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That dare not speak its name...
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? " Go with the flow ...is a relationship really such a bad thing  ...unless of course you are already in a relationship and are playing behind another’s back... | |||
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Or just accept life as it unfolds. Who knows where it may lead? | |||
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"Masterbate" Is that like masturbating? Or is it some master/servant role play thing... | |||
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"Masterbate Is that like masturbating? Or is it some master/servant role play thing... " Go with your heart x | |||
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"You communicate openly and honestly and enjoy yourselves, care for eachother and have some great sex! " Exactly this  | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Go with the flow ...is a relationship really such a bad thing ...unless of course you are already in a relationship and are playing behind another’s back..."I've believed for a long time that feelings are a dirty word on fab, less so now but still frowned on. I agree with you personally but I'm curious as to others thoughts | |||
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"Masterbate Is that like masturbating? Or is it some master/servant role play thing... Go with your heart x" Go with yr heart but also keep yr head and hope the chemical imbalances of falling in love keep u on a steady path | |||
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"Why deny what is normal and human. People feel. Shock horror stop the presses.
Or just accept life as it unfolds. Who knows where it may lead?"Would you declare your feelings though? Yes people feel but would you hide them? | |||
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"You communicate openly and honestly and enjoy yourselves, care for eachother and have some great sex! " Nice! Good plan! | |||
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"Masterbate Is that like masturbating? Or is it some master/servant role play thing... Go with your heart x Go with yr heart but also keep yr head and hope the chemical imbalances of falling in love keep u on a steady path "Head vs heart is always a difficult line to walk at the best of times, how would you deal with the contradictory urges? | |||
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"Go for a brisk run around the playing fields followed by a cold shower and a quiet word with yourself "So you'd ignore the feelings? | |||
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"I try to find subtley find out if she feels same by teasing her that she does until she admits it then tell her if she does feel that way and have a chat about whats next stay same as we are or next level like a couple grown ups " I take it that that was your path? | |||
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"People connect on a multitude of levels here. As long as you’re both open and on the same page then crack on and enjoy. " Is that what you'd do? | |||
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"People connect on a multitude of levels here. As long as you’re both open and on the same page then crack on and enjoy. Is that what you'd do? " Yes. It’s not about anyone else. Do what’s best for you. | |||
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"People connect on a multitude of levels here. As long as you’re both open and on the same page then crack on and enjoy. Is that what you'd do? Yes. It’s not about anyone else. Do what’s best for you. " Very sane and healthy advice, for some though, what's best sometimes throws up a lot of fear and trepidation of hurt. Self preservation often feels a lot like 'what's best' | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? " Are we both single? Are feelings an illness now? | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Go with the flow ...is a relationship really such a bad thing ...unless of course you are already in a relationship and are playing behind another’s back...
I've believed for a long time that feelings are a dirty word on fab, less so now but still frowned on.
I agree with you personally but I'm curious as to others thoughts "Why? Will it make you change your mind? Lol | |||
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"This is why I’m lucky I’m boring and bad in bed. I’d tell him/her but prepare yourself That it might not be the answer you want xx" Honesty, always a good plan! I think that knowing either way is the best option, not saying and not knowing is a worse situation. Schrodingers cat of emotions; you have to open the box to know | |||
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"People connect on a multitude of levels here. As long as you’re both open and on the same page then crack on and enjoy. Is that what you'd do? Yes. It’s not about anyone else. Do what’s best for you. Very sane and healthy advice, for some though, what's best sometimes throws up a lot of fear and trepidation of hurt. Self preservation often feels a lot like 'what's best' " The situation is what it is. You either enjoy it or blow it up. You’re only here once. | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Are we both single? Are feelings an illness now?" In your situation. To many I think they are, yes. | |||
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"I try to find subtley find out if she feels same by teasing her that she does until she admits it then tell her if she does feel that way and have a chat about whats next stay same as we are or next level like a couple grown ups I take it that that was your path? " that was the path yes iv no other experience to use | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Go with the flow ...is a relationship really such a bad thing ...unless of course you are already in a relationship and are playing behind another’s back...
I've believed for a long time that feelings are a dirty word on fab, less so now but still frowned on.
I agree with you personally but I'm curious as to others thoughts
Why? Will it make you change your mind? Lol" this situation isn't about me, I'm not asking for me or a friend.
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"I’ve been there sort of. I was open about them as were they. We went our separate ways." I think that being honest is the best option, as I just posted ^^ at least you know | |||
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"Im kind of in this situation now .. met him in a club 12 months ago ..we just connected right from the off.. Unsure to say how i feel incase its not how he feels ..could spoil what we have already x" I understand that, he could feel the same way and make it better though... I can see the conflict there though | |||
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"Why deny what is normal and human. People feel. Shock horror stop the presses.
Or just accept life as it unfolds. Who knows where it may lead?
Would you declare your feelings though? Yes people feel but would you hide them? "If we hide what we feel, build barriers against our emotions we deny ourselves opportunities of discovering much about both ourselves and others. Hiding our emotions isnt that just dishonest, contrary to our humanity and a recipe for living a type of lie that denies us all the richness of sharing our lives with others? Lifes not a game where we manipulate ourselves and others unless that's how people choose to live. It's a game I have no interest in at all. Those emotions that people seem to fear sometimes, they are what fill our life with all its richness. | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Are we both single? Are feelings an illness now? In your situation. To many I think they are, yes. " In our situation? You mean one party is married to someone else? If feelings are an illness there isn't a cure, you can only live with them. How you live with them is down to you. | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Go with the flow ...is a relationship really such a bad thing ...unless of course you are already in a relationship and are playing behind another’s back...
I've believed for a long time that feelings are a dirty word on fab, less so now but still frowned on.
I agree with you personally but I'm curious as to others thoughts "Who cares what fab thinks If it works for you both then go with it. Just be open because one sided feelings aren't good x | |||
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"I'd say it depends on the individual circumstances - there are far too many variables to consider for a one size fits all answer. " In your individual circumstances, in the situation as I phrased it; what would you do? | |||
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"Why deny what is normal and human. People feel. Shock horror stop the presses.
