the forum's, have a good profile, put themselves out there meeting people.
Beast had no problems getting meets when we met. I have a lot of male friends that don't struggle too.....
Belle "
If only it was as simple as that! I'm sure there are many guys who effectively rule themselves out with crude messages, uunsolicited dick pics and short profiles, but your post almost seems to suggest that any guys with a decent profile and the willingness to attend socials is guaranteed success. The sheer number of guys on here mean that even some who do all the right things will struggle. Conversely, I've done ok on Fab, (nothing spectacular in terms of "conquests", but then I've always preferred ongoing FWBs to lots of notches), yet I've never attended a social in my life, and I've only been to clubs a few times with existing partners.
"Success" is way more of a lottery for guys than women make out - just like with CVs, advice and pointers can really only ever reduce the chances of an application being on the initial "no" pile.
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By *bob1202Man
over a year ago
Blackburn |
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards.
I get lots of guys asking me to meet now
I reply " but you dont even know what i look like"
Very often, they come back with " I dont care"
Or nonsense like " your tits look nice, so i figure the rest of you will be too"
Bless 'em
Wow such charmers. But in all honesty what is more important to me than looks is personality. As cliched as it sounds i am turned off by profiles that say i am desperate for cock and other comments of a similar ilk. Also if they have 165 published verifications i worry that im at the back of a long queue playing russian roulette with my sexual health. Long profiles which tell me all the ways i tick there boxes and then rule me out with the last comment, love them too.
So, you wouldnt be 'risking' your sexual health if you met people from outside Fab?
Because they're all virgins, of course?"
If i meet somebody who admits to having 165 previous partners i would consider id be risking my sexual health. They are not exclusive to either scenario. BTW this also applies to either gender. So no sexisn inferred here. |
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"I may be wrong, but a lot of threads perceived to be attention seeking, very often run far deeper.
The forums very often claim to be sympathetic to depression and welfare, and quite often people who write such posts are struggling with happiness, and confuse Fabs thrills with the solution to deeper happiness.
Not being happy in vanilla life, will simply magnify how you feel here, and short term attention fixes and sexual highs will only numb feelings for awhile.
Be truthful to yourself and act upon that.
Yes and no. I'm not suggesting for a second that women should go around dispensing "sympathy sex", or lowering their standards for every guy who claims to be a bit down, but there is a marked contrast between the tone of threads discussing the current hot topic of depression and those relating to the success, or lack of it, amongst men on Fab. Yet the connection is obvious - loneliness and repeated rejection can have a huge adverse impact on mental wellbeing.
It's probably at about this point that someone will say that Fab isn't the place for someone in that frame of mind, but I disagree wholeheartedly with the distinction between "Fab thrills" and "the solution to deeper happiness". Where does that leave the person who has no desire to share a home, to run their life around another person, but who wants to build something meaningful and ongoing with regular intimacy and physical contact?
Personally I find FWB type arrangements suit me down to the ground, but by their very nature are unlikely ever to be "permanent"."
Relationships aren't garunteed to be permanent, however I know many people who have had long term friends with benefits type arrangements. My partner for example has been seeing another girl for over a year. They haven't established a specific label but he regularly spends weekends with her, has met many of her friends but her family don't know about him. She's free to date others and they're never going to live together. That's not something that interests her and he lives with me anyway. It's an arrangement that suits them both. I've also been seeing someone over a year but we see each other much more sporadically due to his work. He's also not interested in a traditional relationship.
I know others who do similar but then I have many friends who are poly/relationship anarchists also. Of course the majority of people want traditional relationships but you would be surprised how many people out there aren't. Most end up staying single as they don't really know of the alternatives. Personally I think when people get less hung up on how things are "supposed to be" and concentrate more on everyone involved being happy and getting what they need, a lot more people can find what makes them feel fulfilled. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards.
I get lots of guys asking me to meet now
I reply " but you dont even know what i look like"
Very often, they come back with " I dont care"
Or nonsense like " your tits look nice, so i figure the rest of you will be too"
Bless 'em
Wow such charmers. But in all honesty what is more important to me than looks is personality. As cliched as it sounds i am turned off by profiles that say i am desperate for cock and other comments of a similar ilk. Also if they have 165 published verifications i worry that im at the back of a long queue playing russian roulette with my sexual health. Long profiles which tell me all the ways i tick there boxes and then rule me out with the last comment, love them too.
So, you wouldnt be 'risking' your sexual health if you met people from outside Fab?
