FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Are you more submissive, dominant or a switch!
Are you more submissive, dominant or a switch!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Come on then spill your kinks  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am sexually assertive |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am sexually assertive "
Your bootyhole says otherwise! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can be whatever you want me to be  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am sexually assertive "
This  . Although totally depends who it is. I’ve found myself changing a bit lately which has surprised me a little. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a sensualist. |
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By *adeiteWoman
over a year ago
Staffordshire |
Dominant but lately I've been wondering about being a sub |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am none of those |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dominant with Switch tendencies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Strictly Sub with males
Switch with tvs and females |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m just me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Me  |
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I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it. |
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By *adetMan
over a year ago
South of Ipswich |
More sub with guys. I like him to be dom and assertive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm better than all of you, at everything, unless you want a go at being best.....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Submissive through and through. I wish I could switch |
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Switch! Although I’m certainly no sub!!  |
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100% sub but only for those who know how to communicate with me. |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
I like to make sure the lady gets more enjoyment than me.
Does that make me a bit submissive? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like to make sure the lady gets more enjoyment than me.
Does that make me a bit submissive? "
I think it makes you attentive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like to make sure the lady gets more enjoyment than me.
Does that make me a bit submissive? "
I think it’s more the other way round. I’m like that and I’m definitely not submissive. |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
Always thought myself as a bit in the middle. |
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More dominant but that tends to stay in the bedroom, go with the flow any other time. |
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Switch, but generally more assertive (it depends who I'm with) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Much more Dominant, I have played submissively before but that is a very very rare occurrence. |
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Mainly submissive... but for the right guy  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mainly submissive... but for the right guy "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think I prefer, sexually aggressive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I usually say Switch, on reflection I think I'm more naturally Dominant who is happy to switch occasionally, but on my terms only |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Switch... but more Domme
(Miss)
Switch... but more sub
(Mr) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Very submissive but like to switch from time to time |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
I’m not submissive. I’m not dominant either. Just bossy. I like the struggle. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Submissive, x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I usually say Switch, on reflection I think I'm more a naturally Dominant adonis who is happy to switch occasionally, but on my terms only "
Fixed that for you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not everyone fits into a category, and it's certainly not restricted to those 3 "labels" OP |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I usually say Switch, on reflection I think I'm more a naturally Dominant adonis who is happy to switch occasionally, but on my terms only
Fixed that for you "
Ummm.. I'd definitely NOT use that word to describe myself Errr.. thanks, I guess. |
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Mainly submissive, however I have switched on occasion and enjoyed the dominance |
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Sub/brat. Reluctant switch when I’m frustrated or bored. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I usually say Switch, on reflection I think I'm more a naturally Dominant adonis who is happy to switch occasionally, but on my terms only
Fixed that for you
Ummm.. I'd definitely NOT use that word to describe myself Errr.. thanks, I guess."
And so you shouldnt, that would be egotistical |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it."
I'm switchy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it."
You'll probably have a few offers now
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By *gcw2014Couple
over a year ago
just outside of liverpool |
Chris is mainly sub especially to women. He will switch though. All depends on the situation and who we are with as not many females will be domme. Tracey doesnt lean towards either and again depends on the situation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am a switch but Holly says i lean more towards the sub role
I think it’s a change from the norm that I enjoy handing control over
Holly also has a very good theory that the sub is the one with the power and i have to agree with her on this
LJ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am a switch but Holly says i lean more towards the sub role
I think it’s a change from the norm that I enjoy handing control over
Holly also has a very good theory that the sub is the one with the power and i have to agree with her on this
LJ"
Where were those lush lips last night on the lips thread?! Hope you’re both well you pair of
Lovelies x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am a switch but Holly says i lean more towards the sub role
I think it’s a change from the norm that I enjoy handing control over
Holly also has a very good theory that the sub is the one with the power and i have to agree with her on this
LJ
Where were those lush lips last night on the lips thread?! Hope you’re both well you pair of
Lovelies x"
Profile pic changed in honour of your compliment we both thought it was really nice of you to say Holly/Mystique has luscious lips and unsurprisingly i agree with you
We are both well thanks for asking Nora and we hope all is good in Nora’s world
LJ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Neither. I'm sexually confident. This means if someone else is enjoying taking the lead I'm happy to go with the flow,if they seem unsure then I will step up. It's the same in all aspects of my life. Maybe I'm just sexually lazy lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a switch |
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"I usually say Switch, on reflection I think I'm more naturally Dominant who is happy to switch occasionally, but on my terms only "
You're just stubborn but some of us like a challenge |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Submissive |
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
I'm switchy "
Would this be a you scratch my itch I'll scratch yours situation? |
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
"
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem  . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem ."