Or just accept life as it unfolds. Who knows where it may lead?
Would you declare your feelings though? Yes people feel but would you hide them?
If we hide what we feel, build barriers against our emotions we deny ourselves opportunities of discovering much about both ourselves and others.
Hiding our emotions isnt that just dishonest, contrary to our humanity and a recipe for living a type of lie that denies us all the richness of sharing our lives with others?
Lifes not a game where we manipulate ourselves and others unless that's how people choose to live. It's a game I have no interest in at all.
Those emotions that people seem to fear sometimes, they are what fill our life with all its richness."I agree with you completely | |||
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"People connect on a multitude of levels here. As long as both my legs open then crack on and enjoy. " Naughty  | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Are we both single? Are feelings an illness now? In your situation. To many I think they are, yes. In our situation? You mean one party is married to someone else? If feelings are an illness there isn't a cure, you can only live with them. How you live with them is down to you." Yes. I'm not asking for advice on what to do, I'm asking how others would react | |||
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"People connect on a multitude of levels here. As long as both my legs open then crack on and enjoy. Naughty " | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? " It depends.. If I thought he felt the same, then I'd say something. If he didn't, I'd keep quiet. Rather carry on enjoying things the way they are, than risk loosing it, by saying something. | |||
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"People connect on a multitude of levels here. As long as both my legs open then crack on and enjoy. Naughty
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many oukslevels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? " best thing would be to walk away | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Go with the flow ...is a relationship really such a bad thing ...unless of course you are already in a relationship and are playing behind another’s back...
I've believed for a long time that feelings are a dirty word on fab, less so now but still frowned on.
I agree with you personally but I'm curious as to others thoughts
Who cares what fab thinks
If it works for you both then go with it. Just be open because one sided feelings aren't good x"I care what others think, hence the question
This isn't a roundabout way to ask for advice, I'm asking what others think and how they'd react in the situation. A litmus emotional test if you will.
I agree that one sided emotions aren't healthy though
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"I'm keeping it to myself and just enjoying it for what it is at the moment, great sex and having a good time together. " So you're in this type of situation? Why not say how you're feeling? | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? " Sounds delicious OP ! .. I'd probably have a wee panic first then get hold of myself.. observe, feel into the feelings and check how it feels in my gut. I tend to know whether the feelings are there as part of my personal journey or if they are meant to be shared with the other person .. with no expectation and a big brave breath. X | |||
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"Think too many people deny or over think and therefore don't enjoy things " I agree with both of your posts. Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing though | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? It depends.. If I thought he felt the same, then I'd say something. If he didn't, I'd keep quiet. Rather carry on enjoying things the way they are, than risk loosing it, by saying something. " So it's dependent on the other person? They could be hiding their feelings too... | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many oukslevels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? best thing would be to walk away" How so? | |||
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"Run away. Leave the country if you have too. Avoid relationshudders at all costs. Join a monastery or Covent Go unlos come back as someone else. Nothing too knee jerk but get the hell out here of there " Is Devon an emotion free zone then? | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Sounds delicious OP ! .. I'd probably have a wee panic first then get hold of myself.. observe, feel into the feelings and check how it feels in my gut. I tend to know whether the feelings are there as part of my personal journey or if they are meant to be shared with the other person .. with no expectation and a big brave breath. X " That's an interesting response. How do you mean the difference between part of your personal journey or to be shared? | |||
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"Run away. Leave the country if you have too. Avoid relationshudders at all costs. Join a monastery or Covent Go unlos come back as someone else. Nothing too knee jerk but get the hell out here of there Is Devon an emotion free zone then? " No it’s just me. I am sure some people in Devon have feelings, but to truly take over the world I must become immune to such frivolous things. | |||
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"This is why I’m lucky I’m boring and bad in bed. I’d tell him/her but prepare yourself That it might not be the answer you want xx Honesty, always a good plan! I think that knowing either way is the best option, not saying and not knowing is a worse situation. Schrodingers cat of emotions; you have to open the box to know" Exactly this. You need to know. To not know is more painful than it not being the answer you want. | |||
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"I try to find subtley find out if she feels same by teasing her that she does until she admits it then tell her if she does feel that way and have a chat about whats next stay same as we are or next level like a couple grown ups " Um... like grownups? | |||
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"I try to find subtley find out if she feels same by teasing her that she does until she admits it then tell her if she does feel that way and have a chat about whats next stay same as we are or next level like a couple grown ups Um... like grownups?" issue? | |||
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"Run away. Leave the country if you have too. Avoid relationshudders at all costs. Join a monastery or Covent Go unlos come back as someone else. Nothing too knee jerk but get the hell out here of there Is Devon an emotion free zone then? No it’s just me. I am sure some people in Devon have feelings, but to truly take over the world I must become immune to such frivolous things. " Very sensible, purity of body, purity of mind. The world won't see it coming. Unless they read the forums, then you're screwed. | |||
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"This is why I’m lucky I’m boring and bad in bed. I’d tell him/her but prepare yourself That it might not be the answer you want xx Honesty, always a good plan! I think that knowing either way is the best option, not saying and not knowing is a worse situation. Schrodingers cat of emotions; you have to open the box to know Exactly this. You need to know. To not know is more painful than it not being the answer you want. " Definitely. Heartbreak can be gotten over, the taint of 'what if' is awful. | |||
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"Suggest meeting couples together. I would wanna see her pleased "So skip the emotions and straight into swinging? | |||
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"Run away. Leave the country if you have too. Avoid relationshudders at all costs. Join a monastery or Covent Go unlos come back as someone else. Nothing too knee jerk but get the hell out here of there Is Devon an emotion free zone then? No it’s just me. I am sure some people in Devon have feelings, but to truly take over the world I must become immune to such frivolous things. Very sensible, purity of body, purity of mind. The world won't see it coming. Unless they read the forums, then you're screwed. " You think THIS is ME? oh you poor soul. Rem_mber dangermouse? Rem_mber Baron Greenback.... think along those lines. I am actually a 27 year old woman with spunk (and a passing resemblance to a turtle) | |||
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"Go with it. Sometimes it works out perfectly. The risk is worth it. B&J x" I agree | |||
