FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > The message problem on fab.
The message problem on fab.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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It's an tricky situation...
When a man sends messages, most of them get deleted without any reason given.
When a woman receives messages, I get the impression she gets overwhelming numbers of them. Far too many to deal with.
Is there a solution? Or are we all condemned to messaging damnation? |
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"It's an tricky situation...
When a man sends messages, most of them get deleted without any reason given.
When a woman receives messages, I get the impression she gets overwhelming numbers of them. Far too many to deal with.
Is there a solution? Or are we all condemned to messaging damnation?"
Do you send a picture of your face when sending messages? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's not always about volume.
It's often about the content.
This. I don't get huge amounts of messages but 99% are just full of crap. "
Unlike my awesome messages, obviously.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Tricky.. As we all want messages.. But sometimes we don't want the content... As alot of the time they are rude or abusive.. Getting better.. But 1 or 2 are spoiling it for the majority.
Never give up.
Fab is fab |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"It's not always about volume.
It's often about the content.
This. I don't get huge amounts of messages but 99% are just full of crap.
Unlike my awesome messages, obviously. "
Obviously, I respond to you lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not always about volume.
It's often about the content.
This. I don't get huge amounts of messages but 99% are just full of crap. "
There is only so many "hi what you up to" or "meet now" messages I feel inclined to reply to a day. |
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By *mberWoman
over a year ago
Preston |
It's when the same person send you exactly the same message a few weeks apart.
You didn't respond the first time because it was one line of laziness. I'm certainly not replying the second.
(That said I am tempted to tell him why...which would be replying!  ) |
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By *KCxWoman
over a year ago
skegness |
Coming up with something more than hi in a message, don't just send cock pictures, or a message titled can you help? No stories/fantasies about what your gonna do to me in a meet, there are tons more that just make our eyes roll as we hit delete  |
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"Only allow women / couples to contact single men. Everyone would be so much better off.
As crazy as this sounds this makes sense  "
Actually I've given this 2 minutes consideration and now changed my mind. No one would ever get messages |
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It is what it is and people need to understand exactly the points you raise, I have absolutely no hard feelings if I don’t get a reply I take it as they haven’t liked my profile or face picture and we aren’t going to have a connection. Couples and single ladies obviously get so much mail I can only imagine how boring it must be receiving some of rubbish I hear about and when people than send another message giving them a hard time about being refused or rejected it just confuses me what response they expect. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I posted this on one of the Ireland threads earlier. What about 5 messages a day to send to new users? If you get a reply then you can both chat away, or anyone you are already friends with or have previously spoken too you can still chat away. Only 5 messages a day though to send to people you havent contacted before. I think this would make more people read entire profiles so as they dont waste messages sending to those that are looking for something the sender isn't or vice versa. It would also cut out men spamming local women I think. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is no solution. If there were message filters or ways to hide profiles or take them off searches, life would be easier. But those things don't exist.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There is no solution. If there were message filters or ways to hide profiles or take them off searches, life would be easier. But those things don't exist. "
Do the filters work well? I just assumed people would get around them. All systems can be gamed. |
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A good start would be people actually reading profiles and not just looking at pictures and seeing if they actually have a similar mind set or anything in the profile strikes them as being something about themselves that doesn’t match what the profile is looking for since I removed my face and body pictures from my profile I find I get far less mail but the mail I do get is from people who have actually taken time to read about me !!!!
But that’s just my take on it  |
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"It's an tricky situation...
When a man sends messages, most of them get deleted without any reason given.
When a woman receives messages, I get the impression she gets overwhelming numbers of them. Far too many to deal with.
Is there a solution? Or are we all condemned to messaging damnation?"
She could always forward the ones she’s not prepared to read to you and you could reply on her behalf |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Solution is that women should send the messages instead.
Totally disagree
Why?
I send messages. "
I send messages too, I just don't think we should have to send all of them. I enjoy receiving messages from men if they aren't knobheads. |
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It's not a closed system where no one can influence the outcomes. And messages that get a zero result can be positive - it can mean that the recipient has assessed compatibility, deciding that the sender is not appropriate for them, they may be just physically unattractive to them, whatever their personality is etc.