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't label myself as anything.
Just go with the flow..... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
I'm switchy
Would this be a you scratch my itch I'll scratch yours situation? "
If you bring rope, anything can happen  |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I guess I'm a switch as it depends on who I am with. Usually I just go with the flow and see where that takes me. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I was very submissive for some time a few years ago. Now I tend to shun those labels and just go with the dynamic and what feels right with the person at the time and focus more on the pleasure than the actual act.
So I guess... switch? |
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?"
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m for sure a switch and really just depends on the dynamic my partner and I have at the time. I’m all about the moment so I don’t really go into a meet knowing which side of me will come out more. |
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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting."
This is so true! |
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I’m neither. I go with the flow of the person I’m with and where it leads us |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting."
That sound to me like they are just selfish people, i have a list quite a long list of things i would like but i wouldn't dream of demanding or expecting anything, playtime should just evolve naturally and to my mind the dominant should be taking the lead with how they feel and its up to me to signal if im enjoying it or not, for me a big part of being sub is the anticipation of wether im going to get to experience xyz or not. |
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
I'm switchy
Would this be a you scratch my itch I'll scratch yours situation?
If you bring rope, anything can happen "
If I'm tying you I insist in the prettiest, girliest colours... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Moi?!.. a switch in the right hands! |
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting.
That sound to me like they are just selfish people, i have a list quite a long list of things i would like but i wouldn't dream of demanding or expecting anything, playtime should just evolve naturally and to my mind the dominant should be taking the lead with how they feel and its up to me to signal if im enjoying it or not, for me a big part of being sub is the anticipation of wether im going to get to experience xyz or not."
Unfortunately a lot of submissive men are very entitled and see Dominant women as fantasy dispensers instead of people. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
I'm switchy
Would this be a you scratch my itch I'll scratch yours situation?
If you bring rope, anything can happen
If I'm tying you I insist in the prettiest, girliest colours..."
Works for me, hopefully I'll learn something along the way and can repay the kindness |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting.
That sound to me like they are just selfish people, i have a list quite a long list of things i would like but i wouldn't dream of demanding or expecting anything, playtime should just evolve naturally and to my mind the dominant should be taking the lead with how they feel and its up to me to signal if im enjoying it or not, for me a big part of being sub is the anticipation of wether im going to get to experience xyz or not.
Unfortunately a lot of submissive men are very entitled and see Dominant women as fantasy dispensers instead of people."
Arguably i think that could just be a lot of men in general going by my experiences and reading many ladies and couples profiles |
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
I'm switchy
Would this be a you scratch my itch I'll scratch yours situation?
If you bring rope, anything can happen
If I'm tying you I insist in the prettiest, girliest colours...
Works for me, hopefully I'll learn something along the way and can repay the kindness "
Damn you're hard to be mean to, lovely boy |
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By *gcw2014Couple
over a year ago
just outside of liverpool |
"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting.
That sound to me like they are just selfish people, i have a list quite a long list of things i would like but i wouldn't dream of demanding or expecting anything, playtime should just evolve naturally and to my mind the dominant should be taking the lead with how they feel and its up to me to signal if im enjoying it or not, for me a big part of being sub is the anticipation of wether im going to get to experience xyz or not.