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"Panic and run knowing me. Unless they felt it too and i felt that they felt it. Then a conversation would happen probably. But only if they broached the subject first. " So you'd keep quiet unless they said something? | |||
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"Suggest meeting couples together. I would wanna see her pleased
So skip the emotions and straight into swinging? "Sex ain’t gonna effect my emotions | |||
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"Think too many people deny or over think and therefore don't enjoy things I agree with both of your posts. Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing though" Our life is always unknown. We cannot see tomorrow. To live our lives in fear because of what we cannot possibly know is the future, is that a life half lived? | |||
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"Run away. Leave the country if you have too. Avoid relationshudders at all costs. Join a monastery or Covent Go unlos come back as someone else. Nothing too knee jerk but get the hell out here of there Is Devon an emotion free zone then? No it’s just me. I am sure some people in Devon have feelings, but to truly take over the world I must become immune to such frivolous things. Very sensible, purity of body, purity of mind. The world won't see it coming. Unless they read the forums, then you're screwed. You think THIS is ME? oh you poor soul. Rem_mber dangermouse? Rem_mber Baron Greenback.... think along those lines. I am actually a 27 year old woman with spunk (and a passing resemblance to a turtle) " I was picturing you more as Brain with Pinky at your side... | |||
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"Run away. Leave the country if you have too. Avoid relationshudders at all costs. Join a monastery or Covent Go unlos come back as someone else. Nothing too knee jerk but get the hell out here of there Is Devon an emotion free zone then? No it’s just me. I am sure some people in Devon have feelings, but to truly take over the world I must become immune to such frivolous things. Very sensible, purity of body, purity of mind. The world won't see it coming. Unless they read the forums, then you're screwed. You think THIS is ME? oh you poor soul. Rem_mber dangermouse? Rem_mber Baron Greenback.... think along those lines. I am actually a 27 year old woman with spunk (and a passing resemblance to a turtle) I was picturing you more as Brain with Pinky at your side... " See now you are second guessing my anonymity is preserved. Touché away...... Oh shit | |||
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"Honesty is always best in any situation xx" I agree. So you'd say something? | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? It depends.. If I thought he felt the same, then I'd say something. If he didn't, I'd keep quiet. Rather carry on enjoying things the way they are, than risk loosing it, by saying something. So it's dependent on the other person? They could be hiding their feelings too... " For me yes. They could be, and that's the tough part. You could both feel the same, but too scared to say something for fear of rejection. | |||
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"Think too many people deny or over think and therefore don't enjoy things I agree with both of your posts. Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing though Our life is always unknown. We cannot see tomorrow. To live our lives in fear because of what we cannot possibly know is the future, is that a life half lived?" Indeed. So is to dwell in the past. | |||
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"Run away. Leave the country if you have too. Avoid relationshudders at all costs. Join a monastery or Covent Go unlos come back as someone else. Nothing too knee jerk but get the hell out here of there Is Devon an emotion free zone then? No it’s just me. I am sure some people in Devon have feelings, but to truly take over the world I must become immune to such frivolous things. Very sensible, purity of body, purity of mind. The world won't see it coming. Unless they read the forums, then you're screwed. You think THIS is ME? oh you poor soul. Rem_mber dangermouse? Rem_mber Baron Greenback.... think along those lines. I am actually a 27 year old woman with spunk (and a passing resemblance to a turtle) I was picturing you more as Brain with Pinky at your side... See now you are second guessing my anonymity is preserved. Touché away...... Oh shit " | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? It depends.. If I thought he felt the same, then I'd say something. If he didn't, I'd keep quiet. Rather carry on enjoying things the way they are, than risk loosing it, by saying something. So it's dependent on the other person? They could be hiding their feelings too... For me yes. They could be, and that's the tough part. You could both feel the same, but too scared to say something for fear of rejection. " Exactly! Someone has to break the stalemate | |||
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"Honesty is always best in any situation xx I agree. So you'd say something? " Yes, absolutely xx | |||
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"Honesty is always best in any situation xx I agree. So you'd say something? Yes, absolutely xx" OK, I had you down as an 'elephant in the room' type... | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? It depends.. If I thought he felt the same, then I'd say something. If he didn't, I'd keep quiet. Rather carry on enjoying things the way they are, than risk loosing it, by saying something. So it's dependent on the other person? They could be hiding their feelings too... For me yes. They could be, and that's the tough part. You could both feel the same, but too scared to say something for fear of rejection. Exactly! Someone has to break the stalemate " Yes, and no! Unless I was 100% certain of how that person felt. I wouldn't. As I've said, I'd rather carry on, enjoying things the way they are, than take a gamble & lose everything | |||
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"I'd say it depends on the individual circumstances - there are far too many variables to consider for a one size fits all answer. In your individual circumstances, in the situation as I phrased it; what would you do? " In my personal circumstances I would tell the person that I was very fond of them, and have an adult conversation about the situation and how we proceed. | |||
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"Think too many people deny or over think and therefore don't enjoy things I agree with both of your posts. Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing though Our life is always unknown. We cannot see tomorrow. To live our lives in fear because of what we cannot possibly know is the future, is that a life half lived? Indeed. So is to dwell in the past. " The past has gone. It cannot be changed, yet if it could then perhaps... We have only today and if we are lucky whatever tomorrow's we are granted. | |||
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"Honesty is always best in any situation xx I agree. So you'd say something? Yes, absolutely xx OK, I had you down as an 'elephant in the room' type... "Ok. Yeah. I probably am but at some point I would say something..
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"Look without unrequited love and insecurities over “friendships” there would be very little music or poetry. Some of the greatest novels in the world would not have been written and most films would end after 30 minutes. Man up and suffer in tortured silence, it is the torment that nurtures a soul, it is the unknowing that makes the heart race. Now go and paint your bedroom black and walk across a windswept moor (Heath, beach or down is acceptable) " That's very true, although in those epic tales of tortured love, didn't one or both end up dead? I'm just asking because black is quite expensive and the nearest Moor is about 30 miles away... | |||
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"I'd say it depends on the individual circumstances - there are far too many variables to consider for a one size fits all answer. In your individual circumstances, in the situation as I phrased it; what would you do? In my personal circumstances I would tell the person that I was very fond of them, and have an adult conversation about the situation and how we proceed. " That sounds very healthy | |||
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"Honesty is always best in any situation xx I agree. So you'd say something? Yes, absolutely xx OK, I had you down as an 'elephant in the room' type...