Because they're all virgins, of course?
If i meet somebody who admits to having 165 previous partners i would consider id be risking my sexual health. They are not exclusive to either scenario. BTW this also applies to either gender. So no sexisn inferred here."
My point was you have no idea about anyone's sexual history.
Or the sexual history of their previous partners
Tell me, by looking at my profile, can you tell how many people I have fucked?
10?
20?
50?
And what about the person that wrote my one published veri?
Has he been faithful to one partner for 20 years?
Or not? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards.
I get lots of guys asking me to meet now
I reply " but you dont even know what i look like"
Very often, they come back with " I dont care"
Or nonsense like " your tits look nice, so i figure the rest of you will be too"
Bless 'em
Wow such charmers. But in all honesty what is more important to me than looks is personality. As cliched as it sounds i am turned off by profiles that say i am desperate for cock and other comments of a similar ilk. Also if they have 165 published verifications i worry that im at the back of a long queue playing russian roulette with my sexual health. Long profiles which tell me all the ways i tick there boxes and then rule me out with the last comment, love them too.
So, you wouldnt be 'risking' your sexual health if you met people from outside Fab?
Because they're all virgins, of course?
If i meet somebody who admits to having 165 previous partners i would consider id be risking my sexual health. They are not exclusive to either scenario. BTW this also applies to either gender. So no sexisn inferred here."
I admit the number of verifications and certain names is a bit of an off put for me and I know I’ll likely be slammed for saying it however everyone is entitled to their own choices. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?"
and OP you are still young and have a life ahead of you
never make rash decisions
one side of you wants that one person to fuck
another side wants you to play the fool ...
Good luck OP |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?
and OP you are still young and have a life ahead of you
never make rash decisions
one side of you wants that one person to fuck
another side wants you to play the fool ...
Good luck OP"
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By *bob1202Man
over a year ago
Blackburn |
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards.
I get lots of guys asking me to meet now
I reply " but you dont even know what i look like"
Very often, they come back with " I dont care"
Or nonsense like " your tits look nice, so i figure the rest of you will be too"
Bless 'em
Wow such charmers. But in all honesty what is more important to me than looks is personality. As cliched as it sounds i am turned off by profiles that say i am desperate for cock and other comments of a similar ilk. Also if they have 165 published verifications i worry that im at the back of a long queue playing russian roulette with my sexual health. Long profiles which tell me all the ways i tick there boxes and then rule me out with the last comment, love them too.
So, you wouldnt be 'risking' your sexual health if you met people from outside Fab?
Because they're all virgins, of course?
If i meet somebody who admits to having 165 previous partners i would consider id be risking my sexual health. They are not exclusive to either scenario. BTW this also applies to either gender. So no sexisn inferred here.
My point was you have no idea about anyone's sexual history.
Or the sexual history of their previous partners
Tell me, by looking at my profile, can you tell how many people I have fucked?
10?
20?
50?
And what about the person that wrote my one published veri?
Has he been faithful to one partner for 20 years?
Or not?"
Okay i obviously said something inflammatory. Sorry. What i was trying to say is that an overtly sexual name combined with an update asking for anonymous sex combined with hundreds of verifications is off putting. Yes I worry that ill catch something. I always practiced safe sex yet still with my small number of partners ive been infected before. Nothing a course of antibiotics cant cure but still it happened so i think twice as there is worse things out there i like to be careful. However that is my opinion it is neither right or wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards.
I get lots of guys asking me to meet now
I reply " but you dont even know what i look like"
Very often, they come back with " I dont care"
Or nonsense like " your tits look nice, so i figure the rest of you will be too"
Bless 'em
Wow such charmers. But in all honesty what is more important to me than looks is personality. As cliched as it sounds i am turned off by profiles that say i am desperate for cock and other comments of a similar ilk. Also if they have 165 published verifications i worry that im at the back of a long queue playing russian roulette with my sexual health. Long profiles which tell me all the ways i tick there boxes and then rule me out with the last comment, love them too.
So, you wouldnt be 'risking' your sexual health if you met people from outside Fab?
Because they're all virgins, of course?
If i meet somebody who admits to having 165 previous partners i would consider id be risking my sexual health. They are not exclusive to either scenario. BTW this also applies to either gender. So no sexisn inferred here.
My point was you have no idea about anyone's sexual history.
Or the sexual history of their previous partners
Tell me, by looking at my profile, can you tell how many people I have fucked?