Unfortunately a lot of submissive men are very entitled and see Dominant women as fantasy dispensers instead of people."
when I'm in sub mode my aim is to please the person in charge which means obeying on their terms and not demanding my own. As long as limits are respected I'm under the dommes control when it happens
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Male sub and fem switch here |
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By *iss.RedWoman
over a year ago
somewhere |
If I had to describe myself it would be a switch. I like to turn the tables and take control every so often |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sub... as I hold the controls |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dominant caveman |
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting.
That sound to me like they are just selfish people, i have a list quite a long list of things i would like but i wouldn't dream of demanding or expecting anything, playtime should just evolve naturally and to my mind the dominant should be taking the lead with how they feel and its up to me to signal if im enjoying it or not, for me a big part of being sub is the anticipation of wether im going to get to experience xyz or not.
Unfortunately a lot of submissive men are very entitled and see Dominant women as fantasy dispensers instead of people.
Arguably i think that could just be a lot of men in general going by my experiences and reading many ladies and couples profiles"
Possibly some truth to that. I think I just find it extra annoying that they believe they're being submissive despite their demands.
A lot also seem to think submitting means "woo I get to lie here and have all the things done to me". Fuck that, if I'm in charge and I want a break they're doing the work. Plus half the fun is making them work for what they want . Though submissive womem can also be guilty of this attitude. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Bratty sub, I do enjoy a bit of a battle but it's handing control completely that gets me off.
Peach x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting.
That sound to me like they are just selfish people, i have a list quite a long list of things i would like but i wouldn't dream of demanding or expecting anything, playtime should just evolve naturally and to my mind the dominant should be taking the lead with how they feel and its up to me to signal if im enjoying it or not, for me a big part of being sub is the anticipation of wether im going to get to experience xyz or not.
Unfortunately a lot of submissive men are very entitled and see Dominant women as fantasy dispensers instead of people.
Arguably i think that could just be a lot of men in general going by my experiences and reading many ladies and couples profiles
Possibly some truth to that. I think I just find it extra annoying that they believe they're being submissive despite their demands.
A lot also seem to think submitting means "woo I get to lie here and have all the things done to me". Fuck that, if I'm in charge and I want a break they're doing the work. Plus half the fun is making them work for what they want . Though submissive womem can also be guilty of this attitude."
Thats just a silly attitude to take, you get out what you put in, if you make the effort to satisfy then you'll be rewarded in turn (in theory) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
I'm switchy
Would this be a you scratch my itch I'll scratch yours situation?
If you bring rope, anything can happen
If I'm tying you I insist in the prettiest, girliest colours...
Works for me, hopefully I'll learn something along the way and can repay the kindness
Damn you're hard to be mean to, lovely boy "
Oh you can be a little mean, if not I'll twist your nipples to anger you a little |
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By *gcw2014Couple
over a year ago
just outside of liverpool |
"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting.
That sound to me like they are just selfish people, i have a list quite a long list of things i would like but i wouldn't dream of demanding or expecting anything, playtime should just evolve naturally and to my mind the dominant should be taking the lead with how they feel and its up to me to signal if im enjoying it or not, for me a big part of being sub is the anticipation of wether im going to get to experience xyz or not.
Unfortunately a lot of submissive men are very entitled and see Dominant women as fantasy dispensers instead of people.
Arguably i think that could just be a lot of men in general going by my experiences and reading many ladies and couples profiles
Possibly some truth to that. I think I just find it extra annoying that they believe they're being submissive despite their demands.
A lot also seem to think submitting means "woo I get to lie here and have all the things done to me". Fuck that, if I'm in charge and I want a break they're doing the work. Plus half the fun is making them work for what they want . Though submissive womem can also be guilty of this attitude."
it should be a 2 way thing. A domme should be able to get what she wants from the sub after all they are in charge but at the same time the sub should hopefully get something out of it without being selfish and should remember that they are there to please their domme and should get pleasure from that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting.
That sound to me like they are just selfish people, i have a list quite a long list of things i would like but i wouldn't dream of demanding or expecting anything, playtime should just evolve naturally and to my mind the dominant should be taking the lead with how they feel and its up to me to signal if im enjoying it or not, for me a big part of being sub is the anticipation of wether im going to get to experience xyz or not.