Ok. Yeah. I probably am but at some point I would say something..
"After the birth of your second child together? | |||
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"As long as your both single just go for it and enjoy " That's very much my thought process. I think that life is often only as complicated as you make it. | |||
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"Look without unrequited love and insecurities over “friendships” there would be very little music or poetry. Some of the greatest novels in the world would not have been written and most films would end after 30 minutes. Man up and suffer in tortured silence, it is the torment that nurtures a soul, it is the unknowing that makes the heart race. Now go and paint your bedroom black and walk across a windswept moor (Heath, beach or down is acceptable) That's very true, although in those epic tales of tortured love, didn't one or both end up dead? I'm just asking because black is quite expensive and the nearest Moor is about 30 miles away... " It’s okay. I like the stalling tactics and pontificating that you are doing. You’re nearly there. Compose a sonnet and call it job done. | |||
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Good luck whichever way you go with it.
S | |||
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"Look without unrequited love and insecurities over “friendships” there would be very little music or poetry. Some of the greatest novels in the world would not have been written and most films would end after 30 minutes. Man up and suffer in tortured silence, it is the torment that nurtures a soul, it is the unknowing that makes the heart race. Now go and paint your bedroom black and walk across a windswept moor (Heath, beach or down is acceptable) That's very true, although in those epic tales of tortured love, didn't one or both end up dead? I'm just asking because black is quite expensive and the nearest Moor is about 30 miles away... It’s okay. I like the stalling tactics and pontificating that you are doing. You’re nearly there. Compose a sonnet and call it job done. " Do I need a rapier and pistol to commit an act of passionate suicide, ruffled shirt to rend apart in wild heartbreak? I'm new to all this stuff, I usually just say what's on my mind... | |||
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"In my personal circumstances I would tell the person that I was very fond of them, and have an adult conversation about the situation and how we proceed. That sounds very healthy " I'm very pragmatic. And I don't tell people I love them unless I absolutely mean it (family included)...I can have a lot of fondness and respect for someone without believing it to be love. | |||
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"Honesty is always best in any situation xx I agree. So you'd say something? Yes, absolutely xx OK, I had you down as an 'elephant in the room' type...
Ok. Yeah. I probably am but at some point I would say something..
After the birth of your second child together? "Thatd be a miracle! | |||
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"OP There are many differing types on this site. Many say they are swingers when quite patently they are not & are really only after "The One". Obviously they have to meet numbers two-whatever before they think they've found them. Others are swingers or at least experimenting with their sexuality but that's not to say if the one came along they wouldn't knock it on the head or maybe swing with that significant other. I'd say the first thing you need to do is make sure you know for sure what camp this person sits in before saying anything at all as spouting undying love could end everything, especially if they've been there & done that & been kicked where it hurts. Oh & if you really want a head fuck, Go Poly together get a second lady involved & have them think the same as you to one of you only....
Good luck whichever way you go with it.
S"Ouch! Yes, I can imagine that with poly arrangements, any issues increase exponentially! | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? It depends.. If I thought he felt the same, then I'd say something. If he didn't, I'd keep quiet. Rather carry on enjoying things the way they are, than risk loosing it, by saying something. " | |||
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"Honesty is always best in any situation xx I agree. So you'd say something? Yes, absolutely xx OK, I had you down as an 'elephant in the room' type...
Ok. Yeah. I probably am but at some point I would say something..
After the birth of your second child together?
Thatd be a miracle! " | |||
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"Go for a brisk run around the playing fields followed by a cold shower and a quiet word with yourself
So you'd ignore the feelings? "It would depend on whether I could tell if they would be reciprocated, if I didn't think they were then I'd keep them to myself and not open myself up to getting hurt | |||
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"Look without unrequited love and insecurities over “friendships” there would be very little music or poetry. Some of the greatest novels in the world would not have been written and most films would end after 30 minutes. Man up and suffer in tortured silence, it is the torment that nurtures a soul, it is the unknowing that makes the heart race. Now go and paint your bedroom black and walk across a windswept moor (Heath, beach or down is acceptable) That's very true, although in those epic tales of tortured love, didn't one or both end up dead? I'm just asking because black is quite expensive and the nearest Moor is about 30 miles away... It’s okay. I like the stalling tactics and pontificating that you are doing. You’re nearly there. Compose a sonnet and call it job done. Do I need a rapier and pistol to commit an act of passionate suicide, ruffled shirt to rend apart in wild heartbreak? I'm new to all this stuff, I usually just say what's on my mind... " Well for chuffs sake man what was the point of the post then!! I’m a busy man (girl, potentially turtle) don’t be throwing dilemmas out there that I feel honour bound to assist with and then say “well I just speak my mind” Seriously. | |||
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"Look without unrequited love and insecurities over “friendships” there would be very little music or poetry. Some of the greatest novels in the world would not have been written and most films would end after 30 minutes. Man up and suffer in tortured silence, it is the torment that nurtures a soul, it is the unknowing that makes the heart race. Now go and paint your bedroom black and walk across a windswept moor (Heath, beach or down is acceptable) That's very true, although in those epic tales of tortured love, didn't one or both end up dead? I'm just asking because black is quite expensive and the nearest Moor is about 30 miles away... It’s okay. I like the stalling tactics and pontificating that you are doing. You’re nearly there. Compose a sonnet and call it job done. Do I need a rapier and pistol to commit an act of passionate suicide, ruffled shirt to rend apart in wild heartbreak? I'm new to all this stuff, I usually just say what's on my mind... Well for chuffs sake man what was the point of the post then!! I’m a busy man (girl, potentially turtle) don’t be throwing dilemmas out there that I feel honour bound to assist with and then say “well I just speak my mind” Seriously. "As a fully paid up m_mber of the internal justice league of justice, it's my duty to distract you from your nefarious activities until the agents arrive. Which should be about... now... | |||
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"I would talk to them and see where they're at. I'm not here looking for a relationship but I am single and only meet singles so I wouldn't shy away or try to bury my feelings, they're natural and wonderful things if reciprocated. As others have said I'd rather know than be left wondering what if. " I agree whole heartedly | |||
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"Chance would be a fine thing.. not met anyone worth a second meet yet! Are there any?" I can't speak for others, I'm sure there are a few knocking around! | |||
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"Suppress and try to get over the feelings. If that failed, block and run like hell. " Why? | |||