If senders decide to provide insufficient or inappropriate material via the message or their profile, then they can only be viewed as self-limiting, for whatever their chosen reasons.
Likewise, recipients are in control of their actions, however they evaluate the senders.
Lots of choices and opportunities for everyone to work with the system as it stands and to influence their own outcomes.
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Keeley was just telling me privately that she's happy to read through all the messages from every man on fab. You heard it here 1st gents. So you can all message the lovely and generous Keeley. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only allow women / couples to contact single men. Everyone would be so much better off.
As crazy as this sounds this makes sense "
Yep. I've always advised women to do the same, including block all single guys first and message the ones they like the look of to lift the block on them? They'd get the odd rejection, but brush it off, it's no biggie. And they wouldn't have the piles of shite in their mailboxes that they detest so much either.
It's a solution that works, I didn't send a single initial message out to any woman (barring one to the lady who would become my OH as she was a very special exception) or couple for about a year and a half from my single males profile and I had a whale of a time throughout that period choosing meets from those that messaged me.
So it does work! 
B |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not a closed system where no one can influence the outcomes. And messages that get a zero result can be positive - it can mean that the recipient has assessed compatibility, deciding that the sender is not appropriate for them, they may be just physically unattractive to them, whatever their personality is etc.
If senders decide to provide insufficient or inappropriate material via the message or their profile, then they can only be viewed as self-limiting, for whatever their chosen reasons.
Likewise, recipients are in control of their actions, however they evaluate the senders.
Lots of choices and opportunities for everyone to work with the system as it stands and to influence their own outcomes.
"
Yep. This is pretty much what I was alluding to. Always going to be those that like to complain and blame everything/ everyone else though. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Keeley was just telling me privately that she's happy to read through all the messages from every man on fab. You heard it here 1st gents. So you can all message the lovely and generous Keeley. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hmmm are you saying I should alter my cut and paste message that says "fancy g3tting ur bakdurs smshed in luv?"
Next you'll be telling me to stop attaching 20 cock pics next to sky remotes! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Send better messages, very large majority if mine get a response."
How about this cunning interactive thing for my new message?
Hello (insert username here). I'm X inches long and Y inches thick. (Fill in measurements as desired.) If you don't care about cock size, ignore that last bit. I have attached a pic of my (pick face or a body part here.) I am into (pick an interest here.)
Happy shagging,
mrmanslut |
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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago
Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro |
It has nothing to do with volume.
For me it's more about have they read my profile. Do they have a cock avatar and have they made any effort within there profile or pictures. Can they put more than three words together or do they go straight into I'll fuck you into tomorrow etc..rolls eyes. Its just so boring. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's an tricky situation...
When a man sends messages, most of them get deleted without any reason given.
When a woman receives messages, I get the impression she gets overwhelming numbers of them. Far too many to deal with.
Is there a solution? Or are we all condemned to messaging damnation?"
yes, have a great profile, great pics and show some personality, always be polite and dont get crude with strangers  |
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By *asha86Couple
over a year ago
walsall |
We ask people to put the message heading as a certain word so we make sure they have read the profile and if your sending a dick pic of fancy a fuck message then im sorry its going to get deleted.
The main thing to point out is fab has an overwhelming amount of men on here compared to women/couples even we try to reply to everyone unless its the dick pics or fancy a fuck.... |
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"It has nothing to do with volume.
For me it's more about have they read my profile. Do they have a cock avatar and have they made any effort within there profile or pictures. Can they put more than three words together or do they go straight into I'll fuck you into tomorrow etc..rolls eyes. Its just so boring."
Totally agree about putting more effort into reading profiles like I stated in my comment I found now without having public face and body pictures I get far less messages but the ones I do get are for people who actually have taken the time to read my profile and I did actually make a effort in writing it after all isn’t that why we have profiles and not just images |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It has nothing to do with volume.
For me it's more about have they read my profile. Do they have a cock avatar and have they made any effort within there profile or pictures. Can they put more than three words together or do they go straight into I'll fuck you into tomorrow etc..rolls eyes. Its just so boring."