Unfortunately a lot of submissive men are very entitled and see Dominant women as fantasy dispensers instead of people.
Arguably i think that could just be a lot of men in general going by my experiences and reading many ladies and couples profiles
Possibly some truth to that. I think I just find it extra annoying that they believe they're being submissive despite their demands.
A lot also seem to think submitting means "woo I get to lie here and have all the things done to me". Fuck that, if I'm in charge and I want a break they're doing the work. Plus half the fun is making them work for what they want . Though submissive womem can also be guilty of this attitude.it should be a 2 way thing. A domme should be able to get what she wants from the sub after all they are in charge but at the same time the sub should hopefully get something out of it without being selfish and should remember that they are there to please their domme and should get pleasure from that"
That last bit is spot on, to me the main part of being sub is that i take geat pleasure in knowing that i am or have pleased my dom/domme its somewhat satisfying. Even in a vanilla situation ive been with men who have cum and then asked if i want finishing off and they get confused when i tell them that im satified enough without the need to ejaculate |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As long as i get to control when she cums and how many then call me what u want |
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By *gcw2014Couple
over a year ago
just outside of liverpool |
Being able to climax is not a necessity for myself. A thrill for me is not knowing what to expect as every situation can be different. I guess it's the fear and anticipation
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m neither. I go with the flow of the person I’m with and where it leads us"
Yes - we’ll put. I hate having to label one or the other but defo feel obligated to do so these days. |
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By *eilde HoarWoman
over a year ago
In a wax coated bubble |
I am sexually confident and I seek sexually confident men |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
In a D/s or actually bisexual context I'm very much sub/bottom and naturally so - have tried switching in the past but just isn't something I am comfortable with.
I'd add as a rider to that that I need to "feel" submissive to someone to submit to them, which is a rare thing for me.
Take D/s out of the equation and I'm very much equal and go with the flow including any kind of kink play |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting."
I think the nature of sites like this means that the 'sexual requirements' are often bought to the fore before the old fashioned 'getting to know some' part of human interaction.
Also, and I caveat this with, iny limited experience male subs bring a lists of wants and needs while female subs come with a shorter list of what is off limits and also what they enjoy. The latter seems to allow a more natural flow of 'play' and without pressure to provide to a shopping list.
That's just my observation |
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By *elnkazCouple
over a year ago
cheshire |
I loved being the submissive one but since getting with Del I love to be dominant with him. In the bedroom of course ,or club. We both like to switch to give each other pleasure ..k |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Submissive. Always. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like to switch but mostly sub |
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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago
The Land that time forgot (Norfolk) |
"If I had to describe myself it would be a switch. I like to turn the tables and take control every so often"
I concur, while I'm normally dominant I do enjoy you slapping me round the face with your strap on occasionally. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If I had to describe myself it would be a switch. I like to turn the tables and take control every so often
I concur, while I'm normally dominant I do enjoy you slapping me round the face with your strap on occasionally."
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"In a D/s or actually bisexual context I'm very much sub/bottom and naturally so - have tried switching in the past but just isn't something I am comfortable with.
I'd add as a rider to that that I need to "feel" submissive to someone to submit to them, which is a rare thing for me.
"
Absolutely agree with this
I can be a bit flirty and playful in a meet,so to get me to play or be submissive takes some skill and knowledge of how to manipulate the natural nervousness of a new partner and the changing of the dynamic between us both.
I don't submit to anyone I believe can't handle my personality when dressed. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Right off the middle line towards the dominant side, but not terribly kinky. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm very submissive! I love a dominant man |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm very submissive! I love a dominant man "
Your new pic  |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"In a D/s or actually bisexual context I'm very much sub/bottom and naturally so - have tried switching in the past but just isn't something I am comfortable with.
I'd add as a rider to that that I need to "feel" submissive to someone to submit to them, which is a rare thing for me.