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"Chance would be a fine thing.. not met anyone worth a second meet yet! Are there any? I can't speak for others, I'm sure there are a few knocking around! " Shall we start a search party?  | |||
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"Chance would be a fine thing.. not met anyone worth a second meet yet! Are there any?" Absolutely. I've met my last 2 girlfriends through this site. You just have to take the time to speak to the right people. Fab has become severely unfriendly due to the idiotic men on here, sending repeated crap messages and photos of their dicks. As a result, women are overloaded and the guys who are genuine and well meaning in their messaging get ignored. It's a vicious circle, in the main created by men. | |||
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"Chance would be a fine thing.. not met anyone worth a second meet yet! Are there any? Absolutely. I've met my last 2 girlfriends through this site. You just have to take the time to speak to the right people. Fab has become severely unfriendly due to the idiotic men on here, sending repeated crap messages and photos of their dicks. As a result, women are overloaded and the guys who are genuine and well meaning in their messaging get ignored. It's a vicious circle, in the main created by men." That's a whooooole other thread there fella and one that's visited at least once a day, I'm sure one will be along soon! | |||
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"Chance would be a fine thing.. not met anyone worth a second meet yet! Are there any? I can't speak for others, I'm sure there are a few knocking around! Shall we start a search party? "Are we starting in Hull? | |||
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"Look without unrequited love and insecurities over “friendships” there would be very little music or poetry. Some of the greatest novels in the world would not have been written and most films would end after 30 minutes. Man up and suffer in tortured silence, it is the torment that nurtures a soul, it is the unknowing that makes the heart race. Now go and paint your bedroom black and walk across a windswept moor (Heath, beach or down is acceptable) That's very true, although in those epic tales of tortured love, didn't one or both end up dead? I'm just asking because black is quite expensive and the nearest Moor is about 30 miles away... It’s okay. I like the stalling tactics and pontificating that you are doing. You’re nearly there. Compose a sonnet and call it job done. Do I need a rapier and pistol to commit an act of passionate suicide, ruffled shirt to rend apart in wild heartbreak? I'm new to all this stuff, I usually just say what's on my mind... Well for chuffs sake man what was the point of the post then!! I’m a busy man (girl, potentially turtle) don’t be throwing dilemmas out there that I feel honour bound to assist with and then say “well I just speak my mind” Seriously.
As a fully paid up m_mber of the internal justice league of justice, it's my duty to distract you from your nefarious activities until the agents arrive.
Which should be about... now...
"All your agents belong to me | |||
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"See if Florence is available, it is always best to go with Flo." Nicely done, I see what you did there | |||
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"Panic and run knowing me. Unless they felt it too and i felt that they felt it. Then a conversation would happen probably. But only if they broached the subject first. So you'd keep quiet unless they said something? " Yep. I’m an acquired taste, not many folk fall for me, so i’d keep schtum. And the only thing worse than unrequited love/feelings is a good friendship thing ruined. | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? " The huge variety of needs being met by fab leads to many different personalities being present, each with their own agendas. I’d sit down and talk to the other to see if you’re both on the same page. If so, let it flow naturally. If not, more talking necessary | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Sounds delicious OP ! .. I'd probably have a wee panic first then get hold of myself.. observe, feel into the feelings and check how it feels in my gut. I tend to know whether the feelings are there as part of my personal journey or if they are meant to be shared with the other person .. with no expectation and a big brave breath. X That's an interesting response. How do you mean the difference between part of your personal journey or to be shared? " My responses and feelings are my own experience and I sense into how/when to share depending on context, boundaries, relationship, nature of feelings. I love openess, honesty, awareness, curiosity .. I'm most likely to share. | |||
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"Chance would be a fine thing.. not met anyone worth a second meet yet! Are there any? Absolutely. I've met my last 2 girlfriends through this site. You just have to take the time to speak to the right people. Fab has become severely unfriendly due to the idiotic men on here, sending repeated crap messages and photos of their dicks. As a result, women are overloaded and the guys who are genuine and well meaning in their messaging get ignored. It's a vicious circle, in the main created by men. That's a whooooole other thread there fella and one that's visited at least once a day, I'm sure one will be along soon! " Fair point. Back to your point - honesty is the best policy. It's OK to feel something, but also I would offer up caution, since your relationship/feelings have come from something that was initially and purely physical attraction. Make sure you're not mistaking love for lust. | |||
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"Suppress and try to get over the feelings. If that failed, block and run like hell. Why? " Don't want love, don't do it, and if my feelings don't cooperate then I'll be forced to cut ties. | |||
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"I believe venturing into any kind of relationship territory should be a fully concious choice and decision. You should be able to weigh up to yourself "is this person good for me and do they compliment my personality?" Not necessarily go with the flow - but make sure you keep in mind traits/values/deal breakers that are important to you. Above all else though go with your gut feeling, any nagging weight you should listen to but if your gut instinct is telling you this is right, you're happy and healthy with this person then explore and see what happens. I'm just toying with the idea of the dating world now and the fear in the vanilla world is not having the same sexual preferences/kinks - I'd love to say Fab is a great place, it is but it's not somewhere you actively seek a relationship type of partner - sometimes it just happens" This is right. You can date through here as well though in my experience. Finding a human you actually like spending time with, have similar kinks to, and (in my case) enjoy openness is WAY easier here than in the dating world. My dating in recent years has been pretty pointless, and ended up just being about sex with no substance in reality. | |||
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"Look without unrequited love and insecurities over “friendships” there would be very little music or poetry. Some of the greatest novels in the world would not have been written and most films would end after 30 minutes. Man up and suffer in tortured silence, it is the torment that nurtures a soul, it is the unknowing that makes the heart race. Now go and paint your bedroom black and walk across a windswept moor (Heath, beach or down is acceptable) That's very true, although in those epic tales of tortured love, didn't one or both end up dead? I'm just asking because black is quite expensive and the nearest Moor is about 30 miles away... It’s okay. I like the stalling tactics and pontificating that you are doing. You’re nearly there. Compose a sonnet and call it job done. Do I need a rapier and pistol to commit an act of passionate suicide, ruffled shirt to rend apart in wild heartbreak? I'm new to all this stuff, I usually just say what's on my mind... Well for chuffs sake man what was the point of the post then!! I’m a busy man (girl, potentially turtle) don’t be throwing dilemmas out there that I feel honour bound to assist with and then say “well I just speak my mind” Seriously.
