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By *uckymoo OP   Man  over a year ago

Mid-Cheshire

I need a chuckle come on folks share

I’ll start....

2 snowmen in a field, first one turns to his mate and says...

“Here can you smell carrots?”

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By *uzukiNo1Woman  over a year ago

Rhyl

Meh..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Two zips in a desert. One says: "It's too hot". The other replies: "Unzip then".

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By *ed-monkeyCouple  over a year ago

Hailsham

Bear walks into a bar and says

"Can I have ...

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

a pint of ale please?"

The barman says "why the big pause?"

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By *uzukiNo1Woman  over a year ago

Rhyl


"Bear walks into a bar and says

"Can I have ...

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

a pint of ale please?"

The barman says "why the big pause?""

Titter

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What do you call a magician that’s lost his magic?

Ian

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By *ed-monkeyCouple  over a year ago

Hailsham


"What do you call a magician that’s lost his magic?

Ian "

Glib

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By *uzukiNo1Woman  over a year ago

Rhyl


"What do you call a magician that’s lost his magic?

Ian

Glib"

Gulp...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Knock knock

Who’s there?

Doorbell repair man

(I’ll get my coat)

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By *ackinabox19Man  over a year ago

Harrogate

Paddy walked into a bar and said ..... oww

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By *illyDudeMan  over a year ago

norh east

Why is B the coolest letter?

Because it's stuck between the A/C

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By *ed-monkeyCouple  over a year ago

Hailsham

Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman looks up and asks "Is this some sort of joke?"

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By *parkle1974Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball.....

She gagged

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By *uckymoo OP   Man  over a year ago

Mid-Cheshire


"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball.....

She gagged "

Winner hahaaaaaa

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By *parkle1974Woman  over a year ago

Leeds


"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball.....

She gagged

Winner hahaaaaaa"

Yay I never win

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By *ed-monkeyCouple  over a year ago

Hailsham


"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball.....

She gagged

Winner hahaaaaaa

Yay I never win "

Pfft .. 'cos you're a girl I say

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By *parkle1974Woman  over a year ago

Leeds


"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball.....

She gagged

Winner hahaaaaaa

Yay I never win

Pfft .. 'cos you're a girl I say"

And I thought it was because I was pretty

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By *ed-monkeyCouple  over a year ago

Hailsham


"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball.....

She gagged

Winner hahaaaaaa

Yay I never win

Pfft .. 'cos you're a girl I say

And I thought it was because I was pretty "

That's a given

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By *parkle1974Woman  over a year ago

Leeds


"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball.....

She gagged

Winner hahaaaaaa

Yay I never win

Pfft .. 'cos you're a girl I say

And I thought it was because I was pretty

That's a given "

Pffffftttttt

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man  over a year ago

BRIDPORT

My neighbour came around and asked if I knew anything about her underwear disappearing from her clothes line, she got really aggressive.

I can tell you, I nearly shit her pants.

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith

My wife thinks I have commitment issues.

Well, I say ‘wife’..........

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By *otrockWoman  over a year ago

Essex

Why are pirates called pirates..

Because they arrrrrr...

I know its a sad one but when my daughter says the punch line to me in her best pirate voice, makes me giggle every time.. Even thou I've heard it a trillion times..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Two condoms in the toilet pan

One says to the other you ok

The other replies nah pissed off !

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Hear about the Irish woodworm. It was found dead in a brick!

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By *irenGuy70Man  over a year ago

Cirencester

The nurse at the sperm bank asked me if I'd like to masturbate in the cup. I said, "Well, I'm pretty good, but I don't think I'm ready to compete just yet thanks".

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple  over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

For several years, a man was having an affair with an Italian woman. One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant.

Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child.

If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She tearfully agreed, but asked how to let him know when the baby was born.

To keep it discreet, he told her to simply mail him a postcard, and write “Spaghetti” on the back. He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin.

One day, about nine months later, he came home to his confused wife. “Honey,” she said, “you received a very strange postcard today.”

“Oh, just give it to me and I’ll explain it later,” he said.

The wife watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.

On the card was written:

“Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti.

“Three with meatballs, two without. Send extra sauce.”

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By *anysicoMan  over a year ago

cork

Very good, heard it before but still gets a winner for me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

How many Freudian's does it take to change a light bulb?

2

One to go up his step ladder

And the second one to hold his penis-sorry ladder, holds his ladder

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By *partharmonyCouple  over a year ago

Ruislip

What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?

Snowballs.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Three men go to heaven. St. Peter said 'you have to show a sign for xmas to enter.' so the Englishman shone his lighter and said 'look, candles!'

The Scotsman shook his keys and said 'look..jingle bells!' and Paddy shook a g string and St. Peter said 'what’s that got to do with Christmas?' Paddy said ' it’s Carols'.

Sha boom. Eh thenk yew.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What’s pink & covered in cob webs?

Madeline McCann’s bike...

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By *eith28Man  over a year ago

uxbridge

Lady walks into a bar. The barman asks what she’d like. She thinks, smiles and asks for a double entendre so he gave her one!

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By *moothdickMan  over a year ago

stoke

Kids loses his mum in Tesco’s, the security guard says “what’s yr mum like”!

Kid.. “gin & anal”

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By *rjimMan  over a year ago

nr bristol

I don't know if any of you are going skiing this Xmas...... ?

but then again...how would I.

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

I went to the dentist last week and it's not good news. She told me my teeth are alright but my gums have got to come out...

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By *ablo minibar123Woman  over a year ago

.

Did you hear about the lead singer of the group tight fit? ( Lion sleeps tonight). He got his leg bitten of by a shark. He couldn't whimaway quickly enough.

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By *eith28Man  over a year ago

uxbridge

two nuns in a bath -= one says to the other - where's the soap - the other replied...it does a bit doesn't it

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple  over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

A swinging woman goes to the dentist, he says open wide, her knees parted...

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By *MBER KENTCouple  over a year ago

folkestone

Snail walks into a bar about to order a drink the Barman picks it up n throws it out the door .. 4 weeks later same snail goes into the bar an says to barman what you do that for ..

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By *eith28Man  over a year ago

uxbridge

What did the slug say to the snail?

Big issue?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What goes click click "have I done it" click click "have I done it"

Stevie Wonder with a Rubiks cube

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