I’m not surprised. I’d fuck you into next week |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I enjoy receiving messages from men if they aren't knobheads.
You mean there are men on here who aren't "
I heard there was one, but it might be just a rumour.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's an tricky situation...
When a man sends messages, most of them get deleted without any reason given.
When a woman receives messages, I get the impression she gets overwhelming numbers of them. Far too many to deal with.
Is there a solution? Or are we all condemned to messaging damnation?"
Yep OP. Women not allow men to send the first message by filtering them out. Then only send messages to the fellas they want to talk to. Saves everyone's time! |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"It's an tricky situation...
When a man sends messages, most of them get deleted without any reason given.
When a woman receives messages, I get the impression she gets overwhelming numbers of them. Far too many to deal with.
Is there a solution? Or are we all condemned to messaging damnation?
Yep OP. Women not allow men to send the first message by filtering them out. Then only send messages to the fellas they want to talk to. Saves everyone's time! "
Then 90% of the men wouldn't get any messages and bitch about it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I enjoy receiving messages from men if they aren't knobheads.
You mean there are men on here who aren't
I heard there was one, but it might be just a rumour. "
He left.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I enjoy receiving messages from men if they aren't knobheads.
You mean there are men on here who aren't
I heard there was one, but it might be just a rumour.
He left. "
Noooooo! |
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"I enjoy receiving messages from men if they aren't knobheads.
You mean there are men on here who aren't
I heard there was one, but it might be just a rumour.
He left. "
Oh well, may as well call it a day then. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I enjoy receiving messages from men if they aren't knobheads.
You mean there are men on here who aren't
I heard there was one, but it might be just a rumour.
He left.
Oh well, may as well call it a day then. "
|
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By *eesideMan
over a year ago
margate sumwear by the sea |
Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins. |
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By *lan157Man
over a year ago
a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex |
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins. "
Except the site would make no money and close as many men would not pay if they can't send fatuous messages with cock pictures. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
Except the site would make no money and close as many men would not pay if they can't send fatuous messages with cock pictures. "
Just like in clubs, women are fuck bait. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins. "
As I've said before, 90% of men wouldn't get any messages then bitch about that. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
As I've said before, 90% of men wouldn't get any messages then bitch about that. "
As long as I still got messages from you, I'd be happy. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
As I've said before, 90% of men wouldn't get any messages then bitch about that.
As long as I still got messages from you, I'd be happy. "
Charmer! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
As I've said before, 90% of men wouldn't get any messages then bitch about that.
As long as I still got messages from you, I'd be happy.
Charmer!"
And I hear you're quite the snake charmer. Only it's not snakes you charm...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
Except the site would make no money and close as many men would not pay if they can't send fatuous messages with cock pictures.
Just like in clubs, women are fuck bait. "
really omg  |
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"It's an tricky situation...
When a man sends messages, most of them get deleted without any reason given.
When a woman receives messages, I get the impression she gets overwhelming numbers of them. Far too many to deal with.
Is there a solution? Or are we all condemned to messaging damnation?
Do you send a picture of your face when sending messages? "
Yes. That's probably why the message gets deleted, in all fairness.... |
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By *ady23Woman
over a year ago
Coventry |
"It's an tricky situation...
When a man sends messages, most of them get deleted without any reason given.
When a woman receives messages, I get the impression she gets overwhelming numbers of them. Far too many to deal with.
Is there a solution? Or are we all condemned to messaging damnation?"
Is about quality not quantity |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
As I've said before, 90% of men wouldn't get any messages then bitch about that.
As long as I still got messages from you, I'd be happy.
Charmer!
And I hear you're quite the snake charmer. Only it's not snakes you charm... "
I do try  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
As I've said before, 90% of men wouldn't get any messages then bitch about that.
As long as I still got messages from you, I'd be happy.
Charmer!
And I hear you're quite the snake charmer. Only it's not snakes you charm...