Absolutely agree with this
I can be a bit flirty and playful in a meet,so to get me to play or be submissive takes some skill and knowledge of how to manipulate the natural nervousness of a new partner and the changing of the dynamic between us both.
I don't submit to anyone I believe can't handle my personality when dressed. "
I think in most cases here it will be a case of knowing each other quite well first of all before taking it to d/s roles |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting.
I think the nature of sites like this means that the 'sexual requirements' are often bought to the fore before the old fashioned 'getting to know some' part of human interaction.
Also, and I caveat this with, iny limited experience male subs bring a lists of wants and needs while female subs come with a shorter list of what is off limits and also what they enjoy. The latter seems to allow a more natural flow of 'play' and without pressure to provide to a shopping list.
That's just my observation "
To an extent I think you're right - *some* male submissives see it as a sexual act (usually informed by porn they have watched or misconceived ideas) as opposed to something more cerebral and as such have a list of wants and needs they expect to be fulfilled almost as a tick box - for me my submission goes a lot deeper than that and whilst I think discussing wants and needs, as well as likes/dislikes and limits beforehand is important that is all it *should* be - a discussion. Once submission is given and control passed over it becomes the dominants role to decide what does/doesn't happen - otherwise it becomes topping from the bottom and to my way of thinking at least, kind of defeats the object.
That all said, if all concerned are happy with how they play that is up to them entirely - there is no right way to D/s, only the way agreed between two (or more) consenting adults. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm very submissive! I love a dominant man
Your new pic "
fanks |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm very submissive! I love a dominant man
Your new pic
fanks "
I like all your pics |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Scooby is Dom and Luna is Sub and dont switch. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm very submissive! I love a dominant man
Your new pic
fanks
I like all your pics "
Thank you! You guys are making me blush now! |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"I'm very submissive! I love a dominant man
Your new pic
fanks
I like all your pics
Thank you! You guys are making me blush now! "
Cant blame them. You are gorgeous. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I'm very submissive! I love a dominant man
Your new pic
fanks
I like all your pics
Thank you! You guys are making me blush now! "
I like your pics, personality, body head to toe and even your quirk for examining male anuses |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Right guys stop it or I'm going to kill you three with a banana!! I'm dying here |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"
Right guys stop it or I'm going to kill you three with a banana!! I'm dying here "
What a way to go. Pwaoh. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am submissive and do really like dominant men. Oh yes!! |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
This is just not a paradigm we relate to at all. Neither of us has any desire to dominate or submit to anybody. We just want all parties to have as much pleasure as possible as equals. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Right guys stop it or I'm going to kill you three with a banana!! I'm dying here "
Please ....no....not the banana.....I submit.....no I can't I'm not not switch....ahhhhhhh.....that's really messing with my melon man  |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"This is just not a paradigm we relate to at all. Neither of us has any desire to dominate or submit to anybody. We just want all parties to have as much pleasure as possible as equals."
Most that are into the D/s lifestyle would consider themselves equals to one another to be honest - just different sides of the same coin - by giving their submission, a submissive does so of their own free will and from a place of equality to the dominant who accepts it |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Put me or some people I know in the right situation and anything can happen, people who have a wish list that are not their usual are usually not going to make it |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
I used to identify as a sub.. very sub... now im always in control. But.... sometimes people seem to tease the submissive brat in me .. but she isn't allowed out to play |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a switch, but definitely more Domme, however would like to explore being more submissive with the right person |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Switch though I'm way to fiery to be totally sub,I love the whole control feeling |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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switch depends on the mood |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Silverback alpha male |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is just not a paradigm we relate to at all. Neither of us has any desire to dominate or submit to anybody. We just want all parties to have as much pleasure as possible as equals.
Most that are into the D/s lifestyle would consider themselves equals to one another to be honest - just different sides of the same coin - by giving their submission, a submissive does so of their own free will and from a place of equality to the dominant who accepts it "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well Mr Morningstar I am submissive in the bedroom, a bit more assertive out of it |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is just not a paradigm we relate to at all. Neither of us has any desire to dominate or submit to anybody. We just want all parties to have as much pleasure as possible as equals."