As a fully paid up m_mber of the internal justice league of justice, it's my duty to distract you from your nefarious activities until the agents arrive.
Which should be about... now...
All your agents belong to me"Curses | |||
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"Panic and run knowing me. Unless they felt it too and i felt that they felt it. Then a conversation would happen probably. But only if they broached the subject first. So you'd keep quiet unless they said something? Yep. I’m an acquired taste, not many folk fall for me, so i’d keep schtum. And the only thing worse than unrequited love/feelings is a good friendship thing ruined." I can see your point, I think I'd rather know and see where that went though | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? The huge variety of needs being met by fab leads to many different personalities being present, each with their own agendas. I’d sit down and talk to the other to see if you’re both on the same page. If so, let it flow naturally. If not, more talking necessary "That's a good point, although it's not about a situation I'm in though | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Sounds delicious OP ! .. I'd probably have a wee panic first then get hold of myself.. observe, feel into the feelings and check how it feels in my gut. I tend to know whether the feelings are there as part of my personal journey or if they are meant to be shared with the other person .. with no expectation and a big brave breath. X That's an interesting response. How do you mean the difference between part of your personal journey or to be shared? My responses and feelings are my own experience and I sense into how/when to share depending on context, boundaries, relationship, nature of feelings. I love openess, honesty, awareness, curiosity .. I'm most likely to share. " There is quite a degree of complexity regarding how and when, definitely. Especially based around the individual relationships dynamic | |||
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"Chance would be a fine thing.. not met anyone worth a second meet yet! Are there any? Absolutely. I've met my last 2 girlfriends through this site. You just have to take the time to speak to the right people. Fab has become severely unfriendly due to the idiotic men on here, sending repeated crap messages and photos of their dicks. As a result, women are overloaded and the guys who are genuine and well meaning in their messaging get ignored. It's a vicious circle, in the main created by men. That's a whooooole other thread there fella and one that's visited at least once a day, I'm sure one will be along soon! Fair point. Back to your point - honesty is the best policy. It's OK to feel something, but also I would offer up caution, since your relationship/feelings have come from something that was initially and purely physical attraction. Make sure you're not mistaking love for lust." A very valid point, it can be easy to mix the two up | |||
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"Suppress and try to get over the feelings. If that failed, block and run like hell. Why? Don't want love, don't do it, and if my feelings don't cooperate then I'll be forced to cut ties. " Again, why don't you do love? Not to cast judgement but that sounds very bleak... | |||
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"Suppress and try to get over the feelings. If that failed, block and run like hell. Why? Don't want love, don't do it, and if my feelings don't cooperate then I'll be forced to cut ties. Again, why don't you do love? Not to cast judgement but that sounds very bleak... " Not enough thread left to deal with my shit. I just don't | |||
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"I believe venturing into any kind of relationship territory should be a fully concious choice and decision. You should be able to weigh up to yourself "is this person good for me and do they compliment my personality?" Not necessarily go with the flow - but make sure you keep in mind traits/values/deal breakers that are important to you. Above all else though go with your gut feeling, any nagging weight you should listen to but if your gut instinct is telling you this is right, you're happy and healthy with this person then explore and see what happens. I'm just toying with the idea of the dating world now and the fear in the vanilla world is not having the same sexual preferences/kinks - I'd love to say Fab is a great place, it is but it's not somewhere you actively seek a relationship type of partner - sometimes it just happens" I agree to a certain degree. I think that a relationship should always be entered with your eyes open and I think that dependant on your history, it may be necessary to make a value judgement about another and what they potentially bring. On the flip side though, I think that I'm not as objective as that and have a degree of faith that anyone I'm wanting to be around will be a positive. As for vanilla dating, that's just as fraught when you add in sexual desires and histories! | |||
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"Oh not again Tea! "Shhhhh! | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Sounds delicious OP ! .. I'd probably have a wee panic first then get hold of myself.. observe, feel into the feelings and check how it feels in my gut. I tend to know whether the feelings are there as part of my personal journey or if they are meant to be shared with the other person .. with no expectation and a big brave breath. X That's an interesting response. How do you mean the difference between part of your personal journey or to be shared? My responses and feelings are my own experience and I sense into how/when to share depending on context, boundaries, relationship, nature of feelings. I love openess, honesty, awareness, curiosity .. I'm most likely to share. There is quite a degree of complexity regarding how and when, definitely. Especially based around the individual relationships dynamic" Trusting in the deeper sense .. what ever the outcome it'll be the right one for life, love n learning. | |||
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"What will be will be!! Be open, honest with depth let the love be in the hands of the gods. Xx" I agree with you | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Sounds delicious OP ! .. I'd probably have a wee panic first then get hold of myself.. observe, feel into the feelings and check how it feels in my gut. I tend to know whether the feelings are there as part of my personal journey or if they are meant to be shared with the other person .. with no expectation and a big brave breath. X That's an interesting response. How do you mean the difference between part of your personal journey or to be shared? My responses and feelings are my own experience and I sense into how/when to share depending on context, boundaries, relationship, nature of feelings. I love openess, honesty, awareness, curiosity .. I'm most likely to share. There is quite a degree of complexity regarding how and when, definitely. Especially based around the individual relationships dynamic Trusting in the deeper sense .. what ever the outcome it'll be the right one for life, love n learning. " Very true! | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? " I have only last week told Dave that I love my fuckbuddy. He was very understanding and said that people can't help who that fall in love with. It poses no threat to our relationship. | |||
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"Think too many people deny or over think and therefore don't enjoy things I agree with both of your posts. Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing though Our life is always unknown. We cannot see tomorrow. To live our lives in fear because of what we cannot possibly know is the future, is that a life half lived?" It's a personal choice .. still a life lived. What matters to me is how aware I am. Honouring the fear, wondering what it's pushing me to look at within myself .. Fear to me is like a highlighter pen or a torch showing me where to put my attention. But only when I'm ready. It's a dance. I find if I avoid fear .. Sooner or later life itself will just provide a situation where I have no choice but to deal with it ha! | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? I have only last week told Dave that I love my fuckbuddy. He was very understanding and said that people can't help who that fall in love with. It poses no threat to our relationship. " I imagine that that's a difficult situation (unless you're poly) and quite a different set of emotional responses from the situation I set out. It does sound as though it was about as positive as you could hope for though. Without prying; can I ask what the next step is for you both? | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? The huge variety of needs being met by fab leads to many different personalities being present, each with their own agendas. I’d sit down and talk to the other to see if you’re both on the same page. If so, let it flow naturally. If not, more talking necessary