I do try "
You and your magical mouth, I hear. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I posted this on one of the Ireland threads earlier. What about 5 messages a day to send to new users? If you get a reply then you can both chat away, or anyone you are already friends with or have previously spoken too you can still chat away. Only 5 messages a day though to send to people you havent contacted before. I think this would make more people read entire profiles so as they dont waste messages sending to those that are looking for something the sender isn't or vice versa. It would also cut out men spamming local women I think."
that's defiantly a good idea, I wouldn't send 5 new messages a month let alone a day |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
I feel lots of people are missing the point of this thread. Is wasn't a "woe is me!" single man thread.
I was curious on people's views about the difficulty men face being noticed among so many messages. And on the difficulty women face in finding messages they're interested in among countless ones they don't want. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
As I've said before, 90% of men wouldn't get any messages then bitch about that.
As long as I still got messages from you, I'd be happy.
Charmer!
And I hear you're quite the snake charmer. Only it's not snakes you charm...
I do try
You and your magical mouth, I hear. "
I have had many compliments |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I feel lots of people are missing the point of this thread. Is wasn't a "woe is me!" single man thread.
I was curious on people's views about the difficulty men face being noticed among so many messages. And on the difficulty women face in finding messages they're interested in among countless ones they don't want."
Yep I get it. I still think those problems are self inflicted. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I feel lots of people are missing the point of this thread. Is wasn't a "woe is me!" single man thread.
I was curious on people's views about the difficulty men face being noticed among so many messages. And on the difficulty women face in finding messages they're interested in among countless ones they don't want.
Yep I get it. I still think those problems are self inflicted. "
Some can be, I have quite a strict age range but I still get loads of crap messages from that age range |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Im not so keen on the women ony being able to message first. Heaven forbid what if a man wanted to ask something non meeting related, like whats the weather down in Devon when he was up in Scotland or something? Silencing of the Men.
If you're going to get noticed you will if you're not your not. And no one has to have a million messages in their inbox. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
As I've said before, 90% of men wouldn't get any messages then bitch about that.
As long as I still got messages from you, I'd be happy.
Charmer!
And I hear you're quite the snake charmer. Only it's not snakes you charm...
I do try
You and your magical mouth, I hear.
I have had many compliments "
so have i |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's an tricky situation...
When a man sends messages, most of them get deleted without any reason given.
When a woman receives messages, I get the impression she gets overwhelming numbers of them. Far too many to deal with.
Is there a solution? Or are we all condemned to messaging damnation?"
the fearfulness of rejection post again
good luck OP |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's an tricky situation...
When a man sends messages, most of them get deleted without any reason given.
When a woman receives messages, I get the impression she gets overwhelming numbers of them. Far too many to deal with.
Is there a solution? Or are we all condemned to messaging damnation?"
some of the messages are distasteful
and rude and yes will get rejected
I do not get so many
am I bothered or lose sleep no
quality over quantity always |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
As I've said before, 90% of men wouldn't get any messages then bitch about that.
As long as I still got messages from you, I'd be happy.
Charmer!
And I hear you're quite the snake charmer. Only it's not snakes you charm...
I do try
You and your magical mouth, I hear.
I have had many compliments so have i "
Haha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There is no solution. If there were message filters or ways to hide profiles or take them off searches, life would be easier. But those things don't exist.
Do the filters work well? I just assumed people would get around them. All systems can be gamed."
That would be pointless, crack a filter to send an unwanted message which will simply be deleted. |
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By *eesideMan
over a year ago
margate sumwear by the sea |
"Make a new Fab rule so men can't message to any woman till a woman messages them. Then thay can message.
But only the woman that had messaged them.
Get the women to do the hunting..
Problem,s solved.
Men can't complain about the messages being deleted.
And
Woman can't complain about having 50 million messages a day.
Everybody wins.
As I've said before, 90% of men wouldn't get any messages then bitch about that. "
90% if men don't get messages anyway so what's the difference ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only allow women / couples to contact single men. Everyone would be so much better off.
As crazy as this sounds this makes sense "
I wonder what would happen if Fab took this approach |
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I think the issue is the amount of guys on here in the first place.
The ratio I heard is 30:1!
So if any of the theories put forward were. True that's alot of guys hanging around waiting on that "hi" Message from a female or couple. How long before they lose interest and gold and silver accounts expire or are closed. Fab would collapse in a month |
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