I agree. But being a little dominant doesn’t necessarily mean the other person submitting etc. I see it as one person taking control at the time. I’m not at all into the proper BDSM side of it, not that kind of dominant. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well Mr Morningstar I am submissive in the bedroom, a bit more assertive out of it "
Haha, care to elaborate on the latter |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Silverback alpha male"
Did you know they have the smallest testicles in relation to body size? |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Silverback alpha male"
Swoon!! |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting.
That sound to me like they are just selfish people, i have a list quite a long list of things i would like but i wouldn't dream of demanding or expecting anything, playtime should just evolve naturally and to my mind the dominant should be taking the lead with how they feel and its up to me to signal if im enjoying it or not, for me a big part of being sub is the anticipation of wether im going to get to experience xyz or not.
Unfortunately a lot of submissive men are very entitled and see Dominant women as fantasy dispensers instead of people.
Arguably i think that could just be a lot of men in general going by my experiences and reading many ladies and couples profiles
Possibly some truth to that. I think I just find it extra annoying that they believe they're being submissive despite their demands.
A lot also seem to think submitting means "woo I get to lie here and have all the things done to me". Fuck that, if I'm in charge and I want a break they're doing the work. Plus half the fun is making them work for what they want . Though submissive womem can also be guilty of this attitude.it should be a 2 way thing. A domme should be able to get what she wants from the sub after all they are in charge but at the same time the sub should hopefully get something out of it without being selfish and should remember that they are there to please their domme and should get pleasure from that"
Absolutely it should be a two way thing but unfortunately with some submissive men it's all about them. |
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By *eilde HoarWoman
over a year ago
In a wax coated bubble |
"Silverback alpha male
Did you know they have the smallest testicles in relation to body size?"
Shhhhhhh he might put up the ball sack pic again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Very much a dom here. Complete darling outside of the bedroom though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t think I’m any 
Although I do like when a man takes control but I’m not into being called names etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Quite recently a number of people have saiid i would make a good dom...can't see it myself..perhaps it's the look i give people that are full of crap... |
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By *abrina59TV/TS
over a year ago
moved to cuckold land |
Im def submissive
a previous Mistress showed me that whether as Sabrina or not |
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By *ady23Woman
over a year ago
Coventry |
I'd be the domibant and the nistress |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Switchy as hell. I can't decide what I like best, being a bratty Sub, or a (sexually) torturing Dom.
However, I definitely don't like much pain in either roll. I especially hate causing it, if I sting a bum cheek too much I feel the need to kiss it better! |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
Both assertive, however L does switch with a positive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I have to label myself I would say "switch"...I enjoy the dynamic of being in control of a woman, and having the control taken from me as well.
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By *ady23Woman
over a year ago
Coventry |
Sorry guys. Damn text. I meant I love to feel in control and desired so I am the mistress dominating my sub or subs |
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A natural sub, all day long! I like to work hard to give pleasure and don't always need anything in return.
That said, I'll be much more assertive until I know someone better. Even with someone I know well I'm rarely passive when it comes to sex.
Outside of the bedroom, not at all submissive
Mrs TMN x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Can sub with a lovely lady. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sorry guys. Damn text. I meant I love to feel in control and desired so I am the mistress dominating my sub or subs "
You can dominate me any time! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Come on then spill your kinks "
Can be a switch...but more enjoyable to play a sub... |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Sub slave here.
The thought of submitting to a switch is very enticing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Whatever you need.
... Deviant chameleon.. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Mostly dominant with a sprinkling of switch probably |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Top/Rigger dom within certain dynamics when theres a good connection and both parties want it |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Submissive |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
I'm Sub only to my Dom.
I'm a Domme in my own right.
I'm NOT a switch. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Definitely Dominant, it's a rare bed partner that could induce me to switch. |
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"I'm a switch. I used to be mostly submissive but over the past 6 months or so I've had incredibly strong dominant urges which has been incredibly frustrating as I've only had dominant partners and therefore no outlet for it.