That's a good point, although it's not about a situation I'm in though "Damn and there’s me hoping for an invite to the wedding... | |||
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"Think too many people deny or over think and therefore don't enjoy things I agree with both of your posts. Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing though Our life is always unknown. We cannot see tomorrow. To live our lives in fear because of what we cannot possibly know is the future, is that a life half lived? It's a personal choice .. still a life lived. What matters to me is how aware I am. Honouring the fear, wondering what it's pushing me to look at within myself .. Fear to me is like a highlighter pen or a torch showing me where to put my attention. But only when I'm ready. It's a dance. I find if I avoid fear .. Sooner or later life itself will just provide a situation where I have no choice but to deal with it ha! " As always; very self aware! I find that when I'm in a situation where I'm fearful, I evaluate why and where it comes from, then approach that fear and challenge it. As much as possible at any rate! | |||
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"So OP we all wanna know have you said something yet? "
This situation isn't about me. If it was, I'd do as I have done in the past; I'd say, own my feelings and let the dice fall as they may. | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? I have only last week told Dave that I love my fuckbuddy. He was very understanding and said that people can't help who that fall in love with. It poses no threat to our relationship. I imagine that that's a difficult situation (unless you're poly) and quite a different set of emotional responses from the situation I set out. It does sound as though it was about as positive as you could hope for though. Without prying; can I ask what the next step is for you both? " It wasn't difficult at all. The next step is for me to carry on seeing my FB and for life to carry on as normal with Dave. | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? The huge variety of needs being met by fab leads to many different personalities being present, each with their own agendas. I’d sit down and talk to the other to see if you’re both on the same page. If so, let it flow naturally. If not, more talking necessary
That's a good point, although it's not about a situation I'm in though
Damn and there’s me hoping for an invite to the wedding... "I hate to say never but me getting married is NEVER happening | |||
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"Think too many people deny or over think and therefore don't enjoy things I agree with both of your posts. Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing though Our life is always unknown. We cannot see tomorrow. To live our lives in fear because of what we cannot possibly know is the future, is that a life half lived?" I agree with you Hine but have found the majority of people I've ever had dealings with very much live small but happy or unhappy lives that will never cross a single line in fear of ...? I've never found out because I just jump in and have awesome adventures and feel that includes emotional adventures too | |||
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"So OP we all wanna know have you said something yet?
This situation isn't about me. If it was, I'd do as I have done in the past; I'd say, own my feelings and let the dice fall as they may. " | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? I have only last week told Dave that I love my fuckbuddy. He was very understanding and said that people can't help who that fall in love with. It poses no threat to our relationship. I imagine that that's a difficult situation (unless you're poly) and quite a different set of emotional responses from the situation I set out. It does sound as though it was about as positive as you could hope for though. Without prying; can I ask what the next step is for you both? It wasn't difficult at all. The next step is for me to carry on seeing my FB and for life to carry on as normal with Dave. " I'm glad that things are positive | |||
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"Think too many people deny or over think and therefore don't enjoy things I agree with both of your posts. Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing though Our life is always unknown. We cannot see tomorrow. To live our lives in fear because of what we cannot possibly know is the future, is that a life half lived? It's a personal choice .. still a life lived. What matters to me is how aware I am. Honouring the fear, wondering what it's pushing me to look at within myself .. Fear to me is like a highlighter pen or a torch showing me where to put my attention. But only when I'm ready. It's a dance. I find if I avoid fear .. Sooner or later life itself will just provide a situation where I have no choice but to deal with it ha! As always; very self aware! I find that when I'm in a situation where I'm fearful, I evaluate why and where it comes from, then approach that fear and challenge it. As much as possible at any rate! " Brave. Does it work? I found I'm better to first honour the fear rather than challenge it. look gently at what the fear is protecting. I cant always track it. But I trust my psyche to reveal all in good time .. eek! | |||
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"Think too many people deny or over think and therefore don't enjoy things I agree with both of your posts. Fear of the unknown is a powerful thing though Our life is always unknown. We cannot see tomorrow. To live our lives in fear because of what we cannot possibly know is the future, is that a life half lived? It's a personal choice .. still a life lived. What matters to me is how aware I am. Honouring the fear, wondering what it's pushing me to look at within myself .. Fear to me is like a highlighter pen or a torch showing me where to put my attention. But only when I'm ready. It's a dance. I find if I avoid fear .. Sooner or later life itself will just provide a situation where I have no choice but to deal with it ha! As always; very self aware! I find that when I'm in a situation where I'm fearful, I evaluate why and where it comes from, then approach that fear and challenge it. As much as possible at any rate! Brave. Does it work? I found I'm better to first honour the fear rather than challenge it. look gently at what the fear is protecting. I cant always track it. But I trust my psyche to reveal all in good time .. eek! " Brave or foolhardy! If something scares me, I often jump in with both feet (situation depending). | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? " me personally I would have to back off from him despite having feelings as I wouldnt want it to develop any further | |||
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"I'm keeping it to myself and just enjoying it for what it is at the moment, great sex and having a good time together. So you're in this type of situation? Why not say how you're feeling? " My situation is a little different as distance is a big factor. That's why I choose to enjoy it as it is now and not say anything. | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? me personally I would have to back off from him despite having feelings as I wouldnt want it to develop any further " Why not? | |||
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"I'm keeping it to myself and just enjoying it for what it is at the moment, great sex and having a good time together. So you're in this type of situation? Why not say how you're feeling? My situation is a little different as distance is a big factor. That's why I choose to enjoy it as it is now and not say anything." That makes sense. Personal circumstances can dictate these situations | |||
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"Why deny what is normal and human. People feel. Shock horror stop the presses.
