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Urge to be super dirty

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I literally haven't felt as horny as i am now for ages- i'm just trying to think or be as perverted as possible!!

Ive suddenly decided to see how far i can get a San Miguel bottle up my ass/ bearing in mind i've only ever been turned on by women- however right now- i want a massive cock in bed

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By *iss Penny TrationWoman  over a year ago

NW

Jesus

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

or you could shit the bed, thats dirty

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Hope your local A&E isn't too busy tonight.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Jesus"

Wept !

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Does it have to be San Miguel is there a relevance to that ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Be careful!!

I’m all for exploring fantasies and feeling a bit filthy but please be careful! Not to sound preachy but anything without a base to stop it getting sucked up, will inevitably be sucked up. It has a flat base that will stop you from being able to remove it if it does get stuck up there requiring a very urgent trip to A&E! And a glass bottle.... aside from getting stuck up there it could smash inside you, you could end up with a colostomy or dead. Get a dildo.

Not shaming you for exploring some inner kinks at all.... all power to you! But please do it safely xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Be careful!!

I’m all for exploring fantasies and feeling a bit filthy but please be careful! Not to sound preachy but anything without a base to stop it getting sucked up, will inevitably be sucked up. It has a flat base that will stop you from being able to remove it if it does get stuck up there requiring a very urgent trip to A&E! And a glass bottle.... aside from getting stuck up there it could smash inside you, you could end up with a colostomy or dead. Get a dildo.

Not shaming you for exploring some inner kinks at all.... all power to you! But please do it safely xx"

omg will never see a bottle of San Miguel the same again

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Chilled or warm ?

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By *hesterXXXMan  over a year ago

in your dreams


"Does it have to be San Miguel is there a relevance to that ? "

It's a protest against Brexit

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Or Spanish bets that shit he’s cutting out the middle man

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Chilled or warm ? "
chilled in warm out

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Carlsberg don't do buttplugs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Carlsberg don't do buttplugs"

But if they did...

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By *uHorny1Man  over a year ago

Cannock


"Carlsberg don't do buttplugs

But if they did..."

You stole my line!

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By *rAitchMan  over a year ago

Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe


"Jesus"

He ain't here, but his dad is.

Every time I walk into a pub, someone says "oh God, not you again!"

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By *a LunaWoman  over a year ago

South Wales

Just use a butt plug. It’s much safer

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I literally haven't felt as horny as i am now for ages- i'm just trying to think or be as perverted as possible!!

Ive suddenly decided to see how far i can get a San Miguel bottle up my ass/ bearing in mind i've only ever been turned on by women- however right now- i want a massive cock in bed"

Happens to us all darling!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Be careful!!

I’m all for exploring fantasies and feeling a bit filthy but please be careful! Not to sound preachy but anything without a base to stop it getting sucked up, will inevitably be sucked up. It has a flat base that will stop you from being able to remove it if it does get stuck up there requiring a very urgent trip to A&E! And a glass bottle.... aside from getting stuck up there it could smash inside you, you could end up with a colostomy or dead. Get a dildo.

Not shaming you for exploring some inner kinks at all.... all power to you! But please do it safely xx"

It has a flat base that will stop you from being able to remove it - I think you will find if it has a flat base you WILL BE ABLE TO REMOVE IT. Less anger, more accuracy

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bit late now but bottles are notoriously difficult to remove from assholes because a vacuum is created when it’s inserted bottleneck first.

Just buy a dildo or butt plug, please.

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By *oppolocosTV/TS  over a year ago

inverurie


"I literally haven't felt as horny as i am now for ages- i'm just trying to think or be as perverted as possible!!

Ive suddenly decided to see how far i can get a San Miguel bottle up my ass/ bearing in mind i've only ever been turned on by women- however right now- i want a massive cock in bed"

Just because you want to play with your bum, or fancy some cock doesn't make you gay or bi. Enjoy whatever you do and if you find you want more then go for it. If not then just buy a nice dildo for future use.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It has a flat base that will stop you from being able to remove it - I think you will find if it has a flat base you WILL BE ABLE TO REMOVE IT. Less anger, more accuracy"

No anger darling. Just being caring and offering advice (that’s more informed than you think of you cared to ask). Less anger, more kindness.

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By *rAitchMan  over a year ago

Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe

On the plus side, if you an unopened bottle, the crown cork will lance your Chalfonts on the way out.

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