You'll probably have a few offers now
Probably. Unfortunately I find most submissive men really annoying! That's probably my problem .
Out of curiosity what is it that you find annoying? If you dont mind my asking?
They're often very demanding. They rock up with a list of wants with very little thought given to what pleases me. It's useful to me to know what they like and dislike but the administering of each will be on my terms, not theirs and that's what a lot of them don't get. Of course they set their boundaries and I will always respect them but if they want to dictate how play is going to happen then I'm not interested and despite what they may think they are not submitting.
That sound to me like they are just selfish people, i have a list quite a long list of things i would like but i wouldn't dream of demanding or expecting anything, playtime should just evolve naturally and to my mind the dominant should be taking the lead with how they feel and its up to me to signal if im enjoying it or not, for me a big part of being sub is the anticipation of wether im going to get to experience xyz or not.
Unfortunately a lot of submissive men are very entitled and see Dominant women as fantasy dispensers instead of people.
Arguably i think that could just be a lot of men in general going by my experiences and reading many ladies and couples profiles
Possibly some truth to that. I think I just find it extra annoying that they believe they're being submissive despite their demands.
A lot also seem to think submitting means "woo I get to lie here and have all the things done to me". Fuck that, if I'm in charge and I want a break they're doing the work. Plus half the fun is making them work for what they want . Though submissive womem can also be guilty of this attitude.it should be a 2 way thing. A domme should be able to get what she wants from the sub after all they are in charge but at the same time the sub should hopefully get something out of it without being selfish and should remember that they are there to please their domme and should get pleasure from that
Absolutely it should be a two way thing but unfortunately with some submissive men it's all about them."
Tell me about it. 
Sometimes a little re-education is needed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Erring to dominant, but would like whoever I was with to be a bit feisty and test my resolve... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This is just not a paradigm we relate to at all. Neither of us has any desire to dominate or submit to anybody. We just want all parties to have as much pleasure as possible as equals.
I agree. But being a little dominant doesn’t necessarily mean the other person submitting etc. I see it as one person taking control at the time. I’m not at all into the proper BDSM side of it, not that kind of dominant. "
Curious on your thoughts of what BDSM side of dominant is? Its not about pain although can be a little depending on limits.
I am (Scooby) and Dom and Luna is sub we dont switch. Although Luna does do some dominant actions when asked to. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
I find it interesting as to how many people identify on this aspect even if its not specifically in a D/s dynamic.
In general terms I don't play that way and can get frustrated if someone expects me to be dominant all the time.
I find that power dynamics can be incredibly intricate things and very addictive with the right person.
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I like to describe myself as unlabeled |
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I’m probs more switch, but hate the label xx |
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
As usual I agree with Geminiman.
I would like to examine more closely three themes in the thread.
The first where people say "I am this but..." . I would like to thank the Proud to be Kinky Podcast for helping me with this point.
I think despite what role we say we take, we are all individuals and do not necessarily fit entirely in one definition. There are people who seem to enforce compliance with a role or "you are not a proper [insert role]" which is bollocks. Life is messy people are messy. If a female submissive likes to peg men, it does not means she can't identify as a submissive. How a person identifies themselves is their own business. Kink is an alternative lifestyle, people should be free to be quirky within the lifestyle.
The second point is the pain thing. On the other site I identify as a sensual sadist. I have attended workshops and studied it. But it is about only playing with the right people, playing consensually and understanding the limits.
But there is more to D/S than pain. Individuals have their own desires Be it from service to humiliation to just having the feeling of being owned. There is no one way to do D/S, there is only personal D/S. So even casual D/S can be as intense as D/S in a long standing relationship.
My final point is on who controls the relationship. My position has always been it is joint control as it is a case of serving both parties needs.
However, (and would add everyone has their own definition of submission) I am tending to view as mentioned by Geminiman the submissive gives over control to the dom/me. In doing so the sub is not surrendering the right to be treated with respect, nor surrendering their basic humanity, nor the right to say no and walk away. It is a granting of control within defined limits. But everyone obviously is entitled to their own definition.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is just not a paradigm we relate to at all. Neither of us has any desire to dominate or submit to anybody. We just want all parties to have as much pleasure as possible as equals.