10?
20?
50?
And what about the person that wrote my one published veri?
Has he been faithful to one partner for 20 years?
Or not?
Okay i obviously said something inflammatory. Sorry. What i was trying to say is that an overtly sexual name combined with an update asking for anonymous sex combined with hundreds of verifications is off putting. Yes I worry that ill catch something. I always practiced safe sex yet still with my small number of partners ive been infected before. Nothing a course of antibiotics cant cure but still it happened so i think twice as there is worse things out there i like to be careful. However that is my opinion it is neither right or wrong."
You dont have to apologise!
I was just trying to illustrate that what you read on here isnt always the full picture
And that just as people lie in the outside world, they also could be economical with the truth on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm so bored on here
Makes it all that much harder when women start getting more selective and picky
And that is why you will struggle here.
You fall below the standards expected of you.
That applies to both men and women on here, rem_mber it’s not just the women who set standards.
I get lots of guys asking me to meet now
I reply " but you dont even know what i look like"
Very often, they come back with " I dont care"
Or nonsense like " your tits look nice, so i figure the rest of you will be too"
Bless 'em
Wow such charmers. But in all honesty what is more important to me than looks is personality. As cliched as it sounds i am turned off by profiles that say i am desperate for cock and other comments of a similar ilk. Also if they have 165 published verifications i worry that im at the back of a long queue playing russian roulette with my sexual health. Long profiles which tell me all the ways i tick there boxes and then rule me out with the last comment, love them too.
So, you wouldnt be 'risking' your sexual health if you met people from outside Fab?
Because they're all virgins, of course?
If i meet somebody who admits to having 165 previous partners i would consider id be risking my sexual health. They are not exclusive to either scenario. BTW this also applies to either gender. So no sexisn inferred here.
My point was you have no idea about anyone's sexual history.
Or the sexual history of their previous partners
Tell me, by looking at my profile, can you tell how many people I have fucked?
10?
20?
50?
And what about the person that wrote my one published veri?
Has he been faithful to one partner for 20 years?
Or not?
Okay i obviously said something inflammatory. Sorry. What i was trying to say is that an overtly sexual name combined with an update asking for anonymous sex combined with hundreds of verifications is off putting. Yes I worry that ill catch something. I always practiced safe sex yet still with my small number of partners ive been infected before. Nothing a course of antibiotics cant cure but still it happened so i think twice as there is worse things out there i like to be careful. However that is my opinion it is neither right or wrong."
The very fact that you have picked something up, after only having a small number of partners, proves my point perfectly
And makes your logic look slightly skewed. |
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"OP..please just go.
You clearly do not understand what swinging is about, and your expectations will never be met.
I wish you well in 2020.
This exactly FAB is a swingers site. That’s what many single males don’t respect.
I think fab can be used however you wish to use it. I’m not a swinger and I use it for occasional sex"
I agree! I’m well beyond the boundaries the self-righteous ‘real’ swingers like to operate within, and I do very well in Fab thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OP..please just go.
You clearly do not understand what swinging is about, and your expectations will never be met.
I wish you well in 2020.
This exactly FAB is a swingers site. That’s what many single males don’t respect.
I think fab can be used however you wish to use it. I’m not a swinger and I use it for occasional sex
I agree! I’m well beyond the boundaries the self-righteous ‘real’ swingers like to operate within, and I do very well in Fab thank you "
Yep same here |
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"Yup, as the title says. Been using the site for a while, ive come and gone over the years. Seem to be getting completely unnoticed by the women here these days. I know i aint ugly, i dont act like a cocky jerk, try to be as respectful as i can, no lack of confidence, can hold a conversation especially an intellectual one, and humour isnt something i struggle with either... whats gives?
Seems all i get now is a spammed inbox by men which ive taken to blocking now cos ive been getting tired of it.
I also recently got back with my ex after she came to me asking to give things another go, i aint too sure about it but ill see where it goes. Shes fine about me wanting to go swinging, came out to me she was polyamorous recently, but at this rate im just thinking "screw fab theres pussy right here for me i dont have to waste my energy messaging women on a whim"
Idk... i like to have fun and fool around with ppl, and theres no guarantee id be up for the old shit i put up with from the ex, but why try tending to a plant if it wont bare any fruit? And if things dont work out with the ex, perhaps im just better off just putting my spare energy into one person and see if it grows into something...
What do i do ppl?"
You are so 100% right |
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