Or just accept life as it unfolds. Who knows where it may lead?
Would you declare your feelings though? Yes people feel but would you hide them? "Yep, this happened to me, I told him, he had feelings for someone else so job done. No hard feelings on either side. I didn't want a relationship anyways so god knows how it would have worked out. | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? me personally I would have to back off from him despite having feelings as I wouldnt want it to develop any further Why not? " A relationship would mean I would have to make changes to my life. I'm not ready (yet) to do it | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? " Well now Im getting quite an expert at this falling in love (lust) lark. I tend to make it a bit obvious, how many toothbrushes can a person leave behind before a proposal
I tend to talk about it in a roundabout way, gauge the others reaction, the horror struck face normally gives me my answer so I can either suck it up and carry on having fun, both knowing thats what it is or strop off. I much prefer the fun, and who wants to be iñ love anyway, it all ends in tears. | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Well now Im getting quite an expert at this falling in love (lust) lark. I tend to make it a bit obvious, how many toothbrushes can a person leave behind before a proposal
I tend to talk about it in a roundabout way, gauge the others reaction, the horror struck face normally gives me my answer so I can either suck it up and carry on having fun, both knowing thats what it is or strop off. I much prefer the fun, and who wants to be iñ love anyway, it all ends in tears. "I like the being in lust bit | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? Well now Im getting quite an expert at this falling in love (lust) lark. I tend to make it a bit obvious, how many toothbrushes can a person leave behind before a proposal
I tend to talk about it in a roundabout way, gauge the others reaction, the horror struck face normally gives me my answer so I can either suck it up and carry on having fun, both knowing thats what it is or strop off. I much prefer the fun, and who wants to be iñ love anyway, it all ends in tears.
I like the being in lust bit "Me too, and Im learning I dont get to keep any of you, but its still all 'fun'  | |||
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"Oh not again Tea!
Shhhhh! "I'm so right. 
Honestly? I'd take some time away from the site and see if it's worth exploring. Am I the sort who is prone to catch the feels? Is the other person? That sort of alters things. Whatever you do, keep having lots of durty fun. | |||
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"There is a past I cannot change, a future that didnt pass my way. I told a girl I loved her. She told me I was nothing. I still think of her every day.... "  | |||
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"Why deny what is normal and human. People feel. Shock horror stop the presses.
Or just accept life as it unfolds. Who knows where it may lead?
Would you declare your feelings though? Yes people feel but would you hide them?
Yep, this happened to me, I told him, he had feelings for someone else so job done. No hard feelings on either side. I didn't want a relationship anyways so god knows how it would have worked out."Ive seen situations like yours develop into relationships, others not. The fact that you were clear is the key point | |||
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"Imagine the situation; you've met a fellow fabber a couple of times, you get on well and connect on many levels, talk most nights and the sex is amazing. Its not long before you realise that you've 'caught feelings' for the other. What would you do? me personally I would have to back off from him despite having feelings as I wouldnt want it to develop any further Why not? A relationship would mean I would have to make changes to my life. I'm not ready (yet) to do it " That makes sense. In my experience, life rarely happens when you're ready though | |||
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"I haven't read through the replies so apologies if I tread the path already covered. I believe it is always better to feel everything. We live a half-life if we inoculate ourselves to our own feelings and insulate ourselves from what others are feeling. That said, I'd advise cautious honesty. Take each day as it comes and let things evolve organically. As a terminally single person I know how fortunate it is for people to find someone special to connect with, whether temporarily or longer term. Don't take it for granted, dismiss it or think there will always be something better next time." Wonderfully phrased and very true. | |||
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"There is a past I cannot change, a future that didnt pass my way. I told a girl I loved her. She told me I was nothing. I still think of her every day.... " That doesn't sound a lot like not living in the past... | |||
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"There is a past I cannot change, a future that didnt pass my way. I told a girl I loved her. She told me I was nothing. I still think of her every day.... That doesn't sound a lot like not living in the past... " So who's perfect
I'm not living in the past, yet the past forms who we are today. If we dont learn from history we are destined to repeat it....
The past it cannot be changed. The future, well that's for each to choose. We can only choose our own futures and hope that others who touch us may be part of that....
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"Why deny what is normal and human. People feel. Shock horror stop the presses.
Or just accept life as it unfolds. Who knows where it may lead?
Would you declare your feelings though? Yes people feel but would you hide them?
Yep, this happened to me, I told him, he had feelings for someone else so job done. No hard feelings on either side. I didn't want a relationship anyways so god knows how it would have worked out.
Ive seen situations like yours develop into relationships, others not. The fact that you were clear is the key point"Yep, and because we talked about it, we have stayed mates and there's no hard feelings. | |||
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"It happened once, I would never let it happen again. I now have a heart of stone " Sister | |||
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"It happened once, I would never let it happen again. I now have a heart of stone " That's 100% your choice, it always makes me feel a little sad though when previous experiences then negatively colour future possibilities. Fear of being hurt is natural and healthy, letting it dictate every future choice is limiting your happiness. Thats my belief anyway. | |||
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