I agree. But being a little dominant doesn’t necessarily mean the other person submitting etc. I see it as one person taking control at the time. I’m not at all into the proper BDSM side of it, not that kind of dominant.
Curious on your thoughts of what BDSM side of dominant is? Its not about pain although can be a little depending on limits.
I am (Scooby) and Dom and Luna is sub we dont switch. Although Luna does do some dominant actions when asked to."
I’ll be honest and say I don’t have a clue and have no interest in BDSM whatsoever. I may have worded it wrong but I was making a point that being dominant doesn’t have to be linked to that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Love to be sub.. sniff weakness and the little bitch is getting it
So id say switch
Mrs K |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m most definitely sub. Works out well as hubby is oh so dominant |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can go either way with men, but I'll never sub to another woman |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can go either way with men, but I'll never sub to another woman "
See I can with women. Never have with men although that has changed a bit recently but in general I don’t. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can go either way with men, but I'll never sub to another woman
See I can with women. Never have with men although that has changed a bit recently but in general I don’t. "
Sub for me anytime you like |
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More switch, depends on who I'm with and where we are x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Usually a submissive brat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As usual I agree with Geminiman.
I would like to examine more closely three themes in the thread.
The first where people say "I am this but..." . I would like to thank the Proud to be Kinky Podcast for helping me with this point.
I think despite what role we say we take, we are all individuals and do not necessarily fit entirely in one definition. There are people who seem to enforce compliance with a role or "you are not a proper [insert role]" which is bollocks. Life is messy people are messy. If a female submissive likes to peg men, it does not means she can't identify as a submissive. How a person identifies themselves is their own business. Kink is an alternative lifestyle, people should be free to be quirky within the lifestyle.
The second point is the pain thing. On the other site I identify as a sensual sadist. I have attended workshops and studied it. But it is about only playing with the right people, playing consensually and understanding the limits.
But there is more to D/S than pain. Individuals have their own desires Be it from service to humiliation to just having the feeling of being owned. There is no one way to do D/S, there is only personal D/S. So even casual D/S can be as intense as D/S in a long standing relationship.
My final point is on who controls the relationship. My position has always been it is joint control as it is a case of serving both parties needs.
However, (and would add everyone has their own definition of submission) I am tending to view as mentioned by Geminiman the submissive gives over control to the dom/me. In doing so the sub is not surrendering the right to be treated with respect, nor surrendering their basic humanity, nor the right to say no and walk away. It is a granting of control within defined limits. But everyone obviously is entitled to their own definition.
"
Spot on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m a bit of both x |
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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago
Whitley Bay |
I'm explorative, playful, experimental kinky, vanilla, spontaneous, loving. I could lock up his cock and the other can have me any way he wants .. maybe tomorrow I'll fall in love and be monogomous again ( tho I doubt it!).
I like my play to be in line with where my mind and body are taking me .. and in response to my partners and our unique connection.
All of it please.
I want all aspects of myself to show up, each take her turn to guide me through this awesome privilege I have to be on planet earth as sentient sexual being!
In not limiting my self I'm more available to attract the most rich experiences with the most awesome people. Boom! X |
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"I find it interesting as to how many people identify on this aspect even if its not specifically in a D/s dynamic.
In general terms I don't play that way and can get frustrated if someone expects me to be dominant all the time.
I find that power dynamics can be incredibly intricate things and very addictive with the right person.
"
Very. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m submissive and he is dominant.
Sexybrunette |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On the Dom side |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Submissive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mainly sub with the oh, but switch quickly in other encounters...
N xx |
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By *igwilly2kMan
over a year ago
The Land of Kink! |
Dom!
But!!!
I will swith for the right people and subbing to a sexy fem or couple is at the top of me list and I'd do ANYTHING TO PLEASE
Anyone interested!? |
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